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Are men becoming less submissive? - 11/7/2009 8:21:56 PM

AcademyForSlaves

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With the increasing violence in movies, video games, and society, and with the internet being full of porn and giving easy access to wank material, do you find that men are becoming less submissive, more selfish and demanding, and less respectful of Mistresses and all women in general? Are men becoming less submissive and more selfish fetishists?

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RE: Are men becoming less submissive? - 11/7/2009 8:26:12 PM

pyroaquatic

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From: Pyroaquatica
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I would rather take the touch of flesh than something incorporeal any day, thank you.

As for my sense of self-it's growing-as is yours.

To the demands....

I could demand a thousand dollars all day... does not mean I am going to get it. Unless I sacrifice.

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You are what your deep, driving desire is.
As your desire is, so is your will.
As your will is, so is your deed.
As your deed is, so is your destiny.
-Brihadaranyaka Upanishad IV.4.5

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RE: Are men becoming less submissive? - 11/7/2009 8:44:56 PM

AcademyForSlaves

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pyro, on a "leather, wool" post you posted this:

"I tire of the endless tit for tat venomous chat. People striking secret fangs and all of that."

Yet tonight you have followed Me around the forum replying to each one of My posts with a flaming comment.

If you resent Us in some way send it in an email. Please do not use this friendly helpful forum to insult people. Respect that everyone here is different.

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RE: Are men becoming less submissive? - 11/7/2009 8:53:22 PM

littlesarbonn

Posts: 1710
Joined: 12/3/2005
From: Stockton, California
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There are still sincere submissive men out there, just as there are men who never were submissive to begin with. I don't think movie and game violence is changing submissive men. The same men or same type of men generally aren't going to change all that much to become more submissive if there's never been an incentive for them to do so in the first place.

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RE: Are men becoming less submissive? - 11/7/2009 9:01:51 PM

pyroaquatic

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From: Pyroaquatica
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I follow my own lead for now. To where I have posted was of my own random volition and not any real coincidence.

If you are to interpret my comments as 'flaming' then so be it. You have also interpreted my postings as some sort of bombardment personally against you....

and in some instances I was agreeing with you/figuring out what you were saying.

......

I was merely answering questions from my perspective, perspective, perspective.

_____________________________

You are what your deep, driving desire is.
As your desire is, so is your will.
As your will is, so is your deed.
As your deed is, so is your destiny.
-Brihadaranyaka Upanishad IV.4.5

(in reply to AcademyForSlaves)

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RE: Are men becoming less submissive? - 11/7/2009 9:11:01 PM

AcademyForSlaves

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stickman, I agree with your opinion. Indeed some people will be selfish, or violent, regardless of their learnings, surroundings, aging, influences, etc, because they are already drawn to it.

However, some are more easily influenced than others. It is a known fact that some men copycat crime, some even admit to being inspired and influenced by porn magazines and movies. Yes, some movies, books, video games, etc have been known to influence people. It is those who are so easily influenced that concern Me. But you made a good point. Perhaps it is only those who already harbour those interests deep within themselves who can become influenced by evil they see in the world around them.

So the question is still, is this present day violent and selfish world possibly creating more selfishness in some submissive men?

< Message edited by AcademyForSlaves -- 11/7/2009 9:20:34 PM >

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RE: Are men becoming less submissive? - 11/7/2009 9:33:32 PM

azjojoba

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It could be that women are becoming more dominant and assertive, and therefore expect more submission.

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RE: Are men becoming less submissive? - 11/7/2009 9:37:56 PM

cloudboy

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Doesn't your academy keep data on this information?

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RE: Are men becoming less submissive? - 11/7/2009 9:40:43 PM

aladdinsane

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Joined: 7/22/2009
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I disagree. I'm probably being more sub.
The workplace is determined to stamp out my aggressive tendencies, letting my sub side govern my assertive thinking.
And the more I'm on here, the more I learn about how to be a good sub.
But that's just me.

(in reply to cloudboy)

Post #: 9

RE: Are men becoming less submissive? - 11/7/2009 9:52:25 PM

MstrPBK

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Well human dominance and submissiveness has been fully demonstrated to go back in the utter roots of humanity (5.7 million years ago). Our race survived BECAUSE we became more submissive to each other; particularly between males. For this discussion to have any meaning the question has to be turned around to read: Are 'Men' becoming more aggressive - and why?

