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RE: Foot worshipping Dom - 10/12/2009 1:10:08 AM

SimplyIsaac

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Joined: 12/20/2008
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quote:

ORIGINAL: WyldHrt

WTF do any "cliques" have to do with this? As for the forum regulars (ie: clique, I guess), most of us are on the side of "do what is right for your own relationship". How exactly is that imcompatible with anyone who chooses not to measure their way of life out in kinks??

For the obvious reason there are those who take m&s seriously and find the maxim of "anything means anything", while colorful, isn't very helpful. For some, it's not about flavors of the great wide open world of kink, but getting to the heart of a recognizable philosophy and understanding of the psychology behind D/s.

The truth is, there is a mixed gamut of users on this site. There is the "anything goes" kinkster and the more serious m&s enthusiast. "Anything goes" is the only real cohesive idea a large group of kinky buddies can share, logically, though I'd bet each have more particular personal opinions they keep to themselves. Even so, that does not keep them from asserting the notion that anything must go. In that regard, this philosophy can be just as confusing and pointless as a list of "domly rules", as you put it.

As for cliques, if you really are questioning their existence on this site, I'd have to seriously consider your level of intelligence. Thankfully, your writing style indicates your are not as stupid as you pretend to be.

(in reply to WyldHrt)

Post #: 181

RE: Foot worshipping Dom - 10/12/2009 1:14:03 AM

SimplyIsaac

Posts: 376
Joined: 12/20/2008
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: WyldHrt

quote:

It probably highlights the main issue for you, but including those examples was unfortunate, as it is clear simply giving a back rub or bringing a drink in of itself bears no near universally recognized inference. The same cannot be said of foot worship, which is the subject of the OP.

It is NOT clear, as those examples were certainly not brought up by me, nor the "clique posse". The backrubs and drink bringing were brought up by the "no foot" brigade, as further examples of "UmDomly behaviour". After all, a Dom who gives a backrub or gets a drink for His sub is obviously a switch, or worse, a sub. Did you somehow miss those posts? Geez, if you are going to pick a side, at least read the posts.

I'm not even sure your'e offering a logical discussion at this point, so much as on a tag team mission, Wyld. The only side I am on is mine.

And the irony that you deny the existence of cliques yet infer on me choosing sides is not lost upon me.

Edited to add: I think we have beaten this subject into the ground, don't you think?

< Message edited by SimplyIsaac -- 10/12/2009 1:19:52 AM >

(in reply to WyldHrt)

Post #: 182

RE: Foot worshipping Dom - 10/12/2009 1:31:36 AM

WyldHrt

Posts: 6412
Joined: 6/5/2008
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quote:

As for cliques, if you really are questioning their existence on this site, I'd have to seriously consider your level of intelligence. Thankfully, your writing style indicates your are not as stupid as you pretend to be.

I was responding to your other points, then I saw this. I have zero use for someone who would resort to this sort of nastily backhanded "compliment", therefore I see no more use in responding to you.

_____________________________

"MotherFUCKER!" is NOT a safeword!!"- Steel
"We've had complaints about 'orgy noises'. This is not the neighborhood for that kind of thing"- PVE Cop

Resident "Hypnotic Eyes", "Cleavage" and "Toy Whore"
Subby Mafia, VAA Posse & Team Troll!

(in reply to SimplyIsaac)

Post #: 183

RE: Foot worshipping Dom - 10/12/2009 1:48:09 AM

DemonKia

Posts: 5521
Joined: 10/13/2007
From: Chico, Nor-Cali
Status: offline

Did you miss the shit Isaac pulled on Leadership in this thread, Wyld?

& then Isaac went & did his thing on Leadership's Is Carol A Slave thread; I'm looking forward to him & Orion tangling some more on that one, tho' it probably won't last long. Isaac seems to generate trainwrecks, but I notice that Jeff & Orion have zero interest in participating in trainwrecks . ...

