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The Vanilla Switch - 10/20/2009 6:29:44 AM   
lovingpet


Posts: 4270
Joined: 6/19/2005
Status: offline 		...is a concept my partner and I have played around with. This is a potential three way switch that runs the gamut from the everyday kink free existance to full blown dominance, submission, or both. Boxes and labels aren't my thing, but I find it an interesting concept. I know that kind of just describes life in general, but I am talking more about the dynamics within the couple/group. We all have our vanilla and more deviant interests. This is more in terms of the way they relate to each other. I am doing a horrible job explaining this, but perhaps some discussion might still be interesting.

lovingpet

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RE: The Vanilla Switch - 10/20/2009 6:59:20 AM   
RCdc


Posts: 8674
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quote:

ORIGINAL: lovingpet

...is a concept my partner and I have played around with. This is a potential three way switch that runs the gamut from the everyday kink free existance to full blown dominance, submission, or both. Boxes and labels aren't my thing, but I find it an interesting concept. I know that kind of just describes life in general, but I am talking more about the dynamics within the couple/group. We all have our vanilla and more deviant interests. This is more in terms of the way they relate to each other. I am doing a horrible job explaining this, but perhaps some discussion might still be interesting.

lovingpet


We just call it life - and living it.

the.dark.

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RC&dc


love isnt gazing into each others eyes - it's looking forward in the same direction

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RE: The Vanilla Switch - 10/20/2009 7:01:56 AM   
lovingpet


Posts: 4270
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Darcyandthedark

quote:

ORIGINAL: lovingpet

...is a concept my partner and I have played around with. This is a potential three way switch that runs the gamut from the everyday kink free existance to full blown dominance, submission, or both. Boxes and labels aren't my thing, but I find it an interesting concept. I know that kind of just describes life in general, but I am talking more about the dynamics within the couple/group. We all have our vanilla and more deviant interests. This is more in terms of the way they relate to each other. I am doing a horrible job explaining this, but perhaps some discussion might still be interesting.

lovingpet


We just call it life - and living it.

the.dark.


And, as you know, I am in total agreement with you. It's just something fun to occupy my extremely bored little brain today.

lovingpet

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If you put your head into more, you'd have to put your back into less. ~Me

10 Fluffy pts.


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RE: The Vanilla Switch - 10/20/2009 7:04:12 AM   
RCdc


Posts: 8674
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: lovingpet


quote:

ORIGINAL: Darcyandthedark

quote:

ORIGINAL: lovingpet

...is a concept my partner and I have played around with. This is a potential three way switch that runs the gamut from the everyday kink free existance to full blown dominance, submission, or both. Boxes and labels aren't my thing, but I find it an interesting concept. I know that kind of just describes life in general, but I am talking more about the dynamics within the couple/group. We all have our vanilla and more deviant interests. This is more in terms of the way they relate to each other. I am doing a horrible job explaining this, but perhaps some discussion might still be interesting.

lovingpet


We just call it life - and living it.

the.dark.


And, as you know, I am in total agreement with you. It's just something fun to occupy my extremely bored little brain today.

lovingpet


Ya should join facebook... they have games...

the.dark.

_____________________________
RC&dc


love isnt gazing into each others eyes - it's looking forward in the same direction

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RE: The Vanilla Switch - 10/20/2009 7:07:09 AM   
lovingpet


Posts: 4270
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Status: offline 		Games? Where? Where?

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If you put your head into more, you'd have to put your back into less. ~Me

10 Fluffy pts.


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RE: The Vanilla Switch - 10/20/2009 8:12:03 AM   
DesFIP


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From: Apple County NY
Status: offline 		I'm told if you start playing Mafia Wars, you never stop. Be warned.

