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Submissives/Slaves/Masochists – Read This Before You ... - 11/16/2009 10:07:25 AM   
howahkan


Posts: 137
Joined: 10/13/2009
Status: offline 		Submissives/Slaves/Masochists – Read This Before You Post!

If you are new to this web site and you have not posted a thread here yet, consider yourself lucky to read this before you post to this forum. 

If you have posted a thread like the one described below go back and edit it if possible.  If you cannot edit it then immediately apologize for posting it.  An unconditional surrender will be expected.

The Mistresses/Domme's in this forum are interest in teaching you the proper way to speak to them.  Listen to them or be prepared to suffer the consequences.  They're a nice group of Ladies but the are Mistresses.  Expect them to act like Mistresses.

The people who setup this web site have inadvertently set a trap for submissives/slaves/masochists .  I could almost be called diabolical except I believe it is unintentional.

We sub's find this really cool web site called CollarMe.com.  "Wow, this is great.  A web site just for me.”  We are encouraged to fill out a profile with almost every kink we have.  “Wow, This is so cool.”.  Eventually we find the Message Boards.  What is the next thing we sub's see?  Ask a Mistress.

“Ask a Mistress, Wow this is great.  I'll just give them a big long list of everything I like, they'll see it and they'll all like me and want to talk to me.”

WARNING, WARNING, RED ALERT, WRONG THING TO DO ! ! ! ! !

What I am about to tell you should be in the posting rules for this board, however, for whatever reason this information has not been included.

Take it from a sub who has done everything above.  The Mistress in this forum are so sick of this kind of post, you will be merciless flamed, sliced-n-diced, hacked to death and criticized until you cry by some of them, if not all of them.

I respectfully request the Mistresses/Domme's who post in this forum to please reply to this thread and give us some idea of what they look for and what they will reply to when a sub posts a thread in this forum.  I respectfully ask all Mistresses/Domme's who want reply to do so, even if it get's a bit repetitive.  If for no other reason to let us sub's know that you all want the same thing, Respect...

Please remember that these are Mistresses.  If you ask a question here you can expect to get an answer.  It just may not be the answer you wanted.  Keep it kinky but be respectful.

Note: Everyone, please post to this thread from time to time and try to keep it on the first page to save everyone from this kind of unnecessary annoyance to the Mistresses and heartache for sub's.

May all of our dreams and fantasies come true...  Keep it kinky...

Profile   Post #: 1
RE: Submissives/Slaves/Masochists – Read This Before ... - 11/16/2009 10:23:57 AM   
Lockit


Posts: 11292
Joined: 5/7/2007
Status: offline 		I do not believe that the site was set up in such a way as to ignorantly set anyone up. We are all adults and are responsible for ourselves. People are people, no matter what they will do what people do. It is not just the dominant's that will jump someone's bones for acting as some people do, asking for answers to questions or any other thing. In the threads, you will get answers, good, bad, slam dunks, slice and dice, encouragement and on and on, by all types of people, not just one group or those that the heading of the section discribe.

People should think about what they post before they start a thread. Going on emotion, desire, fetish or anything that would prompt someone to correct something they see as foolish, silly, questionable, self focused in a sexual manner that isn't a complete or balanced thing which includes far more than self or someone coming with relationship issues that isn't in a balanced emotional place is going to hear what people think of that. That is the purpose of a message board and anyone who doesn't consider that many will read and respond and could respond in many ways, are fooling themselves.

Be adult, be accountable, be reasonable and don't play a game of ignorance to justify some behavior that makes you act out rather than be adult, accountable and reasonable. It isn't rocket science and warnings typically don't work because people tend to fail to be adult, accountable, reasonable and do tend to play games in their own life and with others. Use some common sense and be aware or face what comes of not being so.

< Message edited by Lockit -- 11/16/2009 10:27:35 AM >

_____________________________

No matter how old a woman gets, some men will think she was born yesterday! ROFL... I love this place!


