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Non Kinky submission - 7/13/2009 11:52:43 AM

realsub2424

Posts: 5
Joined: 4/5/2009
Status: offline

I'm not really sure where this question would fit best. I'm making the wild assumption that submissive women think more like woman not involved in this lifestyle than Domme women. If this question is really ignorant or ridiculous, i apologize.

I'd like to know anyone's opinion. I think that to accept someone as a sub or slave, a person needs to know a little about the this culture. But does anyone think that on a purely service oriented relationship a woman not involved in any kinky activities would enjoy having a sub. I'm just thinking about cleaning, shopping, yardwork, and other areas someone would enjoy having taken care of. If it was more acceptable and less shocking, do you think that everyday women would take on a submissive male and use him to make life easier.

I'm talking about pure theory here. A situation not involving a needy sub, or a kinky relationship. Simply a service arrangement where the woman could have her normal relationship, normal life, but have an extra person around to take care of things she didn't want to deal with.

Again, I hope this question isn't too ridiculous. I hope to hear your points of view.

Thanks

Post #: 1

RE: Non Kinky submission - 7/13/2009 12:12:42 PM

subtlebutterfly

Posts: 2230
Joined: 6/15/2008
From: Not your hood
Status: offline

It just sounds like a free househelp..I can't see anything wrong with this.
The only thing is that, I don't think anyone would do this in the long run without any expectation of anything.

_____________________________

~Ms. Awesomeness to YOU!~

(in reply to realsub2424)

Post #: 2

RE: Non Kinky submission - 7/13/2009 12:17:20 PM

Drakontos

Posts: 167
Joined: 5/20/2009
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: realsub2424

I'm not really sure where this question would fit best. I'm making the wild assumption that submissive women think more like woman not involved in this lifestyle than Domme women. If this question is really ignorant or ridiculous, i apologize.

I'd like to know anyone's opinion. I think that to accept someone as a sub or slave, a person needs to know a little about the this culture. But does anyone think that on a purely service oriented relationship a woman not involved in any kinky activities would enjoy having a sub. I'm just thinking about cleaning, shopping, yardwork, and other areas someone would enjoy having taken care of. If it was more acceptable and less shocking, do you think that everyday women would take on a submissive male and use him to make life easier.

I'm talking about pure theory here. A situation not involving a needy sub, or a kinky relationship. Simply a service arrangement where the woman could have her normal relationship, normal life, but have an extra person around to take care of things she didn't want to deal with.

Again, I hope this question isn't too ridiculous. I hope to hear your points of view.

Thanks

zaphira is the property of another. Master's relationship with this slave is not one of a sexual nature; nor does he partake of 'BDSM' activities with this slave. zaphira is simply property in his home. However, zaphira has no desire to have her own property; in fact, this slave would go so far as to say that she would not know what to do if she did.
zaphira is a slave for a reason; and forcing her to be anything other than what she is; would result in disaster. For all involved.

_____________________________

Drakontos
zaphira

Live with honor; serve with grace and beauty

(in reply to realsub2424)

Post #: 3

RE: Non Kinky submission - 7/13/2009 12:45:46 PM

Mercnbeth

Posts: 11766
Status: offline

quote:

...I'm making the wild assumption that submissive women think more like woman not involved in this lifestyle than Domme women...

this slave would assume the opposite...that "everyday" women not involved in this lifestyle neither think like submissives nor Dommes...they seek out an egalitarian relationship and pay a "fair" sum in exchange for cleaning services,etc. or maybe they have their kids or their partner do a "fair" share of chores they don't wish to do, around the house.

personally, this slave has submitted, in a non-kinky fashion on several occasions. to help out folks she had no intimate or kinky relationship or family ties to(male and female) around the house or with other projects---without any expectation of anything---because that is how she was rasied and she had plenty of resources not to need to be "paid" for her help.

(in reply to realsub2424)

Post #: 4

RE: Non Kinky submission - 7/13/2009 1:39:18 PM

dreamerdreaming

Posts: 2839
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: realsub2424

(snip) I'm making the wild assumption that submissive women think more like woman not involved in this lifestyle than Domme women. If this question is really ignorant or ridiculous, i apologize.

