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Sissy Men - 9/3/2009 6:46:24 PM   
naughty2pls


Posts: 9
Joined: 8/13/2009
Status: offline 		How do most sissy men react when their Mistress reacts to poor behavior on your part? 

Recently I've encountered one that reacted in a way in which I cannot communicate with presently and it upsets me.  I want to talk with them about our issue but they refuse to communicate.  Is this common?

< Message edited by naughty2pls -- 9/3/2009 6:47:15 PM >
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: Sissy Men - 9/3/2009 7:24:53 PM   
shadowowl


Posts: 198
Joined: 5/31/2004
Status: offline 		Communication is importent regardless if they are sissy or anything else.     I would say it is common no matter if they are sissy, or even Dom there are far to many people that with draw into themselves when upset because of fear of confrontation.  It may be common but definitily not a good thing.  I am guilty of it myself at times but I am working on overcoming that and telling my D when something upsets me.  Running off to be alone is ok sometimes but issues need to be addressed or relationships are doomed for failure.  
If they refuse to communicate that makes it very difficult if your relationship is fairly new then it's probably already over but I don't know the details :P  so don't listen to me only you really know that.   But from what I see.  The sub is doing something that upsets you,  he wont explain why or try to work it out in a way you want, which is in effect a way to try to gain leverage over you and shift power in the relationship dynamics via manupulation (many sissys are very manupulative in subtle ways)    If I was the sissy and I have been in that situation and done similar things then what would work would be to put your foot down and take charge of the situation make it clear you wont put up with it.   This will either provoke a fight (which may result in things being fixed or permently broken)  or it will snap him into line.    Again I don't know the details of your situation so this is only general opinion based on my own experiances.  I am not sure I clasify as a "sissy"   as I don't think of my self like that however some would probably argue that fact lol. 

(in reply to naughty2pls)
Profile   Post #: 2
RE: Sissy Men - 9/3/2009 7:30:55 PM   
naughty2pls


Posts: 9
Joined: 8/13/2009
Status: offline 		I simply felt most connected to this submission man who is a part-time TV who truly enjoys being a sissy.   Looking back, after we made a connection he withdrew completely.  I in turn got outraged because of the lack of communication.
He is someone I would want to keep as a friend as I value him and enjoyed girlie shopping with him as well.  I cannot manage to get one sentence out of him and its all cold communication.

Funny how submissives offer the world when they don't know you other than online then once you get into the reality of it, everything changes.  That's when being Dominant becomes a true form of art. 

(in reply to shadowowl)
Profile   Post #: 3
RE: Sissy Men - 9/3/2009 8:05:07 PM   
shadowowl


Posts: 198
Joined: 5/31/2004
Status: offline 		maybe being a sub was just a fantasy for him and when faced with reality was a bit of a wake up call.   Hard to say though if he's not talking could be any number of things guessing games suck :(

(in reply to naughty2pls)
Profile   Post #: 4
RE: Sissy Men - 9/3/2009 9:21:06 PM   
junecleaver


Posts: 1145
Joined: 4/6/2005
Status: offline 		I've only dealt with one sissy sub and he was a pain in the ass.  When someone has a less mainstream fetish, there probability of being do-me raises significantly in my eyes.

_____________________________


"No one will ever win the battle of the sexes; there's too much fraternizing with the enemy. "
--Henry A. Kissinger

(in reply to shadowowl)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: Sissy Men - 9/4/2009 3:00:06 AM   
allthatjaz


Posts: 2878
Joined: 8/20/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: junecleaver

I've only dealt with one sissy sub and he was a pain in the ass.  When someone has a less mainstream fetish, there probability of being do-me raises significantly in my eyes.


