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RE: Is your attraction always kinky? - 9/15/2009 5:46:11 PM   
littlewonder


Posts: 15659
Status: offline 		It's more a reaction these days of "he's hot...but Master Master is hotter" :)

When I see a handsome man I just think he's hot to look at but that's about as far as it goes in my head. I don't think about how wet it would get for him to beat me or anything like that. Then again I'm not really into "kink" so much as power.

(in reply to AAkasha)
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RE: Is your attraction always kinky? - 9/15/2009 7:05:16 PM   
AlexandraLynch


Posts: 778
Joined: 3/24/2008
Status: offline 		Part of someone's attractiveness to me is directly correlated to how they look naked on their knees. And yeah, I think about that when I look at people.



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RE: Is your attraction always kinky? - 9/15/2009 8:52:47 PM   
sweetsub1957


Posts: 2201
Joined: 4/28/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: sodsta

When you see an attractive person, is your first thought a kinky one? For example, if you're a dom/me, do you have a similar reaction to my friend up there? And likewise, if you're a sub, do you see a hot person and think "I'd quite like to be tied up/spanked/beaten/whatever by that person"?

Or is your reaction usually a more generic "they're hot"?

Thanks for any feedback. :)


-- Kye


The first thing I think is "Gee, s/he's nice looking" and then it's "I wonder what it'd be like to kiss him/her?"  Of course, if we start to talk and they're an idiot, that kills it right there.  And the nice-looking part is more than just looks, it's how they put themselves together, the person 'him/herself, and their sense of style and individuality, how they carry themselves, etc.  After the initial "Gee, s/he's nice looking" and wondering about the kiss, I think "I wonder if S/He's a Dominant?" and what they might be "into" because vanilla is not an option for me.  And of course, that's all just a fleeting thought, because I'm way massively happy with Sir and would never take anyone else seriously in that way.  I notice other people of course, but just in passing.

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RE: Is your attraction always kinky? - 9/15/2009 9:32:30 PM   
Elisabella


Posts: 3939
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: sodsta

I was talking to a dominant friend of mine yesterday and she said that when she sees an attractive person on the street or in a bar or wherever, her first thought is no longer just "wow, s/he's hot," but has turned into "I really want to tie hir and do nasty things to hir."

She said this immediate reaction to seeing an attractive person only came about as she began exploring her kinky side and became more and ore comfortable with it, and I was just wondering if this was common among kinky people.

When you see an attractive person, is your first thought a kinky one? For example, if you're a dom/me, do you have a similar reaction to my friend up there? And likewise, if you're a sub, do you see a hot person and think "I'd quite like to be tied up/spanked/beaten/whatever by that person"?

Or is your reaction usually a more generic "they're hot"?

Thanks for any feedback. :)


-- Kye


Definitely more a generic "they're hot" reaction. I only feel submissive toward a particular man when I also have the desire to be in a committed relationship with him, and while I can appreciate hotness in a stranger, seeing eye candy doesn't automatically make me want to be his girlfriend.

(in reply to sodsta)
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RE: Is your attraction always kinky? - 9/15/2009 9:36:32 PM   
Elisabella


Posts: 3939
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: AAkasha


Right.  At first as I was reading the responses, I was thinking, man, maybe I am a freak.  But seriously - when you FIRST see someone, and it's someone you probably won't meet or know or whatever, but you think they are "hot" - if you are going to have a little fantasy in your head, what's it about?


Kissing. Hot passionate kissing while I run my hands up his chest with my back to the wall.

I don't mean this question to be rude but does anyone here actually fantasize about full blown sex in these situations? IE seeing someone hot at the shops, or at a club? Does anyone imagine what it is like to have sex with that person?

(in reply to AAkasha)
Profile   Post #: 25
RE: Is your attraction always kinky? - 9/15/2009 9:48:54 PM   
MaamJay


Posts: 2101
Joined: 9/2/2005
Status: offline 		I'm not that into the whole "hot" thing though I do recognise "cold" when I see it! However, Master and I are both people watchers, so we quite frequently eye off butts we'd like to spank, and He's always seeing more titties to tie up LOL! I sometimes think Master's heaven would be a line of fullbreasted women and a bloody long rope. And we do like to watch interactions between couples and surmise who might be D/s or at least, who wears the pants in that family. I need to get to know (and like) someone a bit before I start seriously speculating as to their subby nature and then the fantasies do get under way. Like My friend in the music shop whom Master jokingly refers to as My boyfriend LOL! Oh I wish! But dammit, he got back together with his ex!

Maam Jay aka violet[A]

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RE: Is your attraction always kinky? - 9/15/2009 10:46:46 PM   
Aanakaris


Posts: 310
Joined: 4/8/2008
Status: offline 		My first thought may be, "She's attractive/cute/pretty." but the second usually is, "I wonder if she likes to be spanked?"

Part of being Dominant is having an active imagination, so in short order I may be imagining exactly what she looks like naked, hands bound behind her back, and over my knee.


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I like nonsense, it wakes up the brain cells. Fantasy is a necessary ingredient in living, It's a way of looking at life through the wrong end of a telescope. Which is what I do, And that enables you to laugh at life's realities.
-- Dr. Seuss

(in reply to MaamJay)
Profile   Post #: 27
RE: Is your attraction always kinky? - 9/16/2009 4:17:00 AM   
DesFIP


Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline 		I admire others aesthetically but I am not sexually attracted to others while in a good relationship. In other words, I do not lust in my mind.