Thanks

Apology accepted. As a rather recent convert to this side of the lash, I can tell you that this assumption is entirely false. Where in the world did you even get that idea? WTF?

_____________________________

Download SLAVE LOVER. Explicit BDSM porn, with a plot! A love story, on a FemDom planet! http://www.amazon.com/Slave-Lover-Chronicles-Book-ebook/dp/B0031ERBLI/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1261973416&sr=1

(in reply to realsub2424)

Post #: 5

RE: Non Kinky submission - 7/13/2009 1:50:38 PM

Lashra

Posts: 4900
Joined: 2/9/2006
Status: offline

Most vanilla women do not think like subs nor Dommes, they think like vanilla women. What does that mean? It means they are individuals with their own viewpoints. I know some who are into very equal relationships, some who like the man to take care of everything and some who take care of everything themselves. It just depends upon the woman.

If you want a guy/gal to do housework and the like, why not? As long as your happy and they are happy I cannot see the harm in it.

~Lashra

_____________________________

“We can never judge the lives of others, because each person knows only their own pain and renunciation. It's one thing to feel that you are on the right path, but it's another to think that yours is the only path.”

(in reply to realsub2424)

Post #: 6

RE: Non Kinky submission - 7/13/2009 1:55:42 PM

Missokyst

Posts: 6041
Joined: 9/9/2006
Status: offline

Well heck... Not kinky? No expectations and you just want to help? HELL YES. Come on over. I need my internet cables rewired in my attic. I don't think your assumption about subs being more nilla thinking is correct though. It is more of a people, personal taste thing. I don't mind taking help, and if its free all the better.
It does not change my being sub as I am only sub within a relationship. It does not change me at all, I never worry if I am somehow less sub if A happens, or if someone will think less of me as a sub because B happens. As a woman who has been a boss, I say free help? bring it on.
Kyst

< Message edited by Missokyst -- 7/13/2009 1:56:07 PM >

(in reply to dreamerdreaming)

Post #: 7

RE: Non Kinky submission - 7/13/2009 1:57:23 PM

realsub2424

Posts: 5
Joined: 4/5/2009
Status: offline

Thanks for your input so far everyone. I really didn't want to say anything rude and I feel like I did with my post. I'm sorry for making such a dumb assumption, It really came from no where and I hope it an be overlooked.
Sorry again

(in reply to realsub2424)

Post #: 8

RE: Non Kinky submission - 7/13/2009 3:10:08 PM

DesFIP

Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline

OP, I'm a submissive female and although I think "Yes, wouldn't this be great" the truth of the matter is that I would feel guilty taking advantage of you like this. Because if you just wanted to do things for people, you could volunteer in a nursing home or a soup kitchen. But doing this for me would make me feel as though I was a user because I wasn't giving you anything back.

_____________________________

Slave to laundry

Cynical and proud of it!

(in reply to realsub2424)

Post #: 9

RE: Non Kinky submission - 7/13/2009 3:19:12 PM

CaringandReal

Posts: 1397
Joined: 2/15/2008
Status: offline

I've been privy to several conversations where vanilla women talked about this (I forget how the topic came up) and in all cases they had a "hell, yes!" attitude.

(in reply to realsub2424)

Post #: 10

RE: Non Kinky submission - 7/13/2009 5:27:00 PM

DarkSteven

Posts: 28072
Joined: 5/2/2008
Status: offline

OP, what you have described is known as a "service submissive". One who simply does chores and tasks. No play. no sex.

_____________________________

"You women....

The small-breasted ones want larger breasts. The large-breasted ones want smaller ones. The straight-haired ones curl their hair, and the curly-haired ones straighten theirs...

Quit fretting. We men love you."

(in reply to CaringandReal)

Post #: 11

RE: Non Kinky submission - 7/13/2009 5:53:31 PM

DesFIP

Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: CaringandReal
I've been privy to several conversations where vanilla women talked about this (I forget how the topic came up) and in all cases they had a "hell, yes!" attitude.