Well thats not my experience. Some of the best subs I have had are sissy girls. I find them to be generally less inhibited.
I would certainly call 'sissy' main stream. You only have to look at the profiles on here to see that its one of the more common fetishes.

naughty2pls... I'm sorry this has happened and without talking to him directly its impossible to know his reasons.
Consider part of this could be fear. T-girls and sissies are great once they have embraced that other vital part of themselves but often have an inner emotional struggle when coming out. There is still a lot of prejudice and unacceptance towards these people even on boards such as this and on top of that he could be facing a lot of inner demons.
The other thing I have found (more so with T-girls) is that when they first come out they are often over sensitive to comments. Its as though they are looking for your unacceptance in some way 'too good to be true' sort of stuff.

I would be tempted to write to him and tell him that you are trying to understand the lack of communication but you just want him to know that you will always be there as a friend.

_____________________________

S&M (Steve and Maria) persona libre de convencionalismos


Fan of edgeplay.co.uk

(in reply to junecleaver)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: Sissy Men - 9/4/2009 3:19:41 AM   
daintydimples


Posts: 967
Joined: 7/6/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: allthatjaz


quote:

ORIGINAL: junecleaver

I've only dealt with one sissy sub and he was a pain in the ass.  When someone has a less mainstream fetish, there probability of being do-me raises significantly in my eyes.


Well thats not my experience. Some of the best subs I have had are sissy girls. I find them to be generally less inhibited.
I would certainly call 'sissy' main stream. You only have to look at the profiles on here to see that its one of the more common fetishes.

naughty2pls... I'm sorry this has happened and without talking to him directly its impossible to know his reasons.
Consider part of this could be fear. T-girls and sissies are great once they have embraced that other vital part of themselves but often have an inner emotional struggle when coming out. There is still a lot of prejudice and unacceptance towards these people even on boards such as this and on top of that he could be facing a lot of inner demons.
The other thing I have found (more so with T-girls) is that when they first come out they are often over sensitive to comments. Its as though they are looking for your unacceptance in some way 'too good to be true' sort of stuff.

I would be tempted to write to him and tell him that you are trying to understand the lack of communication but you just want him to know that you will always be there as a friend.



Wonderful answer and one I agree with completely.




_____________________________

Some soften by the forced reflection that comes from loss; others harden. Which are you?




(in reply to allthatjaz)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: Sissy Men - 9/4/2009 4:11:23 AM   
stella41b


Posts: 4258
Joined: 10/16/2007
From: SW London (UK)
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: allthatjaz


quote:

ORIGINAL: junecleaver

I've only dealt with one sissy sub and he was a pain in the ass.  When someone has a less mainstream fetish, there probability of being do-me raises significantly in my eyes.


Well thats not my experience. Some of the best subs I have had are sissy girls. I find them to be generally less inhibited.
I would certainly call 'sissy' main stream. You only have to look at the profiles on here to see that its one of the more common fetishes.

naughty2pls... I'm sorry this has happened and without talking to him directly its impossible to know his reasons.
Consider part of this could be fear. T-girls and sissies are great once they have embraced that other vital part of themselves but often have an inner emotional struggle when coming out. There is still a lot of prejudice and unacceptance towards these people even on boards such as this and on top of that he could be facing a lot of inner demons.
The other thing I have found (more so with T-girls) is that when they first come out they are often over sensitive to comments. Its as though they are looking for your unacceptance in some way 'too good to be true' sort of stuff.

I would be tempted to write to him and tell him that you are trying to understand the lack of communication but you just want him to know that you will always be there as a friend.


Excellent post.

_____________________________

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also Facebook
http://stella.baker.tripod.com/
50NZpoints
Q2
Simply Q

(in reply to allthatjaz)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: Sissy Men - 9/4/2009 4:16:28 AM   
naughty2pls


Posts: 9
Joined: 8/13/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: allthatjaz


quote:

ORIGINAL: junecleaver

I've only dealt with one sissy sub and he was a pain in the ass.  When someone has a less mainstream fetish, there probability of being do-me raises significantly in my eyes.


