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ORIGINAL: Misstoyou

What I like about this story and you going to Savannah, MoGa, is that you just didn't sit around. You are proactive in taking care of your pup and your relationship. This, ladies and gentlemen, is a Domme.

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ORIGINAL: RavenMuse

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ORIGINAL: LadySonelle
Another good concept is contained in the old book "Games People Play" where if you find yourself always arguing over the *same* thing, you can find out what script you are using, what game you are running, and step outside it to begin in a nrew direction.

Eric Berne should be required reading for all Dom/mes IMO he has a very down to earth way of explaining transactional annalysis.

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ORIGINAL: TexasMaam

I respectfully offer the thought that perhaps he's going through subspace drop. After the high of the weekend he's dropping, and not necessarily needy, but possibly resentful or resistant coming out of drop.

Or, You might be suffering from Domme 'drop'. I love the headspace I'm in when I'm with him. I not only miss that when he's gone, I experience a definite physical, emotional, psychological lull after he leaves that in a day or two can make Me surly or snappish, and just plain broody.

Knowing that it's coming doesn't make it any easier, but I prepare for it. I schedule some pampering time for Myself, schedule activities that keep Me at arm's length from him during the few days that he needs to drop, focus, and regroup. He's just not a sub who gets clingy when he leaves Me; he gets clingy after he's separated from Me for awhile.

The best thing I can do to turn him around is to not contact him. After a day or two, he gets to wondering why I haven't called and he starts calling several times a day.

Good luck, and here's a 25 gallon bucket of patience for you....

Texas Maam

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ORIGINAL: openmindedslave

Can you call him a " friend" also. I have found that the relationships that have lasted have had more than dom.sub connection. You said he's a student. He has so many years before he leaves college for a career. Does that career involve you in it or are you there for that time in life that he needs to explore his desires and wants ? Does he call you his friend? Is he the tight of person that can cut off he needs starting on Monday and by the weekend he is an entirely yours?

It may turn out to be that you have done such a good job of exploring his pent up needs that he may be feeling that he may not need the involvement as much. In college , as I remember it decades ago, the wounders of campus life and the stress of grades brought about many sides to us all. He is young and has a long future ahead..
He may not be sure what he wants a year from now, but you do...and maybe thats where the conflict begins

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ORIGINAL: openmindedslave

Can you call him a " friend" also. I have found that the relationships that have lasted have had more than dom.sub connection. You said he's a student. He has so many years before he leaves college for a career. Does that career involve you in it or are you there for that time in life that he needs to explore his desires and wants ? Does he call you his friend? Is he the tight of person that can cut off he needs starting on Monday and by the weekend he is an entirely yours?

It may turn out to be that you have done such a good job of exploring his pent up needs that he may be feeling that he may not need the involvement as much. In college , as I remember it decades ago, the wounders of campus life and the stress of grades brought about many sides to us all. He is young and has a long future ahead..
He may not be sure what he wants a year from now, but you do...and maybe thats where the conflict begins

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ORIGINAL: thetammyjo

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ORIGINAL: openmindedslave

Can you call him a " friend" also. I have found that the relationships that have lasted have had more than dom.sub connection. You said he's a student. He has so many years before he leaves college for a career. Does that career involve you in it or are you there for that time in life that he needs to explore his desires and wants ? Does he call you his friend? Is he the tight of person that can cut off he needs starting on Monday and by the weekend he is an entirely yours?

It may turn out to be that you have done such a good job of exploring his pent up needs that he may be feeling that he may not need the involvement as much. In college , as I remember it decades ago, the wounders of campus life and the stress of grades brought about many sides to us all. He is young and has a long future ahead..
He may not be sure what he wants a year from now, but you do...and maybe thats where the conflict begins

I'm sure I'm taking the above very personally but it sounds a lot like what people said and asked when I got Fox. It annoyed the heck out of both of by the way.

Two years after graduation he is still here and still mine.

Its not a matter of "time of life" or "college explorations" for everyone. College students have different levels of needs, desires, and maturity. And when you find someone you really connect with, that you love even, you do bend to their will (if you are the slave or submissive more I'm say but not necessarily) and build your career and your life around another person.

These are all real concerns and really good questions but I don't think they are exclusive to traditional college age people.

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ORIGINAL: MHOO314

I am so there--that is why the boy will be moving by fall if we can get everything worked out, if not winter at the latest--we are doing well. we will see each other when I go to Vegas on the 10th for I have sent for him, then mid April, we talk everyday--is it easy? No--but I totally agree---

however, I agree to moves IF it proves out to be a LTR or long term ( and I know you and the pup are...), I too often see moves happening on a whim--and it leaves one or the other if it doesn't work out.

Hugs to you and the pup, I know you will do well, no matter what--

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ORIGINAL: LadySonelle

Well written, pup! While I will not give commands to another Lady's sub, I will suggest that you also can buy and read Games People Play and the P.E.T. book. One tenet of active Listening is 'feedback' to ensure clarity. If your Mistress permits, you can repeat back to Her what you feel you heard Her say so that you *both* can diagnose where miscommunications are present. Likewise She can repeat back to you what She heard you say and you can clarify meanings.

Together, I feel you both have a wonderful spirit of cooperation and willingness to talk through the problems present. You are both very fortunate to have each other and I congratulate you both.

Lady Sonelle

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ORIGINAL: MistressOfGa
Yes, I truly believe we are both experiencing Dom/sub drop PLUS separation anxiety. Ive not experienced either before, so it is new to me.