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Being Ignored - 8/15/2009 11:09:45 PM   
Norige


Posts: 2
Joined: 8/15/2009
Status: offline 		Is there a term for, or for the fetish for, being ignored during sex? Sometimes, I love my partner to act/be really bored and unimpressed, check her watch, read a magazine or a book, watch TV and completely ignore me and be impatient for me to finish. I love the idea that she's getting absolutely nothing from it, is only allowing me to pump away at her for my own benefit, and that it's all a bit frustrating for her - and obviously how her boredom and lack of satisfaction is frustrating to me! Does anyone else enjoy this, from either side? It's a bit awkward talking about it or searching for info, stories etc as I don't know any shorthand for it e.g. "cuckolding" or "CP" are quick and easy.

< Message edited by Norige -- 8/15/2009 11:11:29 PM >
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RE: Being Ignored - 8/16/2009 12:48:23 AM   
SteelofUtah


Posts: 5307
Joined: 10/2/2007
From: St George Utah
Status: offline 		But it isn't Cuckholding.

Most would associate what you are explaining with Humiliation in that you do not please her sexually and are really just a nuisance.

I think rather than finding a term for it stick with what it is a sexual dynamic you enjoy in which it is all about your pleasure and you do noting sexually for the other person. At least that is how I read it.

Steel

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RE: Being Ignored - 8/16/2009 2:29:07 AM   
VanityFix


Posts: 141
Joined: 7/20/2009
Status: offline 		being turned on by being inadequate, ignored and being unsulted is very much humilation play, i donno if there is a very specific term other than that but this falls under the humilation umbrella. im a fan of humilation as well as many others. welcome to the forums

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RE: Being Ignored - 8/16/2009 2:35:11 AM   
sirsholly


Posts: 42360
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From: Quietville
Status: offline
quote:

Is there a term for, or for the fetish for, being ignored during sex? Sometimes, I love my partner to act/be really bored and unimpressed, check her watch, read a magazine or a book, watch TV and completely ignore me and be impatient for me to finish.
marriage 

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RE: Being Ignored - 8/16/2009 3:11:18 AM   
WyldHrt


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quote:

I think rather than finding a term for it stick with what it is a sexual dynamic you enjoy in which it is all about your pleasure and you do noting sexually for the other person. At least that is how I read it.


Bingo.
As the OP identifies as a sub, he may have difficulty with this. I know few Dommes who are into letting a sub get into their pants if he is so unskilled that they are doing their nails while he is "pumping away" and getting off. Then again, I'm a sub who is into pleasing my partner first and foremost, so I may very well be missing something here.


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RE: Being Ignored - 8/16/2009 4:40:49 AM   
Cloudz


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quote:

ORIGINAL: sirsholly

quote:

Is there a term for, or for the fetish for, being ignored during sex? Sometimes, I love my partner to act/be really bored and unimpressed, check her watch, read a magazine or a book, watch TV and completely ignore me and be impatient for me to finish.
marriage 


perfect!!!

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RE: Being Ignored - 8/16/2009 5:01:34 AM   
Prinsexx


Posts: 4584
Joined: 8/27/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Norige

Is there a term for, or for the fetish for, being ignored during sex? Sometimes, I love my partner to act/be really bored and unimpressed, check her watch, read a magazine or a book, watch TV and completely ignore me and be impatient for me to finish. I love the idea that she's getting absolutely nothing from it, is only allowing me to pump away at her for my own benefit, and that it's all a bit frustrating for her - and obviously how her boredom and lack of satisfaction is frustrating to me! Does anyone else enjoy this, from either side? It's a bit awkward talking about it or searching for info, stories etc as I don't know any shorthand for it e.g. "cuckolding" or "CP" are quick and easy.

Emotional maschism on your behalf?
Objectification for your partner?


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RE: Being Ignored - 8/16/2009 7:09:54 AM   
stella41b


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Status: offline 		Iggy-jiggy?