Well thats not my experience. Some of the best subs I have had are sissy girls. I find them to be generally less inhibited.
I would certainly call 'sissy' main stream. You only have to look at the profiles on here to see that its one of the more common fetishes.

naughty2pls... I'm sorry this has happened and without talking to him directly its impossible to know his reasons.
Consider part of this could be fear. T-girls and sissies are great once they have embraced that other vital part of themselves but often have an inner emotional struggle when coming out. There is still a lot of prejudice and unacceptance towards these people even on boards such as this and on top of that he could be facing a lot of inner demons.
The other thing I have found (more so with T-girls) is that when they first come out they are often over sensitive to comments. Its as though they are looking for your unacceptance in some way 'too good to be true' sort of stuff.

I would be tempted to write to him and tell him that you are trying to understand the lack of communication but you just want him to know that you will always be there as a friend.



Thank you for your kind offer but I will pass.
If I am going thru all this in the beginning, imagine what I am going to be dealt with if I continue this path with him. 

(in reply to allthatjaz)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: Sissy Men - 9/4/2009 4:27:19 AM   
naughty2pls


Posts: 9
Joined: 8/13/2009
Status: offline 		For the record, I do have any problem with sissy girls persay just lack of communication.  I like to be upfront with where I stand, where he stands, etc.

(in reply to naughty2pls)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: Sissy Men - 9/4/2009 4:27:42 AM   
thishereboi


Posts: 14463
Joined: 6/19/2008
Status: offline 		Depends on the sissy in question. Everyone is different and will react to things in different ways. If you meet someone and can't communicate with them, then maybe your not compatible. In that case it might be better to keep looking.

_____________________________

"Sweetie, you're wasting your gum" .. Albert


This here is the boi formerly known as orfunboi


(in reply to naughty2pls)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: Sissy Men - 9/4/2009 4:31:01 AM   
thishereboi


Posts: 14463
Joined: 6/19/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: naughty2pls

I simply felt most connected to this submission man who is a part-time TV who truly enjoys being a sissy.   Looking back, after we made a connection he withdrew completely.  I in turn got outraged because of the lack of communication.
He is someone I would want to keep as a friend as I value him and enjoyed girlie shopping with him as well.  I cannot manage to get one sentence out of him and its all cold communication.

Funny how submissives offer the world when they don't know you other than online then once you get into the reality of it, everything changes.  That's when being Dominant becomes a true form of art. 


What I find funny, or maybe I should use the word sad, is when someone decides that all submissives are one way, because they have met some who are. So you consider being judgemental an art?

_____________________________

"Sweetie, you're wasting your gum" .. Albert


This here is the boi formerly known as orfunboi


(in reply to naughty2pls)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: Sissy Men - 9/4/2009 4:53:18 AM   
allthatjaz


Posts: 2878
Joined: 8/20/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: naughty2pls

quote:

ORIGINAL: allthatjaz


quote:

ORIGINAL: junecleaver

I've only dealt with one sissy sub and he was a pain in the ass.  When someone has a less mainstream fetish, there probability of being do-me raises significantly in my eyes.


Well thats not my experience. Some of the best subs I have had are sissy girls. I find them to be generally less inhibited.
I would certainly call 'sissy' main stream. You only have to look at the profiles on here to see that its one of the more common fetishes.

naughty2pls... I'm sorry this has happened and without talking to him directly its impossible to know his reasons.
Consider part of this could be fear. T-girls and sissies are great once they have embraced that other vital part of themselves but often have an inner emotional struggle when coming out. There is still a lot of prejudice and unacceptance towards these people even on boards such as this and on top of that he could be facing a lot of inner demons.
The other thing I have found (more so with T-girls) is that when they first come out they are often over sensitive to comments. Its as though they are looking for your unacceptance in some way 'too good to be true' sort of stuff.

I would be tempted to write to him and tell him that you are trying to understand the lack of communication but you just want him to know that you will always be there as a friend.



