I'm confused - how do you know if someone is just stringing you along?

I'm confused - how do you know if someone is just stringing you along? (Full Version)

All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion

Message

lilmisssubmiss -> I'm confused - how do you know if someone is just stringing you along? (10/27/2009 10:19:45 AM)
Ok, well first.. I met this dominant couple on here months ago. We get along over the phone great. I was always asked when I could come out this last summer... I was working a lot though and the trust wasn't quite there so of course we decided to wait. They ended up doing this project on a house of their dreams and it turned into a huge ordeal where they have build the house on the property up before they can tear it down.. I don't really know how to explain it, lol. But, he's been taking.... I'd say at least two months on this house. We use to talk a lot.. but now it's dwindled down to where we barely talk. Today is the last day before the appraiser? comes so he said it'd be more back to normal after today. We will talk a lot more. So if that doesn't happen..should I just say bye at this point? (continue reading to answer that question please) One of the times through this whole thing I talked to him on the phone and he seemed way stressed, but he was still really nice to me..but i could tell he was dealing with a lot. I mean, but It's been 2 MONTHS NOW. I talked to him on the phone a couple of days ago and he mentioned the plane ticket and getting me out there, he promised we will be talking a lot more before that happens (but it's kind of hard to believe that right now). I mean, he seems soo genuine and sincere. I usually can tell right away if someone isn't and my gut is usually right..only problem is..i have no idea what my 'gut' feeling is at this point..no idea. His wife who I really adore... i guess is always up at the house and doesn't get reception so I haven't talked to her since this whole thing has happened...not at all...which is a little weird to me... I have no idea what to think or do at this point. Am I just being silly? Is it really just the fact I can't be a priority right now because the house is a huge deal (i mean ..it's a matter of having a place to live for them..)...am i being unreasonable and impatient? He says i have nothing to worry about..their feelings for me haven't changed at all it's just the situation..but i don't flipping know. I have attachment issues and with people I haven't met face to face I seem to have this huge problem with thinking they are going to ditch me and it really bothers me with people i really care about.

mnottertail -> RE: I'm confused - how do you know if someone is just stringing you along? (10/27/2009 10:28:16 AM)
you are 18, he is how old? lets see, he is working with about a 100k-200k mortgage and building and permits and appraisers and banks and contractors, and he doesnt call you like he used to? OK how was he before this began? if he is that way after, you are good. but because you are not there at the moment, does not mean nothing is going on in your absence, and you were the first to put a kibosh on the moving forward...... are we at a place where your motives are sweet polly purebred and his are nefarious? get a fuckin grip, kid. Ron

lilmisssubmiss -> RE: I'm confused - how do you know if someone is just stringing you along? (10/27/2009 10:35:47 AM)
Ok, lol, wow I was just asking what some people thought...you can't blame me for questioning things it's over the net. Of course I said no to meeting right away I held a job before I met them and they had me scheduled to work a lot because a lot of people were planning to be out of town, plus we just started talking...sorry i don't meet people right away after talking to them on here. Guess i'm an idiot huh? - That shouldn't even be an issue. It's just gone on for SO long now i don't know what to think. That's why I asked. Don't tell me to ' get a grip' obviously I have or I wouldn't be posting this asking for opinions. I'm sure anyone else would start to question also if they were in my shoes.

AnimusRex -> RE: I'm confused - how do you know if someone is just stringing you along? (10/27/2009 10:38:41 AM)
This is one of the hardest decisions people have to make; how long to wait until giving up on something. It almost doesn't matter if there really is a house remodel or not; What is clear is that there is something that is occupying his time and energy and making it impossible for him (for the moment) to properly pursue you and integrate you into the family. It could be that this particular couple is not in a position to add a third at this time in their life. The easy suggestion is to talk to him forthrightly; except that it seems thats all there ever is, is talking. I would suggest giving yourself a deadline, and following through.

