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This thing called service. - 11/8/2009 1:49:38 PM   
agirl


Posts: 4530
Joined: 6/14/2004
Status: offline 		I was thinking about the thread that pyro started which was headed *Service: A form of Love*....and wondered what service means in a practical sense, to you?

What IS service to you? When you *serve* your dominant, what actual form does it take?

agirl


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RE: This thing called service. - 11/8/2009 1:51:50 PM   
Aileen1968


Posts: 6062
Joined: 12/12/2007
From: I miss Shore, New Jersey
Status: offline 		For me it's all of the mundane things in life. Laundry, picking up his dry cleaning, researching things online that he may want info on, bank deposits, cooking, cleaning. all the things that make his life and our life easier and nicer.

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RE: This thing called service. - 11/8/2009 2:12:31 PM   
agirl


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Status: offline 		Would you say he serves you too , in that way, in that case?

agirl

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RE: This thing called service. - 11/8/2009 2:20:39 PM   
Aileen1968


Posts: 6062
Joined: 12/12/2007
From: I miss Shore, New Jersey
Status: offline 		He doesn't do "household" chores. I wouldn't expect him to nor would I want him to. He helps me with his knowledge of business and he helps me to keep my life running efficiently. He has, on occasion, made me a kick ass dinner. The two of us cooking side by side in the kitchen is a good thing.

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RE: This thing called service. - 11/8/2009 2:21:18 PM   
littlewonder


Posts: 15659
Status: offline 		Service for me is making his life easier in any way that I can be it cooking, cleaning, typing up a report or giving him a bj.

I don't look at the things he does for me as service but more along the lines of when he does things for me it's because he know that an unhappy slave is a useless slave to him so his doing things for me is still a  service to him.

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RE: This thing called service. - 11/8/2009 2:25:06 PM   
RCdc


Posts: 8674
Status: offline 		For myself service has never had anything to do with my submission.  It's just something that everyone does anyway.

the.dark.

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RE: This thing called service. - 11/8/2009 2:57:28 PM   
agirl


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Status: offline 		His *helping* isn't seen as service ....but yours is?

agirl

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RE: This thing called service. - 11/8/2009 2:59:18 PM   
agirl


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quote:

ORIGINAL: littlewonder

Service for me is making his life easier in any way that I can be it cooking, cleaning, typing up a report or giving him a bj.

I don't look at the things he does for me as service but more along the lines of when he does things for me it's because he know that an unhappy slave is a useless slave to him so his doing things for me is still a  service to him.



That seems a little convoluted to me. Are you saying he only does things for you to *serve* himself?

agirl

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RE: This thing called service. - 11/8/2009 3:05:46 PM   
Aileen1968


Posts: 6062
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From: I miss Shore, New Jersey
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quote:

ORIGINAL: agirl

His *helping* isn't seen as service ....but yours is?

agirl



No not really. You originally asked what I viewed as service. I responded that I viewed service as basically household chores. He doesn't do those.
The ways he helps me are tremendous, but they are not anything like doing the laundry. I view service as physical. His helping me is something he can do over the phone or through text. I don't put that in the same category as service. To me that is what he does to help me because he loves me. It doesn't make the workings of the house flow any differently.

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RE: This thing called service. - 11/8/2009 3:09:53 PM   
littlewonder


Posts: 15659
Status: offline 		Well..yeah..I suppose I am. He is the dominant one in our relationship, not me.

When he does something for me it in the end is something that serves him.

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RE: This thing called service. - 11/8/2009 3:10:42 PM   
agirl


Posts: 4530
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Status: offline 		 That's really what I was interested in discussing. He does tons more for me in every way than I have ever done for him.....neither of us call what we *do* for each other *serving*. I was trying to have a peek into what people *see* as their *servy* thing.

agirl

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RE: This thing called service. - 11/8/2009 3:13:32 PM   
agirl


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Aileen1968


quote:

ORIGINAL: agirl

His *helping* isn't seen as service ....but yours is?

agirl



No not really. You originally asked what I viewed as service. I responded that I viewed service as basically household chores. He doesn't do those.
The ways he helps me are tremendous, but they are not anything like doing the laundry. I view service as physical. His helping me is something he can do over the phone or through text. I don't put that in the same category as service. To me that is what he does to help me because he loves me. It doesn't make the workings of the house flow any differently.


