list of hard limits

list of hard limits (Full Version)

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lapgirl -> list of hard limits (11/23/2009 6:26:45 AM)
just curious as to some of the things people have on their list of hard limits? i am sure there are so many more "no's" for me that i may not have thought about. i want to be able to submit my list and never worry that i should have added something additional.... so, what is a hard limit for you?

silvermuse -> RE: list of hard limits (11/23/2009 6:31:04 AM)
Amongst other things, needleplay and wax play. The first is a sheer terror situation, I can't even get blood drawn without someone there all but holding me down and I panic, badly, over it. The second, I have an extreme allergic reaction to wax hitting my skin. Blisters, and it's not a temp thing, we've tried different types of wax, in tiny amounts, and the reaction is always the same. muse

NYLass -> RE: list of hard limits (11/23/2009 6:34:14 AM)
I have them listed right in my profile: My limits are set: -No loss of life or limb. Any of my body parts will remain attached without needing sutures to replace them. -No children or incest. This includes a daddydom/lilgirl, mom/son role play or any mention of relatives, or friends of said relatives-ever. -No animals. This is inclusive of bestiality or puppy/pony or any kind of pet,animal role play. -No humiliation or degradation or objectification. You can get a better reaction from asking nicely than calling me disgusting names. -No obedience training, discipline, caging, serving, kneeling or begging. These may work for animals, not me. See section referencing no animals... I don't play casually and I won't sleep around. I will not get involved with a married man or anyone involved with someone else.

Mercnbeth -> RE: list of hard limits (11/23/2009 6:34:15 AM)
quote: ...so, what is a hard limit for you?... making lists of hard limits. this slave leaves that up to the one calling the shots - Master.

MakeMeSmile4U -> RE: list of hard limits (11/23/2009 6:35:46 AM)
Hi Lapgirl, Just a suggestion: You need to think of your list of hard limits as a living thing. It will grow, change, evolve, even shrink. It's a work in progress. When I first started out my list was a mile long! Then I learned that as trust grows within a D/s relationship Hard limits become Soft limits, and Soft limits begin to dissipate. I do have a short list of non-negotiable limits which includes children, scat-play, vomit... However, my original list of hard limits included watersports and breathplay, and those are no longer on my list.... If my current relationship were to end, then my list of Hard Limits would start over again. Does that make any sense? Good luck with your list ~Smiles

DarkSteven -> RE: list of hard limits (11/23/2009 6:38:54 AM)
I'd add breathplay and fireplay to the above. And blood. You may want to consider whipping at first. Too many ways to cause injury if not done right. As you get to know others, you'll know who can do it safely.

kanina -> RE: list of hard limits (11/23/2009 6:39:29 AM)
well, no bestiality, no children.. I'm in to RACK, and i do trust my Owner of curse...

chiaThePet -> RE: list of hard limits (11/23/2009 6:48:00 AM)
Crying because Oprah is ending her show. chia* (the pet)

Lucienne -> RE: list of hard limits (11/23/2009 7:09:53 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: lapgirl i want to be able to submit my list and never worry that i should have added something additional.... I'm confused. Who are you submitting the list to and why wouldn't you be able to add to the list if you later discover some kink that should be on it?

littleone35 -> RE: list of hard limits (11/23/2009 8:53:57 AM)
My list, Blood, needle play, breath play, watersports, children, being shared with others, animals , objectification, humiliaton are no way EVER. My soft limits i expect to b pushed my hard limits are set in stone. Matt's litleone

Missokyst -> RE: list of hard limits (11/23/2009 9:00:31 AM)
I have one set hard limit. I do not play with another female. I have other limits, those which to me are no brainers.. that people may list as limits but I tend to view them as things that would never be on the table. Hmmm... I guess that means among my limits I have, choose to play only with people who are sane. Any other limit that involves physical stuff are not so much MY limits, as they are the limits I have set for people I don't know well.

