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RE: dom/sub written contracts - 2/27/2006 10:23:10 PM

xxblushesxx

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Cloudz

quote:

ORIGINAL: xxblushesxx

I signed a contract at the beginning of my visit here...

My fav rule is; "Sub will respect the Dom, even when he does not deserve it"

*lol*

Last night he couldn't find his remote and asked where his control went....

Didn't know what to say....

ROFLMAO....Oh,I wish I could say I have never uttered a statement equally foolish. I hope, being a credit to him...that you paused and said "Sir, your REMOTE control for the telly is..."

I wish...

Actually, I asked him if I could post that comment in the forums...

*lol*

(oh, and THEN, I did find his remote

)

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RE: dom/sub written contracts - 2/28/2006 12:32:29 AM

phoenix1

Posts: 107
Joined: 1/7/2006
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I think that any/all contracts (no matter what the venue) are actually worthless, in and of themselves. A contract is only as good as the person's word, intent and how honorable they are.

I couldn't make it past the first page of his contract because he had too many details written down there and it was too boring to bother hanging in there, to page 2.

I don't know how everyone else is, but I'm lucky to even remember to eat some days, let alone if I'm supposed to be wearing thong undies every 3rd Wednesday and doggie position with no whining on Monday's but whining is allowed on Fridays. Sheesh!

As the saying goes.... KISS. Keep It Simple Sweety.
He is Master, I serve him. Can't get much simpler than that.

Why put down common sense items too? I don't understand that. OBVIOUSLY, any slave knows that Master doesn't want you bitching, complaining, talking back, etc. It doesn't need to be put in writing.

Then again, maybe the guy wasn't real familiar with this kind of thing. If his wife/sub didn't sign the contract, that should've been a warning sign that she wasn't as in to be as submissive as he had expected her to be. Moving foward on his kidnapping plan, was not too bright, in that case.

What about that? Was that supposedly done as part of a lifestyle fun thing, and she just got pissed and left him and sued him?

Or were they split up and then he thought he could go kidnap her back?

Being a Master is nice, but it's a good thing for them to remember that we ALL have ONE foot in the vanilla world, at least, even if we hate to admit it.

< Message edited by phoenix1 -- 2/28/2006 12:39:40 AM >

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Post #: 42

RE: dom/sub written contracts - 2/28/2006 4:39:46 AM

Cloudz

Posts: 836
Joined: 9/13/2005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: xxblushesxx

quote:

ORIGINAL: Cloudz

quote:

ORIGINAL: xxblushesxx

I signed a contract at the beginning of my visit here...

My fav rule is; "Sub will respect the Dom, even when he does not deserve it"

*lol*

Last night he couldn't find his remote and asked where his control went....

Didn't know what to say....

ROFLMAO....Oh,I wish I could say I have never uttered a statement equally foolish. I hope, being a credit to him...that you paused and said "Sir, your REMOTE control for the telly is..."

I wish...

Actually, I asked him if I could post that comment in the forums...

*lol*

(oh, and THEN, I did find his remote)

Lucky for you both that you possess one of the greatest of all gifts...a sense of humor!

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~Cloudz

"Life isn't about how to survive the storm, but how to dance in the rain."

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Post #: 43

RE: dom/sub written contracts - 2/28/2006 6:16:37 AM

MHOO314

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I find the contract to be nothing more than the work of a self centered bore-- I find the fact that this gained more coverage than the child pornography charge to be abhorrent.

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Mistress Hathor

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Post #: 44

RE: dom/sub written contracts - 2/28/2006 7:40:29 AM

amayos

Posts: 1553
Joined: 6/2/2004
From: New England
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I do write contracts, but they are not so descriptive of the desired behavior in a submissive (as shown in that link); the contract is there more to explain basic, overarching rules and principals of structure; to show the state of mind between the two parties during the signing. It is created and signed as a reference to the submissive and a display of willingness to serve. Though legally pretty moot, it is a useful exercise, nonetheless.

As for the quoted article, I personally believe the man displays a severe lack of good judgment. I don't think he represents the ideal level of caution and human understanding most members of the BDSM underworld conceptualize.

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RE: dom/sub written contracts - 2/28/2006 8:23:14 AM

MrDiscipline44

Posts: 1776
Joined: 1/5/2005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: MHOO314

I find the contract to be nothing more than the work of a self centered bore-- I find the fact that this gained more coverage than the child pornography charge to be abhorrent.

To tell you the truth, Hathor, I'm not surprised at all that this got more coverage then the child porn. You'll hear about child porn/molestation more then you hear about marriage "contracts" that dictate the wife's actions and behavior to such a degree. So they used the "contract" as a sensational headline to give the charges more public coverage and ruin a mans life forever. Most likely because they didn't have much of a case in either of the two charges.

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Post #: 46

RE: dom/sub written contracts - 2/28/2006 8:33:28 AM

ownedgirlie

Posts: 9184
Joined: 2/5/2006
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quote:

ORIGINAL: MrDiscipline44

quote:

ORIGINAL: MHOO314

I find the contract to be nothing more than the work of a self centered bore-- I find the fact that this gained more coverage than the child pornography charge to be abhorrent.