I am currently in a very evil, obsessed with trainwrecks kinda mode . . . . lol . . . & thus what I'm doin' here . .. .. .

quote:

ORIGINAL: WyldHrt

quote:

As for cliques, if you really are questioning their existence on this site, I'd have to seriously consider your level of intelligence. Thankfully, your writing style indicates your are not as stupid as you pretend to be.

I was responding to your other points, then I saw this. I have zero use for someone who would resort to this sort of nastily backhanded "compliment", therefore I see no more use in responding to you.

(in reply to WyldHrt)

Post #: 184

RE: Foot worshipping Dom - 10/12/2009 7:48:22 AM

SimplyIsaac

Posts: 376
Joined: 12/20/2008
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: DemonKia

I am currently in a very evil, obsessed with trainwrecks kinda mode . . . . lol . . . & thus what I'm doin' here . .. .. .

No kidding.

(in reply to DemonKia)

Post #: 185

RE: Foot worshipping Dom - 10/12/2009 9:46:49 AM

OrionTheWolf

Posts: 7803
Joined: 10/11/2006
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quote:

ORIGINAL: SimplyIsaac

quote:

ORIGINAL: WyldHrt

WTF do any "cliques" have to do with this? As for the forum regulars (ie: clique, I guess), most of us are on the side of "do what is right for your own relationship". How exactly is that imcompatible with anyone who chooses not to measure their way of life out in kinks??

For the obvious reason there are those who take m&s seriously and find the maxim of "anything means anything", while colorful, isn't very helpful. For some, it's not about flavors of the great wide open world of kink, but getting to the heart of a recognizable philosophy and understanding of the psychology behind D/s.

Okay I will bite. Who determines what is serious or not? By philosophy do you mean a school of thought?

quote:

The truth is, there is a mixed gamut of users on this site. There is the "anything goes" kinkster and the more serious m&s enthusiast. "Anything goes" is the only real cohesive idea a large group of kinky buddies can share, logically, though I'd bet each have more particular personal opinions they keep to themselves. Even so, that does not keep them from asserting the notion that anything must go. In that regard, this philosophy can be just as confusing and pointless as a list of "domly rules", as you put it.

There is that word serious again, saying what you said in the first paragraph somewhat, but phrased differently. There is that word philosophy again. While I understand my meaning of philosophy, I am trying to understand what you mean by the use of that word. If you mean school of thought, then there are many different ones, and that would support the mixed gamut arena.

quote:

As for cliques, if you really are questioning their existence on this site, I'd have to seriously consider your level of intelligence. Thankfully, your writing style indicates your are not as stupid as you pretend to be.

Anyone that understands human behavior will know there will always be cliques, but that is an easy excuse to throw out. Could it be people that have a similar school of thought, that is in opposition to yours? Could it possibly be that it has nothing to do with "cliques"?

_____________________________

When speaking of slaves people always tend to ignore this definition "One who is abjectly subservient to a specified person or influence."

(in reply to SimplyIsaac)

Post #: 186

RE: Foot worshipping Dom - 10/12/2009 9:49:19 AM

OrionTheWolf

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Joined: 10/11/2006
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quote:

ORIGINAL: DemonKia

Isaac seems to generate trainwrecks, but I notice that Jeff & Orion have zero interest in participating in trainwrecks . ...

I like some trainwrecks, but what I like better is engagement where the person reveals a lot about themselves, and when they look at it in retrospect they go "Doh" and slap their forehead. They will never admit it, but it happens. Kind of like stripping the bullshit away from someone, and seeing what is left behind.

_____________________________

When speaking of slaves people always tend to ignore this definition "One who is abjectly subservient to a specified person or influence."

(in reply to DemonKia)

Post #: 187

RE: Foot worshipping Dom - 10/12/2009 10:48:19 AM

SimplyIsaac

Posts: 376
Joined: 12/20/2008
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quote:

ORIGINAL: OrionTheWolf

While I understand my meaning of philosophy, I am trying to understand what you mean by the use of that word.

