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Learning - 7/12/2009 6:06:00 PM   
Born2BMasochist


Posts: 42
Joined: 6/19/2009
Status: offline 		For the last week my relationship has been a bit rocky. And as i was thinking about what was going on i was curious to something. One thing i have noticed about being a submissive is i am constantly learning on a day to day basis new things about myself and who i am and things that can be changed to make myself a better person. First off , is this concept on the right track? If so i was wondering if like subs who learn new things about themselves out of our relationships with our Doms, does a Dom go through the same as well. Is it possible for a Dom to learn things about themselves to make them a better person, or is the one you enter in the relationship with going to be the same months or even years down the road?
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RE: Learning - 7/12/2009 6:15:34 PM   
dreamerdreaming


Posts: 2839
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Born2BMasochist

For the last week my relationship has been a bit rocky. And as i was thinking about what was going on i was curious to something. One thing i have noticed about being a submissive is i am constantly learning on a day to day basis new things about myself and who i am and things that can be changed to make myself a better person. First off , is this concept on the right track? If so i was wondering if like subs who learn new things about themselves out of our relationships with our Doms, does a Dom go through the same as well. Is it possible for a Dom to learn things about themselves to make them a better person, or is the one you enter in the relationship with going to be the same months or even years down the road?


I'm constantly learning and growing. That's what life is about. Why would a dom be any different from anyone else, in this respect?

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(in reply to Born2BMasochist)
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RE: Learning - 7/12/2009 6:33:40 PM   
SirRussellP


Posts: 107
Joined: 1/10/2006
Status: offline 		As a Dom and as a person I learn and grow each day, some days more then others. 

Now as a Dom I believe that the only person I can really control is me, so when things aren't quite right, I first look at me and see if there is changes to be made.  So I am not just learning daily but evolving.

(in reply to dreamerdreaming)
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RE: Learning - 7/12/2009 9:00:22 PM   
maia09


Posts: 113
Joined: 6/10/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Born2BMasochist

For the last week my relationship has been a bit rocky. And as i was thinking about what was going on i was curious to something. One thing i have noticed about being a submissive is i am constantly learning on a day to day basis new things about myself and who i am and things that can be changed to make myself a better person. First off , is this concept on the right track? If so i was wondering if like subs who learn new things about themselves out of our relationships with our Doms, does a Dom go through the same as well. Is it possible for a Dom to learn things about themselves to make them a better person, or is the one you enter in the relationship with going to be the same months or even years down the road?


i learn and grow constantly - so does Chairman. Our relationship is extremely instrumental in this.


_____________________________

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"I will always be the virgin-prositute, the perverse angel, the two-faced sinister and saintly woman." - Anais Nin

Owned by Chairman


(in reply to Born2BMasochist)
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RE: Learning - 7/13/2009 9:10:21 AM   
Esinn


Posts: 886
Joined: 6/23/2009
Status: offline 		After 3 consecutive weeks of your Dom being unable to assist you in your growth is the day you seriously considering finding a new one.  I know the inquisitive desire to grow, explore and learn has very little to do with BDSM.  However, in the context of BDSM this desire adds a new and exciting dynamic

Disclaimer:
I pulled the 3 weeks from a hat.  It might be 2 weeks and 6 days or 3 weeks and 2 days.  I have no data to back this claim up.

(in reply to maia09)
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RE: Learning - 7/13/2009 9:14:24 AM   
ranja


Posts: 2111
Joined: 11/1/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Esinn

After 3 consecutive weeks of your Dom being unable to assist you in your growth is the day you seriously considering finding a new one.  I know the inquisitive desire to grow, explore and learn has very little to do with BDSM.  However, in the context of BDSM this desire adds a new and exciting dynamic

Disclaimer:
I pulled the 3 weeks from a hat.  It might be 2 weeks and 6 days or 3 weeks and 2 days.  I have no data to back this claim up.



no you are quite right... it is exactly 3 weeks

(in reply to Esinn)
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RE: Learning - 7/13/2009 9:22:24 AM   
sirsholly


Posts: 42360
Joined: 9/7/2007
From: Quietville
Status: offline
quote:

One thing i have noticed about being a submissive is i am constantly learning on a day to day basis new things about myself and who i am and things that can be changed to make myself a better person.
this is not a Dom/sub issue. We all learn, change and grow on a daily basis.

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RE: Learning - 7/13/2009 9:42:25 AM   
vasha


Posts: 99
Joined: 2/20/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: sirsholly

this is not a Dom/sub issue. We all learn, change and grow on a daily basis.



oh no we dont.  ive known many that refuse to. for some unknown reason or another.  its not a good thing. imo at least.

change is inevitable (sp?)...  growth is not. 

< Message edited by vasha -- 7/13/2009 9:43:38 AM >

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RE: Learning - 7/13/2009 2:37:38 PM   
DesFIP


Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline 		Depends. We are both in our late 50's. I doubt anything earthshaking could happen to change our inner view. Small changes will occur, but major ones are highly doubtful. By this point, we know ourselves and it is unlikely that we will suddenly discover something major that is new.

I tried sea urchin last week for the first time in over 30 years. I still don't like it. The flavor is nothing to write home about and I don't like food with mushy texture.

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RE: Learning - 7/13/2009 3:08:22 PM   
DavanKael


Posts: 3072
Joined: 10/6/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: vasha

quote:

ORIGINAL: sirsholly

this is not a Dom/sub issue. We all learn, change and grow on a daily basis.



oh no we dont.  ive known many that refuse to. for some unknown reason or another.  its not a good thing. imo at least.

change is inevitable (sp?)...  growth is not. 


This is so utterly true I had to highlight it via comment.  :> 
  Davan

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(in reply to vasha)
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RE: Learning - 7/13/2009 5:28:56 PM   
LovingMistress45


Posts: 271
Joined: 2/7/2009
Status: offline 		The younger you are when you enter a relationship the more significant the changes.  Also, the newer you are to BDSM the more significant the changes.  One of the things that can cause an end to any relationship not just BDSM is when one grows and changes in ways that the other either  cannot keep with or will not accept. Ideally, both parties grow and change and are able to embrace those changes in each other.

Now at 46 I don't expect any huge changes in my perceptions, beliefs or values, however, I do seek growth and knowledge on a regular basis.  To me the day I stop learning and growing as a person will be the day I no longer inhabit this world and even then I expect that I will still be learning.

(in reply to DavanKael)
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RE: Learning - 7/13/2009 7:21:48 PM   
Missokyst


Posts: 6041
Joined: 9/9/2006
Status: offline 		eww.  I feel like spitting now.
Kyst
quote:

ORIGINAL: DesFIP
I tried sea urchin last week for the first time in over 30 years. I still don't like it. The flavor is nothing to write home about and I don't like food with mushy texture.

(in reply to DesFIP)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: Learning - 7/13/2009 9:21:13 PM   
Joseff


Posts: 505
Joined: 6/2/2007
Status: offline 		I've been with debbie for 18 years now, we're both still learning from each other.

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RE: Learning - 7/13/2009 11:04:52 PM   
variation30


Posts: 1190
Joined: 12/1/2007
From: Alabama
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Born2BMasochist

If so i was wondering if like subs who learn new things about themselves out of our relationships with our Doms, does a Dom go through the same as well.


yes.


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or old.

(in reply to Born2BMasochist)
Profile   Post #: 14
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