In conversations, sure. But in reality? Either they would be waiting for the guy to want something more or they would feel as if they were taking advantage of him. If it was a trade for a couple of homecooked meals, they would feel better about it.

_____________________________

Slave to laundry

Cynical and proud of it!

(in reply to CaringandReal)

Post #: 12

RE: Non Kinky submission - 7/13/2009 6:35:02 PM

SlyStone

Posts: 398
Joined: 12/23/2006
From: Chicago
Status: offline

quote:

personally, this slave has submitted, in a non-kinky fashion on several occasions. to help out folks she had no intimate or kinky relationship or family ties to(male and female) around the house or with other projects---without any expectation of anything---because that is how she was rasied and she had plenty of resources not to need to be "paid" for her help.

Beth I am curious, when you say you have "submitted" to helping others, do you mean that you did so because you were told to, and submitted to your masters wishes, or is it that you equate any act of giving of yourself as a kind of submission?

_____________________________

Life shrinks or expands in proportion to one's courage.

Anais Nin

(in reply to Mercnbeth)

Post #: 13

RE: Non Kinky submission - 7/13/2009 7:09:16 PM

Missokyst

Posts: 6041
Joined: 9/9/2006
Status: offline

In reality I would still say HELL YES! I have no guilt about letting people work, pay, trade or no compensation at all. I do plenty on my own, no pay, volunteer my time ect. I expect no pay for what I do if I am giving it away. I also don't believe people feel guilty in letting me do it. I know I don't feel any obligation if someone has volunteered. I figure if they are ok with it, why wouldn't I be ok with it?
I never felt compelled to make anyone cookies, give them dinner, ect. Feeling better about it would imply I felt guilty for allowing it.
Kyst

quote:

ORIGINAL: DesFIP

In conversations, sure. But in reality? Either they would be waiting for the guy to want something more or they would feel as if they were taking advantage of him. If it was a trade for a couple of homecooked meals, they would feel better about it.

(in reply to DesFIP)

Post #: 14

RE: Non Kinky submission - 7/13/2009 7:22:16 PM

Mercnbeth

Posts: 11766
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: SlyStone

quote:

personally, this slave has submitted, in a non-kinky fashion on several occasions. to help out folks she had no intimate or kinky relationship or family ties to(male and female) around the house or with other projects---without any expectation of anything---because that is how she was rasied and she had plenty of resources not to need to be "paid" for her help.

Beth I am curious, when you say you have "submitted" to helping others, do you mean that you did so because you were told to, and submitted to your masters wishes, or is it that you equate any act of giving of yourself as a kind of submission?

no, the times this slave was referencing were before Master was in her life.

this slave submitted, as in made it known to these folks that she was their "slave" in the sense that whatever they wanted done, she would do, within her capabilities...not according to her personal preferences of activites during the prescribed time she had to offer.

for example, a very nice lady ran the summer program at the local rural elementary school. she tried to enrich it with programs that would benefit the kids educationally, as well as fun activities. whatever she needed, is what this slave offered to do..painting faces, tutoring kids having trouble with math, cleaning up after everyone had gone home, going to town for supplies, refereeing games, etc. no strings attached, no monetary compensation expected.

another example..a friend of a friend was having trouble keeping up with the housework, due to his disabilities. this slave would go over once a week, clean the kitchen and the bathroom and whatever other chores he was unable to do. he couldn't afford to pay her...and it needed doing, so she offered...free of charge.

it isn't just soup kitchens and nursing homes that need volunteers...a lot of times there are folks/opportunites in your own neighborhood that could use a helping hand...and you don't know until you offer---no strings attached. it has been this slave's experience that most folks won't take you up on it...or insist on giving you something in return...even if it is a poundcake. blame it on pride or suspicion of ulterior motives or whatever.

giving of one's self within parameters that one determines all on one's own, this slave doesn't equate to submission ~ offering one's self and one's talents for another to use as they see fit, according to their parameters...or not...is what this slave equates to submission.