mnottertail -> RE: I'm confused - how do you know if someone is just stringing you along? (10/27/2009 10:39:10 AM)
If you solicit opinions from your 100 thousand closest advisors at CollarMe, you will occasionally be confronted with an opinion you don't like, you are 18 and may ignore it, as most 18 year olds will, and wait for one that you want to hear... So, how's this? Ja, kick that fuckhead to the curb, baby!!!!!!!!! Ron

lilmisssubmiss -> RE: I'm confused - how do you know if someone is just stringing you along? (10/27/2009 10:43:12 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: mnottertail If you solicit opinions from your 100 thousand closest advisors at CollarMe, you will occasionally be confronted with an opinion you don't like, you are 18 and may ignore it, as most 18 year olds will, and wait for one that you want to hear... So, how's this? Ja, kick that fuckhead to the curb, baby!!!!!!!!! Ron Dude, dude...dude...I get that... and I really hope what you say is TRUE and i'm being impatient. But, truth is I just don't know yet. I'm just saying how you went around saying what you thought wasn't very tactful. That's all I'm saying.

HerLord -> RE: I'm confused - how do you know if someone is just stringing you along? (10/27/2009 10:45:55 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: mnottertail If you solicit opinions from your 100 thousand closest advisors at CollarMe, you will occasionally be confronted with an opinion you don't like, you are 18 and may ignore it, as most 18 year olds will, and wait for one that you want to hear... Ron I must confess Ron, I have missed you. Well, I read all the posts, to this point. Some of them mocking, some with sincere advice, NOT ONE of them worth a damn. Know why, I'll tell you, cause you asked a question that NO ONE can answer FOR you. ONLY you can determine; what you want, what is expected, and what someone ELSE is doing or going to do for you. What you need, is a clue. What that clue will turn out to be, only you will find. Or, not. If you do, you may find this is the dream you dreamed as your daddy's little princess, or maybe that this was just another colossal clusterfuck in your already depressing life. (please note her, i make no presumption of your particular misery, just a format reply to a format question. If you had searched this topic prior to posting, I am positive every answer in this thread has been on at least 50 other threads.) So here is my good luck to ya in a very distressing time in your life. May you you hunting be fruitfull, and your suffering enjoyable. Peace

lilmisssubmiss -> RE: I'm confused - how do you know if someone is just stringing you along? (10/27/2009 10:47:33 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: AnimusRex This is one of the hardest decisions people have to make; how long to wait until giving up on something. It almost doesn't matter if there really is a house remodel or not; What is clear is that there is something that is occupying his time and energy and making it impossible for him (for the moment) to properly pursue you and integrate you into the family. It could be that this particular couple is not in a position to add a third at this time in their life. The easy suggestion is to talk to him forthrightly; except that it seems thats all there ever is, is talking. I would suggest giving yourself a deadline, and following through. Aw, see Ron? This post actually helps solve my problem... Thank you AnimusRex. He said something about after nov 21 because the new house will be liveable.. and they want me to come when it's all in order. So, I guess that's the deadline. I guess if he doesn't follow through with that I should say bye. But, yeah like you said..i guess it really is hard to figure out how long you should wait before you give it up. Thank you for your advice. It was helpful. I will talk to him ...about that being the deadline for sure.

LaTigresse -> RE: I'm confused - how do you know if someone is just stringing you along? (10/27/2009 10:59:37 AM)
And........why not get to know other people, keep your options open, in the mean time? You've not met them, have no idea if he is being honest with you, they've made no commitment to you, nor you to them..........keep them on the short list but don't put all your eggs in one basket either.

HerLord -> RE: I'm confused - how do you know if someone is just stringing you along? (10/27/2009 11:06:43 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: LaTigresse And........why not get to know other people, keep your options open, in the mean time? You've not met them, have no idea if he is being honest with you, they've made no commitment to you, nor you to them..........keep them on the short list but don't put all your eggs in one basket either. And in these forums, whores are as sought after as slaves... so win win! (mandatory disclaimer, Whores in MY book, my favorite women, and fiercest male competition) Go with pain Peace

leadership527 -> RE: I'm confused - how do you know if someone is just stringing you along? (10/27/2009 11:08:01 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: lilmisssubmiss Dude, dude...dude...I get that... and I really hope what you say is TRUE and i'm being impatient. But, truth is I just don't know yet. I'm just saying how you went around saying what you thought wasn't very tactful. That's all I'm saying. chuckles Ron is not Mr. Tact on these boards. He is, however, correct way more often than most of us. My thoughts? After a total of 2 months wherein there is a perfectly plausible and understandable reason why he's been busy, you're wondering if someone is stringing you along? This is exactly why I will never understand older dom's fascination with younger subs. I get it that at your age, time frames are WAY condensed relative to mine. You'll have to make whatever decision seems appropriate to you. To ME, your reasoning process up until now is both self-centered and short-term.

