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My master just passed - 3/1/2006 9:55:51 PM   
EasyE


Posts: 111
Joined: 12/18/2005
Status: offline 		I have terrible news and need somone to talk to. I just learned that my master of about 2 months has passed without me ever having the chance to meet him. No one I am close to knows about my lifestyle, so I have virtually no one to talk to. I could use some advice from where to go from here. I will need to start the process of finding someone all over again . I know this is kind of selfish because I am not the dead one but I am deeply hurt and missing someone. I am supprised by how much I came to depend on him and need him.

Regards,

Edward

< Message edited by EasyE -- 3/1/2006 9:58:01 PM >
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: My master just passed - 3/1/2006 10:12:36 PM   
truesub4u


Posts: 2949
Joined: 11/17/2005
Status: offline 		Sorry to see of your loss.

Having never met your Master, I'm sure this is still hard. (Am curious as to how you found out) I do wish you the best and sorry you have no one in real time to turn to in a time such as this. Perhaps the one who informed you of your Masters passing?

Again, sorry for your loss.



_____________________________

Wisdom is knowing what to do next, Skill is knowing how to do it, and Virtue is doing it.

(in reply to EasyE)
Profile   Post #: 2
RE: My master just passed - 3/1/2006 10:12:51 PM   
MistressOfGa


Posts: 2929
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: EasyE

I have terrible news and need somone to talk to. I just learned that my master of about 2 months has passed without me ever having the chance to meet him. No one I am close to knows about my lifestyle, so I have virtually no one to talk to. I could use some advice from where to go from here. I will need to start the process of finding someone all over again . I know this is kind of selfish because I am not the dead one but I am deeply hurt and missing someone. I am supprised by how much I came to depend on him and need him.

Regards,

Edward

Hi Edward,
I am very sorry to hear about your Master and the pain you must be feeling. My advice, if you would like it, is to slow down and allow yourself some healing room before trying to start the process over again to find another Master. Good luck to you, and I wish you well.

_____________________________





(in reply to EasyE)
Profile   Post #: 3
RE: My master just passed - 3/1/2006 10:33:14 PM   
DragonNphoenix


Posts: 617
Joined: 8/2/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: EasyE

I have terrible news and need somone to talk to. I just learned that my master of about 2 months has passed without me ever having the chance to meet him. No one I am close to knows about my lifestyle, so I have virtually no one to talk to. I could use some advice from where to go from here. I will need to start the process of finding someone all over again . I know this is kind of selfish because I am not the dead one but I am deeply hurt and missing someone. I am supprised by how much I came to depend on him and need him.

Regards,

Edward


Edward ~ I can only try to understand your loss. I have not lost my Master, though I have lost those that were very close to me. I can only say that I am sooo very sorry to hear about this and that I would advise you to take some time and greive. You may not have meet r/t, but you came to depend on him. Your loss is no less great then if you had meet him.

I want you to know that if you need someone to chat with, you may email me at anytime, we (either me or My Master) are usually on yahoo. I look forward to talking with you.

1st Girl Phoenix

_____________________________

**Pain is just pleasure with a twist**

(in reply to EasyE)
Profile   Post #: 4
RE: My master just passed - 3/1/2006 10:44:54 PM   
kassiaethne


Posts: 8
Joined: 6/20/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: EasyE

I have terrible news and need somone to talk to. I just learned that my master of about 2 months has passed without me ever having the chance to meet him. No one I am close to knows about my lifestyle, so I have virtually no one to talk to. I could use some advice from where to go from here. I will need to start the process of finding someone all over again . I know this is kind of selfish because I am not the dead one but I am deeply hurt and missing someone. I am supprised by how much I came to depend on him and need him.

Regards,

Edward


im sorry you have lost him. its one of the most horrible feelings ever. all i can advise is find an anchor. someone to ground you to reality. if i didnt have one i know what i would have done. and then i wouldnt be here to tell you now would i? *huggles* if you needa talk...it helps. just the talking. most of what i say is going to go in one ear and out the other. just know im here to listen and care. and understand


< Message edited by kassiaethne -- 3/1/2006 10:45:28 PM >

(in reply to EasyE)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: My master just passed - 3/1/2006 11:18:07 PM   
Sirandlittle1


Posts: 538
Joined: 12/22/2005
Status: offline 		there are times when we are deeply grieving and happy to sit with that a while.

At other times, you want to be foolish and wreckless and get the hell out of the bad sit.com you find yourself in. Go for it, just dont do it with another Master.

That's what making friends is for. Use yours, if you havent got any, go get some. Join a munch and make some friends whilst you wait, and grieve. Plant a tree, a really hardy one that can be left without water. Have some ceremony, and put your feelings of grief down there for a while. Take it out, in small doses. Easy digestable scippets. When its too heavy, put it down again. Eventually, it goes. Eventually.