(in reply to howahkan)
Profile   Post #: 2
RE: Submissives/Slaves/Masochists – Read This Before ... - 11/16/2009 10:25:57 AM   
BitaTruble


Posts: 9779
Joined: 1/12/2006
From: Texas
Status: offline 		::sighs:: You just do not get it. Forget all the labels, forget about kowtowing and trying to make some sort of impression. The ladies here are people.. you know, simply humans? A little common courtesy will take you much further than trying to guess what the "Mistresses" here all want. Seriously. People. k? Any "Mistress" here who expects that acting like a "Mistress" will get her very far is just as likely to get her ass handed to her on a platter. I don't know what your deal is, but I think you are spending way too much time in Second Life and forgetting how to deal with your first life .. the one which actually counts for something.

Treat the people here like people and you'll do okay. Treat the people here like a blow-up doll or fleshy flogger.. not so much.

< Message edited by BitaTruble -- 11/16/2009 10:26:40 AM >

_____________________________

"Oh, so it's just like
Rock, paper, scissors."

He laughed. "You are the wisest woman I know."


(in reply to howahkan)
Profile   Post #: 3
RE: Submissives/Slaves/Masochists – Read This Before ... - 11/16/2009 10:29:33 AM   
songstory


Posts: 1
Joined: 11/13/2009
Status: offline 		I suggest you review the rule for the use of apostrophes.
I can't take people seriously if they can't spell or use correct grammar and punctuation.
I know this opinion isn't popular these days, but it's mine.

Song

(in reply to howahkan)
Profile   Post #: 4
RE: Submissives/Slaves/Masochists – Read This Before ... - 11/16/2009 10:34:09 AM   
MsStarlett


Posts: 1879
Joined: 12/23/2007
Status: offline

_____________________________

It is by caffeine alone I set my mind in motion.
It is by the beans of Java that thoughts acquire speed,
the hands acquire shakes, the shakes become a warning,
It is by caffeine alone I set my mind in motion.

(in reply to songstory)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: Submissives/Slaves/Masochists – Read This Before ... - 11/16/2009 10:40:18 AM   
LadyPact


Posts: 32566
Status: offline 		Ah, again, it is all about the other side of the kneel.....

Let Me even highlight this again.  "Wow, this is great.  A web site just for me.”  And even further:  “Ask a Mistress, Wow this is great.  I'll just give them a big long list of everything I like, they'll see it and they'll all like me and want to talk to me.” Yeah, that might work at the fetish delivery service, but it's probably not going to fly here.

For the sake of principle, here you go.  It took all of three mouse clicks to find threads that were started on the premise that this isn't really all focused from those who chose the collar.

http://www.collarchat.com/m_2898000/tm.htm  "Why do Dommes cheat" by youngsubgeoff

http://www.collarchat.com/m_2904865/tm.htm  "Send ProfileFeature:  A Good First Step?"  by snowranger

http://www.collarchat.com/m_2893476/tm.htm  "Hobbies and Interests"  by DVsFox

http://www.collarchat.com/m_2884093/tm.htm  "Have You Ever Scared A Sub Too Much"  by peonforher

http://www.collarchat.com/m_2884093/tm.htm  "How to Find a non pro domme"  by Desiretobesub

http://www.collarchat.com/m_2849375/tm.htm  "OK boys, Get Out Your Sewing Machines"  by Ottersswim


How ironic that some of the authors of the threads listed above have time and time again by praised by many on this board for participating in intelligent discussions.






_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

(in reply to howahkan)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: Submissives/Slaves/Masochists – Read This Before ... - 11/16/2009 10:44:55 AM   
howahkan


Posts: 137
Joined: 10/13/2009
Status: offline 		To Lockit and BitaTruble,

I respect your point of view.  Your replies are always welcome.  I must respectfully disagree.  As I have experienced, life sometimes does not go the way you expect.  For some people they find this web site and they may overreact.

SUB FRENZY: A very strong, sometimes overwhelming, desire to find a dominant partner or to become immersed in BDSM-related activities, sometimes seen in people who identify strongly as submissive, particularly people who have either just newly discovered their submissive side or who have not partaken in BDSM-related activities for a long time. People in the grip of sub frenzy may sometimes make unwise or unsafe choices.

I ask you to reconsider and please help with this.

(in reply to Lockit)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: Submissives/Slaves/Masochists – Read This Before ... - 11/16/2009 10:51:13 AM   
howahkan


Posts: 137
Joined: 10/13/2009
Status: offline 		LadyPact - I know you don't like me.  I am only trying to help.  I can see that my effort has fallen on deaf ears and it has already been killed.  Nothing I do here will ever be accepted.  You win, I'll give up.  Sorry...

