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RE: TNG F.A.Q. - 7/29/2009 7:20:46 PM   
patwi


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FR

I was hoping for a Star Trek thread.   

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RE: TNG F.A.Q. - 7/29/2009 9:39:31 PM   
SylvereApLeanan


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quote:

ORIGINAL: fluffypet61

i'm curious...what happens when someone turns 36? 


Typically, a TNG group is either a special interest group of a larger organization (example: Black Rose Society) so those over the 35 age cap transition into the larger group.  Here in Kansas City, the TNG group I help organize is autonomous but there are other BDSM groups in the area.  Most of them are only open to those over 21, but a person can be members of both groups as long as they meet the age requirements of each.  There's a lot of overlap, so transitioning out of the TNG group isn't a major issue.  Some TNG groups also have an option for members to sponsor older "guests."  That way established couples/groups aren't split up when one or more of them pass the age cap.

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RE: TNG F.A.Q. - 7/29/2009 10:23:23 PM   
DavanKael


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Mercnbeth


quote:

ORIGINAL: fluffypet61

i'm curious...what happens when someone turns 36? 
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Roflmao, Mercnbeth. 

Interesting thread, Sunnyfey.  :> 

I have very minimal experience with the 'local bdsm community' in general, though have been to an all-age munch, a submissive's retreat, and to a tng social. 

The all age munch had a bunch of people who kinda worried me.  I'm pretty broad-minded and they managed to come up with a few things that had me feeling downright vanilla.  It was almost as if they were trying too hard.  The level of attractiveness was pretty low too (Entirely subjective, I know) and I was substantially the youngest there.  I spent most of the time talking with a fellow who had been in the Marine Corps about that as my ex- was a Marine and I know a lot about said organization.  I went out with him once, in fact, but he was looking for far a more casual scenario than I. 

The submissive's retreat was held at the local bdsm playspace, so that was a really neutral way to check that place out.  I was surprised that all of the folks who attended were females. 

The tng social I attended was more well-attended than the munch and people sectioned off into groups moreso with some circulating among the sub-groups.  There was a big emphasis on play parties and on casual encounters, so I felt kinda old and as if there wasn't a match of priorities.  The tng-ers didn't seem to be trying to come up with freaky stuff to say or claim as much as the people at the general munch and the aesthetic was more mixed. 

I suppose that I'm at a rather 'caught in between' age.  Oh, and to the 'what happens when you turn 36', at least at the tng social I attended, there was one guy there who was about a decade above that and he said he was welcomed.  Their general 'policy' was that if a partner in a grouping was 35 or under, any of their partners could attend. 
  Davan



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RE: TNG F.A.Q. - 7/29/2009 10:57:49 PM   
Esinn


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Sunnyfey

I as a Co-founder of the Tulsa TNG often get a lot of questions from people in the community about what exactly, TNG: The Next Generation is.




Calling upon the prove it rule.  I think this was a shameless plug.


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RE: TNG F.A.Q. - 7/30/2009 4:13:35 AM   
VanityFix


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if your a fan of TNG you might wanna check out BSG!
Bisexual Switch Generation! i dont have a link but it should be easy to google it...

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RE: TNG F.A.Q. - 7/30/2009 5:03:50 AM   
DarkSteven


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Sunny, I'm appalled at the attitude of the conventional groups in Tulsa as you reported them.  If us BDSMers aren't inclusive, who will be?

I suspect rather than having fifteen years of experience, they have one year of experience repeated fifteen times.

You go, girl!  People like you who are willing to organize and run things keep the communities vibrant.

And if I ever visit Tulsa, I'll bring a fake ID and check your group out.  


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RE: TNG F.A.Q. - 7/30/2009 5:17:30 AM   
BoiJen


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I've enjoyed several TNG functions. TNG, unfortunately does not have any consistency from one TNG group to the next. Every group operates differently and you can't come to expect anything from one group to the next so I often stay away from them.

The Ann Arbor TNG group of Michigan is a great one though. They (at least in the past) have had a "grandfather" rule and "intimate association" rule: if you were an active member of the group before 36, you still get to attend the functions, and if your partner is over the age cap they still get to attend with you. I don't know if that's changed with the new bylaws or not.

My big issue with most TNG groups is that they often cannot pull from a large group of vetted presenters on any given topic because they often limit their presenters pool to the age cap as well. I think that if TNG groups were more apt to having side by side presentations with individuals of the established community, there would be a bigger step to bridging the age gap and creating credibility with the younger members of TNG, which I think is a huge issue within the Leather community as a whole.

