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RE: Collar vs wedding ring - 2/11/2009 10:45:18 PM   
evelinggirl


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I would say they fall under different categories in my opinion. 

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RE: Collar vs wedding ring - 2/12/2009 8:28:54 AM   
sparkyRBF


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For me, the commitment level is the same.  marriage though is recognized legally and makes it easier to like get on his insurance, bank account, taxes etc. 

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RE: Collar vs wedding ring - 2/12/2009 10:49:15 AM   
agirl


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I view them as entirely different. A wedding requires both to put their money where their mouths are and get legally entangled. It's one thing to commit to someone emotionally and another legally. No matter how much weight I put on the fact that I'm owned and collared, it doesn't have the breadth of a wedding ring. One has the weight of responsibility , the other has the weight of the law as well as.

It's been said before but if collars held the same amount of legal entanglement , there'd be a lot fewer of them.

agirl




< Message edited by agirl -- 2/12/2009 10:50:59 AM >

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RE: Collar vs wedding ring - 2/12/2009 11:45:04 AM   
oceanwynds


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I still have my wedding band, but never really wore it through our marriage, and he didnt wear his. We were odd and didnt find symbols important. After hubby died, I found another person who is not into symbols and does not want to collar me. I am happy. Neither are important to me.

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RE: Collar vs wedding ring - 2/12/2009 11:55:22 AM   
LaTigresse


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Interesting old thread revival. Where is Level hiding lately?!?!?!

Wedding band/collar...........two completely different animals in my book.


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RE: Collar vs wedding ring - 2/12/2009 5:11:58 PM   
LookieNoNookie


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Level


quote:

ORIGINAL: ownedgirlie

i see them as very different but of equal importance.


Playing the devil's advocate here heh heh ........could you give one or the other up? You don't have to answer, btw, I don't intend any of this to start trouble with anyone's home life.


(Bastage....I sense trouble).

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RE: Collar vs wedding ring - 2/12/2009 5:33:50 PM   
TreasureKY


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Fast Reply:

A very old thread revived... nevertheless...

My inter-personal relationship with Firm wouldn't be any different if we were married... just as it's not any different even though we aren't married.  I do, however, see "collaring" to be less of a commitment than marriage.  I realize that there are many who would disagree with that.  *shrugs*  Just my opinion and I have reasons for it.

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RE: Collar vs wedding ring - 2/12/2009 5:56:36 PM   
KatyLied


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quote:

I do, however, see "collaring" to be less of a commitment than marriage.  I realize that there are many who would disagree with that. *shrugs* Just my opinion and I have reasons for it.


I personally think that marriage is a huge commitment.  And I agree with you.  My reasons for it are because it is legally binding.  A collar is not.  This is not to say that you can't have a committed, significant relationship outside of a collaring and/or marriage. 


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RE: Collar vs wedding ring - 3/6/2009 8:09:42 PM   
marysdream


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i take collaring very seriously! and see this as a deeper commitment then marriage..if done right and taken seriously!
ree

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RE: Collar vs wedding ring - 3/6/2009 8:29:48 PM   
DavanKael


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Another old thread revived and I'm not weeding through all of the posts to see if I have posted already. 
In my strange little Universe, a collar and wedding band would be synonymous of an equivalent commitment. 
  Davan

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RE: Collar vs wedding ring - 3/7/2009 12:38:06 AM   
Christinestill


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well hell, here i got all excited for a second thinking Level was back. 

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RE: Collar vs wedding ring - 3/11/2009 4:19:14 PM   
magicescape


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ImO they are both are important. i have been collared but not married. i would like both, but each represent differnet aspects of the relationship with you and Master. beautfiul question tho

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RE: Collar vs wedding ring - 3/11/2009 5:43:19 PM   
domiguy


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Again....Getting back to the "Gift" bullshit thread....If anyone thinks that a collar is on par with a wedding ring...You are my kind of gal.   I dig your shit and the way you think.  I agree 100%. 

If I collar a woman I am in it for the long haul.  My experience with the "long haul" is that it tends to exhaust itself somewhere between twelve and ninety six months.

Nothing is as precious as having my insignificant other drag me into court and present her "collar" as proof to the depth of our once committed relationship as she now demands fifty percent of my shit.  Hearing the judge and the court reporter giggle is truly priceless.

It moves me to tears.  But at heart, I'm just a softy.

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RE: Collar vs wedding ring - 3/11/2009 6:07:45 PM   
pinkwind


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i find it funny, in a way, that some see a wedding ring as having way more import than a collar in a relationship.

There is no need for a wedding ring, no legal requirement to have a wedding band. It's the signature on the certificate that binds the people concerned together in a legal sense.

No matter whether one marries or not, no piece of jewellery will stop one or other party from breaking the commitment to any relationship. And judging by the divorce rate it seems that a legal document and the entangling of finance and family does not hold as much sway as it used to.

Collar or wedding ring, both have as much importance as the parties who give and receive them invest in them.



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RE: Collar vs wedding ring - 3/11/2009 7:29:26 PM   
popeye1250


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Level

Just curious about how others feel on this........do you see a collar as being equal to, less than, or more valuable than a wedding ring? Or do you even see the two as being in the same category?

Level



I see them as equal.
I'd offer a collar first and then a ring to more fully own my slave.