(in reply to LadyPact)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: Submissives/Slaves/Masochists – Read This Before ... - 11/16/2009 10:59:58 AM   
LaTigresse


Posts: 26123
Joined: 1/15/2006
Status: offline 		Please insert eye roll here.

And........what Bita said.


_____________________________

My twisted, self deprecating, sense of humour, finds alot to laugh about, in your lack of one!

Just because you are well educated, articulate, and can use big, fancy words, properly........does not mean you are right!

(in reply to howahkan)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: Submissives/Slaves/Masochists – Read This Before ... - 11/16/2009 11:11:32 AM   
Lockit


Posts: 11292
Joined: 5/7/2007
Status: offline 		Howahkan, you talk about sub frenzy. From what I remember, your first posts were not coming from sub frenzy. They were coming from an escape you were wishing to make from a current relationship that has gone sour for whatever reasons. You were trying to start something before something else was finished. You also were blaming, hurt, angry and projecting without seeing your part in the crisis within your relationship that you wished to escape from, to the point of mentioning finding someone... a dominant... that wouldn't be for life, but one who would understand and help you.

You were not aware of your own emotional need for balance being caught up in pain and anger. You were called on the things you said and you didn't like that. You tried to balance out a bit and for a bit you did... but... as most wounded people do... they fall back into it. They go in and out... sad and okay, sad and okay until they find their way.

One thing... in all of this... you didn't like how you were treated again... add to the wife and bam you are again on a mission to point a finger, lay blame and play the victim now out to save the other victims.

You have presented yourself in such a way that even those who encouraged you and tried to believe in you somehow are at a point where they must wait to see the growth in you because you are far too wounded, angry, acting passive aggressively and blaming from one moment to the next. Enough... go heal before you have more you will feel you must say you are sorry for. Enough.

< Message edited by Lockit -- 11/16/2009 11:14:24 AM >

_____________________________

No matter how old a woman gets, some men will think she was born yesterday! ROFL... I love this place!


(in reply to LaTigresse)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: Submissives/Slaves/Masochists – Read This Before ... - 11/16/2009 11:18:56 AM   
LadyPact


Posts: 32566
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: howahkan

LadyPact - I know you don't like me.  I am only trying to help.  I can see that my effort has fallen on deaf ears and it has already been killed.  Nothing I do here will ever be accepted.  You win, I'll give up.  Sorry...


It has nothing to do with whether I like you personally or not.  You asked a question and I gave you an honest answer.  Whether you liked it or not has even less bearing than what I happen to think of you.

The only person you are trying to help here is you. 



ETA....  By the way, this
SUB FRENZY: A very strong, sometimes overwhelming, desire to find a dominant partner or to become immersed in BDSM-related activities, sometimes seen in people who identify strongly as submissive, particularly people who have either just newly discovered their submissive side or who have not partaken in BDSM-related activities for a long time. People in the grip of sub frenzy may sometimes make unwise or unsafe choices.

Tell you what.  Take that same paragraph and post it in the submissive section.  Read the replies of the scores of submissives, male and female, who will be more than willing to tell you that sub frenzy is no excuse or rationalization for lacking common sense. 


< Message edited by LadyPact -- 11/16/2009 11:22:29 AM >

_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

(in reply to howahkan)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: Submissives/Slaves/Masochists – Read This Before ... - 11/16/2009 11:32:23 AM   
Lockit


Posts: 11292
Joined: 5/7/2007
Status: offline 		howahkan... do not lash out at me because I answer your thread and posts with how I see things. If you cannot say that to me on the thread and must do it hidden... you only confirm that I am correct. You are angry and wounded and striking out. In more ways than one. If you don't like what I have to say... stop posting things that I am free to speak about in an open and public forum.

And... a real friend is not an enabler... they speak the truth and hope for the best. They don't coddle or make it easy by taking anything you decide is okay to do if it isn't okay to do.

< Message edited by Lockit -- 11/16/2009 11:34:30 AM >

_____________________________

No matter how old a woman gets, some men will think she was born yesterday! ROFL... I love this place!


(in reply to LadyPact)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: Submissives/Slaves/Masochists – Read This Before ... - 11/16/2009 11:43:33 AM   
LaTigresse


Posts: 26123
Joined: 1/15/2006
Status: offline 		I know I got a less than impressive email from a sad, pathetic and bitter individual.

