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How do you find someone interesting? - 11/28/2009 3:26:14 PM

ordinary

Posts: 27
Joined: 10/8/2005
Status: offline

I was a member here last year while still living in Texas, but I've recently moved to SC and haven't been able to attend any munches. I work a full time job in the evenings M-F, unfortunately, and all the munches have been during the week. I had no problem meeting interesting people in TX, but then I wasn't working either.

I keep getting a colorful array of typical emails from men that I'd rather never hear from, and I'm curious how you managed to find someone interesting on this website, how you went about contacting them or keeping conversations alive, and eventually meeting.

Post #: 1

RE: How do you find someone interesting? - 11/28/2009 3:38:07 PM

Acer49

Posts: 1434
Joined: 8/7/2009
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: ordinary

I was a member here last year while still living in Texas, but I've recently moved to SC and haven't been able to attend any munches. I work a full time job in the evenings M-F, unfortunately, and all the munches have been during the week. I had no problem meeting interesting people in TX, but then I wasn't working either.

I keep getting a colorful array of typical emails from men that I'd rather never hear from, and I'm curious how you managed to find someone interesting on this website, how you went about contacting them or keeping conversations alive, and eventually meeting.

http://www.carolinabdsm.com/calendar.php

_____________________________

Never be bullied into silence. Never allow yourself to be made a victim. Accept no one's definition of your life; define yourself.
Harvey Fierstein

(in reply to ordinary)

Post #: 2

RE: How do you find someone interesting? - 11/28/2009 4:04:03 PM

devilishpixie

Posts: 1044
Joined: 10/15/2009
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: ordinary

I was a member here last year while still living in Texas, but I've recently moved to SC and haven't been able to attend any munches. I work a full time job in the evenings M-F, unfortunately, and all the munches have been during the week. I had no problem meeting interesting people in TX, but then I wasn't working either.

I keep getting a colorful array of typical emails from men that I'd rather never hear from, and I'm curious how you managed to find someone interesting on this website, how you went about contacting them or keeping conversations alive, and eventually meeting.

Be patient and don't be afriad to approach people. After talking (exchanging a few emails) don't be afraid to ask them to meet you for coffee or lunch. It's not that different than meeting people outside the lifestyle.

(in reply to ordinary)

Post #: 3

RE: How do you find someone interesting? - 11/28/2009 4:17:51 PM

DarkSteven

Posts: 28072
Joined: 5/2/2008
Status: offline

First step, you relocate to Colorado...

_____________________________

"You women....

The small-breasted ones want larger breasts. The large-breasted ones want smaller ones. The straight-haired ones curl their hair, and the curly-haired ones straighten theirs...

Quit fretting. We men love you."

(in reply to devilishpixie)

Post #: 4

RE: How do you find someone interesting? - 11/28/2009 4:23:53 PM

lovingpet

Posts: 4270
Joined: 6/19/2005
Status: offline

If DS had his way, Colorado would have a 99.9999% fem sub population.

Let's see:
1. Patience.
2. Be interesting.
3. Patience.
4. Be willing to cast the net first.
5. Patience.
6. Did I mention patience?

lovingpet

_____________________________

If you put your head into more, you'd have to put your back into less. ~Me

10 Fluffy pts.

(in reply to DarkSteven)

Post #: 5

RE: How do you find someone interesting? - 11/28/2009 5:04:11 PM

GreedyTop

Posts: 52100
Joined: 5/2/2007
From: Savannah, GA
Status: offline

what pet said.

_____________________________

polysnortatious
Supreme Goddess of Snark
CHARTER MEMBER: Lance's Fag Hags!
Waiting for my madman in a Blue Box.

(in reply to lovingpet)

Post #: 6

RE: How do you find someone interesting? - 11/28/2009 6:06:58 PM

QuirkyAnne

Posts: 268
Joined: 9/17/2008
Status: offline

If only that were the answer to ALL of lifes problems!

Anne

(in reply to DarkSteven)

Post #: 7

RE: How do you find someone interesting? - 11/28/2009 8:58:57 PM

CaringandReal

Posts: 1397
Joined: 2/15/2008
Status: offline

A few suggestions for this website:

*set your general search parameters to all states, not just your own

*don't limit your search with things like height, weight, age

*do a text search for some activity or idea that really interests you, doesn't have to be bdsm.

