Why do I get a different person when I talk to a Sub online? (Full Version)

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QueenPenelope -> Why do I get a different person when I talk to a Sub online? (11/28/2009 4:16:26 PM)

Ok I have chatted with a few potential subs that I have met on collarme.com. When I read their emails I'll go over their profiles and read their loves, likes, dislikes and all that falls under their profile. But when I talk to them online they are not anything like what they say on their profile. Some don't even seem to want a real Domme but only want the fantasy of being with  one. And then when I tell them what I want and what I expect they will agree with it at frist but most of them then will change their minds and tell me they don't know what they will or wont do. I then get tempted to block men like that. Why can't they just be themsleves and not try to be anything else? That for the most part is very frustrating .






chiaThePet -> RE: Why do I get a different person when I talk to a Sub online? (11/28/2009 4:31:23 PM)


Outsourcing.

chia* (the pet)




GreedyTop -> RE: Why do I get a different person when I talk to a Sub online? (11/28/2009 4:33:56 PM)

what Chia said




lovingpet -> RE: Why do I get a different person when I talk to a Sub online? (11/28/2009 4:34:24 PM)

It's typical internet crap. Block and move on. Honestly, good people take some time and effort to find. I have said before today. It takes patience. Good luck!

lovingpet




kanina -> RE: Why do I get a different person when I talk to a Sub online? (11/28/2009 4:43:04 PM)

[:)]and sometimes when you are not looking is when they appear [:)]




MasterSlaveLA -> RE: Why do I get a different person when I talk to a Sub online? (11/28/2009 4:45:30 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: QueenPenelope

Why do I get a different person when I talk to a Sub online?



Bad aim?!! [;)]





Venatrix -> RE: Why do I get a different person when I talk to a Sub online? (11/28/2009 5:47:02 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: kanina

[:)]and sometimes when you are not looking is when they appear [:)]


Oh, ain't that the truth!




LadyPact -> RE: Why do I get a different person when I talk to a Sub online? (11/28/2009 5:50:44 PM)

I'm going to give you the same advice that I gave to you on another thread. 

Go to a munch in your area and meet real people.  You will save yourself, and probably some other folks, a lot of wasted time.

Also, you might be interested in reading some non fiction BDSM books for answers to some basic questions.

Good Luck.




subonmission -> RE: Why do I get a different person when I talk to a Sub online? (11/28/2009 6:51:58 PM)

become a lesbian, all men are liars ;)




AnimusRex -> RE: Why do I get a different person when I talk to a Sub online? (11/28/2009 7:11:31 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: subonmission
become a lesbian, all men are liars ;)


true that; even half the lesbians here are men lying.

Penelope, welcome to the online world. People on all websites are no more truthful than they are here.


Sorry.




RedMagic1 -> RE: Why do I get a different person when I talk to a Sub online? (11/28/2009 7:44:14 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: AnimusRex
People on all websites are no more truthful than they are here.

True that.  I had a conversation about 20 minutes ago with a friend.  She's got a profile up on a nilla site, and she's intelligent and attractive.  She was venting to me that she had made a date with a guy off that site, she drove to it, and he didn't show up.  She called him and he said he didn't have any excuse for not showing up, and he felt bad, so he was going to send her money.  She said, "Whatever."  He said, no really.  Then he asked her to send him some more pics.  She said no way.  He said he wouldn't send the money if she didn't send the pics.  She told him no.

I said she was lucky he didn't show up, because she learned right away she didn't need him in her life.  She said, "Well, yeah, but it still hurts."  And this is nilla dating -- earlier today!




MstrPBK -> RE: Why do I get a different person when I talk to a Sub online? (11/28/2009 7:47:59 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: subonmission: become a lesbian, all men are liars ;)


Thank you for telling ME I am a liar - when you have not even meet me in person currently or in the past.
By telling me this to me and to the CollarMe Community I can equally and fairly call you a liar too.

subonmission I suggest you think about what you say in the future about people you have never met.

MstrPBK
St. Paul, MN USA




aphotic -> RE: Why do I get a different person when I talk to a Sub online? (11/28/2009 7:54:35 PM)

Penelope, a lot of your posts are complaining about the way the CM is setup. It's open to everyone -- men/women with fantasies, and those who want to fulfill them. The answers aren't going to change from topic to topic. If you want to go to a munch, you might meet someone with more social skills and realistic. If you choose to look online, then you'll have to dig a bit more for the diamond. It's just the nature of the beast.