The study of a theoretical branch of knowledge shared by individuals. That works for me. As for who determines seriousness or not, that is in the eye of the beholder, isn't it? Even so, it's fairly easy to see what ideas are tailored to please all and what ideas want go a little against the grain to get to a finer point. Call that serious. Call it "inconvenient". Call it bullshit. You choose.

quote:

ORIGINAL: OrionTheWolf

Anyone that understands human behavior will know there will always be cliques, but that is an easy excuse to throw out.

Whether it's easy to throw out or not doesn't invalidate the reality that it does get in the way regarding "school of thought".

quote:

ORIGINAL: OrionTheWolf

Could it be people that have a similar school of thought, that is in opposition to yours?

Who said I never recognized another school of thought here? Could it be you're not really here for answers so much as to form insinuations?

quote:

ORIGINAL: OrionTheWolf

I like some trainwrecks, but what I like better is engagement where the person reveals a lot about themselves, and when they look at it in retrospect they go "Doh" and slap their forehead. They will never admit it, but it happens.

Well, smoking gun to the above point. Still waiting on your in-depth analysis. The fact you have none outside of rephrasing vague insinuations should be revealing enough to you, but apparently not.

(in reply to OrionTheWolf)

Post #: 188

RE: Foot worshipping Dom - 10/12/2009 2:09:39 PM

alittleevil

Posts: 235
Joined: 10/25/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: GabrielleSlave

i have a dom friend who has an issue with one of his fetishes that he can't seem to get his head round. Sooooo i thought i would ask what everyone else thought.

The problem is this. He is a dominant male, but he loves to worship women's feet...

Hello,
For me the catch would be the word worship. "Worship feet" as in just really gets off on licking and sucking feet and expects his submissive to get into it too? That wouldn't be any more a problem than any other sort of sexual thing the he liked and i didn't. But, i can give a blowjob or i can worship cock and the mindset is quite different. If there was any actual worshipping involved (boy that's a funny word), i would be deeply unsettled by it. I would have to do it, but it would be profoundly disturbing.

Best,
aj

_____________________________

Throw me to the wolves because there's order in the pack (RHCP)

(in reply to GabrielleSlave)

Post #: 189

RE: Foot worshipping Dom - 10/12/2009 2:11:12 PM

OrionTheWolf

Posts: 7803
Joined: 10/11/2006
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That analysis will not occur in that other topic, as a poster I respect made a request that I will honor.

What I meant by that maybe a different school of thought than yours is occuring, is that you are quick to dismiss things because you have determined it is because of a clique, rather than just a group of people that think different than you, and similar to themselves. See how that works?

I am glad you believe that seriousness is in the eye of the beholder, because you uses the phrase "serious m/s" at least wtice in the post I was responding to, infer that those in opoosition to your thoughts were not serious. Well now we know that they may be serious, since they determine that. Kind of now changes exactly what you were saying.

The easy to throw out, was a comment that you seemed to rely heavily on calling people being in cliques as the reason they may disagree with you, rather than your now admission that they may just have a different, serious, school of thought than yours. Now that is stripped away, let us see what is left.

It seems like all that is left is your personal interpretations and philosophy, which if each has their own personal interpretations and philosophy, would mean "anything means anything" as the most helpful phrase you mentioned.

Did I miss anything?

_____________________________

When speaking of slaves people always tend to ignore this definition "One who is abjectly subservient to a specified person or influence."

(in reply to SimplyIsaac)

Post #: 190

RE: Foot worshipping Dom - 10/12/2009 2:34:32 PM

JonasTellas

Posts: 25
Joined: 8/7/2009
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: WyldHrt

quote:

So to say it in other ways, whatever your doms preferences are that are related to his dominance, you are to have no opinion? Is that what you mean? I follow you, but what if a doms preference was to start becoming more domineering and abusive? What if the doms preference was to start binge drinking because he can and he's the dom? What if his preference was to start serving you? What if a doms preference was to start catering to his submissive so that she ends up being served by him? As a woman who is submissive, are you going to say your feelings about your dom turning submissive should not matter because it's his "preference"? His behavior is going to have consequences, or at least they should. He should know that if he wants to keep his sub happy, he is going to have to conduct himself in a way that's going to keep subs. If I give myself to him and he starts conducting his actions like someone else, or something else, then there's going to be a problem. How he acts, what he does affects me,period. And I hold him to a standard too. Maybe I'm not understanding you but it seems you feel it's not your right to judge his dom preferences. But honestly, if he all of a sudden turned submissive on you, you would be fine with that? If this is true, then is it right to assume you care about just being in a relationship with your dom regardless of what he decides to do? I don't know,but for me, if my dom started to act submissive to me, kiss my feet, cater to my needs,I would leave him. I'm looking to serve, not be served. But that's just me.

Welcome to the fray, Jonas! Headgear, flamesuits, and padded gloves are on the shelf to your right, and there's cold water/ sports drinks in the fridge...

Now, to your posts. IMO, the big conflict here seems to be between those who seek to define "dominance" through some arbitrary list of pre-defined "Domly" and "submissive" acts; and those who see any act within the context of the dynamic in which it occurs. Rather big disconnect.

No one is saying that a Dom's (or sub's) actions cannot destroy the dynamic in any number of ways, or that the actions of a Dom aren't judged by His sub within their relationship. The argument is that some here seem to think that there is a specific list of acts that are so inherently "UnDomly", that they will erode and eventually detroy any D/s dynamic, no matter the context. Personally, I think that is horseshit, but others disagree.

Tnks! I certainly have a list of what behavior I'd view as un-submissive like: giving orders, disciplining someone, spanking someone. I also have a list of acts I consider not Dom-like: kissing feet, bowing, playing an adult baby, etc. What's the big deal with my perspective? I do wonder who is saying I'm wrong for having a list? I respect a person if they have a list of things they wouldn't accept in a Dom and it doesn't have to match my list. All I care about is how I view my dom and if he started behaving like a submissive on me, I would leave him in a ny minute. Kissing feet, cleaning, back rubbing, bowing - those are all my acts as a submissive, my dom doesn't need to do the feet kissing or bowing or cleaning. He can beat my feet, yes, and he has beaten them, but kiss my feet in adoration? Uh, no thank you, my dom won't do that ever and that is one behavior that would make me question what's going on.

(in reply to WyldHrt)

Post #: 191

RE: Foot worshipping Dom - 10/12/2009 3:03:51 PM

WyldHrt

Posts: 6412
Joined: 6/5/2008
Status: offline

IMO, everyone should have a list of things that are unacceptable to them. I certainly do, and it is used to determine compatibility with a potential partner.
I just get a bit shirty when some folks (not referring to you, Jonas) seem to think that their list is The Universal List, and that they have some right to dictate what is and isn't acceptable in other people's relationships. Call me quirky, but I prefer to judge for myself what is/ is not acceptable behaviour from my partner within our relationship.

ETA - missing "to"

< Message edited by WyldHrt -- 10/12/2009 3:05:29 PM >

_____________________________

"MotherFUCKER!" is NOT a safeword!!"- Steel
"We've had complaints about 'orgy noises'. This is not the neighborhood for that kind of thing"- PVE Cop

Resident "Hypnotic Eyes", "Cleavage" and "Toy Whore"
Subby Mafia, VAA Posse & Team Troll!

(in reply to JonasTellas)

Post #: 192

RE: Foot worshipping Dom - 10/12/2009 4:01:29 PM

DemonKia

Posts: 5521
Joined: 10/13/2007
From: Chico, Nor-Cali
Status: offline

Not a single person has said that (quote below) thru the whole thread. Everyone is entitled to their own personal desires & wants & needs & etc . . . . .

As with Wyld, I have a problem when someone (profusely) insists that their own personal list does or should apply to other people . . . .

People use these threads as a source of education & I hate to give them any more limits than they need.