(in reply to SlyStone)

Post #: 15

RE: Non Kinky submission - 7/13/2009 7:32:50 PM

littlewonder

Posts: 15659
Status: offline

If someone wanted to come to my home, mow my lawn, fix everything that needed fixed, cleaned, cooked, did my laundry...all while fully clothed and in a normal manner and wanted nothing in return and left after they were finished??

I'd jump for joy and leave the key at the door while I was at work!

Who wouldn't want this?? Damn...how do I get one of those??

(in reply to Mercnbeth)

Post #: 16

RE: Non Kinky submission - 7/15/2009 8:35:03 AM

maia09

Posts: 113
Joined: 6/10/2009
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: realsub2424

I'm not really sure where this question would fit best. I'm making the wild assumption that submissive women think more like woman not involved in this lifestyle than Domme women. If this question is really ignorant or ridiculous, i apologize.

I'd like to know anyone's opinion. I think that to accept someone as a sub or slave, a person needs to know a little about the this culture. But does anyone think that on a purely service oriented relationship a woman not involved in any kinky activities would enjoy having a sub. I'm just thinking about cleaning, shopping, yardwork, and other areas someone would enjoy having taken care of. If it was more acceptable and less shocking, do you think that everyday women would take on a submissive male and use him to make life easier.

I'm talking about pure theory here. A situation not involving a needy sub, or a kinky relationship. Simply a service arrangement where the woman could have her normal relationship, normal life, but have an extra person around to take care of things she didn't want to deal with.

Again, I hope this question isn't too ridiculous. I hope to hear your points of view.

Thanks

Hmmm - stating that submissive women think more like women not involved in this lifestyle, says to me that you not only don't know anything about submissive women, you don't appear to know much about submission either. What is it you're seeking? If you want to serve someone in a non kinky way - find someone who wants that. There's no right or wrong way. There are no rules - we are all free to do what is fulfilling to us. Stop generalizing and trying to find out if what you want fits some "rule".

_____________________________

She reaches up, not for the apple, but for what causes it to be there.

"I will always be the virgin-prositute, the perverse angel, the two-faced sinister and saintly woman." - Anais Nin

Owned by Chairman

(in reply to realsub2424)

Post #: 17

RE: Non Kinky submission - 7/15/2009 10:23:46 AM

realsub2424

Posts: 5
Joined: 4/5/2009
Status: offline

Again, Thank you everyone for your opinions.

I want to admit again that my original post was very uninformed and a display of my lack of experience. I was trying to be a little sarcastic in my Original post implying that my statement clearly had flaws which I was aware of. I don't think I did a good job at that, and am sorry to anyone that I undermined by making a post that wasn't well thought through.

I do want to say that I was nervous to put a post up initially, and did my best to ask a real question I had. Sorry to those that got offended.

(in reply to realsub2424)

Post #: 18

RE: Non Kinky submission - 7/15/2009 8:22:40 PM

RealSub58

Posts: 1073
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Lashra

Most vanilla women do not think like subs nor Dommes, they think like vanilla women. What does that mean? It means they are individuals with their own viewpoints.
~Lashra

If you ask my Sir, or my therapist who understands D/s,
I am submissive. . . . . every pintuck of my fiber is subject to my submissive personality . . . . and I have my own view point on things, Submissives and slaves can be allowed to have such things as view points. Otherwise we are called doormats.

(in reply to Lashra)

Post #: 19

RE: Non Kinky submission - 7/15/2009 8:24:36 PM

RealSub58

Posts: 1073
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: littlewonder

If someone wanted to come to my home, mow my lawn, fix everything that needed fixed, cleaned, cooked, did my laundry...all while fully clothed and in a normal manner and wanted nothing in return and left after they were finished??

I'd jump for joy and leave the key at the door while I was at work!

Who wouldn't want this?? Damn...how do I get one of those??

Could you give me a call and let me know how to get in touch with this individual? The key is in my door.

(in reply to littlewonder)

Post #: 20

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