Be well.
littleone

(in reply to kassiaethne)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: My master just passed - 3/1/2006 11:26:07 PM   
LthrdWolf


Posts: 92
Joined: 1/23/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: EasyE

I have terrible news and need somone to talk to. I just learned that my master of about 2 months has passed without me ever having the chance to meet him. No one I am close to knows about my lifestyle, so I have virtually no one to talk to. I could use some advice from where to go from here. I will need to start the process of finding someone all over again . I know this is kind of selfish because I am not the dead one but I am deeply hurt and missing someone. I am supprised by how much I came to depend on him and need him.

Regards,

Edward


So Sorry to hear this news Edward.Don't be so hard on yourself re being aware of how you feel & your needs.It is those who are left behind,who grieve & suffer the loss.Heed the gentle suggestions to take time to heal or at least go slow,as your judgement will be cloudy for awhile.

LthrdWolf ...use the boards here for support & just to hang out ...so you are Not totally alone.

(in reply to EasyE)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: My master just passed - 3/1/2006 11:53:24 PM   
SimplyV


Posts: 351
Joined: 11/5/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: EasyE

I have terrible news and need somone to talk to. I just learned that my master of about 2 months has passed without me ever having the chance to meet him. No one I am close to knows about my lifestyle, so I have virtually no one to talk to. I could use some advice from where to go from here. I will need to start the process of finding someone all over again . I know this is kind of selfish because I am not the dead one but I am deeply hurt and missing someone. I am supprised by how much I came to depend on him and need him.

Regards,

Edward


That is terrible news. And yes it is amazing how we get so attached to people, how dependant we can get on people, and yet have never met them.

I'm sure any one of us would be glad to talk to you. I have two male subs close to your age, if you'd be more comfortable talking to them, I'm sure they also would be more than willing to help.

*hugs*
V

(in reply to EasyE)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: My master just passed - 3/2/2006 1:35:18 AM   
Speedalicious


Posts: 3
Joined: 6/26/2005
Status: offline 		Sorry to hear about your loss, My Mistress showed me this post. my heart goes out to you. if you want to talk or need to express something im always open for a chat

(in reply to EasyE)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: My master just passed - 3/2/2006 1:56:48 AM   
slavejali


Posts: 2918
Status: offline 		...

(in reply to Speedalicious)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: My master just passed - 3/2/2006 2:16:12 AM   
unownedredhead


Posts: 498
Joined: 2/5/2006
Status: offline 		Hey there....everyone greives in different ways. Over the millenium people have leanred that rituals help. That is why we have funerals. They say that even elephants grieve. They will touch the bones of the dead in ritualistic ways. My suggestion is to think of something symbolic to you. And perhaps a place where you can go to think of your Master.

On Halloween my mother always melted the end of birday candles and stuck them to plates. One candle per plate. They represented those that she loved who had passed. She would put them around the table, giving each one a setting including fork, knife, spoon and glass. The candles were lit to guide those she loved to break bread with her and the family. We would eat with the candles burning and we would talk about each and everyone of them. Laugh and share stories. That was her ritual.

Perhaps you could put a plate with one of these little candles in the window so your Master knows you have not forgotten him?

I understand some of your pain as I lost my Master to death as well.

*hugs*

dina

_____________________________

Kneeling trembling at your feet

(in reply to slavejali)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: My master just passed - 3/2/2006 3:05:42 AM   
orfunboi


Posts: 1223
Joined: 10/22/2005
Status: offline 		The loss of someone you care about is never easy. But your right, you need to keep living and move on. There are a lot of good groups in the SE MI area and if you are still in Frasier, then you are close enough. i would start by attending local munches and parties. There is a fetish party this saturday in Detroit, where you can meet a lot of very nice people. http://groups.yahoo.com/group/FetishOdysseyMonthlyParty/

Hope everything works out for you and don't be too hard on yourself. i am sure your Master would want you to keep looking.

(in reply to EasyE)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: My master just passed - 3/2/2006 5:23:13 AM   
michaelGA


Posts: 1194
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: EasyE

I have terrible news and need somone to talk to. I just learned that my master of about 2 months has passed without me ever having the chance to meet him. No one I am close to knows about my lifestyle, so I have virtually no one to talk to. I could use some advice from where to go from here. I will need to start the process of finding someone all over again . I know this is kind of selfish because I am not the dead one but I am deeply hurt and missing someone. I am supprised by how much I came to depend on him and need him.

Regards,

Edward


i am terribly sorry to hear of your loss and, although i have not lost a Mistress (in my case) i have lost someone that was very very close to me (my son, who drowned at age 5, no other details as this is not about me) and i feel for you.

after reading your post i sense not only saddness and pain, but i sense a bit of anger as well...all i can offer to you at this point is...don't let it turn inward on you. take some time to grieve and let yourself heal. this will take a bit of time to sort out all your mixed emotions.

you're taking the first step by reaching out, which is a good sign.

chin up dude. you're among friends here.

< Message edited by michaelGA -- 3/2/2006 5:31:22 AM >

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Are we having fun, yet?