What really matters is what works for any given individual or partnership. If there are s-types out there who get turned on by their dom 'worshipping' their feet, & their dom wants to do that, who's business is it outside that dynamic to say otherwise?

quote:

ORIGINAL: JonasTellas

...I do wonder who is saying I'm wrong for having a list?

(in reply to JonasTellas)

Post #: 193

RE: Foot worshipping Dom - 10/12/2009 4:40:51 PM

SimplyIsaac

Posts: 376
Joined: 12/20/2008
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: OrionTheWolf

That analysis will not occur in that other topic, as a poster I respect made a request that I will honor.

I had a feeling that would happen.

quote:

ORIGINAL: OrionTheWolf
What I meant by that maybe a different school of thought than yours is occuring, is that you are quick to dismiss things because you have determined it is because of a clique, rather than just a group of people that think different than you, and similar to themselves. See how that works?

Orion, tell you what, instead of educating a straw man, let me break this down for you:

1. Actual argument from "the other school of thought" is worth engaging. Some of it I actually agree with.

2. Clearly, my arguments are my own. I believe I have mentioned that I speak for myself more than once here.

3. Jumping on a thread out of personal need to avenge an online buddy, for instance, isn't what I consider a serious motive for debate, nor is speaking in general platitudes about "kink" when psychology of m&s is being discussed.

With that said, I would like to know your personal feelings on worshipping the feet of your slave girl. I figured this is a good chance for you to actually get on subject in this thread.

(in reply to OrionTheWolf)

Post #: 194

RE: Foot worshipping Dom - 10/12/2009 4:57:28 PM

OrionTheWolf

Posts: 7803
Joined: 10/11/2006
Status: offline

The dominant should do as he/she pleases, but she be aware of the consequences of their actions. If it is a lite play type relationship, it may not be a problem, where as some heavy power exchange relationships, it may diminish the dominants authority in the mind of the submissive/slave/whatever. Some may say that a the submissive should not allow it to diminish the authority, but people can only control their actions, and not the feelings of emotions.

A while back in another topic I made a comment "If it pleases me to fuck a mailbox, I will do it, but if people know then I am fully prepared for them to point at me and say "that guy fucks mailboxes"."

quote:

ORIGINAL: GabrielleSlave

i have a dom friend who has an issue with one of his fetishes that he can't seem to get his head round. Sooooo i thought i would ask what everyone else thought.

The problem is this. He is a dominant male, but he loves to worship women's feet; on the surface it would appear to be somewhat of a paradox. However, i have told him that he should be able to do this with a sub female as he is the boss and therefore should get what he wants. i figured that if it humiliated her, or made her uncomfortable then so much the better lol!

Not sure if he'll take my opinion on board, so what does everyone else reckon?

hugs

gabrielle x

_____________________________

When speaking of slaves people always tend to ignore this definition "One who is abjectly subservient to a specified person or influence."

(in reply to GabrielleSlave)

Post #: 195

RE: Foot worshipping Dom - 10/12/2009 4:58:55 PM

SimplyIsaac

Posts: 376
Joined: 12/20/2008
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: DemonKia
People use these threads as a source of education & I hate to give them any more limits than they need.

What really matters is what works for any given individual or partnership. If there are s-types out there who get turned on by their dom 'worshipping' their feet, & their dom wants to do that, who's business is it outside that dynamic to say otherwise?

Well, Kia, this message board might be pretty drab if the only point of discussion here is to hold hands and say, "your truth, my truth." For some subjects I might just sing Kumbaya right along with you. For others, no. People are going to passionately disagree once you get past the boilerplate BDSM speak. Strong disagreement is a product of diversity, too, and rightly so. More of that spirit is needed if education is really the goal.

For the record (again) this thread is about foot worship and the psychodynamics involved. It's not about a "list" or attacking a way of life.

(in reply to DemonKia)

Post #: 196

RE: Foot worshipping Dom - 10/12/2009 5:29:57 PM

DemonKia

Posts: 5521
Joined: 10/13/2007
From: Chico, Nor-Cali
Status: offline

& like with most threads hereabout, it's here for people to try to 'dom' the thread .. . . . lol . . . . & good luck with that . . . . .

