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funny stories - 9/3/2004 5:57:09 AM   
ShrewWhisperer


Posts: 63
Joined: 8/26/2004
Status: offline 		After all the serious stuff on the board today I got in the mood to hear some funny B&D stories, com'n share with the rest of the class the time the wax melted at the wrong time and you had to explain a 2nd degree burn on your clilt...com'n share the time you were putting her in the stocks and accidently got your watch caught in her hair on the wrong side of the contraption and spent 6 hours climbing over the thing while the dog ate all the deliocous 9&1/2 weeks treats you brought.

one of the more interesting ones of my own:

I had been invited to a foursome in Oregon...the other guy passed out from the sourest wine I've ever had about 20 minutes into it....so being a red blooded american boy I took up the slack I was doing a obdience/angrandizement ceremony with both of the girls, things were going well...then sorta degenerated into things which were pretty vanilla.

I was mounted on one girl, the other dissappeared behind me, rub, rub, etc etc..then she began an incredible analingus (this was '82, before it was a fad with straight men) got to climax fell on the bed, the girl who was under me started laughing like she had seen wally cox naked, the family dog was on the end of the bed just beaming with pride....

always figgered I shoulda married that dog.
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RE: funny stories - 9/3/2004 6:55:57 AM   
knees2you


Posts: 2336
Joined: 3/15/2004
Status: offline 		Should be under humor~~

But nice story~~

Sincerely, eyesofAslave




Attachment (1)

(in reply to ShrewWhisperer)
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RE: funny stories - 9/3/2004 7:28:55 AM   
ShrewWhisperer


Posts: 63
Joined: 8/26/2004
Status: offline 		perhaps it shoulda been under humor...though you need to tell me, where does anal-rententive go?

(in reply to knees2you)
Profile   Post #: 3
RE: funny stories - 9/3/2004 9:30:05 AM   
ScorpioMaster


Posts: 146
Joined: 3/30/2004
Status: offline 		I was at a fetish ball event when I notice these two old young ladies had place this young gentleman dressed like Tom Cruise in Risky Business. They had place on him these cheap wrist and ankle shackles with a chained attached between. The wrist cuffs used regular police issue handcuff keys while the ankle uses the cheap fat key kind. The place was dark and it was hard for the to see where to unlock the cuffs and leg iron. It seems it took them about 45 minutes trying to get him out of them. I walked over asked if I could assist and was able to get them off him in 15 seconds. I then handed the keys back to these young ladies and I said please let a professional use these type of restraints. It was the most fun I had ever had at an event.

(in reply to ShrewWhisperer)
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RE: funny stories - 9/3/2004 10:05:15 AM   
squirrelfury


Posts: 44
Joined: 8/20/2004
From: Houston, Texas
Status: offline 		This only vaugely falls under the category of a funny BDSM story, as the bondage in it was secondhand to the event. That said, read on...

I was living in South Carolina back in '99, right before I joined the Air Force. My then mistress from Buffalo, NY came down to visit me for a few days. We did the initial first offline meeting thing, getting to know each other, et al. A few days into it, she and I decided to have a pair of my friends over to just hang out and relax. Eventually, we all worked our way to the bedroom, where I was subsequently tied to my bed by her, while our guest couple were happily involving themselves with each other on the floor. Pleasant tease and denial foreplay ensued on my and my top's part, and sooner or later the lights went out. Now, my mistress had brought her toys down with her for the trip, and the couple found them and asked her blessing to use 'em. It was given, and things continued merrily on their way. About thirty minutes after the lights were down, she and I hear this sudden giggled shriek right next to us from the floor, followed by these words:

"That does sooooo not go in my ear!"

We just broke out laughing, without even the restraint to stop long enough to turn on the light to see what spurred this outburst. Finally, having collected ourselves and overcome by curiosity, we (meaning she, as I was still bound at this point) turned on the light, and found our couple on the floor, with her on bottom, and him on top, both naked, and him holding a laaaaarge silicone dildo up against her ear.

Speechless, we both just stared at the two for a moment, and then lost it again to a fit of laughter that I swear before all things holy lasted half an hour.

_____________________________

~Squirrel~
I wept for I had no shoes, then I met the bastard who took them. Who's crying *now*, fetish-boy?

From a word to a word I was led to a word, from a deed to another deed.

(in reply to ScorpioMaster)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: funny stories - 9/3/2004 10:52:19 AM   
proudsub


Posts: 6142
Joined: 1/31/2004
From: Washington
Status: offline 		There are some good stories here too:


most embarassing moments

_____________________________

proudsub

"Without goals you become what you were. With goals you become what you wish." .

"You are entitled to your own opinions but not your own facts"--Alan Greenspan


(in reply to ShrewWhisperer)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: funny stories - 9/3/2004 4:25:12 PM   
MistressDREAD


Posts: 2943
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline 		I hate to say it but this story will probabaly be pulled for the small beastiality slant to your story. It was a very good one by the way
and a very sneekie way to get around the rules I might add. I enjoyed
your humor and after having to write a poem about killed children a small uplift. Sorry to be the bringer of bad tidings tho..........

(in reply to proudsub)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: funny stories - 9/3/2004 11:03:59 PM   
ShrewWhisperer


Posts: 63
Joined: 8/26/2004
Status: offline 		Thank you Mistress D, it's a shame our AC/DC parts don't mesh, cuz you're just cool

I didn't know that beastiality was a no-no topic on the board I gotta start reading the posted rules sometime...but then again rules are something that happen to other people, I believe in courtsey: if a land needs more rules than that and it is followed by the populace there is something wrong in denmark..oh wait lots of rules in denmark...well not so much rules, more like priceing structure

(in reply to MistressDREAD)
Profile   Post #: 8
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