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Profile   Post #: 13
RE: My master just passed - 3/2/2006 5:25:41 AM   
IrishMist


Posts: 7480
Joined: 11/17/2005
Status: offline 		I am sorry to hear about your loss

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If I said something to offend you, please tell me what it was so that I can say it again later.


(in reply to EasyE)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: My master just passed - 3/2/2006 5:29:22 AM   
RavenMuse


Posts: 4030
Joined: 1/23/2006
Status: offline 		First and only real piece of advice is not to start looking just yet. Give yourself time to grieve and put yourself back together again. Get to where you are content within yourself before seeking out another no matter how much you might want to. Otherwise you are quite likely to have those unresolved feeling get in the way when you are making decisions.... you need a clear head to make good choises.

_____________________________

This above all: to thine own self be true,
And it must follow, as the night the day,
Thou canst not then be false to any man.

Owner of metalmiss

(in reply to EasyE)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: My master just passed - 3/2/2006 5:44:16 AM   
DelightMachine


Posts: 652
Joined: 1/21/2006
Status: offline 		I'm so sorry to hear about your loss.

Sometimes one of the things that makes us feel better in grieving is to memorialize that person, but that's hard to do when you're in the closet about the lifestyle the two of you shared. Here's a suggestion: You might write about what your master meant to you and what you admired about him, what his strengths and other good qualities were. You could put that on your profile page as a memorial to him.

_____________________________

I'd rather be in
Chargoggagoggmanchauggagoggchaubunagungamaugg

(in reply to EasyE)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: My master just passed - 3/2/2006 6:10:19 AM   
thetammyjo


Posts: 6322
Joined: 9/8/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MistressOfGa


quote:

ORIGINAL: EasyE

I have terrible news and need somone to talk to. I just learned that my master of about 2 months has passed without me ever having the chance to meet him. No one I am close to knows about my lifestyle, so I have virtually no one to talk to. I could use some advice from where to go from here. I will need to start the process of finding someone all over again . I know this is kind of selfish because I am not the dead one but I am deeply hurt and missing someone. I am supprised by how much I came to depend on him and need him.

Regards,

Edward

Hi Edward,
I am very sorry to hear about your Master and the pain you must be feeling. My advice, if you would like it, is to slow down and allow yourself some healing room before trying to start the process over again to find another Master. Good luck to you, and I wish you well.


I'll second this suggestion.

Even though you never met him face-to-face the OP makes it clear there was a strong emotional loss so you need to go through a grieving process.

Sharing this on the forums is a good step. I'd recommend getting involved in forum discussion or reading them as a way to help you continue working through your feelings. You don't have to focus only on similar events but you can also just feel more connected since you feel like you have so few people to turn to in your meatlife.

_____________________________

Love, Peace, Hugs, Kisses, Whips & Chains,

TammyJo

Check out my website at http://www.thetammyjo.com Or www.tammyjoeckhart.com

And my LJ where I post fiction in progress if you "friend" me at http://thetammyjo.livejournal.com/

(in reply to MistressOfGa)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: My master just passed - 3/2/2006 7:04:22 AM   
submission22


Posts: 4
Joined: 2/27/2006
Status: offline 		i am sure everyone is going to jump on me for this...but...if this was an o/l thing, are you sure that he passed? Did you talk to his family members etc? I am sorry but i have heard this happen too many times and have had too many friends go through this...only to learn that the whole thing was faked. If it did indeed happen, i am truly sorry for your loss, i just hope you got all the details.

(in reply to EasyE)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: My master just passed - 3/2/2006 7:44:29 AM   
EasyE


Posts: 111
Joined: 12/18/2005
Status: offline 		Thank you all,

I am going back to Detroit for spring break this weekend and I might have to stop in on a munch.

I found out because his family saw my name on his messenger friends list and told me. I am waiting for a reply as to any details. I don't think it is a fake as he was very pleased with me and this doesn't seem like him. He is into building not destroying so this is the last thing I would expect.

I am in deep sorrow because I did not take the time to talk to him the last few days. His gray signed off face on Yahoo seemingly looks like the peaceful face of a dead loved one durring a visitation ceremony.

I am just going to have to keep my mind clear and not let grief take complete control. It is ironic because at lunch the other day I was telling some friend that I had never lost anyone that didn't need to go out of sickness or suffering but now I have. That seems to level the playing field and I feel partially responsible (I realize this is irrational but it is there none the less).

Thanks for the support,

Edward

PS Planting a tree is my favorite idea so far but I think I might keep up some of my protocols until I do find someon else.

(in reply to submission22)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: My master just passed - 3/2/2006 7:49:58 AM   
proudsub


Posts: 6142
Joined: 1/31/2004
From: Washington
Status: offline 		I am very sorry for your loss.

_____________________________

proudsub

"Without goals you become what you were. With goals you become what you wish." .

"You are entitled to your own opinions but not your own facts"--Alan Greenspan


(in reply to EasyE)
Profile   Post #: 20
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