To Tired to kink! (Full Version)

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MagiksSlave -> To Tired to kink! (8/25/2009 5:03:26 PM)

I have been working 60 hour weeks at a very hard, stressfull job, and going to school which entails much time being spent doing observation hours. By the time I am done I can barely keep my eyes open let alone engage in anything... extra caricular.

I think I may be going through withdrawel but I havent the time or the energy.

What do you, other very busy people do to cope?

MS



Esinn -> RE: To Tired to kink! (8/25/2009 5:09:27 PM)

This is not helpful.  But, I like the subject name.



MagiksSlave -> RE: To Tired to kink! (8/25/2009 5:12:11 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: Esinn

This is not helpful.  But, I like the subject name.


Nope [8D] not helpful in the least. But thanks.

MS



littlewonder -> RE: To Tired to kink! (8/25/2009 5:28:50 PM)

We sleep and recover. We simply spend time together and don't do much of anything. We let our brains and bodies re-energize.



KCalli -> RE: To Tired to kink! (8/25/2009 5:52:30 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: MagiksSlave

I have been working 60 hour weeks at a very hard, stressfull job, and going to school which entails much time being spent doing observation hours. By the time I am done I can barely keep my eyes open let alone engage in anything... extra caricular.

I think I may be going through withdrawel but I havent the time or the energy.

What do you, other very busy people do to cope?

MS


I work full time, I go to school full time, and help to take care of an aging parent whom I love dearly. I MAKE time because, even if it is an hour here or two there. I need it to keep my sanity, or insanity. I make the time to take care of my needs, even if it is only for a little while. Keeps me sane. "all work and no play makes Jill the bitch from hell." Or so my family has said, so I learned way back when (when I was doing that and raising 3 boys by myself) that you have to take a little time for yourself.



sexisubi -> RE: To Tired to kink! (8/25/2009 5:55:10 PM)

just let it happen when it happens, if you force it, it wont feel right for either of you. 



MagiksSlave -> RE: To Tired to kink! (8/25/2009 6:01:40 PM)

Thats the thing though, even if I made time, and Im sure I could, I mean I have time right now dont I? I am just to tired to do anything, Im fighting to keep my eyes open right now and its just 9pm



Aileen1968 -> RE: To Tired to kink! (8/25/2009 6:13:13 PM)

Go to sleep early and then wake around five in the morning. Have fun for a few hours to start your day.



MagiksSlave -> RE: To Tired to kink! (8/25/2009 6:16:55 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Aileen1968

Go to sleep early and then wake around five in the morning. Have fun for a few hours to start your day.


AWW Aileen, how I have missed you!!!!

is a good idea on days I dont have to be in super early.



FawneTwo -> RE: To Tired to kink! (8/25/2009 7:22:06 PM)

Take time for your self is good advice.

My life was so hectic ( caring for parent, death of a loved one, in fighting, good friends moving away, and general BS)
I made it through a lonely time and i thank the universe -

I'm better than ever and I am so free and i'm ready

Have fun is even better [:)]



poeticfreak -> RE: To Tired to kink! (8/25/2009 7:26:10 PM)

for a couple of days just go home, relax and crash as soon as possible, then on the third or fourth day you should be able to find the energy for some play time



TearsofLove92 -> RE: To Tired to kink! (8/25/2009 8:05:25 PM)

In my life, if I want something, I make time for it. If I don't make time for it, I don't want it bad enough.



porcelaine -> RE: To Tired to kink! (8/25/2009 8:19:19 PM)

i enjoy the downtime. real life is always going to be a factor and interruptions including fatigue will occur. there are a million ways one can be intimate without lifting a finger. perhaps this is an opportunity for you to explore them. the other thing is cut yourself some slack and embrace these things when they occur. it will inevitably build up the desire to be intimate in the future and heighten the encounter when it happens.

porcelaine



Aanakaris -> RE: To Tired to kink! (8/25/2009 9:28:15 PM)

As a society we tend to underrate the importance of sleep in order to keep up with our busy lives. It's amazing that with all of the time saving luxuries we have that Americans are still short for time. If you can, examine your schedule and see if there are times in it for cat naps. A 20-45 minute nap can really produce some energy and revitalize you not just for kink but also the rest of your commitments.  Even a short snooze in the parking lot before classes start can help. Just make sure you have an alarm! Don't want to miss class. Try to avoid the trap of "catching up on your sleep," this does not work.

