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RE: Death and Dying - 11/22/2009 9:22:53 AM   
sexyred1


Posts: 8998
Joined: 8/9/2007
Status: offline 		Lushy, I just saw this thread. I am so sorry and my heart goes out to you. I will write you on the other side.

Hugs...

(in reply to DarkSteven)
Profile   Post #: 41
RE: Death and Dying - 11/22/2009 9:54:00 AM   
lronitulstahp


Posts: 5392
Joined: 10/17/2007
Status: offline 		i just finished talking with Lushy. i am so glad to know her as the strong, smart, capable tough cookie underneath her bubbly exterior. i think people miss out some of her facets, and a large part of what i love about her i'm sure, is due to the fact that she was raised by a woman of strength, toughness and tenacity.

In Memoriam:

יִתְגַּדַּל וְיִתְקַדַּשׁ שְׁמֵהּ רַבָּא.
בְּעָלְמָא דִּי בְרָא כִרְעוּתֵהּ
וְיַמְלִיךְ מַלְכוּתֵהּ
וְיַצְמַח פֻּרְקָנֵהּ וִיקָרֵב(קיץ) מְשִׁיחֵהּ
בְּחַיֵּיכוֹן וּבְיוֹמֵיכוֹן
וּבְחַיֵּי דְכָל בֵּית יִשְׂרָאֵל
בַּעֲגָלָא וּבִזְמַן קָרִיב. וְאִמְרוּ אָמֵן
יְהֵא שְׁמֵהּ רַבָּא מְבָרַךְ
לְעָלַם וּלְעָלְמֵי עָלְמַיָּא
יִתְבָּרַךְ וְיִשְׁתַּבַּח וְיִתְפָּאַר וְיִתְרוֹמַם
וְיִתְנַשֵּׂא וְיִתְהַדָּר וְיִתְעַלֶּה וְיִתְהַלָּל
שְׁמֵהּ דְקֻדְשָׁא בְּרִיךְ הוּא.
לְעֵלָּא (לְעֵלָּא מִכָּל) מִן כָּל בִּרְכָתָא
וְשִׁירָתָא תֻּשְׁבְּחָתָא וְנֶחֱמָתָא
דַּאֲמִירָן בְּעָלְמָא. וְאִמְרוּ אָמֵן

_____________________________

Truth is, everybody is going to hurt you; you just gotta find the ones worth suffering for." -Bob Marley

(in reply to sexyred1)
Profile   Post #: 42
RE: Death and Dying - 11/22/2009 1:47:55 PM   
lusciouslips19


Posts: 9792
Joined: 9/8/2007
Status: offline 		I wish I could put all of you in my pocket and carry you with me. Your support means so much.

_____________________________

Original Pimpette,
Keeper of Original Home Flag and Fire of Mr. Lance Hughes
Charter member of Lance's Fag Hags,
Member of the Subbie Mafia
Princess of typos and it's my prerogative

(in reply to lronitulstahp)
Profile   Post #: 43
RE: Death and Dying - 11/22/2009 2:23:16 PM   
lauren0221


Posts: 681
Joined: 8/29/2006
Status: offline 		Sending love and prayers to you and your family, lushy.

(in reply to lusciouslips19)
Profile   Post #: 44
RE: Death and Dying - 11/22/2009 2:26:23 PM   
purepleasure


Posts: 6941
Joined: 4/9/2004
From: Lehigh Valley, PA
Status: offline 		Lushy,

I am so sorry. Take peace in that she no longer suffers. Tuesday will be the 2 year anniversary of my mother's passing. While this is not the best time of year to have to say goodbye to loved ones, it does get easier, as time moves on.

Prayers of peace and comfort to you and yours.

< Message edited by purepleasure -- 11/22/2009 2:31:14 PM >

_____________________________

Patience, grasshopper.

Your stupidity does not impress me.

blame it on your hormones!!! - beerbug aka ydd

(in reply to lusciouslips19)
Profile   Post #: 45
RE: Death and Dying - 11/22/2009 4:09:11 PM   
LinnaeaBorealis


Posts: 8595
Joined: 10/5/2008
From: Insanity & beyond
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: lusciouslips19

I wish I could put all of you in my pocket and carry you with me. Your support means so much.


I wrap you in my arms, my darling Princess.  I don't have the words to express how I feel right now, so a gesture will have to do.  Stay strong, lady.  Your life was enriched by having your mother in it & my life has been enriched from having her daughter in mine.  I love you T   H    I    S  BIG!!!!!

_____________________________

Ring the bells that still can ring
Forget your perfect offering
There is a crack in everything
That's how the light gets in
~~L. Cohen

Just one of the yahoo's

(in reply to lusciouslips19)
Profile   Post #: 46
RE: Death and Dying - 11/22/2009 5:02:08 PM   
zephyroftheNorth


Posts: 8159
Joined: 10/5/2009
From: The Great Frozen North
Status: offline 		Oh Lushy sweetie I soooo wish I were there to help you through this. Words just don't convey how sorry I am for your loss.

