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Bisexuality/Gay = Submissive? - 9/15/2009 11:04:17 AM   
Sunnyfey


Posts: 1436
Joined: 9/21/2007
From: OK
Status: offline 		In another thread there is a prevailing theme that Bi-sexuality (especially if the person is male and on the receiving end) equates to a submissive personality, or that bi-sexuality is some how "not Dominant"......I'm throwing in the gay aspect also because it seems to follow the same "logic".

what say you?


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RE: Bisexuality/Gay = Submissive? - 9/15/2009 11:09:31 AM   
chellekitty


Posts: 3923
Joined: 3/27/2005
Status: offline 		this thought is along the same lines that if you bottom (and in the gay world thats what being a bottom is) you must be submissive...and if you've been around long enough its been determined by most (not all) that a Dominant can bottom (recieve sensation)...

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RE: Bisexuality/Gay = Submissive? - 9/15/2009 11:11:26 AM   
LaTigresse


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Sunnyfey

In another thread there is a prevailing theme that Bi-sexuality (especially if the person is male and on the receiving end) equates to a submissive personality, or that bi-sexuality is some how "not Dominant"......I'm throwing in the gay aspect also because it seems to follow the same "logic".

what say you?



Narrow minds that cannot comprehend anything other than what exists in their own little box. I roll my eyes at their ignorance and move on.


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RE: Bisexuality/Gay = Submissive? - 9/15/2009 11:20:40 AM   
Acer49


Posts: 1434
Joined: 8/7/2009
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Sunnyfey

In another thread there is a prevailing theme that Bi-sexuality (especially if the person is male and on the receiving end) equates to a submissive personality, or that bi-sexuality is some how "not Dominant"......I'm throwing in the gay aspect also because it seems to follow the same "logic".

what say you?



Ones sexual preference has absolutely nothing to do with whether or not they are dominant or submissive. Do not confuse what is now called a "sissy" as to someone who may be gay or submissive

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RE: Bisexuality/Gay = Submissive? - 9/15/2009 11:21:03 AM   
Sunnyfey


Posts: 1436
Joined: 9/21/2007
From: OK
Status: offline 		I guess I just don't understand the thought process behind it.

When does sexuality come into play deciding if someone is or is not a D-type?


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RE: Bisexuality/Gay = Submissive? - 9/15/2009 11:21:22 AM   
marie2


Posts: 1690
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From: Jersey
Status: offline 		I think anyone of any sexuality can express dominance and or "be" dominant, however I also believe that those who identify as submissives have certain associations with certain things (be it sexuality, social status, demeanor, or whatever) that we may or may not respond to submissively or see as dominant.   And I think that's ok, and it shouldn't be taken personally..


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RE: Bisexuality/Gay = Submissive? - 9/15/2009 11:22:53 AM   
Sunnyfey


Posts: 1436
Joined: 9/21/2007
From: OK
Status: offline 		I'm not taking anything personally 

Just genuinely curious about the idea of it.


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RE: Bisexuality/Gay = Submissive? - 9/15/2009 11:22:57 AM   
RCdc


Posts: 8674
Status: offline 		Hello Sunny.
I got that vibe too... I was asking on the other thread whilst you have posted this!
I also get the vibe of distrust as well.
I do not understand either.

the.dark.

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RE: Bisexuality/Gay = Submissive? - 9/15/2009 11:27:06 AM   
BKSir


Posts: 4037
Joined: 4/8/2008
From: Salt Lake City, UT
Status: offline 		Wuh?  O.o
LOL, I'm actually kind of confused by the question alone.  I guess that's because I'm a gay D-type.  Although, by that, I guess I mean I'm a sub... or something...  *shrug*  Guess I better go let the pet know about this.  He'll be rather disappointed I think.  ;)


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RE: Bisexuality/Gay = Submissive? - 9/15/2009 11:28:06 AM   
leadership527


Posts: 5026
Joined: 6/2/2008
Status: offline 		That line of thinking would not match my understanding of dominance or submission. To the best of my understanding, D/s is nothing more than a decision making strategy. Anything which doesn't involved the making of decisions is not relevant.

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I didn't so much "enslave" Carol as I did "enlove" her. - Me
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RE: Bisexuality/Gay = Submissive? - 9/15/2009 11:38:35 AM   
marie2


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From: Jersey
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quote:

ORIGINAL: leadership527

That line of thinking would not match my understanding of dominance or submission. To the best of my understanding, D/s is nothing more than a decision making strategy. Anything which doesn't involved the making of decisions is not relevant.


In a bottom line kind of way this is true, but the thing is that most ds relationships involve sex, so it would make sense (to me anyway) that oftentimes, if not most of the time,  people's ds and sexuality lines intertwine and overlap.  For instance, being a straight female, I would not enter into a ds relationship where I submit to a gay male. 