Yes, you can find someone online possibly. Sure, you could meet someone at a munch. Either way, people will lie at times. Just take a breath, and keep at it.




LadyHibiscus -> RE: Why do I get a different person when I talk to a Sub online? (11/28/2009 8:10:38 PM)

Learn to stop a conversation gracefully, in a way that feels comfortable to you. Learn to not take it personally when Mr X decides to call you a "{insert insult}". Chatting is fun, I have phases where I do it for hours, but mainly, the REAL WORLD is where we meet people. Making realtime friends, and learning from a network of people, is the best way to go. I will not tell you that the real world doesn't have its share of time wasters, losers, creeps, and folks that are just not a match for YOU, but it's much more fulfilling in the long run.





Venatrix -> RE: Why do I get a different person when I talk to a Sub online? (11/28/2009 8:22:32 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: aphotic

Penelope, a lot of your posts are complaining about the way the CM is setup.


In addition, the OP has been on CM for all of five days.  It took me over a year before I became that jaded.  My tuppence is that the OP is trying too hard to meet someone.  My happiest result, which continues at this time, was when I stopped looking for a relationship and started looking for friends.  One of the latter became the former.




rockspider -> RE: Why do I get a different person when I talk to a Sub online? (11/29/2009 12:28:09 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: subonmission

become a lesbian, all men are liars ;)

Hi. You shouldn't be the sister to my old friend Tommy. I remember him shakin his head in disbelief and saying "Woman!!! In my next life i want to be born a homo"
I wonder what happened to that old grazy guy. But he was fun[:)]
Well some years back i was on a holiday in Phillipines. I often used internet cafees there and in all off them sat a number of girls with screens full of IM's Some must have had 20 of them going at the same time. Probably they where declaring their undying love to all of them. I really had an amusing experience when i did lure on of their nicks and contacted her literally from the chair behind her[:D] She swore she was speaking to nobody but me. Well the fun came when she turned her webcam on and after some talking i pointed out the guy behind her[:D]




lobodomslavery -> RE: Why do I get a different person when I talk to a Sub online? (11/29/2009 1:05:40 AM)

The Internet is role play for most men. Sad but true. Get out to the munches. Meet men for real
Kevin




DesFIP -> RE: Why do I get a different person when I talk to a Sub online? (11/29/2009 11:55:28 AM)

People who have no experience may enjoy the idea of something but cannot tell you what they will enjoy in real life since they've never had the opportunity to find out.

Beyond that, there are things I will do with him now that I wouldn't have done in the beginning nor would I do with anyone else. He's earned my trust so I can try stuff with him that otherwise I wouldn't feel comfortable doing. So do I list something I may eventually do when the time and relationship are right as things I do or things I don't do?

Why don't you ask them why their lists are different from what they say to you, a person with very limited skills/experience who they neither know nor trust. These are people, not blow up dolls.




Acer49 -> RE: Why do I get a different person when I talk to a Sub online? (11/29/2009 12:19:59 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: QueenPenelope

Ok I have chatted with a few potential subs that I have met on collarme.com. When I read their emails I'll go over their profiles and read their loves, likes, dislikes and all that falls under their profile. But when I talk to them online they are not anything like what they say on their profile. Some don't even seem to want a real Domme but only want the fantasy of being with  one. And then when I tell them what I want and what I expect they will agree with it at frist but most of them then will change their minds and tell me they don't know what they will or wont do. I then get tempted to block men like that. Why can't they just be themsleves and not try to be anything else? That for the most part is very frustrating .




I have no doubt that many of your preconceived ideas about the lifestyle and the people in it will sadly, be shreadded in a short amount of time. For the people here are no better or no worse an any other segment of society and the sooner you come to terms with that, the better it will be for you. i truly wish it were not the case, but it is. this is way life is and people are.

To the person who thinks that "ALL" men are liars and advocates becomming a lesbian. News flash, Lesbians do lie, no more or less than anyone one else and since you and I have never met, your statement presents facts not in evidence. While I hope your statement was supposed to illict some sort of a humorous interpetation, it didn't




sirsholly -> RE: Why do I get a different person when I talk to a Sub online? (11/29/2009 12:33:22 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: subonmission
all men are liars ;)


if thats true it explains why i can't parallel park to save my ass. I was always told this>>> --------------- is eight inches.



I should have fought that ticket i got for parking too close to a fire hydrant. If i had a female judge there would have been nooooooo problem.




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