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SouthernSpankin -> RE: Married Men Seeking Assertive discreet play (9/16/2009 8:24:50 AM)
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quote:
ORIGINAL: threepointplay13
it wasn't like that originally. I developed this desire well into our relationship. I have talked and asked her, but she is very vanilla. Guess this was the wrong place to ask this question.
1) Yeah, I feel you, you developed this desire well into your marriage (after all, your profile, which you now deleted, said you were like 50). But what if, well into your marriage, you developed this health condition where you were no longer able to please your wife sexually? Would that be cool of her to just go around looking for someone else to satisfy her sexual needs without discussing it with you first?
2) Just because you talked to your wife about your desire and she's not into it doesn't mean she really isn't into it. She might have thought you weren't serious, which is not surprising, being that you developed this desire late in your life. But I know plenty of married male subs in your shoes (married for many years, developed their desire late in their lives) that got their wife interested in fulfilling their interests. And yeah, it most often took some work, like having the spouse read websites, articles, books on your interests (and they have many specific books, etc out there on the subject of one spouse introducing their BDSM interests to the other spouse)... and most often, even after the spouse agreed to it, it was awkward at first, but after time (often after just three or so attempts at it), it "clicked" for them. Really, your first question here should not be "how do I cheat on my wife" -- but "how do I introduce my wife to the idea of fulfilling my new sexual desires?"
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