sense of self

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windy135 -> sense of self (2/25/2006 8:38:40 PM)
Do you ever just want something so badly, that you can feel the empty space where it should be? The yearning fades for a while but it always seems to come back. Those moments where you breath in the sweet world, get sparse. Those moments where everything around you is amazing and you feel alive just don’t happen as often. You wonder if it will ever be the same? You wonder if you will ever feel like you use to? What is it you long for? What do you think will fill your space? <I’m not sure what will fill mine? But a warm night on a front porch near a pond. The ponds surface lit with fireflies. Frogs loudly croaking and the feel of a light breeze through my hair cooling me just enough. A record player, spewing an old jazz song from the open window on the porch. A clear sense of self, would be wonderful.>

seaturtle50 -> RE: sense of self (2/25/2006 9:05:38 PM)
quote: Do you ever just want something so badly, that you can feel the empty space where it should be? The yearning fades for a while but it always seems to come back. Those moments where you breath in the sweet world, get sparse. Those moments where everything around you is amazing and you feel alive just don’t happen as often. You wonder if it will ever be the same? You wonder if you will ever feel like you use to? Yes. This is the problem with experiencing the "technicolor" of life - when it then goes absent, one knows what one is missing. quote: What is it you long for? What do you think will fill your space? i long for a certain feeling. That is my answer to both of those questions. <I’m not sure what will fill mine? But a warm night on a front porch near a pond. The ponds surface lit with fireflies. Frogs loudly croaking and the feel of a light breeze through my hair cooling me just enough. A record player, spewing an old jazz song from the open window on the porch. A clear sense of self, would be wonderful.> Well you are lucky then, cause i do not see any reason why you cannot attain this reality for yourself ... if you want to. Have Fun Anyway [8\|] st50

Gauge -> RE: sense of self (2/25/2006 11:18:40 PM)
quote: Do you ever just want something so badly, that you can feel the empty space where it should be? The yearning fades for a while but it always seems to come back. Those moments where you breath in the sweet world, get sparse. Those moments where everything around you is amazing and you feel alive just don’t happen as often. You wonder if it will ever be the same? You wonder if you will ever feel like you use to? What is it you long for? What do you think will fill your space? Oh, this is an easy one. The love of an adoring woman. There is, in my life, no greater desire. I could add that I long for my two sons to grow up and be happy with themselves and for them to achieve their hopes and dreams.

brightspot -> RE: sense of self (2/25/2006 11:58:58 PM)
Being a fellow Minnesotan I long for a cabin by the lake every summer. I just love the lake at night and all the stars you can see and of course the call of the loons. Right now though I long for Chicago and the comfort of MsN's arms[&o]. *Brightspot

windy135 -> RE: sense of self (2/26/2006 12:36:17 AM)
seaturtle: Yes I believe I can understand what you mean. My want would bring about such feeling. Gauge: Is there anything you want more than another person? But I guess I could add on to my want, as I want a child someday... it would fullfill part of me. brightspot: good to meet a fellow Minnesotan. I also love the outdoors and I can't wait for summer... so I can enjoy it. I think I have cabin fever.

IronBear -> RE: sense of self (2/26/2006 1:16:33 AM)
I have an excelent of self. I know exactly who and what I am, my weaknesses and my strengths. Soo what do I have a deep yearning for? There are two things, The lesser one is a girl, a kajira in my collar. I am aware that this is most unlikely so I placed that one on my alter and let the Goddess and the Horned God sort that out.. The most important want/yearing/need/desire (you pays your money and takes your pick), is to have finances set up to such a self sustaining level that them I am taken by a Golden Eyed Bear to meet the Great Bear where the sky meets the earth. my love, best friend, Free Compoanion and Wife, Lady Neets is set and wants for nothing financially.......... Frankly, I can live with continual pain and diabeties and other problems but I can not live with the thought that she will not be looked after. “You gotta play the game. It’s all in the game and how you play it!”

