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RE: Don't make me decide! - 7/29/2009 5:50:21 PM   
kiwisub12


Posts: 4742
Joined: 1/11/2006
Status: offline 		I have no problem making decisions. I make them all day long. I make decisions for my Sir. I make decisions for my patients and my doctors.
What i don't do is enforce any of these decisions.
If Sir or a patient or a doctor takes umbridge with my decision, i amend it or abandon it all together.
Therefore, i am decisive and flexible. Great qualities for a sub/slave type.

(in reply to allthatjaz)
Profile   Post #: 21
RE: Don't make me decide! - 7/29/2009 6:05:38 PM   
JenTehLuv


Posts: 19
Joined: 7/21/2009
Status: offline 		I personally CAN make decisions on my own. But many times, when given a choice between two options I tend to be indecisive, but I think that's just me in general. I don't think my sexual preference as a submissive influences that.

(in reply to allthatjaz)
Profile   Post #: 22
RE: Don't make me decide! - 7/29/2009 6:34:18 PM   
slaveluci


Posts: 4294
Joined: 3/2/2007
From: Little Rock, AR
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: LillyoftheVally
I was wondering, people who identify as s-types do you believe that you have an inability to make a decision or simply prefer not to,

I not only do not have an inability to make decisions, I love making them and am a very decisive, take-charge type of individual. I, however, love Him and defer to Him in decision-making. Fortunately for me, He finds it very attractive that I can think for myself and make wise choices. The fact that I can make and enjoy making my own decisions but yet have chosen to submit to His decision making turns us both on

luci







_____________________________

To choose a good book, look in an inquisitor’s prohibited list. ~John Aikin

(in reply to LillyoftheVally)
Profile   Post #: 23
RE: Don't make me decide! - 7/29/2009 6:35:37 PM   
slaveluci


Posts: 4294
Joined: 3/2/2007
From: Little Rock, AR
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: kiwisub12

I have no problem making decisions. I make them all day long. I make decisions for my Sir. I make decisions for my patients and my doctors.
What i don't do is enforce any of these decisions.
If Sir or a patient or a doctor takes umbridge with my decision, i amend it or abandon it all together.
Therefore, i am decisive and flexible. Great qualities for a sub/slave type.

Yeah, what she said

luci

_____________________________

To choose a good book, look in an inquisitor’s prohibited list. ~John Aikin

(in reply to kiwisub12)
Profile   Post #: 24
RE: Don't make me decide! - 7/29/2009 8:26:40 PM   
Drakontos


Posts: 167
Joined: 5/20/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: LillyoftheVally

I was wondering, people who identify as s-types do you believe that you have an inability to make a decision or simply prefer not to, and for dominants which do you find more attractive someone who needs you to make the decisions for you or someone who decides that they want you to make them?

zaphira does not like making decisions; she prefers to let Master make them. Before Master collared her, zaphira had no problems making decisions, she did not feel comfortable doing so though.

_____________________________

Drakontos
zaphira

Live with honor; serve with grace and beauty

(in reply to LillyoftheVally)
Profile   Post #: 25
RE: Don't make me decide! - 7/29/2009 9:12:30 PM   
MMagic


Posts: 183
Joined: 2/9/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: wineDineNtieMe

I think I usually make pretty good decisions, but I often feel the need for validation. I like for someone else to say, "yes, that is the right thing to do"

But there are also times I get so bogged down in, "Well if I do this, then that will happen; but what if I do this and this other thing happens. Or what if there is something I'm not considering..." and so forth and so on. In times like these I definitely need that strong intelligent and trusted presence in my life to make the choice for or with me.



Yes yes this is me exactly and like Pixidustpet, if I have too many choices I get all up at arms about it.  About some things I'm very straight forward, don't need to think about it. I like that my Dom steps in and says..ok here is what you're gonna do, when I start getting obsessive.  Anyone tell him I said that, I'll bite your ankles, lol.




_____________________________

Between two evils, I always pick the one I never tried before. -Mae West



(in reply to wineDineNtieMe)
Profile   Post #: 26
RE: Don't make me decide! - 7/30/2009 2:17:38 AM   
kuriouswitch


Posts: 325
Joined: 6/17/2008
Status: offline 		-FR-
I don't particularly enjoy making decisions. If I'm with someone or a group, I go along with whatever they want to do, it doesn't really matter to me. The major stuff I bring to Master, but right now as we're not 24/7 I still have to make the small basic decision about groceries ect. But normally I tend to avoid all decision making or I waffle until someone gets fed up and chooses or makes me choose.

(in reply to allthatjaz)
Profile   Post #: 27
RE: Don't make me decide! - 7/30/2009 2:21:33 AM   
LillyoftheVally


Posts: 1826
Joined: 7/22/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: kiwisub12

What i don't do is enforce any of these decisions.


Great distinction!

_____________________________

'My doctor says that I have a malformed public-duty gland and a natural deficiency in moral fibre, and that I am therefore excused from saving Universes.'

Nah I am not happy to see you either

(in reply to kiwisub12)
Profile   Post #: 28
RE: Don't make me decide! - 7/30/2009 2:38:04 AM   
allthatjaz


Posts: 2878
Joined: 8/20/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: LillyoftheVally


quote:

ORIGINAL: kiwisub12

What i don't do is enforce any of these decisions.


Great distinction!


I think that depends

When we are out sailing I pay attention and totally heed to his decision. His experience and knowledge is huge in comparison to mine and if I want to be safe then I do as I am told.

On the other hand if I were out riding with Steve and his horse started misbehaving, I may make the decision on his behalf that we would be swapping horses. If I am more experienced than him with a certain things then it is my responsibility to make a decision on his safety.

