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RE: What's with the minimum age? - 8/21/2009 11:22:51 AM   
Rainfire


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Eigenaar

I agree with you that it is ridiculous to be as rigorous as a lot of  female submissives concerning age. I experienced females in their thirties asking me where I got the idiotic idea they would be interested in a dom past 40! I encountered all sorts here, even bald females saying they despise men with long hair! While they are in their right the fact remains they ridicule themselves.


  How is it ridiculing themselves to have a preference? You yourself state personal preferences in your profile. "Decent submissive females" is a preference, or else you would just be seeking a submissive, male or female. Wait.... Seeking a submissive is yet another preference!

Personally speaking, I would not have considered a male Dominant younger than myself. Then I met Lumus. We talked and got to know each other and fell in love before I even discovered He is 7 years younger than myself. He also has long hair (as long as yours in your photo on your profile) even though again, I've never cared for long hair on a man. Then I met Him. It suits some men, not all though. And it's not something all women like on a man. I just always went with the belief that IF I ever met someone interesting enough to convince me to give up my singlehood, they would be my age or older and have an understanding of life, along with the complexities of homeownership, children, exes and the likes. Younger men were for flings and fun! 

We all have preferences, no matter what you call them. What I would be asking is "if this person has a problem with my age, without knowing me, what else might they not have going on for them?"

Just my two cents worth.... 


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RE: What's with the minimum age? - 8/21/2009 11:29:11 AM   
Eigenaar


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quote:

ORIGINAL: LillyoftheVally


quote:

ORIGINAL: Eigenaar
. A lesbian has a preference for females but most have sex with men also which makes them bisexual.


Most? Really? What about people who just like both?

Sorry your arguing is really illogical


It is unclear what you ask about people liking both. What is illogical about my arguing? Most lesbians mark having (had) voluntary sex with males when filling out an inquiry.

(in reply to LillyoftheVally)
Profile   Post #: 22
RE: What's with the minimum age? - 8/21/2009 11:30:52 AM   
sirsholly


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Eigenaar
. A lesbian has a preference for females but most have sex with men also which makes them bisexual.

where did you get this gem of information?



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RE: What's with the minimum age? - 8/21/2009 11:34:45 AM   
Rainfire


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RE: What's with the minimum age? - 8/21/2009 11:35:21 AM   
Eigenaar


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Rainfire


  How is it ridiculing themselves to have a preference? You yourself state personal preferences in your profile.



I never said it is ridiculing to have preferences. Again: ruling out is not a preference. A preference is when you prefer an apple but would not mind having an orange when there are no apples around! What is the point stating 40 is okay and 39 is ruled out? It does not make sense.

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RE: What's with the minimum age? - 8/21/2009 11:41:56 AM   
LaTigresse


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quote:

ORIGINAL: sirsholly

quote:

ORIGINAL: Eigenaar
. A lesbian has a preference for females but most have sex with men also which makes them bisexual.

where did you get this gem of information?



I was ignoring that one, just because it's not worth addressing.


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RE: What's with the minimum age? - 8/21/2009 1:22:43 PM   
DesFIP


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Eigenaar

[It is not possible to have a preference for 40 up and reject everybody under 40.

Says who? If I have had experience with under 40's or simply can't imagine raising another kid who I'm expected to submit to, that's my choice. You don't get to say what others want.

I have a preference for red hair but this does not mean you will be blocked when you have black hair.

I don't date red heads. They do nothing for me, never have, never will.

''No one under 40'' is not a preference. It is ridiculing and limiting, your ideal partner is liable to be under 40. A lesbian has a preference for females but most have sex with men also which makes them bisexual. A bisexual woman not imagining submitting to a woman is something else. And we are not being upset here as far as I know.

Where did you get the notion that most lesbians have sex with men. The ones I know don't. And why is it okay for a bisexual female to prefer submitting solely to men, but not to choose anything else about her partner? Except for the fact that you're male, of course.


Oh, and op? We aren't rejecting you because of your age but because of your profile. It's creepy.

< Message edited by DesFIP -- 8/21/2009 1:25:41 PM >

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RE: What's with the minimum age? - 8/21/2009 2:38:58 PM   
whiteslavebitch


Posts: 479
Joined: 9/10/2007
Status: offline 		Why do you consider it ridiculous what some submissives have as preferences in the dominants they seek. Don't you have personal preferences? If you strongly preferred a sub have long hair, would you not seek that?

I know that I do have very strong preferences, and would have a hard time going against those preferences if I were ever seeking a master/dominant again.

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Profile   Post #: 28
RE: What's with the minimum age? - 8/21/2009 2:49:15 PM   
Bimtrain


Posts: 40
Joined: 8/14/2009
Status: offline 		I agree with most of the posts in this thread. I can totally see why one would want a dom who is older than them. However, I've seen a lot of profiles of 19-24 year old girls who want a dom over 40 but don't say anything about a Daddy type dom (in many cases specify traits that would singl out this kind of dom). Why would a young sub want a dom twice their age?