Isaac, why don't you start a thread on your philosophy of serious m&s, since it clearly will offer educational richness to the many 'clueless us', given how it's apparently not the same thing us kinksters & other BDSM dilletantes subscribe to 'round here. ... . .

Ya know, since the point of this thread isn't a serious discussion of your philosophy of m&s, it's a discussion about doms worshipping feet . . . . . . & you keep derailing off that topic, onto your philosophy, & then chastising the rest of us for our derailments . . ... .

quote:

ORIGINAL: SimplyIsaac

quote:

ORIGINAL: DemonKia
People use these threads as a source of education & I hate to give them any more limits than they need.

What really matters is what works for any given individual or partnership. If there are s-types out there who get turned on by their dom 'worshipping' their feet, & their dom wants to do that, who's business is it outside that dynamic to say otherwise?

Well, Kia, this message board might be pretty drab if the only point of discussion here is to hold hands and say, "your truth, my truth." For some subjects I might just sing Kumbaya right along with you. For others, no. People are going to passionately disagree once you get past the boilerplate BDSM speak. Strong disagreement is a product of diversity, too, and rightly so. More of that spirit is needed if education is really the goal.

For the record (again) this thread is about foot worship and the psychodynamics involved. It's not about a "list" or attacking a way of life.

&, hey, Isaac, when you tried to chase after Leadership, to his thread in General, & start arguing with him, that was not an example of: "Jumping on a thread out of personal need to avenge" a masterful slap down, is it?

No, of course not. That was, rather, an exquisite example of: "a serious motive for debate..."

&, yes, Isaac, you're my trainwreck of choice this week . . . . . But that competition's pretty fierce & most of the competitors are sadly so short of tenure hereabouts.

I've got my fingers crossed that you'll be offering me tons of entertainment for months to come, rather than scampering away quickly after enough of the locals quit replying to your postings . . . . . .

(in reply to SimplyIsaac)

Post #: 197

RE: Foot worshipping Dom - 10/12/2009 6:03:26 PM

SimplyIsaac

Posts: 376
Joined: 12/20/2008
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: DemonKia&, hey, Isaac, when you tried to chase after Leadership, to his thread in General, & start arguing with him, that was not an example of: "Jumping on a thread out of personal need to avenge" a masterful slap down, is it?

Actually, my first post to him in that thread wasn't an attack at all. I complimented him for his introspection over the word "slave", which was timed quite well with our exchange the previous evening. He chose to keep up the hostility.

You would be well served in getting your facts right before employing them, Kia.

(in reply to DemonKia)

Post #: 198

RE: Foot worshipping Dom - 10/12/2009 7:03:12 PM

DemonKia

Posts: 5521
Joined: 10/13/2007
From: Chico, Nor-Cali
Status: offline

As I said, I'm hoping you manage to hang around here after most of the other regulars quit replying to your bait-&-switch, let-Isaac-tell-you-how-it-seriously-is, passive-aggressive fun-posts . . . . .

&, hey, you're not addressing the topic of the thread in your post, above, Isaac. But, please, by all means, keep trying to herd everyone else in these threads . . . . .

&, while I deeply appreciate your repeated attempts to chide me & otherwise shame me into posting the way you think I oughta, I don't think that's ever gonna happen, lol . . . . . But please keep trying. I'm enjoying all your thrashing about.

I can't wait 'til you remonstrate me for grammar or spelling or typoes . . .. . .

< Message edited by DemonKia -- 10/12/2009 7:05:36 PM >

(in reply to SimplyIsaac)

Post #: 199

RE: Foot worshipping Dom - 10/12/2009 7:08:43 PM

SimplyIsaac

Posts: 376
Joined: 12/20/2008
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: DemonKia
I can't wait 'til you remonstrate me for grammar or spelling or typoes . . .. . .

I didn't mean to turn you on there, Kia.

(in reply to DemonKia)

Post #: 200

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