* click the recent journals button on the left and try to find some that interest you

* browse photos (also on the left)

*In general, mix it up. Don't do the same old searches every day. Keep looking for profiles that are well written & sexy & that astound you will how good they are. Write those guys.

*Try not to get jaded by all the bad emails. If you get too jaded or burned, you'll stop reading certain types of emails because you think they represent a pattern. That's not always the case and you may miss out on someone good if you do that.

And yeah, the people who tend to write you are mostly not that interesting, although you can occasionally be pleasantly surprised. So you write the ones that intrigue you. Don't worry about conversation control: if you two hit it off, it'll take care of itself.

< Message edited by CaringandReal -- 11/28/2009 9:03:03 PM >

_____________________________

"A friend who bleeds is better" --placebo

"How seldom we recognize the sound when the bolt of our fate slides home." --thomas harris

(in reply to ordinary)

Post #: 8

RE: How do you find someone interesting? - 11/28/2009 9:30:42 PM

theRose4U

Posts: 3403
Joined: 8/22/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: DarkSteven

First step, you relocate to Colorado...

There are enough wierd kinksters with odd schedules here

quote:

If DS had his way, Colorado would have a 99.9999% fem sub population.

If Colorado men PERIOD had their way the population would be 99% fem subs all smoking hot (to fit the males preferences), 22-26, trust fund, can't get pregnant without permission, no teeth, mute and a strong desire towards domestic discipline. Think June Cleaver on crack with leather

< Message edited by theRose4U -- 11/28/2009 9:34:44 PM >

_____________________________

Finding a good sub is like sifting through trail mix. You find a few fruits, a lotta nuts and have to sift to get to the sweet and special ones
drama llama

(in reply to DarkSteven)

Post #: 9

RE: How do you find someone interesting? - 11/28/2009 11:44:15 PM

ThatDamnedPanda

Posts: 6060
Joined: 1/26/2009
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: theRose4U

If Colorado men PERIOD had their way the population would be 99% fem subs all smoking hot (to fit the males preferences), 22-26, trust fund, can't get pregnant without permission, no teeth, mute and a strong desire towards domestic discipline. Think June Cleaver on crack with leather

Not to mention only 3 feet tall with a flat spot on the tops of their heads.

To set a beer on, of course.

_____________________________

Panda, panda, burning bright
In the forest of the night
What immortal hand or eye
Made you all black and white and roly-poly like that?

(in reply to theRose4U)

Post #: 10

RE: How do you find someone interesting? - 11/28/2009 11:46:06 PM

ThatDamnedPanda

Posts: 6060
Joined: 1/26/2009
Status: offline

To answer the OP, there are two basic steps.

1.) Be an interesting person yourself.
2.) Meet lots of people.

That's about it.

_____________________________

Panda, panda, burning bright
In the forest of the night
What immortal hand or eye
Made you all black and white and roly-poly like that?

(in reply to ThatDamnedPanda)

Post #: 11

RE: How do you find someone interesting? - 11/29/2009 2:17:36 AM

Tinkerer

Posts: 136
Joined: 7/18/2008
Status: offline

I'm from SC, as is my mate, and we can be interesting. I sent you a PM.

(in reply to ThatDamnedPanda)

Post #: 12

RE: How do you find someone interesting? - 11/29/2009 3:04:51 AM

DarkSteven

Posts: 28072
Joined: 5/2/2008
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: theRose4U

quote:

ORIGINAL: DarkSteven

First step, you relocate to Colorado...

There are enough wierd kinksters with odd schedules here

ARE NOT!!!!

quote:

quote:

If DS had his way, Colorado would have a 99.9999% fem sub population.

If Colorado men PERIOD had their way the population would be 99% fem subs all smoking hot (to fit the males preferences), 22-26, trust fund, can't get pregnant without permission, no teeth, mute and a strong desire towards domestic discipline. Think June Cleaver on crack with leather

Rose, I'm perfectly willing to hedge a bit on the age. And you yourself seem pretty desirable - have you considered becomeing a submissive lately?

_____________________________

"You women....