dincubus -> RE: sense of self (2/26/2006 1:32:10 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: windy135 Do you ever just want something so badly, that you can feel the empty space where it should be? The yearning fades for a while but it always seems to come back. Those moments where you breath in the sweet world, get sparse. Those moments where everything around you is amazing and you feel alive just don’t happen as often. You wonder if it will ever be the same? You wonder if you will ever feel like you use to? What is it you long for? What do you think will fill your space? <I’m not sure what will fill mine? But a warm night on a front porch near a pond. The ponds surface lit with fireflies. Frogs loudly croaking and the feel of a light breeze through my hair cooling me just enough. A record player, spewing an old jazz song from the open window on the porch. A clear sense of self, would be wonderful.> for the longest time i had longed for someone, then i finally realized it was not to be. what can become of this, i do not know. time will only tell, assurdedly there is the one for me out there. hopefully i have found that one

fergus -> RE: sense of self (2/26/2006 6:55:24 AM)
The emptiness can never truly be filled with another person. That is just a temporary illusion. In fact, the 'emptiness' does not need to be filled at all. A wheel has spokes, but it is the space in the center that makes is useful. A cauldron is usefull because of the space in which to hold something, yet ... as soon as something is placed inside, it's space becomes more limited. Sometimes we feel empty (and that is okay, being human we are supposed to feel the full scope of things, and don't let any of your feelings slip by unnoticed). Sometimes we feel low on energy. There is limitless energy all around us all the time. We often don't know how to tap into that, so we feel as if we need to take the energy from someone who can. Some people do this on purpose, others don't know they are doing it. Ever talk to a person who feels 'draining'? When you are low, remember that you can 'fill that space' with someone else's energy, but that is only temporary. And draining to them. There is real limitless energy all around all the time. And that feeling you get on knowing everything all at once? That fleeting moment of being connected to the whole univierse, yet it is gone in a flash? A scientist would call that a "eureka!" moment. Instant inspiration. Joseph Campbell described it as a moment of atonement at one ment When you are connected to all that is. fergus

PenelopePitstop -> RE: sense of self (2/26/2006 7:44:21 AM)
I agree with fergus, but no-one is denying it can be a horrible painful feeling. However, what it does do is indicate that something needs changing, so perhaps you are more in touch with your sense of self than you think. Some people go through life never feeling this and leaving behind the most unbelievable messes.

Littlepita -> RE: sense of self (2/26/2006 7:56:48 AM)
I long to be in his arms, over his knee or anywhere else he wants me as long as we are together. I have longed for him for 10 months now and the wait is just about over. Will it fill the emptiness that has lived in me for so very long? God I sure hope so!!

PenelopePitstop -> RE: sense of self (2/26/2006 8:29:24 AM)
expressing feelings via art/writing/music etc is supposed to be very good for yearning - would you be able to do that?

windy135 -> RE: sense of self (2/26/2006 10:26:07 AM)
Ferges: I loved your reply. I agree that a person can't fill a void with another person. Just like you can't look for someone else to make you happy that's something you need to do for yourself. PenelopePitstop: Yes I use to draw in a creative journal all the time when I felt like something was missing. thanks for the tip I should start up again.

Gauge -> RE: sense of self (2/26/2006 12:20:22 PM)
quote: Gauge: Is there anything you want more than another person? But I guess I could add on to my want, as I want a child someday... it would fullfill part of me. Peace of mind, body and soul. While it is true that happiness cannot be based on someone else it sure wouldn't hurt to have someone to share my life with. This is such a loaded question you have posed because everyone sees things differently.

windy135 -> RE: sense of self (2/26/2006 12:51:57 PM)
quote: Peace of mind, body and soul. While it is true that happiness cannot be based on someone else it sure wouldn't hurt to have someone to share my life with. This is such a loaded question you have posed because everyone sees things differently. I know but I kinda like all the different responses. Everyone should take it as they first see it.. there are no wrong answers for this question.

MstrssPassion -> RE: sense of self (2/26/2006 1:22:16 PM)
"People spend a lifetime searching for happiness; looking for peace. They chase idle dreams, addictions, religions, even other people, hoping to fill the emptiness that plagues them. The irony is the only place they ever needed to search was within." ~Ramona L. Anderson I have used this quote for years now. It is for the very same things you mention in your post fergus. quote: fergus: Sometimes we feel empty (and that is okay, being human we are supposed to feel the full scope of things, and don't let any of your feelings slip by unnoticed). Sometimes we feel low on energy. There is limitless energy all around us all the time. We often don't know how to tap into that, so we feel as if we need to take the energy from someone who can. Some people do this on purpose, others don't know they are doing it. Ever talk to a person who feels 'draining'? When you are low, remember that you can 'fill that space' with someone else's energy, but that is only temporary. And draining to them. There is real limitless energy all around all the time. Then there are those that seek out others, not for who they are but what they feel they can provide for them. I'm sure I don't need to explain this in great detail for those of you who have experienced this form of contact.