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RE: The Vanilla Switch - 10/20/2009 8:13:30 AM   
TwistedHeart74


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Status: offline 		Don't do it....*pales* Mafia Wars is internet crack! There's no cure! Run!! RUN AWAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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RE: The Vanilla Switch - 10/20/2009 9:06:21 AM   
lovingpet


Posts: 4270
Joined: 6/19/2005
Status: offline 		LOL!!!!! Well I was told to stay away from bdsm too, so I'm probably totally screwed! Thanks a lot

Okay, so back to the topic. Do folks think there is a such thing as a vanilla switch, one who is vanilla and kink/power exchange oriented? They seem as antithetical as dom/sub switch, but of course that is possible. Just curiosity and all. I would totally enjoy a heated debate, but yeah no bombing of small villages please!

lovingpet

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If you put your head into more, you'd have to put your back into less. ~Me

10 Fluffy pts.


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RE: The Vanilla Switch - 10/20/2009 5:24:18 PM   
DesFIP


Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline 		Probably. I mean I'm all sub but I'm not throwing a game of mini golf so he feels more adored. There are lots of occasions in life where he doesn't have any decisions to make. Lots of stuff where D/s doesn't enter into it. So I guess I'm vanilla/sub.  Because I don't even think of asking him about may I cook dinner. He may say a couple of times a week in good weather that he feels like grilling, at which point I do put away the makings for chicken pot pie and pull out the burgers. But he isn't going to command me to put three sprigs of parsley, not two into the pie. It wouldn't enter his mind to do so nor mine to ask for permission.

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Slave to laundry

Cynical and proud of it!


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RE: The Vanilla Switch - 10/20/2009 5:51:05 PM   
Level


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Joined: 3/3/2006
Status: offline 		pet, I'm feeling dense tonight, I'm still not sure what you mean by "vanilla switch".

*goes to a mirror, shines a light in my ear, trying to make sure light doesn't come out the other side*

_____________________________

Fake the heat and scratch the itch
Skinned up knees and salty lips
Let go it's harder holding on
One more trip and I'll be gone

~~ Stone Temple Pilots

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RE: The Vanilla Switch - 10/20/2009 5:54:59 PM   
lovingpet


Posts: 4270
Joined: 6/19/2005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Level

pet, I'm feeling dense tonight, I'm still not sure what you mean by "vanilla switch".

*goes to a mirror, shines a light in my ear, trying to make sure light doesn't come out the other side*


It's probably a lost cause, but here I go again. LOL

You know how a switch is typically a dually oriented individual, both dominant and submissive. I am wondering if there might be another variety out there that is vanilla/sub vanilla/dom or vanilla/sub/dom. Bahhhh, I give up!

lovingpet

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If you put your head into more, you'd have to put your back into less. ~Me

10 Fluffy pts.


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RE: The Vanilla Switch - 10/20/2009 6:04:47 PM   
leadership527


Posts: 5026
Joined: 6/2/2008
Status: offline 		OK, I'm still hopelessly lost on the question but very intrigued all the same.

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~Jeff

I didn't so much "enslave" Carol as I did "enlove" her. - Me
I want a joyous, loving, respectful relationship where the male is in charge and deserves to be. - DavanKael

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RE: The Vanilla Switch - 10/20/2009 6:08:21 PM   
Level


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Joined: 3/3/2006
Status: offline 		I think what's tripping me up is the inclusion of "vanilla"; can somebody be vanilla and kinky?

_____________________________

Fake the heat and scratch the itch
Skinned up knees and salty lips
Let go it's harder holding on
One more trip and I'll be gone

~~ Stone Temple Pilots

(in reply to leadership527)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: The Vanilla Switch - 10/20/2009 6:15:57 PM   
lovingpet


Posts: 4270
Joined: 6/19/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Level

I think what's tripping me up is the inclusion of "vanilla"; can somebody be vanilla and kinky?


Bingo! That's the question. It is still dual orientation isn't it? So theoretically it should be possible, right?

lovingpet

_____________________________

If you put your head into more, you'd have to put your back into less. ~Me

10 Fluffy pts.


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Profile   Post #: 14
RE: The Vanilla Switch - 10/20/2009 6:21:30 PM   
leadership527


Posts: 5026
Joined: 6/2/2008
Status: offline 		So pet... I do this wierd-assed authority dynamic, but our bedroom contains no trapezes. Is that something like what you're talking about? I am arguablly vanilla in a lot of ways, not just what we do or don't, but in how I identify and my sensibilities. For instance, I am not intruged by the idea of going to a BDSM club, the thought makes me uncomfortable.