HisSweetElysium -> RE: list of hard limits (11/23/2009 9:11:31 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: MakeMeSmile4U Just a suggestion: You need to think of your list of hard limits as a living thing. It will grow, change, evolve, even shrink. It's a work in progress... If my current relationship were to end, then my list of Hard Limits would start over again. ~Smiles Agreed wholeheartedly, I was just discussing this with Master this weekend. I also can't imagine a situation where I set something like that in stone, forgot something, or even changed my mind in the course of exchange and protested genuinely and had Master say "ha, too bad, you didn't say" He loves me, cares for me, and loathes genuine distress in me. If something came up that He genuinely wanted that made me that uncomfortable, we would talk about it, try it, talk about it some more, etc. until I felt ok or until He knew that I tried my best. I did tell Him at the outset of my one particular limit. I have about 30K worth of top quality tattoo art on my body. Something as minor as a cat scratch can permanently mar my beautiful art. I told Him that was off the table, damaging my artwork. As a point of negotiation on this, I agreed to finish only the work I already have, and not add any more coverage, especially my ass ;)

LPslittleclip -> RE: list of hard limits (11/23/2009 9:30:08 AM)
i did not have much on my list to start with as i had little experince. now i have 2 scat for sanitary reasons. and bull whips due to my ptsd from multiple deployments sounds like a gun shot. needles were on my list as a nurse i had a thing on needle sticks but now i enjoy needle play. when you see a activity discuss it with your partner and go from there

afterforever -> RE: list of hard limits (11/23/2009 10:23:46 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: MakeMeSmile4U Hi Lapgirl, Just a suggestion: You need to think of your list of hard limits as a living thing. It will grow, change, evolve, even shrink. It's a work in progress. When I first started out my list was a mile long! Then I learned that as trust grows within a D/s relationship Hard limits become Soft limits, and Soft limits begin to dissipate. I do have a short list of non-negotiable limits which includes children, scat-play, vomit... However, my original list of hard limits included watersports and breathplay, and those are no longer on my list.... If my current relationship were to end, then my list of Hard Limits would start over again. Does that make any sense? Good luck with your list ~Smiles This. In my past relationship, I started off saying no to watersports, breath play, blood, loads of play-related stuff. By the end I was down to scat, children, and anything that would compromise my work.

RCdc -> RE: list of hard limits (11/23/2009 10:34:27 AM)
We don't dig the whole limits list thing. My one suggestion is use common sense. I don't get the whole 'I don't do sex with kids, animals or dead people' jive. That's just common sense for crying out loud and if you get a person suggesting such - then call the bloody police, don't just say 'Oh sorry - hard limit'.[8\|] the.dark.

dragonseeker -> RE: list of hard limits (11/23/2009 10:41:48 AM)
No marks in an area where it can not be covered up by clothing. No loss of life or limb. No loss of hair on my head. (just don't do baldness very well) No scat play. No bestiality or children. No illegal activity or anything that will get me arrested. Nothing that will endanger my child, the custody of my child, or my ability to take care of my child.

agirl -> RE: list of hard limits (11/23/2009 10:56:55 AM)
I don't have a list of limits. We've never even discussed limits in regard to us. If I'd produced a list of limits he'd have chuckled and said * Think again* and to be frank, he'd never have accepted me if I came with a list of don't do's, because I wouldn't have had a compatible outlook. agirl

AnimusRex -> RE: list of hard limits (11/23/2009 11:04:22 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: agirl I don't have a list of limits. We've never even discussed limits in regard to us. If I'd produced a list of limits he'd have chuckled and said * Think again* and to be frank, he'd never have accepted me if I came with a list of don't do's, because I wouldn't have had a compatible outlook. agirl Exactly. She gave herself to me precisely because I know her well enough to be trusted with what is good for her.

agirl -> RE: list of hard limits (11/23/2009 11:26:13 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: AnimusRex quote: ORIGINAL: agirl I don't have a list of limits. We've never even discussed limits in regard to us. If I'd produced a list of limits he'd have chuckled and said * Think again* and to be frank, he'd never have accepted me if I came with a list of don't do's, because I wouldn't have had a compatible outlook. agirl Exactly. She gave herself to me precisely because I know her well enough to be trusted with what is good for her. I really wouldn't be owned by anyone for whom I'd have to stipulate what they could or couldn't do. Why on earth would I have asked him to have me if I thought for one possible moment that he would stride off down the route of causing me the most possible upset and harm. agirl

dreamerdreaming -> RE: list of hard limits (11/23/2009 1:51:36 PM)
Most of mine are listed on my profile. A couple that aren't listed there: mindfucks, and unsafe sex.

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