MstrPBK
St. Paul, MN USA

< Message edited by MstrPBK -- 11/7/2009 10:31:04 PM >

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RE: Are men becoming less submissive? - 11/7/2009 9:56:01 PM

aidan

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What exactly does this:

quote:

ORIGINAL: AcademyForSlaves

With the increasing violence in movies, video games...

have to do with the topic at hand, which is already a pretty weak postulate to begin with?

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RE: Are men becoming less submissive? - 11/7/2009 9:57:25 PM

Aylee

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Fast Reply. . .

Perhaps we are just noticing it more. Certain male behaviours are no longer as socially acceptable as they once were. Certain female behaviours are no longer as socially acceptable as they once were. Certain behaviours for both sexes are now MORE socially acceptable than they once were.

Plus, more of us are now exposed to a wider range of human behaviours and differences than what had previously been the norm.

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RE: Are men becoming less submissive? - 11/7/2009 10:00:41 PM

MarcEsadrian

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quote:

ORIGINAL: AcademyForSlaves

With the increasing violence in movies, video games, and society, and with the internet being full of porn and giving easy access to wank material, do you find that men are becoming less submissive, more selfish and demanding, and less respectful of Mistresses and all women in general? Are men becoming less submissive and more selfish fetishists?

I see overall a decline in manners in both sexes, even from my shallow reference point of the seventies. I know it is the thing to do often in adulthood, to look narrowly upon the younger generations and find error with morals, upbringing, etc., but I'll have nothing to do with that; those my age and above are just as guilty.

As for men, one might say the art of chivalry is a dying one, and with that, naturally, the theater for a man to express submission with civil dignity. It's easy to see why if you care to look around. We have gone to great lengths in marketing iconoclasm to ourselves and raising all things swine as the new "real". Our social retardation overall seems to be increasing, and there are many reasons for this—too many for me to undertake writing about, because if I do I won't leave my chair until 4:00am. For this reason, I hope you forgive my brevity on the matter.

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RE: Are men becoming less submissive? - 11/7/2009 10:01:23 PM

MstrPBK

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To understand the question fully one has to look at both ends of the spectrum.
If one does not do that the discussion is missing something.

MstrPBK
St. Paul, MN USA

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RE: Are men becoming less submissive? - 11/7/2009 10:30:53 PM

Ladylocks

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I don't think that males are becoming less submisssive. I think some dommes out there give the males mixed messages and are confused themselves of what they want. They search for men who are tall and handsome and want a man that is sure of himself, in charge in the real world (NO DOORMATS!!!) but he has to magically feel submissive when she gets that urge to dominate him. She has sex with him like a normal couple and then wonders why he starts acting like her boyfriend instead of her sub. A tall, handsome, sure of himself man usually isn't all that submissive but will play the role to get the girl and when it doesn't work out he is branded a faker or wannabe sub. Then these ladies come on a site like this and complain that there aren't any good male subs. If you want a sub that will last and be loyal search out the shy guys or even (gasp!) someone shorter than you. Go after someone who doesn't have a bunch of girls fawning over him and inflating his ego. Someone who would be grateful that you are giving him attention and allowing him to be with you will be willing to try harder to please you and meet your needs instead of wanting to just get his rocks off. Explain to him right off the bat that he's not your boyfriend and that he never will be. Add protocol to ensure he is reminded of his place. A chastity device keeps you in charge of any sex between you and is a constant reminder of his role in your life.

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RE: Are men becoming less submissive? - 11/7/2009 10:32:59 PM

GYPSYMAMBO

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Joined: 9/26/2009
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quote:

ORIGINAL: AcademyForSlaves

Are men becoming less submissive and more selfish fetishists?

I only know about 200 men and they are not beocming less submissive and selfish...can't say for the other 2 billion or so

GM

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Post #: 16

RE: Are men becoming less submissive? - 11/7/2009 10:35:09 PM

LadyPact

Posts: 32566
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I don't think it's so much that males are becoming less submissive. What's happening, I believe, has a lot to do with the 'new revolution' that is hitting what can be referred to as BDSM. There is this whole new influx of folks who were more or less introduced to us by the media, who have, in a sense, made this the new sensationalism about sex. The media, for reasons of the quest for ratings, ticket sales, venue seats and every other thing, has often looked to what is new and tabboo to make sex seem more exciting in some way. There have been various trends through the decades that come down to one bottom line marketing technique. That is that sex sells, and anything that can make the average person think that the sex they *could* be having, is better than the sex they are getting, sells more.