_____________________________

~Jeff

I didn't so much "enslave" Carol as I did "enlove" her. - Me
I want a joyous, loving, respectful relationship where the male is in charge and deserves to be. - DavanKael

(in reply to lovingpet)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: The Vanilla Switch - 10/20/2009 6:26:21 PM   
lovingpet


Posts: 4270
Joined: 6/19/2005
Status: offline 		I would see what you do as it is described here as D/s without S/m. Of course, now there has to be the attempt to define a label and we all know how well that can go! LOL I would probably have to ask if you are always in the control/lead or if there are times the dominance shuts off and the two of you are pretty much egalitarian and find fulfillment in both. Darn this is really hard to explain. I bet that man knew I was gonna try to post this and is getting sadistic kicks out of watching me try to explain this! Damn him! I just gotta love him!

lovingpet

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If you put your head into more, you'd have to put your back into less. ~Me

10 Fluffy pts.


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RE: The Vanilla Switch - 10/20/2009 6:28:19 PM   
leadership527


Posts: 5026
Joined: 6/2/2008
Status: offline 		yeah.. that's how I'd describe us too. Oh well.

Although I gotta admit, given how articulate you normally are, this is rather amusing watching you try to formulate this thought. *chuckles*

_____________________________

~Jeff

I didn't so much "enslave" Carol as I did "enlove" her. - Me
I want a joyous, loving, respectful relationship where the male is in charge and deserves to be. - DavanKael

(in reply to lovingpet)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: The Vanilla Switch - 10/20/2009 6:29:23 PM   
Level


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Joined: 3/3/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: lovingpet


quote:

ORIGINAL: Level

I think what's tripping me up is the inclusion of "vanilla"; can somebody be vanilla and kinky?


Bingo! That's the question. It is still dual orientation isn't it? So theoretically it should be possible, right?

lovingpet


Not according to how I understand the terminology to be (but I'm open to convincing to the contrary).

The duality of a switch is inclusive of some combination of top/dominant & bottom/submissive. Vanilla is the absence of those traits.

Or is there an angle I'm missing?

_____________________________

Fake the heat and scratch the itch
Skinned up knees and salty lips
Let go it's harder holding on
One more trip and I'll be gone

~~ Stone Temple Pilots

(in reply to lovingpet)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: The Vanilla Switch - 10/20/2009 6:35:54 PM   
lovingpet


Posts: 4270
Joined: 6/19/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Level


quote:

ORIGINAL: lovingpet


quote:

ORIGINAL: Level

I think what's tripping me up is the inclusion of "vanilla"; can somebody be vanilla and kinky?


Bingo! That's the question. It is still dual orientation isn't it? So theoretically it should be possible, right?

lovingpet


Not according to how I understand the terminology to be (but I'm open to convincing to the contrary).

The duality of a switch is inclusive of some combination of top/dominant & bottom/submissive. Vanilla is the absence of those traits.

Or is there an angle I'm missing?


Okay, if I am dominant, I am currently lacking submissive traits. If I am submissive, I am currently lacking dominant traits. Is it not possible then to occasionally display kink traits, and not be vanilla or to sometime identify as vanilla and not display those same kink traits? This gets into whether a switch can be a weal and twue subbie or dom in that a similar question gets raised. Just like you asked it, can a vanilla person be a weal and twue kinky person or vise versa? Duality is confuzzling, but rather fascinating.

lovingpet

_____________________________

If you put your head into more, you'd have to put your back into less. ~Me

10 Fluffy pts.


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RE: The Vanilla Switch - 10/20/2009 6:37:30 PM   
lovingpet


Posts: 4270
Joined: 6/19/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: leadership527

yeah.. that's how I'd describe us too. Oh well.

Although I gotta admit, given how articulate you normally are, this is rather amusing watching you try to formulate this thought. *chuckles*


You say that like being switch is a bad thing. Sheesh!

Yeah, yeah laugh it up why don't you! Sadist!

lovingpet

_____________________________

If you put your head into more, you'd have to put your back into less. ~Me

10 Fluffy pts.


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