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RE: Connections - 8/9/2009 11:02:52 AM   
ThatDamnedPanda


Posts: 6060
Joined: 1/26/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Apocalypso

Do people think it's possible to have an instant connection with somebody as soon as you start talking?  I know it's different for different people, but I've certainly met people who it feels like i've known them longer than my closest friends.  Is this real or illusionary?


Absolutely real, no question about it. The only problem is, there've been a couple of times when I was fooled by that and it turned out not to be as genuine as i'd thought and hoped. So I tend to be a little cautious about it when i feel it. I don't shy away from it, and I don't hesitate to move forward into the middle of it, but I do keep tabs on it as we go along.

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RE: Connections - 8/9/2009 11:05:44 AM   
slaveluci


Posts: 4294
Joined: 3/2/2007
From: Little Rock, AR
Status: offline 		Yes, I certainly do believe in that instant connection. I've experienced it several times in my life and definitely when Master and I first spoke

luci

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(in reply to Apocalypso)
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RE: Connections - 8/9/2009 11:35:30 AM   
CallaFirestormBW


Posts: 3651
Joined: 6/29/2008
Status: offline 		I think that not -only- is it possible -- when it happens it is extraordinary and a gift.

Dame Calla

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Said to me recently: "Look, I know you're the "voice of reason"... but dammit, I LIKE being unreasonable!!!!"

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Profile   Post #: 23
RE: Connections - 8/9/2009 11:42:37 AM   
daintydimples


Posts: 967
Joined: 7/6/2009
Status: offline 		I have experienced it, both real time and online. I do not pursue a relationship with someone unless I feel this type of connection and believe it to be reciprocated.

I have had situations where we turned out being *just* friends, but that has mostly been due to timing.






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Profile   Post #: 24
RE: Connections - 8/9/2009 2:43:37 PM   
windchymes


Posts: 9410
Joined: 4/18/2005
Status: offline 		It's happened to me a few times, but they're always married or unavailable in some way, lucky me.

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RE: Connections - 8/9/2009 2:56:07 PM   
naughtysubK


Posts: 62
Joined: 5/2/2004
Status: offline 		yes,  absolutely.  the current D type had me instanly so at ease the first time we spoke on the phone,   I felt as if I had always known him. 

I do think it's important not to confuse initial chemistry with 'love at first sight',  which I am very skeptical about 

(in reply to windchymes)
Profile   Post #: 26
RE: Connections - 8/9/2009 5:07:25 PM   
cornflakegirl


Posts: 183
Joined: 7/1/2009
From: Arizona
Status: offline 		Yes, but there have been times when it was really real and times when I was being stupid and not careful enough.

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Profile   Post #: 27
RE: Connections - 8/9/2009 5:15:52 PM   
lovingpet


Posts: 4270
Joined: 6/19/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: cornflakegirl

Yes, but there have been times when it was really real and times when I was being stupid and not careful enough.


I have been on both ends of this and I can honestly say wishful thinking and this kind of connection didn't feel remotely the same to me, though I seemed perfectly willing to try to equate them. I do think one almost has to experience both in order to distinguish them at times. Really that's not true, but it kind of like trying to compare one thing without its opposite pairing. Yes, you can identify it outside of such a context, but the differences and definitions become much more clear in the face of that reversed reflection.

lovingpet

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Profile   Post #: 28
RE: Connections - 8/9/2009 5:22:32 PM   
KnightofMists


Posts: 7149
Joined: 7/29/2005
Status: offline 		I think it's real... but not all that common of an occurance.

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An Optimal relationship is achieved when the individuals do what is best for themselves and their relationship.

(in reply to Apocalypso)
Profile   Post #: 29
RE: Connections - 8/9/2009 5:22:51 PM   
aldompdx


Posts: 538
Joined: 10/24/2004
Status: offline 		You experience your feelings, therefore, they are real.
Another person experiences their feelings, therefore, they are real.
The real feelings of different people can be similar.


(in reply to lovingpet)
Profile   Post #: 30
RE: Connections - 8/9/2009 5:27:01 PM   
MaamJay


Posts: 2101
Joined: 9/2/2005
Status: offline 		Been true for Me and not just with partners, more often with people who have become the sort of friends you think you've known all your lives! Actually, thinking about it, partners have had to serve more of an apprenticeship of changing feelings than have some friends.

