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RE: Hating Nudity - 9/20/2009 6:36:28 AM

DesFIP

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quote:

ORIGINAL: hlen5
One of the reasons I'd like to get some land out in the country is to be able to be nude outside if I wish.

Just gives the mosquitoes more places to bite. No mosquitoes at the beach.

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RE: Hating Nudity - 9/20/2009 7:55:39 AM

puella

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Well, I must say it is interesting reading the replies and it does give me much to think about.

As for myself, I really do not see it as a textile dependency thing or driven by some sort of need to hide who I am....I do not like being naked even when I am alone... and I hear ya smilezz (and its lovely to see you too!) that it did not get better for me either when I lost a lot of weight, it heightened the problem and is not at a raging all time high, which I cannot figure out either.... I am still wondering if there is some way to work oneself out of this awful awful ... dunno what you would call its, it's almost like a defect or something...

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RE: Hating Nudity - 9/20/2009 8:06:28 AM

RavenMuse

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When it is based on self body image it is easier to deal with.... Seriously there is no chance in hell that I look better naked than the OP (Waves hi to puella) and if Me being naked doesn't bother Me then she hasn't anything to worry about on that score.

If it is more an irrational fear/loathing then it is much harder... by the very nature of being irrational, it can't be addressed by logic

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RE: Hating Nudity - 9/20/2009 9:52:08 AM

Mercnbeth

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quote:

...If you love being naked... why, and have you always...

LOVE being naked...have no idea why, but always have...(except for in the direct sunlight for more than 5 minutes without sunblock!!!)

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RE: Hating Nudity - 9/20/2009 9:54:08 AM

lovingpet

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I have had two meltdowns on the boards over this issue in the past 6 months or so and I am sure some do remember those. LOL The issue came up strongly when I was facing playing at a club for the first time. I had partners insistent on the fact that I would be naked. The first one fell flat and the other did, in fact, happen though I cannot say it happened gracefully.

I can't say I don't like being naked. On days I have the house to myself, I can easily take all day long getting around to getting dressed and I am perfectly comfortable with that. Nudity in an intimate setting brings me a great deal of shrinking and nervous blushing. Nudity at the doctor's office leaves me feeling rather exposed and somehow in a low position of power, so I always ask to talk to the doctor fully clothed before and after the examination. Nudity in about any other setting is just flat out scary and I have avoided it at all costs.

It doesn't help that I am a big gal. Goodness knows that in this overall culture, judgements abound and it is not the ideal of beautiful. I despise that kind of presumptive conclusions and I have enough past baggage to really find it hard to not be beautiful to someone (and by consequence, I feel not beautiful to everyone I encounter). I really don't like eyes upon me that might be thinking in these negative ways and I always seem to assume that they are. Oddly enough, I have never seen anyone naked and had those kinds of reactions myself. I find it beautiful, vulnerable, natural and the like.

The terror factor for me was the fact that I was being required to be nude in public. This was related to past trauma that I will not get into here, but sufficed to say I was in a desperate panic trying to handle the situation. My partner did so well supporting me through it all and it was something that only helped us grow stronger, but I know I am a long way from being comfortable in such a situation. We will probably go through this many more times.

It is a sad thing that many of us have come to be less than comfortable in our natural state. I don't know why we do this to ourselves and each other. We take on the values and criticisms of other with regard to our very own bodies. When eyes are upon us, somehow the weight of their biases, lusts, and opinions lay upon us. We judge ourselves by others' standards and it tears at our self confidence. It makes no sense and doesn't fit with how most of us conduct other parts of our life. It is such an intimate thing and goes deep in its harm. I hope to come to some peace about my own body with the outside world and even with myself and my own harsh judgements about it. I wish that for others who struggle in this department as well. I know it's not easy.

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RE: Hating Nudity - 9/20/2009 10:07:54 AM

Mercnbeth

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quote:

... I don't know why we do this to ourselves and each other...

so we can prop up the cosmetic & the diet (weight-loss) industry. they need our support (attitude & $$$) if they are going to continue to make huge amounts of cash based on folks' insecurities and body image "issues".

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RE: Hating Nudity - 9/20/2009 10:10:33 AM

puella

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I don't know RavenMuse... I am sure hoping I can apply some sort of rationality to this problem and just get it fixed... I like to think not all hope is lost, just yet!

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RE: Hating Nudity - 9/20/2009 10:30:54 AM

RavenMuse

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Once you can find the trigger (Given I think We can rule out just bodyimage) then hopefully it will make sense and can be addressed. Irrational fear is only irrational until you find the causal trigger

Hope you can find it sweetie.

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RE: Hating Nudity - 9/20/2009 11:03:09 AM

subtlebutterfly

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I'm thinking we could all join....

tadada da da daaaaaaaaa

the 'How to look good naked' reality tv shows!