The small-breasted ones want larger breasts. The large-breasted ones want smaller ones. The straight-haired ones curl their hair, and the curly-haired ones straighten theirs...

Quit fretting. We men love you."

(in reply to theRose4U)

Post #: 13

RE: How do you find someone interesting? - 11/29/2009 6:24:17 AM

ordinary

Posts: 27
Joined: 10/8/2005
Status: offline

I laughed at the description of Colorado women. It was kind of scary! Thanks for the advice.

(in reply to DarkSteven)

Post #: 14

RE: How do you find someone interesting? - 11/29/2009 7:06:11 AM

Underumam

Posts: 485
Joined: 12/18/2008
Status: offline

As with any other thing in life, meetings happen as a result of carefully planned searches, as well as the occasional "met her in the laundromat". lol. In meeting people here(and I've met some VERY good people), I tend to peruse the profiles, and look for another who has words that speak to me, then send them a quick note. Humor is one of the best things to use in composing an intro-letter, as well as a genuine desire to know more about the one I might be contacting. I guess people are people, and it's not good to think of bdsm people as something different. W/we just have other needs and other ways of expressing O/ourselves...lol.

(in reply to ordinary)

Post #: 15

RE: How do you find someone interesting? - 11/29/2009 7:33:02 AM

theRose4U

Posts: 3403
Joined: 8/22/2005
Status: offline

quote:

Rose, I'm perfectly willing to hedge a bit on the age. And you yourself seem pretty desirable - have you considered becomeing a submissive lately?

Not in this life... even for you hot stuff

_____________________________

Finding a good sub is like sifting through trail mix. You find a few fruits, a lotta nuts and have to sift to get to the sweet and special ones
drama llama

(in reply to Underumam)

Post #: 16

RE: How do you find someone interesting? - 11/29/2009 7:35:40 AM

theRose4U

Posts: 3403
Joined: 8/22/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: ThatDamnedPanda

quote:

ORIGINAL: theRose4U

If Colorado men PERIOD had their way the population would be 99% fem subs all smoking hot (to fit the males preferences), 22-26, trust fund, can't get pregnant without permission, no teeth, mute and a strong desire towards domestic discipline. Think June Cleaver on crack with leather

Not to mention only 3 feet tall with a flat spot on the tops of their heads.

To set a beer on, of course.

That would only work for a basic model,.you'd have to provide add on legs, giant hooters and teeth so they can be taken out in public...all at additional charge plus shipping and handling

_____________________________

Finding a good sub is like sifting through trail mix. You find a few fruits, a lotta nuts and have to sift to get to the sweet and special ones
drama llama

(in reply to ThatDamnedPanda)

Post #: 17

RE: How do you find someone interesting? - 11/29/2009 12:01:44 PM

Elisabella

Posts: 3939
Status: offline

I met my fiance on here a couple of years ago, I liked what he wrote on the forums and I messaged him to tell him so.

I was living in Chicago at the time, he was living in Sydney, so I never thought anything would come of it. We started talking intensely, I did All The Wrong Things (said I love you before meeting, bought a one way ticket, went to meet after a month and a half of talking, etc) and wtf that was 2 years ago and we're getting married in January.

And yeah to meet someone interesting you have to be someone interesting, more importantly you have to be compatible. And posting on the forums helps, it lets you show if someone's interesting or if they're just looking for a generic girlfriend or sex partner.

(in reply to theRose4U)

Post #: 18

RE: How do you find someone interesting? - 11/29/2009 7:35:27 PM

sunshinemiss

Posts: 17673
Joined: 11/26/2007
Status: offline

quote:

I'm curious how you managed to find someone interesting on this website,

Everyone I know looked up "sunshinemiss" and voila found someone interesting!

Seriously, you learn patience, and live an interesting life. Interesting people tend to do that and gather together.

_____________________________

Yes, I am a wonton hussy... and still sweet as 3.14

(in reply to Elisabella)

Post #: 19

RE: How do you find someone interesting? - 11/29/2009 7:49:14 PM

Underumam

Posts: 485
Joined: 12/18/2008
Status: offline

I also met a very good Domme on this site after perving her pics. lol.

(in reply to sunshinemiss)

Post #: 20

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