Finding "the One"

Finding "the One" (Full Version)

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IBused -> Finding "the One" (10/13/2009 4:40:08 PM)
Are the Mistesses looking for the one, or the ten? The Hot and sexy or the one that makes you comfortable despite a face only a Mother could love? I want a perfect body, I wanna perfect soul..I want you to want me, when I'm not around I want to be special...so special...."OK, I didn't make that up, but who sings it? My question is substance or looks......peeks in the mirror as it breaks.....hmmm, OK, hopefully substance is the driver here.

LadyHibiscus -> RE: Finding "the One" (10/13/2009 5:24:39 PM)
One of these years, I am going to have some seriously HOTTTT sub. Like, one of those GQ cover types. And he will NOT be gay! Yepper... In the meantime, I am happy with what I have, a regular guy.

MistressEllen444 -> RE: Finding "the One" (10/13/2009 5:33:00 PM)
Who says you cannot have both? I have had many subs who are highly educated and bodies/faces that would inspire statues equal to any Greek God. To consider looks and substance (whatever those mean to whomever) as exclusive attributes seems very shallow. I made a list of what I want and it read: ALL - and thank goodness I end up getting that more times than not.

LadyHibiscus -> RE: Finding "the One" (10/13/2009 5:34:33 PM)
I didn't say that they were exclusive attributes---just that I look for personality and intellect over beauty. Lucky for you that you found your image of perfection.

LookieNoNookie -> RE: Finding "the One" (10/13/2009 5:44:55 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: IBused Are the Mistesses looking for the one, or the ten? The Hot and sexy or the one that makes you comfortable despite a face only a Mother could love? I want a perfect body, I wanna perfect soul..I want you to want me, when I'm not around I want to be special...so special...."OK, I didn't make that up, but who sings it? My question is substance or looks......peeks in the mirror as it breaks.....hmmm, OK, hopefully substance is the driver here. "Mistresses" are looking for the same thing you are. 25 year old chics are looking for a hottie, or cash. 35 year olds are vastly more mature....looking for cash, hotties or their soul mate. Older than that, they've grown accustomed to their own skin, their looking for (like most of us) someone who isn't terribly wrinkled, can hold a job, can carry a conversation, picks up their socks, has paid their mortgage on time at least 23 of the last 24 due dates...and....knows how to order for her in a restaurant without repeat ministrations from her. (Glad I could help).

SweetDommes -> RE: Finding "the One" (10/13/2009 5:45:17 PM)
When making the final decision - personality will always win out over looks (what good is eye-candy if all he does is irritate me when he opens his mouth?). As for the 'one' vs. 'ten' thing - well ... we want two, and we already have one, so technically, we are looking for "the one" LOL Like in most things, different people are looking for different things in a relationship. You have to find out what the person you are interested in wants.

LookieNoNookie -> RE: Finding "the One" (10/13/2009 5:47:25 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: LadyHibiscus One of these years, I am going to have some seriously HOTTTT sub. Like, one of those GQ cover types. And he will NOT be gay! Yepper... In the meantime, I am happy with what I have, a regular guy. Wish I would have read Lady H's treatise before I wrote mine. (She said it muuuuuuuch better).

GeorgiaMaam -> RE: Finding "the One" (10/13/2009 7:14:01 PM)
I like eye candy that can also hold down a job and handle a relationship.

LadyJulieAnn -> RE: Finding "the One" (10/13/2009 7:25:48 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: IBused I want a perfect body, I wanna perfect soul..I want you to want me, when I'm not around I want to be special...so special...."OK, I didn't make that up, but who sings it? Those are lyrics from the song "Creep" by Radiohead.

MistressTaboo -> RE: Finding "the One" (10/13/2009 9:40:00 PM)
I chose to have it all. I have my "one and only" my husband. I chose him out of all the men I've played and dated. He's the one that makes my heart skip a beat and gets my sense of humor. I love that he loves many of the same kinky things I do. Is he gorgeous? Only to me. Have national level presenters complimented me on him and told me if he wasn't married they'd make a serious pitch for stealing him based on his service? More than a few. BUT we are poly...and I do have some boys that are so freaking gorgeous they make your teeth hurt. But unless they have something holding their ears apart...the novelty wears off over time. I will say this though...I have passed up on many a gorgeous man because they can't hold a conversation or they think too highly of themselves to even try. Personality wins over looks every time....as my grandma said "Looks fade, brains don't". Grandma was right.

MsStarlett -> RE: Finding "the One" (10/14/2009 3:56:07 AM)
I've been married to my 'one and only' for 23 years. Subs have to understand they are only 'extras' to me. Their job is to fill in all the little 'cracks' left that the hubby can't, or more precisely chooses not to fill. Finding your one true love in vanilla life is difficult enough. When one layers the kink on top, it's just one more complication. I believe that's why so many have semi-vanilla spouses and fill the kink need on the side. This works WAY better when the spouse is like mine. He knows what's going on and supports my extracurricular activities.