Thanks, yes. I can see your view of service. By asking the second question I was trying to clarify your view and you did . You see service as physical stuff.

agirl

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RE: This thing called service. - 11/8/2009 3:15:31 PM   
agirl


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quote:

ORIGINAL: littlewonder

Well..yeah..I suppose I am. He is the dominant one in our relationship, not me.

When he does something for me it in the end is something that serves him.



Thanks for being clear. Do you think that you do things for the same reason?

agirl

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RE: This thing called service. - 11/8/2009 3:17:38 PM   
Aileen1968


Posts: 6062
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From: I miss Shore, New Jersey
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: agirl

quote:

ORIGINAL: Aileen1968


quote:

ORIGINAL: agirl

His *helping* isn't seen as service ....but yours is?

agirl



No not really. You originally asked what I viewed as service. I responded that I viewed service as basically household chores. He doesn't do those.
The ways he helps me are tremendous, but they are not anything like doing the laundry. I view service as physical. His helping me is something he can do over the phone or through text. I don't put that in the same category as service. To me that is what he does to help me because he loves me. It doesn't make the workings of the house flow any differently.


Thanks, yes. I can see your view of service. By asking the second question I was trying to clarify your view and you did . You see service as physical stuff.

agirl



I do. All the other stuff, for me, is basic relationship support ideals. It's what two people do for each other to support them.

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RE: This thing called service. - 11/8/2009 3:20:42 PM   
littlewonder


Posts: 15659
Status: offline 		The things I do for him? Sometimes probably but many times, no. There are times I get absolutely nothing at all from it and there are times I am biting my tongue and have no desire to do something of service for him but I do it because it's what I agreed to and it makes him happy.

I'm not always the happy-go-lucky slave who is always happy with service lol. But overall in general I  like knowing he is happy even if I don't feel that way at that very moment.

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RE: This thing called service. - 11/8/2009 3:34:59 PM   
DesFIP


Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline 		I'm not service oriented. I do things for the people I love. I don't get wet from doing his laundry. Maybe if I'd sit on top of the machine...

I've always thought service oriented people get some kind of a kick from doing for others. I don't.

We both do stuff. He tends to do the more traditional man type jobs, changing the oil in the cars, fixing the brakes, and so on. I do the cooking, he grills. I pick up his socks which are always left all over. But we live together, so we both want to make our life as pleasant as possible. I do the laundry but either he or the kidlet carry the basket up and down stairs, I'm nervous not being able to see over it.

Stuff I enjoy doing are the more cerebral things. Ask me to research something obscure and I have fun. He has no patience trying different keywords for an hour until you hit on what you're looking for. I do. Proofread his letters and make them more elegant (when he lets me),

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RE: This thing called service. - 11/8/2009 3:56:51 PM   
windchymes


Posts: 9410
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Status: offline 		Blow jobs.  Lots and lots of blow jobs.

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RE: This thing called service. - 11/8/2009 4:23:33 PM   
catize


Posts: 3020
Joined: 3/7/2006
Status: offline
quote:

What IS service to you? When you *serve* your dominant, what actual form does it take?




If I am the one doing the laundry and just happen to be in a D/s relationship, I don't see that as service. I see it as something that needed done and I did it. There are plenty of couples outside of D/s where one does more of the housework than the other. The same with meals; we have to eat. As it happens, R. loves to cook so we spend time together in the kitchen. S. doesn't cook and takes me to dinner.

I guess my view of service in my relationships is that they get to decide what we will do and when we will do it and I get to say “Okay!”

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RE: This thing called service. - 11/8/2009 6:26:31 PM   
Hierodule


Posts: 597
Joined: 9/22/2009
Status: offline 		To me service is making sure another person's needs are met before meeting your own. I think in a power exchange relationship you are both meeting each other's needs but there isn't a question about whose needs are usually met first. I don't think one partner's needs come before the other in value, only in chronological order. Also, as a slave, I don't get to continually dictate my needs. I trust him to know whats best for me. So as I serve him he serves me but he gets to determine our needs and which are most important. I don't get to determine his needs. I simply fulfill them.

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RE: This thing called service. - 11/8/2009 6:54:10 PM   
AcademyForSlaves


Posts: 712
Joined: 2/24/2006
Status: offline 		Hi.

I like a sub that loves serving a Mistress. I'm an Assistant Mistress so I like subs serving me by helping me with my office work but some of the Mistresses I am friends with and work with they like subs serving them by serving tea, foot massages, bathing, serving at parties, and other stuff they call servitude. But I like techie subs and writer subs because they help with my office work.

Hope this helps.

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http://www.academyforslaves.com/home.html

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