In Leather,
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RE: TNG F.A.Q. - 7/30/2009 12:19:08 PM   
MasterFireMaam


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Some TNG chapters have different age ranges. Ours is up to 39.

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RE: TNG F.A.Q. - 7/30/2009 12:23:51 PM   
Sunnyfey


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We have an intimate association rule also. As long as one of the members is of TNG age, that persons primary partner(s) can also attened TNG functions.

I suppose for us in tulsa we are lucky, since our inception, it seems like every elder in the community has offered to present a class or demo for us. I dont agree with the "rule" TNG class should be taught by TNG aged people. The Fact is we want to LEARN, and most of us, dont have the experience to teach on a particular topic (especially Edge play), so me and the Co-leader, will pick the best person to present and teach a topic, no matter if the presenter is TNG age or not. (Infact our first class, was taught by a TNG member). So it goes, either way Tulsa TNG is learning, and happily participateing in the community. It's a great thing.

< Message edited by Sunnyfey -- 7/30/2009 12:25:06 PM >


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RE: TNG F.A.Q. - 7/30/2009 1:30:38 PM   
MasterSlaveLA


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quote:

ORIGINAL: DarkSteven
If us BDSMers aren't inclusive, who will be?



Exclusive for a reason... most 18 years aren't crazy about most 58 year olds hitting on them, are in different stages in life, and usually have little in common.



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RE: TNG F.A.Q. - 8/2/2009 7:35:31 AM   
LadyPact


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Not everyone has the luxury of being able to be involved in their local BDSM community because of their age.  Due to that fact, TNGs help to serve a purpose.  People may not like to hear that, but it happens to be the truth.  There are a lot of areas still that will turn someone away who is 20.  If separation by age became a "us and them" mentality, it wasn't them that started it.  That was the older generation.

Before I moved, I was active in four different lifestyle groups.  Only one of the four was 18 and up.  I'm not saying there aren't valid reasons for those groups that still adhere to the 21 and up rule, but are we saying that there shouldn't be another outlet, too?

Personally, I'm a fan of special interest groups.  They sprung up where there was a need in the community.  When the need no longer exists, maybe they will fade out and maybe they won't.  Maybe they'll continue just because of the fact that people are social animals and we like to feel that there's an opportunity to be with those that we most identify with. 


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RE: TNG F.A.Q. - 8/8/2009 4:32:20 PM   
sabis


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I am sorry to hear that your experiences with BDSM groups here in Tulsa was different from my own. I think I was 35 (?) when I went to my first munch here. (Caveat: my Owner and I aren't social creatures, and we haven't gone to munches in about 2 years)

I saw folks of all age ranges, and everyone seemed to be welcomed equally. There was a very diverse range of folks, from sexual preference and identification, tops, bottoms, subs, slaves, masters, daddies, bois.. you name it. Folks were treated like folks, no matter who they were, as long as they could act like civilized folks. There were a number of people that Cumulus and I came to really enjoy the company of.

This is not to take away anything whatsoever from what you're trying to do - just to say that I had a very different experience in the local community. And sad that I'm now "too old" to join in the reindeer games.

In His service,

~sabis
(Who regularly get mistaken for someone in the 23- 30 year age range)
Owned by Cumulus


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RE: TNG F.A.Q. - 8/11/2009 1:55:29 PM   
Taggerung


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Personally, being a young domme myself, I've had a lot of negativity. I've also met some amazing people who have been so cool to talk to it makes me hopeful. In my area, I've heard there is a munch but, Im not 21 so, I can't go. I've talked to some older people on the site looking for advice and friendship and gotten scorn and ridiculed. I'm 19, not stupid. I hear from some people "oh I started this lifestyle when I was 16/17/18/18 but now im 45 and you can't possibly know how to do anything." Wait what? I'm looking for friends not to dom you. What the hell?
So, I put an age limit on my profile. I don't want a relationship with anyone over, I think I put 25 but, friends are welcomed in any age. And Ive been proved wrong. I think my real limit should be anyone old enough to be my parent because that would just be odd.

What Im hoping I get across is that if you don't want the younger generation to separate, don't give us a reason to. Understand that we are capable of making these decisions just like you made your choices. 

I'm a young domme. I've got so much to learn. So many paths to travel and so many new things to explore. And a lot of people to meet don't shun the chance to know me because Im nineteen and still wet behind the ears. Treat me with the respect I deserve for being willing to go against the norm and fight for something I believe in just like you did. I don't expect any more then that.   


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