champagnewishes -> RE: sense of self (2/27/2006 1:06:48 AM)
quote: the 'emptiness' does not need to be filled at all. I have learned more about myself during these times than at any other time in my life. Part of me welcomes "empty" for it is a time where i can unselfishly become self absorbed without feeling guilty. quote: You wonder if it will ever be the same? You wonder if you will ever feel like you use to? I know it won't ever be the same...i always hope that i continue to grow and learn so when the emptiness is filled, it can only be bigger and better than it was before. quote: A scientist would call that a "eureka!" moment. Instant inspiration. Joseph Campbell described it as a moment of atonement at one ment When you are connected to all that is. and I call it simply "living"...

LokisBrat -> RE: sense of self (2/27/2006 6:18:27 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: fergus The emptiness can never truly be filled with another person. That is just a temporary illusion. In fact, the 'emptiness' does not need to be filled at all. A wheel has spokes, but it is the space in the center that makes is useful. A cauldron is usefull because of the space in which to hold something, yet ... as soon as something is placed inside, it's space becomes more limited. Sometimes we feel empty (and that is okay, being human we are supposed to feel the full scope of things, and don't let any of your feelings slip by unnoticed). Sometimes we feel low on energy. There is limitless energy all around us all the time. We often don't know how to tap into that, so we feel as if we need to take the energy from someone who can. Some people do this on purpose, others don't know they are doing it. Ever talk to a person who feels 'draining'? When you are low, remember that you can 'fill that space' with someone else's energy, but that is only temporary. And draining to them. There is real limitless energy all around all the time. And that feeling you get on knowing everything all at once? That fleeting moment of being connected to the whole univierse, yet it is gone in a flash? A scientist would call that a "eureka!" moment. Instant inspiration. Joseph Campbell described it as a moment of atonement at one ment When you are connected to all that is. fergus There's a book called Flow: The Psychology of Optimal Experience which studies this moment. It's available on Amazon (haven't gotten my little hands on it Yet!), scroll down the page to see reviews. Flow: The Psychology of Optimal Experience Another thing too, people referred to as "draining" is something covered in a great book by James Redfield called The Celestine Prophecy which has spawned a whole series now. It is a wonderful (IMHO) take on energy and how we get it and give it, including "energy vampires." brat

RavenMuse -> RE: sense of self (2/27/2006 6:46:38 AM)
Now I know my flat is going to be ready soon then I already have everything I need to be content. To be HAPPY however, well there is a certain pretty neck that would fill the space inside a collar with my name on it quite nicely[:)]

PenelopePitstop -> RE: sense of self (3/2/2006 11:50:39 AM)
Controversy : I don't think attaining a state of happiness would do me any good personally. It would take away all the reasons I have for being here. If you become truly happy - what happens next? I would imagine that one's value system crumbles and an Anne Rice-esque boredom sets in...

RiotGirl -> RE: sense of self (3/2/2006 2:24:07 PM)
Yes i get it...... and i usually fill it with drugs. (i'm joking joking... ) but yeah i know.. old times.. old ppl.. old places.. england.. hong kong.. old feelings with ppl i used to care about. Sometimes i miss my old "self" the 15 year old me, who was on top of the world, had the world by the balls, and just knew. Every thought, idea, everything was in order. i knew excatly who i was and i was quite pleased. i was unstoppable. i knew excaty where i fit in with the world. i had ppl that followed me, ppl i followed, ppl i protected and ppl that protected me. i was also probably a train wreck waiting to happen, an unstopable one.. but none the less. And i loved having the world at my finger tips. Literally anywhere i wanted to go anythig i wanted to do. God i loved it. i loved everything, everything about it. Even just sitting quietly staring out the window at all the ferry's going back and forth or the fisherman fishing over on the gold coast. And i'd give almost anything to go back. If nothing else just to walk the old haunts, to enjoy the mix of cultures, to crane my neck up to look at sky scrapers, to ride the ferrys and of course to see how the commies changed it all. But sometimes.. the feeling you're talking about.. i tend to just sit and stare up at the sky and "feel" the universe moving around me.

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