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RE: A moment of epiphany or a constant knowing? - 9/15/2009 5:23:54 AM

porcelaine

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quote:

ORIGINAL: lally2

having said that, it was an important process in of itself, it gave me the confidence next time to actually know that in submission i still remain constant within myself, simply that the submission i give to another is a mindful process and we dont dissappear as people.

sometimes the simplest things are complicated in our minds needlessly. we are vessels. in order to use the vessel properly the contents must be emptied. and the vessel cleansed of impurities before anything can be placed inside. the master is the wine. what he imparts are based upon his beliefs, experiences, and knowledge. he cannot place anything inside of her that he does not possess within himself or goes to obtain.

however, there's the second side of this - the core. this is what is left behind after all the contents have been removed. this is her essence. the real you without the layers and self inflicted limitations heaped upon you. it is the real person hiding underneath. i believe michelangelo said it best...

“i saw the angel in the marble and carved until i set him free.”
“the best artist has that thought alone which is contained within the marble shell; the sculptor’s hand can only break the spell to free the figures slumbering in the stone.”

this is where a lot of misconception comes in. if you can wrap your mind around those words and truly grasp what he's saying and apply it to your submission and/or slavery. you'll come to see how easy this really is. it is only made complicated by our unwillingness to see and accept what is simple. your awakening can occur at the master's hand or by some other method. but only when you're truly ready to be freed.

porcelaine

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RE: A moment of epiphany or a constant knowing? - 9/15/2009 1:23:31 PM

slaveToKnight

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Wow..thank you, sorry you had to go through so much pain to get where you are now but I suppose those are the times we grow in ourselves too.

(in reply to Aileen1968)

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RE: A moment of epiphany or a constant knowing? - 9/15/2009 1:27:18 PM

slaveToKnight

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Nearly three years now and this aspect of our relationship has been developing for the last year.

The only area he does not control is that of my children and how I bring them up, although he does offer his opinion and advice as needed and asked for.

Yes it has taken time to get to this point and I know there is much more to go.

(in reply to DesFIP)

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RE: A moment of epiphany or a constant knowing? - 9/15/2009 1:29:27 PM

slaveToKnight

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quote:

ORIGINAL: slaveluci

quote:

ORIGINAL: slaveToKnight
I recently had what I can only describe as an epiphany and released that I am ready to let go of any wants, needs and expectations that I still had remaining.

I don't believe this is possible. As long as you are a living, breathing human being, you are going to have "wants, needs and expectations." That's just a fact. They may have completely changed or diminished or been suppressed but you still have them and so does everyone else. Trying to convince yourself otherwise, IMHO, can only lead to trouble.

I've enjoyed what others have related here and I absolutely believe it's possible to meet someone and desire right at that very instant to relinquish control to them. It happens and it works for some. I also agree with DesFip in that I'm not sure how realistic or sane it is to meet someone today and immediately turn over all control of everything in your life to them at that instant. That probably doesn't happen so much and, if it does, may not always be the wisest course of action esp. where children and money and other such things are involved.

Bottom line for me is that I can give up all the control I want as effortlessly as I can and that's great. But that's NEVER going to mean I'll never again have any "wants, needs or expectations." You're always expecting something even if it's that you're going to get nothing..............luci

Thank you, you gave me a lot to think about. Perhaps I should have put "to let go of my need to assert my wants, needs and expectations."

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RE: A moment of epiphany or a constant knowing? - 9/15/2009 6:33:05 PM

Andalusite

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slaveToKnight, my Master *wants* me to express my wants and needs (although I try to do so respectfully, and will certainly take "no" or "later" for an answer on the wants). He has ordered me to communicate with him, he *wants* me to be emotionally transparent, and he can't read my mind. We're still a fairly new couple - we started dating 5 months ago, and he became my owner 3 months ago. There are some aspects that I'm still working toward yielding control over, and some areas that he has no interest in micro-managing. I didn't have an abstract urge or need to turn over the reins to somebody, he specifically inspires my trust, and makes me feel like an extension of his body and will. It's very *difficult* for me to say no or truly resist anything he desires from me. That doesn't always mean that submitting and yielding to him is always easy, but I struggle with myself, with my limitations, not against him.

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RE: A moment of epiphany or a constant knowing? - 9/16/2009 4:52:03 AM

DesFIP

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Sorry, but I still need to assert my wants, needs etc. Meaning if I don't tell him, they certainly won't happen. If I hadn't told him how bad I was feeling yesterday, then he wouldn't have told me to take two Tylenol PMs and go to bed at 8:30PM.

He won't know if I'm getting irritable because I haven't eaten all day unless I tell him. Et cetera.

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RE: A moment of epiphany or a constant knowing? - 9/16/2009 5:34:55 AM

RavenMuse

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quote:

ORIGINAL: slaveToKnight
Thank you, you gave me a lot to think about. Perhaps I should have put "to let go of my need to assert my wants, needs and expectations."

OK now I'm one of those who expect the girl to jump 'in at the deep end', I accept nothing less than total control/Authority from the moment of submission. she either trusts in Me to handle all areas rationally and with care or she doesn't trust Me enough to sustain/progress the kind of relationship I build.

HOWEVER.... she certainly has needs. I am responsible for this relationship, for a relationship to be sustainable then it has to cover the needs of everyone in the relationship... if they could function efficiently without it then it would be a want not a need! That doesn't mean it will be handled the way they think it will and certainly not when they think it will but at somepoint in the relationship each need will be addressed and fulfilled in the way I choose to do so.

Wants, everyone has wants. I demand to know what My girls wants are.... some I may indulge if it suits Me, others I may flatly rule out as ever going to happen and yet others I may tease, toy, deny and just maybe very occasionally permit. Knowing her wants is part of knowing her, how can I control something that I don't understand. she isn't allowed to keep such information from Me, I require her to share it.... I am good, but I am not a mind reader.

Expectations. she can expect that at core I remain the same Man she learned to trust in and submit too.... That includes as I said above, that I will take into account the needs of ALL My household (Whoa betide her if she EVER tries to present a want as a need in order to get it... she knows not to try that sort of manipulation!). That is it for expectations. she can have all the wants in the world, just don't expect Me to indulge them... maybe I will, maybe I won't, don't EXPECT either as you don't KNOW until I tell you!

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This above all: to thine own self be true,
And it must follow, as the night the day,
Thou canst not then be false to any man.

Owner of metalmiss

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RE: A moment of epiphany or a constant knowing? - 9/16/2009 9:36:09 PM

sweetsub1957

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~Fast Reply~
I've always felt submissive, but it was a matter of finding the right Dominant.....the One I could really trust totally, so I could "slowly let go of the need to hold on" to most things. I find I am letting go of control in most things, but still hanging on to wants/needs such as needing to be loved in my intimate relationship, which He does. That will always be a need of mine, no matter how much I trust Him and let go of control.

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"That's not just a chip on her shoulder, that's the whole potato!" ~Lady Angelika~

In lowering yourself to talking behind my back, you're perfectly positioned to kiss my ass.

An it harm none, do what ye wilt.

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