Again, I want to make sure everyone knows I'm neither ranting or complaining. I know it's preference. I'm just always curious about any mindset which I have no understanding of.

< Message edited by Bimtrain -- 8/21/2009 2:53:56 PM >

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RE: What's with the minimum age? - 8/21/2009 2:52:07 PM   
LillyoftheVally


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Bimtrain

Why would a young sub want a dom twice their age?


Wait, one moment you are saying why dont they and now you are asking why do they? Why not ask them?


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Profile   Post #: 30
RE: What's with the minimum age? - 8/21/2009 2:56:42 PM   
Bimtrain


Posts: 40
Joined: 8/14/2009
Status: offline 		I'm asking why would a young sub/slave want a really old dom if it's not a Daddy dom they seek. I don't ask them because of the "IF ANYONE UNDER 40 WRITES ME IT WILL BE DELETED AND YOU WILL BE BLOCKED!!!!" disclaimers in their profile. I've seen this a lot and am just curious about it.

< Message edited by Bimtrain -- 8/21/2009 2:57:32 PM >

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Profile   Post #: 31
RE: What's with the minimum age? - 8/21/2009 3:04:08 PM   
thishereboi


Posts: 14463
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Eigenaar

quote:

ORIGINAL: LaTigresse

quote:

ORIGINAL: Eigenaar

No they do not redicule themselves, they are simply expressing a personal preference. We all have them.


It is not possible to have a preference for 40 up and reject everybody under 40. I have a preference for red hair but this does not mean you will be blocked when you have black hair. ''No one under 40'' is not a preference. It is ridiculing and limiting, your ideal partner is liable to be under 40. A lesbian has a preference for females but most have sex with men also which makes them bisexual. A bisexual woman not imagining submitting to a woman is something else. And we are not being upset here as far as I know.


No most lesbians do not have sex with men, if they are attracted to men then they are bi not lesbians. And if you feel that because I perfer women my own age for partners, that I am blocking you, well that's your problem. I am not going to start dating kids because you have a problem with people having preferences in who they date.

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Profile   Post #: 32
RE: What's with the minimum age? - 8/21/2009 3:11:40 PM   
thishereboi


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Bimtrain

I agree with most of the posts in this thread. I can totally see why one would want a dom who is older than them. However, I've seen a lot of profiles of 19-24 year old girls who want a dom over 40 but don't say anything about a Daddy type dom (in many cases specify traits that would singl out this kind of dom). Why would a young sub want a dom twice their age?
Again, I want to make sure everyone knows I'm neither ranting or complaining. I know it's preference. I'm just always curious about any mindset which I have no understanding of.



You admit you know its a preference, but you still ask the question?

They want a dom twice their age because that is what they prefer. Now if you want to get into each ones personal motive, you might try cmailing them and asking. Just don't be shocked if you get ignored and bitched at since your obviously not what they are looking for.

Now if your still not sure what a preference is, look at your own profile....this part

"Real Life-Long Term 24/7 TPE
I am looking for a subgirl/slave who wants to be my perfect fuckdoll. I want to make you into my perfect image of sexiness. This includes platinum hair, dark tan skin, thin heavily made up face, huge fake breasts, skinny pierced and tattooed. She'll make most pornstars look like Martha Stewart."

Now should I start a thread on why I think you should take any body type? After all, think of all those wonderful girls you are cutting out right from the gitgo.

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Profile   Post #: 33
RE: What's with the minimum age? - 8/21/2009 3:14:02 PM   
CarrieO


Posts: 2432
Joined: 1/27/2008
Status: offline 		OP,
I'm curious, why assume the young women that are looking for men 40+ are looking for a daddy dom? 

Why would a young sub want a man twice her age?  Why not?  Many women are attracted to the idea of experience that age can bring.  Many are attracted to the suppossed maturity an older man may have. Many are looking to be taken care of and feel an older man is more capable.  Some like the idea of an older man having control over them.  Some have found men their own age to only be interested in kinky sex and they want more and assume they'll find that with an older man.

There's a whole host of reasons but in the end it really does come down to personal preference. 

Why do you have your personal preferences?  Does it matter? 

quote:

I'm asking why would a young sub/slave want a really old dom if it's not a Daddy dom they seek. I don't ask them because of the "IF ANYONE UNDER 40 WRITES ME IT WILL BE DELETED AND YOU WILL BE BLOCKED!!!!" disclaimers in their profile. I've seen this a lot and am just curious about it.


Much like the question..."How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop?"  The world may never know.  Besides, you know what curiosity did to the cat?

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RE: What's with the minimum age? - 8/21/2009 3:15:18 PM   
LillyoftheVally


Posts: 1826
Joined: 7/22/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Bimtrain

I'm asking why would a young sub/slave want a really old dom if it's not a Daddy dom they seek. I don't ask them because of the "IF ANYONE UNDER 40 WRITES ME IT WILL BE DELETED AND YOU WILL BE BLOCKED!!!!" disclaimers in their profile. I've seen this a lot and am just curious about it.