LadyHibiscus -> RE: Finding "the One" (10/14/2009 5:06:21 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: LookieNoNookie quote: ORIGINAL: LadyHibiscus One of these years, I am going to have some seriously HOTTTT sub. Like, one of those GQ cover types. And he will NOT be gay! Yepper... In the meantime, I am happy with what I have, a regular guy. Wish I would have read Lady H's treatise before I wrote mine. (She said it muuuuuuuch better). Well of course I did, sweetie, I'm the chick! [:D] I liked yours too, though. I take extra ice in my iced tea, btw. Just saying. [;)]

LadyPact -> RE: Finding "the One" (10/14/2009 8:40:56 AM)
Like the other poly folks on the thread, I am going to say the same. I've already got the one, plus another one. I'm already pretty happy with that. What little bit of looking that I actually do, isn't honestly based on looks. It's more about who they are, how they serve, and at least a score of other things that I could say that are more important than physical appearance.

kccuckoldmist -> RE: Finding "the One" (10/14/2009 2:18:18 PM)
I went looking to find my future one and only I wanted someone compatible that will rock my world. I have no scientific chart to calculate the hotness of the man physically to what other aspects I was willing to sacrifice for that. For the most part when seeking out a partner it is basically pass/fail in terms of looks. I do not think my physical standards are too picky but that is always such a loaded and subjected thought. But even if some “oh my” reactions to a man physically do not have to be there to be my guy does not mean physical looks are not going to factor into the equation. We as human beings take input subconsciously as much as we do consciously and to think looks get totally tossed aside is a bit too much for me.

pyroaquatic -> RE: Finding "the One" (10/14/2009 3:25:34 PM)
I'm hot. :3 Yeah baby. Shake yo ass, watch yo self..... shake yo ass.... show me whatya workin fo. Compatibility is more important than physical looks. Do I want Domme A who says 'give me yo money and i might let you masturbate' (but i barely know you....what?) or do i want Domme B who cares little about the money (for she pushes me to make more money and gives me the proper guidance) and their is an extreme amount of depth to how we relate. or do i want Domme C who is extremely attractive but uses the brainbasket to store lipstick, makeup, and other fashion accessories. Some may like Domme A B or C.... and the puzzle pieces fit. Yay. I would like to believe that the reverse can be true.

SweetAngieDoll -> RE: Finding "the One" (10/15/2009 10:57:40 AM)
I agree! It is the same with both Doms and Subs. Most on here (collarme.com) seem to be interested in the next famous model. I thought this site was for Doms to find slaves and Subs to find Doms not people to find a life partner. It is great that Doms and Subs can meet and become life partners but, in my opinion that is not what the whole Dom and Sub things is about. We need to learn to judge and except based on ability not looks. As SweetDommes stated, what good is looks if your sub can not doing anything right or does not know how to serve you. And what good is looks if your dom does not know what they are doing. Looks = Sex and as for me, the Dom/Sub life style is not about sex but, a inner desire. For me that inner desire is two things, one is to serve my owner 24/7 and the other is be a female rubber doll someday. SweetAngieDoll quote: ORIGINAL: SweetDommes When making the final decision - personality will always win out over looks (what good is eye-candy if all he does is irritate me when he opens his mouth?). As for the 'one' vs. 'ten' thing - well ... we want two, and we already have one, so technically, we are looking for "the one" LOL Like in most things, different people are looking for different things in a relationship. You have to find out what the person you are interested in wants.

MissCake -> RE: Finding "the One" (10/15/2009 11:06:53 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: IBused Are the Mistesses looking for the one, or the ten? You really have to ask each one. But as to women in general and dominant ones in particular, we pretty much always put a high value on non-physical characteristics - personality, humour, intelligence, etc. That is not to say that we don't value looks, or that some of us don't value look above many other factors. But, since you asked a general question, the answer is general. Don't you want a partner with looks AND personality if you manage to come across one?

Sylverdawn -> RE: Finding "the One" (10/15/2009 12:05:52 PM)
A boy who is caring, willing, able and blessed with a sense of humor ... if he is great looking freaking great .. if not ..ok.. he only need to truly want to be in service to me... and that seems to be the sticker.. they want what they want when they want it and could it please be dressed in a corset and thighhighs... so I say y es to the universe... realizing it is what it is.. and fighting and moaning about it is not going to change it...

geomease -> RE: Finding "the One" (10/15/2009 1:16:38 PM)
The only thing I desire more than being dominated, is being with someone I love. (and hey if that person I love can dominate me then thats a double win) Even before I accepted my kinky interests I was always looking for a long term relationship when all the kids my age were looking for a schoolyard fling with no real commitment. Thats part of the reason my vanilla dating experiences in high school were such disasters because I was always looking for love and nobody else was. Well hoepfully one day I'll be able to find that special girl, or guy so be it, that will make my life complete. Until then all i can do is put myself out there and see if anyone is interested in getting close enough to know me.

IBused -> RE: Finding "the One" (10/15/2009 2:13:10 PM)
Wow......I am going with the plastic surgeon who said "your are a great looking Mon, but I shall make you Beautiful." Costa Rica...here I come.

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