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RE: Collar vs wedding ring - 3/11/2009 7:39:09 PM   
PapaJohnQ


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C'mon! Don't tell everyone that!  I have been flabergasting them with brilliance or baffeling them with B.S. all my life!  If they find out the truth - damn girl - the truth might make them free!

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RE: Collar vs wedding ring - 3/11/2009 7:52:41 PM   
PapaJohnQ


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Domiguy  I hope you don't live in California.  The Courts there are very kind to ladies what have shacked for more than a part of your time limit.

In Indiana, The state law givers rescinded common-law-marriage with the intent of rewarding church goers who legally married.  Then for them what done it, they reached into the official records of the state and replaced birth certificates of out of wedlock kids with evidence that they were born in Wedlock, "legitamising" birth.  You might gues what that did to laws which treated born in wedlock and out of wedlock heirs.  I would guess a collar has a choke hold on wedlock, but maybe only in California, and probably none of this applies to the bay area!.

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RE: Collar vs wedding ring - 3/12/2009 2:48:18 PM   
AnnaOfAramis


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quote:

ORIGINAL: slavejali

They mean different things to me too and see them both of significant importance.

To answer the question you posed to ownedgirlie: I could give my collar up before my wedding ring. Reasons:

1. My collar is representative of my slavery to Master. It represents an intimate, private, inner commitment to a Master/slave relationship. Its not there to advertise to the world what Master and my relationship is...it represents something to us, privately.

2. My wedding ring represents Master and my relationship and union to the outside world. Everyday people can look at my finger and comment "Oh your married"...which in essence means that I'm owned, or claimed.

3. Wedding ring is a worldly (external) thing to me, a collar is an internal thing...so to give up my *collar* would make no difference whatsoever, that internal reality of Master and my connection would still be there.

quote:

They mean different things to me too and see them both of significant importance.

To answer the question you posed to ownedgirlie: I could give my collar up before my wedding ring. Reasons:

1. My collar is representative of my slavery to Master. It represents an intimate, private, inner commitment to a Master/slave relationship. Its not there to advertise to the world what Master and my relationship is...it represents something to us, privately.

2. My wedding ring represents Master and my relationship and union to the outside world. Everyday people can look at my finger and comment "Oh your married"...which in essence means that I'm owned, or claimed.

3. Wedding ring is a worldly (external) thing to me, a collar is an internal thing...so to give up my *collar* would make no difference whatsoever, that internal reality of Master and my connection would still be there.


I was going to post and then I saw this, which is almost exactly what I would have said! My Master recently asked me to marry him. It was an issue for him for awhile, he vacillated because he wanted to marry me but he worried that if we married I would want to be a "wife" and that would mean rights and would perhaps interfere with my slavery to him. But I don't see it this way. For one thing, my view of being his wife is more of the middle ages style- ie chattel. To me, as you say, I am his slave, and as his wife, it is simply another extension of his ownership- one that is recognized legally, and an ownership that is recognized by vanilla people. I have always hated trying to explain my relationship with him to vanilla people. "Boyfriend" does not come anywhere close to "Master." "Fiance" is working much better for me :) And though I wear my collar all the time, there have been occasions where it has to be removed temporarily. And even without it, though I miss it greatly, I feel no less his and know the true collar is worn round my heart, the neck collar being only a symbol.

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RE: Collar vs wedding ring - 3/16/2009 12:02:46 AM   
goodgirl85


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As a sub, I couldn't submit fully to someone I didn't love and trust completely. I have been with Sir for a year and a half. I am BOTH His girlfriend and His sub, the role I play depends on the audience watching and in small ways I make sure my girlfriend role is still my sub role.

Neither of us plan on marrying,,, ever, both for different reasons but it works for us.

But a collar.... a collar I would like. To me, collaring is like marriage. This fits with my personal reasons for not getting married. I don't need a piece of paper to tell me that I love Him or He loves me. A collar is a not so legal marriage in my eyes. Its a symbol not just of His ownership of me, but of our love for each other.

I suppose a collar isn't so important either in the scheme of things, I know I am His, and I know our love for each other is great, but at the same time, again for my personal reasons, to have something unique that shows I am His, something I reach for and touch when in panic or in an any upset state of emotion when He is not with me would be amazing and extremely special to me.

girl

< Message edited by goodgirl85 -- 3/16/2009 12:15:27 AM >

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RE: Collar vs wedding ring - 3/16/2009 1:53:53 AM   
beautyImurDaddy


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To me they would be equally important in different ways.  I think there are many things to be considered.  ImurDaddy and I are in the process of purchasing land, building a home, etc.  In the event anything were to happen to him, legally I would not be entitled to anything I worked so hard for because it is all in his name without us being legally married.  The courts do not recognize the fact that I have been owned by him for years.  It may have some bearing, but in the end, very little, as this same instance happened recently with 2 friends of mine whose Master's met untimely and sudden deaths leaving them homeless with very little recourse.  As far as my personal feelings with respect to the 2; Do I 'need' a wedding ring emotionally perhaps is the more appropriate question than which is more valuable.  I have many times said that I dont need a piece of paper to tell me where I belong.  I have also said that I take certain comforts in the fact that I wake up knowing every day that the person beside me is there because he wants me to be... not because I am legally obligated to be there. To me it is like having 2 children... and asking which you love more.. you love them both and are dedicated to them both... perhaps in very different ways.. but could you give up one of your children?  

I know I will probably be chastized for that analogy.. but just my feelings.  They both have their place, serve their purposes and are both equally important but in very different ways for me.

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