supportourtroops -> RE: I'm confused - how do you know if someone is just stringing you along? (10/27/2009 11:10:18 AM)
You're very rude. Others come here for honest advice and if you have none to give you should shut your pie-hole. She is young and this is new to her and she has every right to talk to others with experience. You help no one and are negative to the community. "Bitch's aren't born, their made"

supportourtroops -> RE: I'm confused - how do you know if someone is just stringing you along? (10/27/2009 11:13:34 AM)
Agreed that AnimusRex gives actual good advice. As to Ron....useless. Don't worry lilmiss I've got your back. Be Safe & Well,

mnottertail -> RE: I'm confused - how do you know if someone is just stringing you along? (10/27/2009 11:14:01 AM)
You are a grown lady posting about the same sort of things as this youth. Thank you for your commentary, you have no idea how that makes me feel. It's all about the love and flowers and sweetly smelling candles, is it? let me write that down, somewhere. Ron

zephyroftheNorth -> RE: I'm confused - how do you know if someone is just stringing you along? (10/27/2009 11:17:08 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: mnottertail You are a grown lady posting about the same sort of things as this youth. Thank you for your commentary, you have no idea how that makes me feel. It's all about the love and flowers and sweetly smelling candles, is it? let me write that down, somewhere. Ron hands Ron a scrap of paper and a crayon helpfulslut

CarrieO -> RE: I'm confused - how do you know if someone is just stringing you along? (10/27/2009 11:25:04 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: supportourtroops She is young and this is new to her and she has every right to talk to others with experience. Actually...a similar post has been made before by the OP almost a year ago http://www.collarchat.com/m_2249985/mpage_1/key_/tm.htm#2249985 If a person doesn't take the time to learn, they're doomed to repeat their mistakes.

LaTigresse -> RE: I'm confused - how do you know if someone is just stringing you along? (10/27/2009 11:25:13 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: supportourtroops You're very rude. Others come here for honest advice and if you have none to give you should shut your pie-hole. She is young and this is new to her and she has every right to talk to others with experience. You help no one and are negative to the community. What community? I rather LIKE Ron's pie hole. Unlike many of the syrupy sugar coated crap on here, he gives good advice......it simply takes a brain to decipher a good deal of it. BTW...........you have a funny white rectangle where one of your holes should be. "Bitch's aren't born, their made" << priceless

mnottertail -> RE: I'm confused - how do you know if someone is just stringing you along? (10/27/2009 11:28:31 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: zephyroftheNorth quote: ORIGINAL: mnottertail You are a grown lady posting about the same sort of things as this youth. Thank you for your commentary, you have no idea how that makes me feel. It's all about the love and flowers and sweetly smelling candles, is it? let me write that down, somewhere. Ron hands Ron a scrap of paper and a crayon helpfulslut Kajira should have written it down for me, in flowery script, and discreetly offered it to me, from a kneeling position. That is all........you'll learn, no whip this time.....but remember, I am somewhat of a useless ass, so you can't tell what I'll do next. Ron

Lucienne -> RE: I'm confused - how do you know if someone is just stringing you along? (10/27/2009 11:30:10 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: LaTigresse BTW...........you have a funny white rectangle where one of your holes should be. "Bitch's aren't born, their made" << priceless 1. lol 2. So priceless, I must know who is being quoted. 3. supportourtroops: 99.9% the guy is not considering you for a LTR TPE relationship. Best of luck!

mnottertail -> RE: I'm confused - how do you know if someone is just stringing you along? (10/27/2009 11:32:13 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: CarrieO quote: ORIGINAL: supportourtroops She is young and this is new to her and she has every right to talk to others with experience. Actually...a similar post has been made before by the OP almost a year ago http://www.collarchat.com/m_2249985/mpage_1/key_/tm.htm#2249985 If a person doesn't take the time to learn, they're doomed to repeat their mistakes. Accordingly, they would have been underage at that time, the profile shows 18 now, or is it in and of itself a wanker? Curiously, Ron

Page: [1] 2 3 4 5 next > >>

Collarchat.com © 2025

Terms of Service

4.699707E-02