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ORIGINAL: IrishMist

What do I deserve? Nothing. There is no contract at the beginning of life which entitles me to anything. Not love, not caring, not being treated well...absolutly nothing.

The love and caring I receive from others is earned through the actions that I perform each and every day. The day I stop performing those same actions is the day that that love and caring is removed. I am entitled to nothing. I deserve nothing. I earn everything. And I am more than ok with that.

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You are wrong

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ORIGINAL: bluefireeyez

i was always brought up to believe someone doesn't "deserve" anything. They either earn it or they don't.

Deserve makes me think of priviliged. Why do I have food and kids in Africa die? They don't deserve it because they didn't earn it? The homeless in my city do not earn their shelter/meals, yet I do think they deserve both. I am not criticizing what you wrote, to me there is just more to this. I am with IrishMist on this one: I deserve nothing; added: not if the world is not able to extend that to everyone else as well.

my Master keeps telling me i deserve certain things ie success, happiness, to be treated well etc etc.

Sure, if he provides those things, he can make that promise. There are many external factors that can stand in the way. Even if I work hard to get into grad school I might not get accepted because there are more students than spots. Do I deserve it, yes, but so do the others. I have no control over who gets in, only over how I present myself at an interview.
 
Define therefore success. Happiness is a choice despite the circumstances? And to be treated well, maybe I deserve that, but there is no guarantee. And if people don't, then I 'deserve' it/owe it to myself to walk away (or to discuss why they don't).

When i told Him i didn't agree He asked me why and questioned my definition of deserve and earn...asking me if i earn some thing then shouldn't i deserve it? i don't think so, i earned it. Deserving to me is similar to entitlement. Once you "deserve" some thing you always should. Whereas to earn some thing means that you need to continue the actions you previously displayed to continue getting it.

When I think I deserve something, I become attached to it, and want to hold on to it. Then I disregard change. What helps me is to distinguish between needs and wants. As already referred to above, there are many in this world who do not have their most basic need met, yet in my eyes, everyone deserves at least that.
 
When I pay my taxes, I am entitled to government services etc, to a pension, when I have build that up. But the government also gives a small pension to those who never paid taxes, e.g. to homemakers. They did not earn it. Do they deserve it?
 
In The Netherlands the pension funds now start to shorten pensioners... they deserve to be paid out in full, they are entitled to it after 40 years of labour, yet they have no control over this. Life is not fair.

i'm just not sold on the idea that someone deserves some thing because they earned it once. You won't keep deserving a paycheck for years if you only go to work one day.

Capitalism in a nut shell.

Sooo, my question is...(i think, sorry it's been a long day)...how do you define deserve vs. earn and are the two exclusive or do they interact?

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ORIGINAL: spookyfe

everyone deserves to feel happy and to be treated well.  we also then deserve treat rewards for good behaviour on top of this.
my master says the ame i deserve happiness


Good. Trust him.

I wish you well,
~Zevar~


How does the wink relate to your words?

_____________________________

I object to violence because when it appears to do good, the good is only temporary; the evil it does is permanent. -Mahatma Gandhi

Never Explain — your Friends do not need it and your Enemies will not believe you anyway. -Elbert Hubbard

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ORIGINAL: worthlesstrash

I deserve to be safe and have my basic needs met. At least that is what I believe I deserve. I have pretty much gotten over the idea that I deserve to be happy in life, it's just not in the cards. I will leave what else I deserve up to him, honestly..it's not my decision to make.

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ORIGINAL: Bimtrain

You are wrong. I see you're American and operating under the assumption you were born here that means your were born with legal citizenship. American citizenship includes inalienable rights such as life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness. When your parents signed and filed your birth certificate they singed a contract that says you deserve these things.

Where can those new borns sign up to get what they deserve? Exchange that right for something tangible? All 3: right to life, liberty, and happiness are 'things' they will have to make for themselves (depending partly on the social economic standard of their parents, the state of the economy, even on place of birth, they might be able to achieve this in a more or less limited way.
 
A lot of those, all born with the same 'rights' never get out of the slums, never get any health insurance, never get a chance at decent post-secondary education.
 
And no, don't tell me that everyone can live the American dream (and agreed, some don't want to, and they live their American dream that way). Your system still depends on a pyramid shaped society: with the poor at the bottom and the rich at the top. Not everyone's effort gets rewarded as to what it's really worth (and that goes both ways: for poor and rich). Most jobs that enabled a family to live off one income in the 1960's don't do that anymore.

Our laws have also decided we have a right to education and if we get our shit together and join the rest of the western world we'll have the right to free healthcare as well. Our country believe we deserve these things until we violate its laws there for giving them up.

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ORIGINAL: Arpig

I deserve a pint of Cherry Garcia Damnit!!

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ORIGINAL: SnowRanger

LOL...  Well... moderte chuckle...   My training officer Meade breaks out punishment from play.  Not being one that is into pain; guess when I get the back of the hand!

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ORIGINAL: bluefireeyez

Thank your DesFIP, that is an interesting way to look at it. Perhaps that is exactly what He was trying to do and i completely missed it lol. It is true that He believes most people in my life are not healthy for me (a pretty accurate belief). So He is trying to build me up more than the others are trying to tear me down.