Maam Jay aka violet[A]

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Profile   Post #: 31
RE: Connections - 8/9/2009 5:29:01 PM   
VanIsleKnight


Posts: 283
Joined: 8/4/2009
Status: offline 		It's happened a few times where me and another just simply clicked, and I've maintained a pretty good friendship with most of those people.  There's been a few people though where conversations were short, awkward, and a little forced.  Not many of those really got past that stage, but a couple have.  Nothing really illuminating there though. :)


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Profile   Post #: 32
RE: Connections - 8/9/2009 5:35:52 PM   
DesFIP


Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline 		Certainly it's possible. Doesn't mean that you are going to be perfect partners for a long term relationship. But it's still an instant connection that hopefully you will enjoy remembering. And sometimes it does last.

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Cynical and proud of it!


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Profile   Post #: 33
RE: Connections - 8/9/2009 7:15:34 PM   
MasterSlaveLA


Posts: 3991
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Apocalypso

Do people think it's possible to have an instant connection with somebody as soon as you start talking?... I've certainly met people who it feels like i've known them longer than my closest friends.   Is this real or illusionary?


Ummm... didn't you just answer your own question???



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Profile   Post #: 34
RE: Connections - 8/9/2009 7:57:42 PM   
lizi


Posts: 4673
Joined: 2/1/2009
Status: offline 		It's happened to me both in person and online. It's a very powerful and rare event when it does occur. The last time it happened was with someone I'm no longer in touch with for various reasons - it's been very hard for me to forget about him even though some time has passed.

(in reply to Apocalypso)
Profile   Post #: 35
RE: Connections - 8/9/2009 8:06:20 PM   
heartcream


Posts: 3044
Joined: 5/9/2007
From: Psychoalphadiscobetabioaquadoloop
Status: offline 		Absolutely real. Some of my closest dearest friends invoked instant deep love, comfort and familiarity in me and it was mutual. Makes life worth living for sure. Now to have it happen in a romantic connection would be incredible.



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Every single line means something.
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Profile   Post #: 36
RE: Connections - 8/9/2009 8:16:27 PM   
HarderToBreathe2


Posts: 181
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: lizi

It's happened to me both in person and online. It's a very powerful and rare event when it does occur. The last time it happened was with someone I'm no longer in touch with for various reasons - it's been very hard for me to forget about him even though some time has passed.


I'm going through the same thing, Lizi, so I feel for you.  It's hard to lose someone you care about, whatever the reason may be, no matter how long you knew them.

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Profile   Post #: 37
RE: Connections - 8/9/2009 8:16:35 PM   
pyroaquatic


Posts: 1535
Joined: 12/4/2006
From: Pyroaquatica
Status: offline 		A connection so deep can leave one in turmoil when broken. I have had only one connection like this in my life. I'm not quite sure I connect with people. This point in the game I have a desire to but many fizzle out... so I do not even try.

It is more than just talking.... or listening.

You meet that one person and you have the desire to fuse with them as one solid entity. What is a child but a result of such a deep connection.

Most of the time it does not feel as if anyone is truely listening, just waiting until it is their turn to speak. How can I connect with a person such as this.


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You are what your deep, driving desire is.
As your desire is, so is your will.
As your will is, so is your deed.
As your deed is, so is your destiny.
-Brihadaranyaka Upanishad IV.4.5

(in reply to Apocalypso)
Profile   Post #: 38
RE: Connections - 8/9/2009 8:28:07 PM   
LillyoftheVally


Posts: 1826
Joined: 7/22/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: pyroaquatic

Most of the time it does not feel as if anyone is truely listening, just waiting until it is their turn to speak. How can I connect with a person such as this.



How sad that you feel that way

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Profile   Post #: 39
RE: Connections - 8/9/2009 8:32:15 PM   
lizi


Posts: 4673
Joined: 2/1/2009
Status: offline 		Thanks, that was kind of you.
I think the hard part comes with the lack of closure- you never really know what may have happened. If anything. The question the OP posted about if the instant connection ever happens seems to be yes for all of the people who answered and I think that if those people then go out of your life they leave a bigger hole behind...

(in reply to HarderToBreathe2)
Profile   Post #: 40
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