The comment about making time is true, I never seem to have time to do anything fun, so I make time. But if the issue is not time but energy try the nap and maybe a protein bar or better yet, a banana and a peanut butter sandwich. If your diet is low on energizing foods you will feel tired even with enough sleep. Protein and carbs provide energy make sure your getting enough.



Maxwell67 -> RE: To Tired to kink! (8/25/2009 9:35:40 PM)

It really is possible to "make time." But do not do it be just pushing yourself harder and sleeping less.  You can examine your life and do a bit of research then make the changes that will increase your energy and productivity.  You will get things done faster and be less tired to boot, and you will discover time that did not previously exist as well.



LadyPact -> RE: To Tired to kink! (8/25/2009 9:37:35 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: KCalli

I work full time, I go to school full time, and help to take care of an aging parent whom I love dearly. I MAKE time because, even if it is an hour here or two there. I need it to keep my sanity, or insanity. I make the time to take care of my needs, even if it is only for a little while. Keeps me sane. "all work and no play makes Jill the bitch from hell." Or so my family has said, so I learned way back when (when I was doing that and raising 3 boys by myself) that you have to take a little time for yourself.

This is absolutely the best answer that you could have received.  This isn't even a kink issue.  This is an issue that a lot of people have regarding lives that are full with responsibilities and they stop taking time for themselves.  The first thing that we cut out when there is a lot on our plate is enough rest and enough play (any kind of play, not just kink) time. 

I'm sure you're schedule is very busy, and all of those things are important, but so are you and your well being. 



YoursMistress -> RE: To Tired to kink! (8/25/2009 10:54:13 PM)

MS,

Remember that you have exactly the same amount of time that everyone in the world has.  What you are dealing with is the result of choices that you make, so own that you have the choice to do what you want to do.  I've seen some good ideas here about making time for yourself.  You have to make you a priority. 

You seem like a responsible person, with a desire to get more out of your life.  Reward yourself by giving yourself the gift of time, even if it is 15 minutes or 30 minutes, as soon as you get up.  Stretch out a little and start walking, focusing on each thing that you can think of to be grateful for.  You can't imagine how powerful that feeling of gratitude can be.  And have fun!

yours



MagiksSlave -> RE: To Tired to kink! (8/26/2009 7:11:04 AM)

Ok, yeah, I dont think I was clear enough here, it isnt a time issue becuase even with all of this stuff, I have arranged my commitments so that I have at least one day completley off during the week. Sometimes even 2 days off (this sometimes mean Im working 16 hour days but, I love what I do so thats ok) So while time can be tight at times I do have it, it isnt a matter of time, its a matter of Im so exhausted during the down time that I cant keep my eyes open to do anything but sleep!



Magik



Andalusite -> RE: To Tired to kink! (8/26/2009 8:14:37 AM)

Hmm, if you have the day off, can you do it during the afternoon or early evening, right after he gets off of work? That might fit your body's schedule better. Also, there are some things like wax play, violet wand, massage, and sensation play that feel good even if I'm relaxed and half-asleep. Once we get started, I usually get into it and want other things, but if not, it can still be fun. Adding in quick "grab ass" kind of play can be fun, too, and just takes a couple of seconds or minutes here and there - a tug of the hair, a bite, grabbing your wrists behind your back, a kiss, that kind of thing. It doesn't have to be a major undertaking!



CreativeDominant -> RE: To Tired to kink! (8/26/2009 8:15:00 AM)

Some people's energy stores are more than others.  I saw that often enough in my marriage...I got by with 5 - 6 hours of sleep a night while putting in 50 hours a week in my office, helping with our two kids, doing work around the house, etc., etc. while my ex got 8 hours of sleep a night, worked a 40 hour week and did no more around the house than I did and was still too "tired" to find time for anything revolving around us, including sexuality.  I sent her to the M. D. who diagnosed fatigue and put her on vitamins.  They helped for awhile but in the long run, it came down to making everything else a priority and us an option---to paraphrase a statement made on here by several as their sig line. 

I won't do that with anyone anymore.  Yes, my kids are grown but they still play an important part in my life as does my practice and my hot rods and my reading and my teaching and my motorcycle and my brother/family.  But if anything would start to interfere---from my side---with what I had or was trying to build with a submissive or with the energy left for our relationship/dynamic in ALL its expressions, then something else would have to take less time.  I would expect the same from her.

Did anyone ever notice that no matter what talk show it is, what magazine it is, what news program it is, that one of the biggest problems confronting couples is putting everything else ahead of the relationship?  And finding time and energy for everything else but not for the relationship---in all its expressions, including kink and sexuality---is just that.



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