To tell you the truth, Hathor, I'm not surprised at all that this got more coverage then the child porn. You'll hear about child porn/molestation more then you hear about marriage "contracts" that dictate the wife's actions and behavior to such a degree. So they used the "contract" as a sensational headline to give the charges more public coverage and ruin a mans life forever. Most likely because they didn't have much of a case in either of the two charges.

Sadly, i felt the same as both of you. It is my opinion that a woman being kidnapped and forced into a sex and behavior contract is a much more "seductive" media story than the horrifics of child porn and abuse.

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Post #: 47

RE: dom/sub written contracts - 2/28/2006 10:48:46 AM

MrDiscipline44

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Unfortunately, girlie. I fear its because the horrifics of child porn and abuse isn't so horrific anymore.

< Message edited by MrDiscipline44 -- 2/28/2006 10:49:14 AM >

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Post #: 48

RE: dom/sub written contracts - 2/28/2006 12:24:03 PM

ownedgirlie

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Again sadly i agree. Things become so "common" that they become accepted as just another tragedy in life. It becomes another ABC Movie of the week and we become dilluted to the shock factor.

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Post #: 49

RE: dom/sub written contracts - 2/28/2006 2:06:41 PM

FelinePersuasion

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No Originally it was keep it simple Stupid. However I find calling someone stupid even in an acronym kind of insulting.

quote:

ORIGINAL: phoenix1

As the saying goes.... KISS. Keep It Simple Sweety.
He is Master, I serve him. Can't get much simpler than that.

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Post #: 50

RE: dom/sub written contracts - 2/28/2006 2:42:33 PM

Submotive

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Joined: 9/9/2005
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Good grief! i'm exhausted just plowing through the damn thing let alone attempting to live by it.

And i have to agree that the focus should be on his sick behavior in relation to child pornography - not to a so-called marriage contract between 2 adults.

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Post #: 51

RE: dom/sub written contracts - 2/28/2006 3:30:50 PM

FelinePersuasion

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This one guy on divorce court actually had a contract with his wife because she wouldn't have sex with him they had to contract that they'd do it on mondays thursdays and sundays an what not lol

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Post #: 52

RE: dom/sub written contracts - 3/1/2006 9:02:30 AM

jocelyn

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Joined: 6/28/2005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: sophia37

SOooooo. What I wanna know is, after you take a look at this, (I sure hope the link works, let me know if not!) has anyone here ever written contracts of this sort? Tell me what you think.

Master and I do have a contract, but it's less detailed than the one in the Smoking Gun piece. We also have an agreement (both orally and in the document) that acknowledges that such a contract isn't enforceable with regard to societal norms and will not be used in any legal setting. I like the formality of a contract, just like I need the structure of a collar and the rules and rituals used in our home.

I'm not energetic enough to dig out the full story that TSG trumpeted so happily, but I do know that the contract in question, though written with a little more detail than some I've read, is not unusual at all. Using the search term "consensual slave contract" will yield some interesting examples.

I would like to think that those of us who share an interest in what society would call an "alternative lifestyle" would treasure the personal freedom to articulate our promises to each other as we choose. Those freedoms are particularly fragile right now.

jocelyn

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Post #: 53

RE: dom/sub written contracts - 3/1/2006 12:06:33 PM

ProtagonistLily

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quote:

Well of course, but i thought we were talking about the contract.

Yeah we are. I looked at it last night, and tried to look at it for what the document said and not for the stuff I knew about this guy. I called a submissive friend of mine and shot her the link and over a couple of cocktails, we laughed our asses off.

This woman got sex toys for her birthday, lingerie and days off for good behavior, and extra days off for blowjobs to climax. If you throw out everything you know about this man and look at that contract at face value, it's not exactly god-awful and it's not that unlike other contracts I've seen.

The problem is that we are influenced by the fact that we knew the guy was a child pornographer before we saw the contract. If you can filter that out, the contract isn't horrid as far as contracts go.

Kassie

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Post #: 54

RE: dom/sub written contracts - 3/1/2006 10:08:59 PM

ownedgirlie

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Absolutely. i agree, it is a bit difficult to filter that part out.

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Post #: 55

RE: dom/sub written contracts - 3/2/2006 10:49:02 PM

Aimtoplease101

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From: San Diego, California
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One issue, among many, is that this is not, by definition, a contract, since his wife never consented to it. You can't have an agreement unless and until the other party agrees, and she apparently did not.

While even if she had agreed, the deal would not have been enforceable, it might have been effective to establish her consent to certain conduct by him which, absent her consent, is a crime.

It's the same principal under which a D/s discipline session does not constitute battery, but the exact same physical action without consent of the person on the receiving end would.

ATP

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RE: dom/sub written contracts - 3/5/2006 10:18:09 AM

sophia37

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Well thanks for the good discussion people! That was great!
Also, like the one person who asked if any of us would be willing to post our own contract for all to see,
I DID consider it.
But then I realized mine would come out sounding more like a newspaper ad in search of a live-in cook, housekeeper and executive secretary.
And while I might be thrilled to get someone like that, I doubt anyone would answer my ad, much less read the contract! lololol

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Post #: 57

RE: dom/sub written contracts - 3/5/2006 10:43:11 AM

MHOO314

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quote:

ORIGINAL: MrDiscipline44

Unfortunately, girlie. I fear its because the horrifics of child porn and abuse isn't so horrific anymore.

I would tend to agree with you, something else has taken the place to hold "listeners" attention---

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Mistress Hathor

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