Thank you for your kind offer but I will pass.
If I am going thru all this in the beginning, imagine what I am going to be dealt with if I continue this path with him. 



I'm sorry my answer was not what you wanted!. If you have all ready decided to move along because your not prepared to continue this path then why ask the question in the first place?

_____________________________

S&M (Steve and Maria) persona libre de convencionalismos


Fan of edgeplay.co.uk

(in reply to naughty2pls)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: Sissy Men - 9/4/2009 4:58:38 AM   
stella41b


Posts: 4258
Joined: 10/16/2007
From: SW London (UK)
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: junecleaver

I've only dealt with one sissy sub and he was a pain in the ass.  When someone has a less mainstream fetish, there probability of being do-me raises significantly in my eyes.


Hmm, 'less than mainstream'? Aren't we all less than mainstream here in some way?

Reading this thread there's a word beginning with 'F' and ending in 'M' which comes to mind, but I think we'll leave it at that.

_____________________________

CM's Resident Lyricist
also Facebook
http://stella.baker.tripod.com/
50NZpoints
Q2
Simply Q

(in reply to junecleaver)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: Sissy Men - 9/4/2009 5:13:33 AM   
naughty2pls


Posts: 9
Joined: 8/13/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: thishereboi

quote:

ORIGINAL: naughty2pls

I simply felt most connected to this submission man who is a part-time TV who truly enjoys being a sissy.   Looking back, after we made a connection he withdrew completely.  I in turn got outraged because of the lack of communication.
He is someone I would want to keep as a friend as I value him and enjoyed girlie shopping with him as well.  I cannot manage to get one sentence out of him and its all cold communication.

Funny how submissives offer the world when they don't know you other than online then once you get into the reality of it, everything changes.  That's when being Dominant becomes a true form of art. 


What I find funny, or maybe I should use the word sad, is when someone decides that all submissives are one way, because they have met some who are. So you consider being judgemental an art?



Great observation.
Being Judgemental has become a bad habit due to prior experience.
A habit I am forever trying to stop.
He is my first sissy boy, my first sub since I am new (read my profile)
and I became intrigued with.  I got a cold feedback after a great encounter
and didn't know how to handle it. I did not handle it the best I should
and came here for feedback.
Thank you all for it too

(in reply to thishereboi)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: Sissy Men - 9/4/2009 5:15:59 AM   
naughty2pls


Posts: 9
Joined: 8/13/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: allthatjaz


quote:

ORIGINAL: naughty2pls

quote:

ORIGINAL: allthatjaz


quote:

ORIGINAL: junecleaver

I've only dealt with one sissy sub and he was a pain in the ass.  When someone has a less mainstream fetish, there probability of being do-me raises significantly in my eyes.


Well thats not my experience. Some of the best subs I have had are sissy girls. I find them to be generally less inhibited.
I would certainly call 'sissy' main stream. You only have to look at the profiles on here to see that its one of the more common fetishes.

naughty2pls... I'm sorry this has happened and without talking to him directly its impossible to know his reasons.
Consider part of this could be fear. T-girls and sissies are great once they have embraced that other vital part of themselves but often have an inner emotional struggle when coming out. There is still a lot of prejudice and unacceptance towards these people even on boards such as this and on top of that he could be facing a lot of inner demons.
The other thing I have found (more so with T-girls) is that when they first come out they are often over sensitive to comments. Its as though they are looking for your unacceptance in some way 'too good to be true' sort of stuff.

I would be tempted to write to him and tell him that you are trying to understand the lack of communication but you just want him to know that you will always be there as a friend.



Thank you for your kind offer but I will pass.
If I am going thru all this in the beginning, imagine what I am going to be dealt with if I continue this path with him. 



I'm sorry my answer was not what you wanted!. If you have all ready decided to move along because your not prepared to continue this path then why ask the question in the first place?