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RE: Bisexuality/Gay = Submissive? - 9/15/2009 11:41:28 AM   
leadership527


Posts: 5026
Joined: 6/2/2008
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quote:

ORIGINAL: marie2
In a bottom line kind of way this is true, but the thing is that most ds relationships involve sex, so it would make sense (to me anyway) that oftentimes, if not most of the time,  people's ds and sexuality lines intertwine and overlap.  For instance, being a straight female, I would not enter into a ds relationship where I submit to a gay male. 
*nods* Of course. I completely agree. It is certainly true that love and sex and dominance are all entangled in my own heart. So I could never be involved with a lesbian submissive. But I'd still see her as submissive, just not "for me".


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~Jeff

I didn't so much "enslave" Carol as I did "enlove" her. - Me
I want a joyous, loving, respectful relationship where the male is in charge and deserves to be. - DavanKael

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RE: Bisexuality/Gay = Submissive? - 9/15/2009 11:42:25 AM   
Sunnyfey


Posts: 1436
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From: OK
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: marie2

quote:

ORIGINAL: leadership527

That line of thinking would not match my understanding of dominance or submission. To the best of my understanding, D/s is nothing more than a decision making strategy. Anything which doesn't involved the making of decisions is not relevant.


In a bottom line kind of way this is true, but the thing is that most ds relationships involve sex, so it would make sense (to me anyway) that oftentimes, if not most of the time,  people's ds and sexuality lines intertwine and overlap.  For instance, being a straight female, I would not enter into a ds relationship where I submit to a gay male. 



Random note: granted we had no sexual play, but I once bottomed to a gay male. It was HOT as hell. One of the BEST scenes I have ever had....I happily went home and boinked the shit out of my partner. Apparently so did the Dom. Fun was had all around. Good times


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RE: Bisexuality/Gay = Submissive? - 9/15/2009 11:47:36 AM   
marie2


Posts: 1690
Joined: 11/4/2008
From: Jersey
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: leadership527

quote:

ORIGINAL: marie2
In a bottom line kind of way this is true, but the thing is that most ds relationships involve sex, so it would make sense (to me anyway) that oftentimes, if not most of the time,  people's ds and sexuality lines intertwine and overlap.  For instance, being a straight female, I would not enter into a ds relationship where I submit to a gay male. 
*nods* Of course. I completely agree. It is certainly true that love and sex and dominance are all entangled in my own heart. So I could never be involved with a lesbian submissive. But I'd still see her as submissive, just not "for me".



Gotcha.  I didn't mean to state the ridiculously obvious, but I guess I did. 

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RE: Bisexuality/Gay = Submissive? - 9/15/2009 11:48:35 AM   
OttersSwim


Posts: 2860
Joined: 9/1/2008
Status: offline 		Just a fast reply...I know a dominant bisexual male personally...he is about as far from submissive as you can get.  He is not girly, nor effeminate in -any- way.

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RE: Bisexuality/Gay = Submissive? - 9/15/2009 12:11:36 PM   
Mercnbeth


Posts: 11766
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Sunnyfey

I guess I just don't understand the thought process behind it.

When does sexuality come into play deciding if someone is or is not a D-type?



this slave would guess that it's when one's sexuality is the be-all end-all of one's s-type-ness.

< Message edited by Mercnbeth -- 9/15/2009 12:13:41 PM >

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RE: Bisexuality/Gay = Submissive? - 9/15/2009 12:12:43 PM   
Sunnyfey


Posts: 1436
Joined: 9/21/2007
From: OK
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Mercnbeth

this slave would guess that it's when sexuality is the be-all end-all of your s-type-ness.


That is a very good point that I did not think of.


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RE: Bisexuality/Gay = Submissive? - 9/15/2009 12:14:06 PM   
Lashra


Posts: 4900
Joined: 2/9/2006
Status: offline 		Sexual orientation has nothing to do with one being Dominant, submissive or a switch. Some people believe this because they simply do not understand gays or bi folk. Many people believe that a man who is gay must be submissive, otherwise he would not allow another man to have his way with him. I am sure there are plenty of leather Daddies who do not feel the least bit submissive and would not be shy about telling people so.

This is just another one of those ridiculous ideas that popped into someones brain and spread.

~Lashra

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RE: Bisexuality/Gay = Submissive? - 9/15/2009 12:25:03 PM   
Mercnbeth


Posts: 11766
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Sunnyfey

quote:

ORIGINAL: Mercnbeth

this slave would guess that it's when sexuality is the be-all end-all of your s-type-ness.


That is a very good point that I did not think of.



this slave got the idea from the "Talking With Vanilla Friends" thread.
 
there are many folks that perceive their "s"-or-"D"-"type"-ness as purely sexual.

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RE: Bisexuality/Gay = Submissive? - 9/15/2009 12:34:03 PM   
pyroaquatic


Posts: 1535
Joined: 12/4/2006
From: Pyroaquatica
Status: offline 		and just because you like getting fucked in the ass does not mean you are submissive.



We have some strange friends don't we?

yes, yes we do.


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You are what your deep, driving desire is.
As your desire is, so is your will.
As your will is, so is your deed.
As your deed is, so is your destiny.
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