_____________________________

S&M (Steve and Maria) persona libre de convencionalismos


Fan of edgeplay.co.uk

(in reply to LillyoftheVally)
Profile   Post #: 29
RE: Don't make me decide! - 7/30/2009 3:01:05 AM   
jeninvegas


Posts: 79
Joined: 6/11/2009
Status: offline 		I can make my own decisions and prefer to especially when it specifically involves something major in my life.  Now making small decisions here and there, I don't mind either way, I can make them or not.  And I mean things like where to eat, what to do, what to wear, etc. etc.  I don't really care about details like that and will flow with whatever my partner wants and decides.  

_____________________________

"If you're going through hell, keep going..." -Winston Churchill

"9 out of 10 guys like girls with big boobs; the 10th guy likes the 9 other men." --Just Shoot Me

"Baby, when it's love, if it's not rough, it isn't fun." Lady GaGa.

(in reply to allthatjaz)
Profile   Post #: 30
RE: Don't make me decide! - 7/30/2009 3:31:06 AM   
agirl


Posts: 4530
Joined: 6/14/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: LillyoftheVally

I was wondering, people who identify as s-types do you believe that you have an inability to make a decision or simply prefer not to?



Neither. I don't have an inability to, nor do I prefer not to. When it comes to HIM, however, I simply wouldn't make decisions on his behalf.

I make decisions for people that I'm responsible for and for whom it's my responsibility to do so, when required.

HE makes decisions about ME because he's responsible for that, and time has shown that he makes the right and best ones. He can see what's best for me far quicker and clearer than I can.

I certainly have come to rely on his input and his excellent ability to blow the smoke away from any tricky or awkward decisions I have to make. It's not a case of him making all the decisions , it's a case of him giving me additional tools to make the best ones for myself.

agirl

(in reply to LillyoftheVally)
Profile   Post #: 31
RE: Don't make me decide! - 7/30/2009 9:27:27 AM   
Kana


Posts: 6676
Joined: 10/24/2006
Status: offline 		I abhor mindless sycophants
I want her opinion, she just has to understand who gets the final say

(in reply to allthatjaz)
Profile   Post #: 32
RE: Don't make me decide! - 7/30/2009 11:49:21 AM   
wineDineNtieMe


Posts: 52
Joined: 7/9/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MMagic

Anyone tell him I said that, I'll bite your ankles, lol.



I like my ankles sans subbie toothmarks. So I'll keep quiet... this time, lol!


_____________________________

When everything feels like the movies, you bleed just to know you're alive.
-Goo Goo Dolls, Iris

(in reply to MMagic)
Profile   Post #: 33
RE: Don't make me decide! - 7/30/2009 12:18:36 PM   
sweetsub1957


Posts: 2201
Joined: 4/28/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: stella41b

I can make decisions and express my preferences just like anyone else. This isn't what makes me a submissive.

What makes me a submissive is my preference not to make the final decision or have the final say.


Perfect. 

_____________________________

Member: Lance's Fag Hags.

"That's not just a chip on her shoulder, that's the whole potato!" ~Lady Angelika~

In lowering yourself to talking behind my back, you're perfectly positioned to kiss my ass.

An it harm none, do what ye wilt.

(in reply to stella41b)
Profile   Post #: 34
RE: Don't make me decide! - 7/30/2009 2:30:55 PM   
leadership527


Posts: 5026
Joined: 6/2/2008
Status: offline 		For the record allthatjaz, I see this sort of thing as different. There are a wide variety of things that Carol is just plain better at than me. Heh, right now we're painting and renovating the house in prep for our move and Carol is the "house dom" *laughs*. She gives me tasks, organized activities, and in general makes sure that it's all happening as needed. I call that "delegation". Ultimately I'm always in charge. But in any specific instance, it's going to be a wild hodge-podge of time, availability, skill set, inclination, and god knows what else.

I'd have to be a pretty damned fool leader to ignore the skills of those that follow me.

_____________________________

~Jeff

I didn't so much "enslave" Carol as I did "enlove" her. - Me
I want a joyous, loving, respectful relationship where the male is in charge and deserves to be. - DavanKael

(in reply to allthatjaz)
Profile   Post #: 35
RE: Don't make me decide! - 7/30/2009 3:52:48 PM   
FawneTwo


Posts: 98
Status: offline 		I can value someone who'd care to help me make the best choices for myself.

(in reply to leadership527)
Profile   Post #: 36
RE: Don't make me decide! - 7/30/2009 7:35:32 PM   
DesFIP


Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline 		It depends on how I feel. If I'm very stressed out then I'm unable to make a decision about anything. Including what I want on the pizza.

But most of the decisions are pretty much minor and he doesn't care that much. He did mention tonight about cooking the frozen lasagna but was fine with chicken strips that don't take half that long. If the time hadn't mattered, we would have had the lasagna, but more importantly is that we ate earlier.

_____________________________

Slave to laundry

Cynical and proud of it!


(in reply to allthatjaz)
Profile   Post #: 37
RE: Don't make me decide! - 7/31/2009 3:01:21 AM   
MasterSlaveLA


Posts: 3991
Status: offline
Can't make decisions = Tedious
 
Won't make decisions = Irritating
 
Makes decisions, but asks permission = Trained



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It's only kinky the first time!!!

(in reply to DesFIP)
Profile   Post #: 38
RE: Don't make me decide! - 7/31/2009 3:53:15 AM   
Aileen1968


Posts: 6062
Joined: 12/12/2007
From: I miss Shore, New Jersey
Status: offline 		I am very good at making rational decisions and have for the past 41 years.
Within my relationship, though, he makes the decisions. It has been long sought after, on my part, to have that type of relationship.
It's quite welcome and part of our dynamic.
Sometimes his decision is that it's my choice.

_____________________________



(in reply to LillyoftheVally)
Profile   Post #: 39
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