So, what we have as a result of this is an influx of new people coming into the lifestyle sparked by that idea of better sex. A whole new surge of tops, bottoms, bedroom submissives, and others who are fetish driven and sexually driven. It's not the same kind of drive that you're going to find in the male who actually does have the desire to really serve a Dominant female. The hot sex is the main event and where the focus lies. This can work out really well if two people who want to take their extent of participation to a little slap and tickle in the bedroom, but it's been My observation that Dominant women want more than that.

In My opinion, the ones who are actually effected by this the most isn't us. Sure, we deal with the BS email from the ones who are so focused on their own cocks or their own fetish so bad that it makes Me wonder if they are able to pay enough attention to properly operate an automobile. It's annoying, but it's not a big part of My day.

Who it really effects are the males who really are submissive because they are floating around out there in a sea so full of bottoms that sometimes they are harder to see. They don't always get the chances they should get because there are so many folks out there who have discouraged Dominant women by the time and resources wasted on others. Often, they are being drowned out by the white noise and to Me, that's a real shame.

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RE: Are men becoming less submissive? - 11/7/2009 10:38:30 PM

Venatrix

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Ladylocks

Explain to him right off the bat that he's not your boyfriend and that he never will be. Add protocol to ensure he is reminded of his place. A chastity device keeps you in charge of any sex between you and is a constant reminder of his role in your life.

That may be your idea of a good relationship, but it sure as hell isn't mine: I want a lover, friend, partner-in-crime, and, yes, submissive, all rolled into one. What you describe just leaves me cold.

(in reply to Ladylocks)

Post #: 18

RE: Are men becoming less submissive? - 11/7/2009 10:51:20 PM

Lockit

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Submissive males come in all shapes and sizes and all sorts of appearances. Throughout my life I have had from the not so appealing on the outside to men with Hollywood looks and some who looked exactly like some of the rough and tough guys of Hollywood fame and our dreams. Granted I wasn't calling myself a dominant then, but I was dominant with most men and the men had no problem being lead by my desires.

I think if I were a submissive man hearing that a dominant woman should settle for less than the bomb guy or that less attractive or less secure men are more submissive would be offensive somehow. I saw no difference in appearance and how one acted around me. The men who were my role reversal, house husbands in my twenties were both very, very handsome... one model looks and the other brawny mass all the way. Then I had a huge man... 6'8 and god knows how much that man weighed... I am not sure a regular scale could weigh him... he was dominant with everyone except me. My brother got a real kick out of him catering to me... so did I. lol

It is the person... in my opinion... period, that makes my heart skip a beat and my beast come out. I won't look at submissive men and judge them by how they look and think that will tell me how submissive they will be. I don't want them looking at me and judging what kind of dominant I am.

I really don't think men are less submissive these days. It's just hard to find a good fit... there are good guys and bad guys... just as there are good and bad women. Society changes... but human nature is pretty much the same... self focused and maybe more readily accepted these days. I could hear the same do-me in bars in the seventies that I read online. A rude, sex focused man who doesn't think of anyone but himself is nothing new. lol

< Message edited by Lockit -- 11/7/2009 10:54:49 PM >

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RE: Are men becoming less submissive? - 11/7/2009 10:55:59 PM

Renee7852

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Well said LP. The Internet itself has been a blessing and a curse to the Lifestyle IMHO. 30 years ago the only information I could find on *these crazy ideas I had* was thru Penthouse's Forum magazine or some such publishing, and those were far and few between. Today...with the Internet.....anyone can find a munch/party/ group and be "in the Lifestyle". Often they don't stay long once the newness wears off.

And LadyLocks made a great point when She said "If you want a sub that will last and be loyal search out the shy guys or even (gasp!) someone shorter than you. Go after someone who doesn't have a bunch of girls fawning over him and inflating his ego. Someone who would be grateful that you are giving him attention and allowing him to be with you will be willing to try harder to please you and meet your needs instead of wanting to just get his rocks off. So true!

(in reply to Venatrix)

Post #: 20

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