{{{{{{HUGS}}}}}

Zeph


_____________________________

And there's a smile when the pain comes
The pain gonna make ev'rything alright ~ Black Crows

Team Troll Trollop
Member: Cocksuckers For World Peace
Charter member: Lance's Fag Hags
Member: Subbie Mafia
Member: Hibbie's Hotties

(in reply to LinnaeaBorealis)
Profile   Post #: 47
RE: Death and Dying - 12/30/2009 9:02:14 AM   
MistressSamirah


Posts: 7
Joined: 3/29/2008
From: bklyn,nyc
Status: offline 		Just be with your mom !
The cna in me said be close to her my pray goes out to you !

(in reply to lusciouslips19)
Profile   Post #: 48
RE: Death and Dying - 12/30/2009 9:14:54 AM   
Rule


Posts: 10479
Joined: 12/5/2005
Status: offline 		I have read parts of this thread only just now.

May the God of the Dead reward your mother according to her merits.

Take heart. My best wishes for you.

(in reply to lusciouslips19)
Profile   Post #: 49
RE: Death and Dying - 12/30/2009 9:43:12 AM   
lusciouslips19


Posts: 9792
Joined: 9/8/2007
Status: offline 		Its been a month since her passing. In some ways easier, in others harder. Sometimes fine, other times waves of sadness wash over.

I want to thank Holly for the poem she posted. I read it and even a rabbi wanted a copy. There is a poem my rabbi friend read called Dash. Basically said, its not the day of birth on the tombstone or the day of death on the tombstone but how they lived the dash. My mom did that dash like no others. NAd she looked like a beauty queen doing it. 350 people came to pay their respects at her funeral. many more for 7 days of condolences. That shows a lot about the woman she was.

I posted this in the announcement thread of her death. and I read this as part of her eulogy. It was done by 2 rabbis, one who was a friend of mine and my 2 sisters. It seems fitting to put it here too, Someone may read it and not only see how I grew but also may take comfort in it when they have to come to this place with a loved one.

Lessons Learned by me

In the passed year my family has been through much. We all questioned at one time or
another if there is a God. How could there be a God? How could God take such a
vibrant alive healthy woman and take her from us in such a way? I was confused depressed and angry until some recent aha moments.

God is in the connections that we have with people. God is in the friends who rallied around. God is in the pride that I feel for my family. I saw a side to my father I was not aware of before. He had strength. He was devoted to my mother to her last breath. My sisters were strong capable women there every step of the way. My family came together like I have never witnessed before. We are WAY less dysfuctional! We learned how precious every moment is. We left nothing unsaid.

The irony is not lost on me. My mother the social butterfly lost her ability to speak. She had to put down her phone. While we were growing up my mother was not a demonstrative person. She was not a huggy feely touchy person. But in the end thats what she had. All she had was touches and gestures and hugs. And in the end she became what we never had before. I believe a healing took place for us and for her as we appreciated and demonstrated our love. So perhaps this was the gift god gave to her daughter s and her husband and the lesson she also learned before being taken to the other side. And now God has the gift. Perhaps the angels need scarves and blankets! (she knit to the very end)






< Message edited by lusciouslips19 -- 12/30/2009 9:46:46 AM >

_____________________________

Original Pimpette,
Keeper of Original Home Flag and Fire of Mr. Lance Hughes
Charter member of Lance's Fag Hags,
Member of the Subbie Mafia
Princess of typos and it's my prerogative

(in reply to Rule)
Profile   Post #: 50
RE: Death and Dying - 12/30/2009 2:24:35 PM   
JstAnotherSub


Posts: 6174
Status: offline 		so sorry for your loss hon.......yesterday was 9 year anniversary of the day i held my mom as she left this world.   it is the most spiritual thing i have ever experienced and i wouldnt take a million dollars for the experience.

all i can say is cry when you want to and laugh when you can.....the grief is a process and trying to speed it up or fight it is useless, imho.

may you find moments of peace when you need them and comfort when they desert you....

_____________________________

yep

(in reply to lusciouslips19)
Profile   Post #: 51
RE: Death and Dying - 12/31/2009 7:56:08 AM   
Termyn8or


Posts: 18681
Joined: 11/12/2005
Status: offline 		Total jumpthrough

"Any comforting words on spirituality would be most welcomed."

Well maybe not so comforting, but why do you know how long ? That is the worst thing doctors do, project the end of life. And I ask, did you ask, if so why ?

Take any moments you can, those times may be rare, but when they are cognizant, cherish every moment you can get, because it is all you are getting no matter what.

When the time comes to let them go, let go. If they ever cared one ounce about you that is what they would want you to do. The memories live on. Through those memories they live on. Mourn, but get over it. Not easy, I did not say it was, but you must.

If you get one minute, cherish it. Remember, they could've gotten run over by a speeding bus twenty years ago. Be thankful for the time you did get and express that.

Take it from someone who for many years, knew more dead people than alive. (and NO I did not kill them) If you want proof I can supply a list of names and you can find out that many died when I was in my mid to late twenties and early thirties.

Do not focus on the death, focus on the life. Or you could go insane if you prefer.

T

(in reply to lusciouslips19)
Profile   Post #: 52
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