Because some do. Sorry its as simple as that. It may be experience that they seek, it may be that they just happen to fancy older folks

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Profile   Post #: 35
RE: What's with the minimum age? - 8/21/2009 3:20:42 PM   
Toppingfrmbottom


Posts: 6528
Joined: 6/7/2009
Status: offline 		There are plenty of reasons age matters to people, and it'll be different for every one who has age limits. For some people under a certain age just are not good matches.
quote:

ORIGINAL: Bimtrain

I'm fairly new to the BDSM scene as a whole. I've spent a lot of time within my specific fetish but only just recently found out it, at least in part, blended into BDSM. So forgive me if I don't understand this.

If it's not a Daddy you seek than why say "No one under 40"? If a dom can give you exactly what you need why would age matter? Wouldn't it be better to have a more viral man in good shape? This should be doubly true for those seeking 24/7 situations that ARE NOT COMMON. There are few doms out there you are looking for the type of dom/sub relationship that I am so if you're a sub looking for the same I would think you'd be open to whoever can provide it.

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Profile   Post #: 36
RE: What's with the minimum age? - 8/21/2009 3:35:08 PM   
Bimtrain


Posts: 40
Joined: 8/14/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: CarrieO

OP,
I'm curious, why assume the young women that are looking for men 40+ are looking for a daddy dom? 

Why would a young sub want a man twice her age?  Why not?  Many women are attracted to the idea of experience that age can bring.  Many are attracted to the suppossed maturity an older man may have. Many are looking to be taken care of and feel an older man is more capable.  Some like the idea of an older man having control over them.  Some have found men their own age to only be interested in kinky sex and they want more and assume they'll find that with an older man.

There's a whole host of reasons but in the end it really does come down to personal preference. 

Why do you have your personal preferences?  Does it matter? 

quote:

I'm asking why would a young sub/slave want a really old dom if it's not a Daddy dom they seek. I don't ask them because of the "IF ANYONE UNDER 40 WRITES ME IT WILL BE DELETED AND YOU WILL BE BLOCKED!!!!" disclaimers in their profile. I've seen this a lot and am just curious about it.


Much like the question..."How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop?"  The world may never know.  Besides, you know what curiosity did to the cat?


A answer like that is all I'm really looking for. Thank you. Other viewpoints are appreciated as well.

Again, I have absolutely no problem with people's preference. I don't feel rejected. I both accept and embrace that I am not right for many people and many people are not right for me. If I'm a square peg I know full well I won't go into a round hole and have no problem as I know there are plenty square holes out there. Personal preference is one of the things that makes this world a beautiful place. I only wished to spark up some healthy conversation as to the mindset behind this preference. That's all. :)

And for the record, I could write a book on why I have my preferences. If anyone asks me why I prefer something (whether it be beef over chicken or skinny women over large women) I could sit there for quite some time explaining it. "I dunno, I just do" is never my answer. I try and delve into my own psyche to understand myself as much as possible. After all, if you can't understand yourself how can you ever hope to understand another when it is through your own eyes you see the world?


quote:

ORIGINAL: thishereboi

You admit you know its a preference, but you still ask the question?

Now should I start a thread on why I think you should take any body type? After all, think of all those wonderful girls you are cutting out right from the gitgo.


Preferences have reasons behind them whether it be one reason or five thousand. If you don't know the reasons for your own personal preferences I offer the suggestion that perhaps some introspection could help your life greatly. "Know Thyself"

I could write book on why I prefer skinny women. I never started any thread saying that I think other people should or shouldn't do anything.

< Message edited by Bimtrain -- 8/21/2009 3:58:03 PM >

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Profile   Post #: 37
RE: What's with the minimum age? - 8/21/2009 3:36:51 PM   
NormalOutside


Posts: 622
Joined: 1/8/2008
Status: offline 		I don't think the year you were born should have anything to do with anything at all, but some people do tend to use it to automatically exclude potential friendships/relationships/etc. While I don't agree with it, I recognize that as their prerogative.

And I realize that if they're judgmental like that, I probably won't get along with them anyway, so maybe they're doing me a favour. :)


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RE: What's with the minimum age? - 8/21/2009 3:41:02 PM   
lusciouslips19


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Profile   Post #: 39
RE: What's with the minimum age? - 8/21/2009 3:56:11 PM   
Toppingfrmbottom


Posts: 6528
Joined: 6/7/2009
Status: offline 		My partner is 11 years older than me, and we did not start out seeking to be Daddy baby, however now we are, but more in name than anything else.. You don't have to want them to be a Daddy for them to be significantly older. I have always liked older people because  they are for the most part mature, have their life together,  have their own place, have a good paying job, have their own car, and are good capable drivers, and are able to provide the kind of stability I want in a relationship, and the older ones are usually but I know not always more experienced.  Now you don't have to be older than me to be more experienced in life and relationships and kinky issues, and sexual prowess, but it helps.

quote:

ORIGINAL: Bimtrain

I'm asking why would a young sub/slave want a really old dom if it's not a Daddy dom they seek.

(in reply to Bimtrain)
Profile   Post #: 40
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