Insert a dozen or so, more eye rolls.


_____________________________

My twisted, self deprecating, sense of humour, finds alot to laugh about, in your lack of one!

Just because you are well educated, articulate, and can use big, fancy words, properly........does not mean you are right!

(in reply to Lockit)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: Submissives/Slaves/Masochists – Read This Before ... - 11/16/2009 12:18:42 PM   
LadyPact


Posts: 32566
Status: offline 		So I take it the email in My box probably isn't worth My time?

_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

(in reply to LaTigresse)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: Submissives/Slaves/Masochists – Read This Before ... - 11/16/2009 12:24:25 PM   
mnottertail


Posts: 60698
Joined: 11/3/2004
Status: offline 		Why? Were you hopin' for a 'Nice Outfit!!!!!' or.............?

_____________________________

Have they not divided the prey; to every man a damsel or two? Judges 5:30


(in reply to LadyPact)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: Submissives/Slaves/Masochists – Read This Before ... - 11/16/2009 12:36:31 PM   
LaTigresse


Posts: 26123
Joined: 1/15/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact

So I take it the email in My box probably isn't worth My time?


I would guess no. I see I have another and it will likely get deleted unread.


_____________________________

My twisted, self deprecating, sense of humour, finds alot to laugh about, in your lack of one!

Just because you are well educated, articulate, and can use big, fancy words, properly........does not mean you are right!

(in reply to LadyPact)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: Submissives/Slaves/Masochists – Read This Before ... - 11/16/2009 12:47:15 PM   
howahkan


Posts: 137
Joined: 10/13/2009
Status: offline 		This has all become to hard.  You all have succeeded in breaking my spirit.  I give up on everything.  goodbye.

(in reply to mnottertail)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: Submissives/Slaves/Masochists – Read This Before ... - 11/16/2009 1:03:34 PM   
LadyPact


Posts: 32566
Status: offline 		Now that would make Me one hell of a powerful person, wouldn't it?  The ability to break the spirit of someone that I have never met and had no personal connection to whatsoever.  Just think of the power.  I could rule the world just by typing things up on a message board!  I could rule the world!! Mawahahahaha!!! 

Seriously, if it takes that little to break the spirit, there's some growth that needs to happen.


_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

(in reply to howahkan)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: Submissives/Slaves/Masochists – Read This Before ... - 11/16/2009 1:06:10 PM   
aphotic


Posts: 119
Joined: 5/17/2009
Status: offline 		They have pills that make the evil demons under your bed go away, too!

I think most people have dealt with infidelity, flakes, and flat-out liars throughout their lives; thus, people have walls and a way of generalizing people based on the first sniff of the past. I'm not saying all the people in the world are damaged, but everyone's been hurt or spurned at some point.

However, anytime you approach anything--expecting a positive response--it's on you to ensure that their wall doesn't go up. It's on you as the writer or instigator to differentiate yourself and make a clear, concise point.

Maybe you wouldn't find the "blasting" side of people if your best defense wasn't return fire.

If you want dreams and fantasies, you're simply going to have to open a book and sprinkle some fairy dust. FFS, ever read a fairy tale (since you mentioned dreams and fantasies)? Snow white had to make friends with the dwarves; Cinderella had to worry about turning back into rags; Romeo found love out of his despair from a previous relationship and you get the point.

Appealing to individuals is hard, let alone addressing a forum full of varying opinions. This isn't the best attempt to exculpate yourself from your actions.

< Message edited by aphotic -- 11/16/2009 1:07:06 PM >

(in reply to howahkan)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: Submissives/Slaves/Masochists – Read This Before ... - 11/16/2009 1:16:05 PM   
LaTigresse


Posts: 26123
Joined: 1/15/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: howahkan

This has all become to hard.  You all have succeeded in breaking my spirit.  I give up on everything.  goodbye.



Oh for crying out loud! Put on your big boy drawers and DEAL!


_____________________________

My twisted, self deprecating, sense of humour, finds alot to laugh about, in your lack of one!

Just because you are well educated, articulate, and can use big, fancy words, properly........does not mean you are right!

(in reply to howahkan)
Profile   Post #: 20
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