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Profile   Post #: 28
RE: Is your attraction always kinky? - 9/16/2009 6:59:56 AM   
someguy335


Posts: 12
Joined: 8/23/2009
Status: offline 		Considering that I'm pretty secretive about what I do in the bedroom, sometimes I do see ordinary people and wonder things like "Hmm... I wonder if she likes getting tied up in the bedroom" or "She looks like the kind of girl that looks like being controlled" or whatever.  More often than not this is when I'm at a store or restaurant, probably because the people are serving me, ha!

(in reply to AAkasha)
Profile   Post #: 29
RE: Is your attraction always kinky? - 9/16/2009 8:42:26 AM   
slavekal


Posts: 1486
Joined: 7/20/2004
Status: offline 		Always. I don't crave pure vanilla ever. I am only interested in dominant women.

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(in reply to sodsta)
Profile   Post #: 30
RE: Is your attraction always kinky? - 9/16/2009 1:53:38 PM   
Wheldrake


Posts: 477
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: sodsta

When you see an attractive person, is your first thought a kinky one? For example, if you're a dom/me, do you have a similar reaction to my friend up there? And likewise, if you're a sub, do you see a hot person and think "I'd quite like to be tied up/spanked/beaten/whatever by that person"?

Or is your reaction usually a more generic "they're hot"?


This one made me think a bit. As a straight male, I can definitely enjoy looking at women. However, I don't really think about what I might do with them, or (as a submissive) what they might do to me - as a few others have said, it's simply a matter of aesthetics, and of noticing and appreciating certain qualities.

With that said, being submissive does affect the range of qualities I notice. Naturally I can appreciate a nicely sculpted figure, a friendly smile, and other "vanilla" characteristics. However, I also pay attention to traits that I associate with dominance. Several times a day (I live in a pretty crowded city) I do catch myself thinking something like, "she looks hot". However, I also catch myself thinking things like, "she looks tough", or "wow, I'll bet she could swing a paddle hard", or "she has an air of command about her". Quite often the women who trigger these thoughts aren't ones that I find particularly attractive in the vanilla sense, but they're the ones who really catch my attention.

Of course, it goes without saying that visual impressions can be misleading, and I'm sure that 90% of the women who push my buttons in this casual way would have absolutely no interest in paddling anything other than a canoe (if even that). Equally, I'm sure there are a lot of delightfully terrifying, sadistic dominants whom I would pass on the street without a second glance. But still, the presence of women who look sort of dominant does make walking around the city more aesthetically congenial.

(in reply to sodsta)
Profile   Post #: 31
RE: Is your attraction always kinky? - 9/16/2009 2:25:04 PM   
littlesarbonn


Posts: 1710
Joined: 12/3/2005
From: Stockton, California
Status: offline 		My first thought is like most guys. I think "wow, she's hot." I don't even think kink, unless she's at a SM club beating someone. But she can win me over in a second by then telling me she wants to dominate me. Right at that moment, the kink really becomes hot for me.

Kind of strange that way.


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RE: Is your attraction always kinky? - 9/16/2009 2:44:51 PM   
lateralist1


Posts: 886
Joined: 11/22/2006
Status: offline 		What do you mean by kinky?
I don't have relationships that don't involve D/s agreed or otherwise.
I don't have relationships that don't involve discipline agreed or otherwise.
I'm rarely interested in anyone until I am convinced I can dominate them.
Once I have complete authority then my interest may grow.
If my interest becomes sexual then I will start to think about bondage and S/m.
Why would I even think of having sex with someone who doesn't want to do everything I tell them to?

(in reply to Wheldrake)
Profile   Post #: 33
RE: Is your attraction always kinky? - 9/16/2009 3:11:58 PM   
delonval


Posts: 4
Joined: 8/10/2009
Status: offline 		sodsta's op is in reference to a conversation he and i had the other day, and i, too, started to think i must be a freak after reading many of the initial responses. i'm glad i'm not the only one! :)

the little fantasy in my head during that first rush of attraction is very similar - what does s/he look like on hir back with hir wrists tied to the headboard? on hir knees with hir arms behind her back? will s/he shake? blush? meet my eye?

regardless of what happens, the imagery always provides a little thrill.

(in reply to AAkasha)
Profile   Post #: 34
RE: Is your attraction always kinky? - 9/16/2009 8:56:55 PM   
Elipsis


Posts: 301
Joined: 7/8/2009
Status: offline 		With me I usually get there pretty fast.  Furthermore being a switch I might look at one person and immediately think about being dominant whereas another person of a drastically different appearance might make me want to be submissive.

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Profile   Post #: 35
RE: Is your attraction always kinky? - 9/16/2009 9:02:08 PM   
pompeii


Posts: 934
Joined: 1/4/2007
From: Silicon Valley, San Jose, California
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: sodsta
When you see an attractive person, is your first thought a kinky one?


Mine is to make her my slave - put a collar on her neck and lead her about on a leash - and then to make her stand there at attention, hands above her head, skirt raised to reveal her mons pubis mound glistening just a bit with the dewey moisture - and then to take her as my own.

Slap! Slap! huh? Oh, ... sorry. Just daydreaming ...

(in reply to sodsta)
Profile   Post #: 36
RE: Is your attraction always kinky? - 9/16/2009 9:42:00 PM   
mbes


Posts: 465
Joined: 12/14/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Elisabella
I don't mean this question to be rude but does anyone here actually fantasize about full blown sex in these situations? IE seeing someone hot at the shops, or at a club? Does anyone imagine what it is like to have sex with that person?

~~raises hand sheepishly~~
Yes. I don't take the time to get a whole encounter in (usually) or anything, but genital-to-genital imaginings? It happens.
And he's always in a dominant position in my head.

(in reply to Elisabella)
Profile   Post #: 37
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