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RE: Hating Nudity - 9/20/2009 11:05:48 AM

puella

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You are out of your fucking mind! lol

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RE: Hating Nudity - 9/20/2009 11:09:22 AM

rideemwet

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quote:

ORIGINAL: hlen5

I love being naked in private. I used to go to a womans' retreat that was clothing optional. I loved walking in the sunshine with just the sun on my back. I haven't been in a nude mixed group, don't know how that would be for me. I do know that I have body image issues.

One of the reasons I'd like to get some land out in the country is to be able to be nude outside if I wish.

Certainly an advantage of land in the country is not worrying about closing the drapes (or even having drapes) while wandering through the house undressed. Outside though? Sunburn, insects, tall grass and brush, bumping into things ... no thanks - maybe I'm just clumsy LOL

OK, I have run out to the barn in the middle of the night during foaling season or with colicy horses in very little, but that was just not wanting to wake up enough to dress.

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RE: Hating Nudity - 9/20/2009 11:11:25 AM

DesFIP

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Better if we all go on a group trip to Brazil. Apparently everyone wears those string bikinis with thong bottoms, including the overweight older crowd. We'd all fit right in and since nobody else was upset, we would get calmer about it ourselves.

February is my ideal choice for a vacation. By then you think winter will never end and need the sun.

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RE: Hating Nudity - 9/20/2009 11:13:06 AM

puella

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...wonders when everyone turned into a fucking Sadist around here, sheesh!

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RE: Hating Nudity - 9/20/2009 11:13:28 AM

subtlebutterfly

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brazil..in february?
I'M IN!!!!!

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RE: Hating Nudity - 9/20/2009 11:19:24 AM

puella

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I'll just bring my summer-weight burka, shall I? hehe

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RE: Hating Nudity - 9/20/2009 11:34:11 AM

subtlebutterfly

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might accept ya wearin one of those hula skirts

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RE: Hating Nudity - 9/20/2009 12:03:36 PM

Toppingfrmbottom

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I've never seen that show, I recorded it once and then never bothered to get around to watching it. What besides the premise of looking better naked, did the show actually do, how did he propose you look better naked?

quote:

ORIGINAL: subtlebutterfly

I'm thinking we could all join....

tadada da da daaaaaaaaa

the 'How to look good naked' reality tv shows!

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RE: Hating Nudity - 9/20/2009 12:06:34 PM

hlen5

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quote:

ORIGINAL: FelineFae

Nudity equals honesty, imho.

Clothing is a very useful tool for human kind. We can use it to express who we are, or to pretend to be something or someone else. Some people put great care and thought into what they wear, considering the effect each artical of clothing will have on those that see it. We communicate with it.

So, in the absence of this, what is left? When stripped of all this textile propoganda, who is this person?

i love the oppernity to be nude, provided i'm with people that i don't mind seeing me for me.

Great Post!!

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RE: Hating Nudity - 9/20/2009 12:17:04 PM

hlen5

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Toppingfrmbottom

I've never seen that show, I recorded it once and then never bothered to get around to watching it. What besides the premise of looking better naked, did the show actually do, how did he propose you look better naked?
quote:

ORIGINAL: subtlebutterfly

I'm thinking we could all join....

tadada da da daaaaaaaaa

the 'How to look good naked' reality tv shows!

I've watched it and the point was to get people to stop being so critical of themselves. When one has confidence it comes through. Other than those people who are truly prejudiced against people who aren't "10's", I think it works. At the end they do a photo shoot that they then put on a billboard and take the subject (guest?) to so they can see people reacting positively to their nude bodies (with the pertinent bits draped, of course).

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RE: Hating Nudity - 9/20/2009 12:21:57 PM

subtlebutterfly

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Toppingfrmbottom

I've never seen that show, I recorded it once and then never bothered to get around to watching it. What besides the premise of looking better naked, did the show actually do, how did he propose you look better naked?
quote:

ORIGINAL: subtlebutterfly

I'm thinking we could all join....

tadada da da daaaaaaaaa

the 'How to look good naked' reality tv shows!

Most women don't like being nude because they're unhappy with their body and most don't see their body the way it is in reality.
The aim is to dispel the illusions and show them that they're much more critical of their own body than of others.
A popular thing there is having women of different sizes line up and the woman in question is supposed to situate herself between the women where she thinks she fits. The result is that she usually thinks she's a couple of sizes bigger than she really is.

It's a matter of helping the women feeling happy in their own skin, along with teaching them how to dress as to embrace their body, what makes them look fatter than they are what compliments their bust, ass whatever their best asset is etc.

If you feel comfortable in your own skin and are embrace your body you are usually able to deliver that feeling to the ones that see you, naked or otherwise.

< Message edited by subtlebutterfly -- 9/20/2009 12:28:23 PM >

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