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RE: Being Ignored - 8/16/2009 7:20:54 AM   
cornflakegirl


Posts: 183
Joined: 7/1/2009
From: Arizona
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: sirsholly

quote:

Is there a term for, or for the fetish for, being ignored during sex? Sometimes, I love my partner to act/be really bored and unimpressed, check her watch, read a magazine or a book, watch TV and completely ignore me and be impatient for me to finish.
marriage 


Hmmm. Maybe this is why my ex was so satisfied with our sex life, while I had an intimate knowledge of the patterns in the textured ceiling. ;)

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RE: Being Ignored - 8/16/2009 8:21:02 AM   
petmonkey


Posts: 1053
Joined: 7/7/2009
Status: offline 		Just for fun . . . making up a word for faux-Scrabble.

Spernophilia:
sperno (Latin): to scorn, despise, spurn + philia (Greek): to love.  A love of being scorned or scorning someone during sexual acts.
BDSM slang: "Cold-shouldering" or "CS".

You read it here first.

i agree with the other posters.  OP, it's a good humiliation scene to offer as an example when someone asks you about your fantasies.

edited to add quotation marks and acronym.


< Message edited by petmonkey -- 8/16/2009 8:25:16 AM >

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RE: Being Ignored - 8/16/2009 9:30:05 AM   
MasterG2kTR


Posts: 6677
Joined: 8/7/2004
From: Wisconsin
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: sirsholly

quote:

Is there a term for, or for the fetish for, being ignored during sex? Sometimes, I love my partner to act/be really bored and unimpressed, check her watch, read a magazine or a book, watch TV and completely ignore me and be impatient for me to finish.
marriage 


you understand things all too well Holly....

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RE: Being Ignored - 8/16/2009 9:53:38 AM   
Daddysredhead


Posts: 23574
Joined: 11/6/2005
From: Northern (yet still part of the South) Virginia
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: sirsholly

quote:

Is there a term for, or for the fetish for, being ignored during sex? Sometimes, I love my partner to act/be really bored and unimpressed, check her watch, read a magazine or a book, watch TV and completely ignore me and be impatient for me to finish.
marriage 


Oh shit, holly! 

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RE: Being Ignored - 8/16/2009 9:54:52 AM   
sirsholly


Posts: 42360
Joined: 9/7/2007
From: Quietville
Status: offline

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RE: Being Ignored - 8/16/2009 9:57:39 AM   
Daddysredhead


Posts: 23574
Joined: 11/6/2005
From: Northern (yet still part of the South) Virginia
Status: offline 		<--------   ignoring holly

(does that turn you on?)  

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RE: Being Ignored - 8/16/2009 10:15:46 AM   
LadyPact


Posts: 32566
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: sirsholly

quote:

Is there a term for, or for the fetish for, being ignored during sex? Sometimes, I love my partner to act/be really bored and unimpressed, check her watch, read a magazine or a book, watch TV and completely ignore me and be impatient for me to finish.
marriage 

First reaction:  Funny as hell.

Second thought:  Wondering if someone might be hoping to get their bottom warmed.  (In other words, does sirsholly's Sir ever read the boards?)

Last thought:  Back to funny.


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RE: Being Ignored - 8/16/2009 10:25:02 AM   
LATEXBABY64


Posts: 2107
Joined: 4/8/2004
Status: offline 		this is a new fetish that i have never heard of i know some people like h umilation but treated like yesterdays nadda no not going to happen ever

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RE: Being Ignored - 8/16/2009 1:44:22 PM   
dreamerdreaming


Posts: 2839
Status: offline 		Fast reply: humiliation/objectification ....

I'm not aware of any label for the particular aspect of it that you are describing in your OP. But I'm sure that if you explore further in your humilation and objectification desires, you'll find plenty of other things like this that ring your bell. 

Just explain to your potentails that you have a desire to be humialiated and objectified, and detail your particular scenario as an example.

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RE: Being Ignored - 8/16/2009 4:02:10 PM   
KMsAngel


Posts: 17415
Joined: 4/13/2007
Status: offline 		mr jim doesn't read the boards often enough, is what i think.



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RE: Being Ignored - 8/16/2009 4:06:25 PM   
TazDevil


Posts: 155
Joined: 2/24/2005
Status: offline 		I do not know if there is a name for it, maybe there sould be, maybe you can make one! more or less it just called Ignored play? (do evreything need a name lol?)

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RE: Being Ignored - 8/16/2009 4:19:13 PM   
windchymes


Posts: 9410
Joined: 4/18/2005
Status: offline 		I'm trying to remember what my ex-husband called it.....dammit, can't remember shit anymore.....

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