I greatly appreciate all your feedback
I've accepted and will move on to my next sissy boy I encounter.
I hope to have learnt something from this experience to better it in the future.
Thank  you all again for the feedback

(in reply to allthatjaz)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: Sissy Men - 9/4/2009 5:16:01 AM   
allthatjaz


Posts: 2878
Joined: 8/20/2008
Status: offline 		I am friends with Sarah Jane. Sarah Jane is a a beautiful T-girl who would put most women to shame. She's the most amazing submissive too and fussy with it about who she bows to.
I remember Sarah Jane when she first came out. Her mixed emotions of anguish, joy, fear, excitement and despair.
Sarah Jane had been brought up in a family where men were supposed to be men, she worked as a long distance lorry driver and ate most of her meals in truck drivers caffs. She married young when her girlfriend fell pregnant and she hid her desire to taste life as a woman for many long years. She knew that if anyone found out she would be mocked, scorned, ridiculed, laughed at and worst of all that she would be rejected by her family.
Sarah Janes tried to commit suicide on numerous occasions. She was treated for depression and at one point took psychiatric help.
When Sarah Jane through caution to the wind and came out she was terrified but she soon made friends and other people that had been through the same shit as herself. Bit by bit she found a reason for living and started to embrace who she was.

I am so privileged to be a friend of Sarah Janes. I saw her get a lot of using on her journey into womanhood and I saw her go through a lot of heartache too but it was me that saw her blossom into the beautiful person she is today and it was worth every minute of the time I invested into that friendship.

_____________________________

S&M (Steve and Maria) persona libre de convencionalismos


Fan of edgeplay.co.uk

(in reply to allthatjaz)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: Sissy Men - 9/4/2009 5:25:34 AM   
VanIsleKnight


Posts: 283
Joined: 8/4/2009
Status: offline 		Question.  What's a sissy boy?

My Mistress said that she loved shaved sissy boys, but I haven't any clue what that is.  I was about to ask her about it but, er... distractions happened and I haven't gotten a chance to ask yet.


_____________________________

Apologies for what you feel might be a spelling error. I'm Canadian.

(in reply to allthatjaz)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: Sissy Men - 9/4/2009 7:23:08 AM   
OttersSwim


Posts: 2860
Joined: 9/1/2008
Status: offline 		Sissy boys are typically highly effeminate males who often dress in over the top frilly, lacey, poofy dresses, maids outfits, etc.

Some use the term "sissy" to describe all submissive males who identify as having a female side that they wish to express.  I don't agree with the term used in this fashion, but am not so up in arms about it that I want to start another topic or anything. 

Many of these folk identify as hetero males, though many are bisexual as well.

Because of the social stigma, as allthatjaz so eloquently pointed out, it can take a while for a person to really come out and shine.  Thus, there is a pretty significant track record of Dommes encountering sissies who were still in process of coming out, or were simply in the "useless" stage of obsession with their kink.  It is very easy to become so stuffed up with this that it is all you think about, talk about, etc. 

EDIT:  To the OP.  I am sorry you had a communications issue with this person.  I am sad that you are choosing to move on as I feel this adds to the "negative aura" that femme boys have in general.  There are girlie boys out there who are serious about service to a Lady and I hope you will someday have a positive encounter with someone else who is en'femme.

< Message edited by OttersSwim -- 9/4/2009 7:32:40 AM >

_____________________________

I am on a journey of authenticity and self.

(in reply to VanIsleKnight)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: Sissy Men - 9/4/2009 7:32:37 AM   
DesFIP


Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline 		The fact that you identify as dominant and him as submissive have nothing to do with his inability to communicate.
Take sex out of it.

You require a partner who can hold open and honest communication. He isn't capable of it.

Therefore he isn't compatible. If he wants to keep up a friendship with you, then it's up to him.
Next time check for communication ability first as well as anything else that's important to you.

_____________________________

Slave to laundry

Cynical and proud of it!


(in reply to OttersSwim)
Profile   Post #: 20
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