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CRUEL TO BE KIND - 3/14/2006 9:43:18 PM   
jessykapower


Posts: 74
Joined: 2/8/2006
Status: offline 		I know that many of you just like to get the crap beaten out of you. Well if you are having fun, why not. But it it really fun?

I cannot be kind to a slave that just wants me to torture him, he would take me for a fool and run to another more sadistic domme.

But even if I am not suppose to say this because it will probably destroy my reputation as a DOMINATRIX. But I really just want to hold you all in my arms and make your pain go away. Well, call me soft, call me what you wish. I just call myself the:

LOVE GODDESS

JESSYKA.
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: CRUEL TO BE KIND - 3/14/2006 10:34:31 PM   
DragonNphoenix


Posts: 617
Joined: 8/2/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: jessykapower

I know that many of you just like to get the crap beaten out of you. Well if you are having fun, why not. But it it really fun?

I cannot be kind to a slave that just wants me to torture him, he would take me for a fool and run to another more sadistic domme.

But even if I am not suppose to say this because it will probably destroy my reputation as a DOMINATRIX. But I really just want to hold you all in my arms and make your pain go away. Well, call me soft, call me what you wish. I just call myself the:

LOVE GODDESS

JESSYKA.



There is a place for comfort and tenderness in a Master/slave relationship. I know this... my Master is very loving and tender, even though he does punish me when I need it.

1st Girl Phoenix


_____________________________

**Pain is just pleasure with a twist**

(in reply to jessykapower)
Profile   Post #: 2
RE: CRUEL TO BE KIND - 3/14/2006 10:48:25 PM   
amayos


Posts: 1553
Joined: 6/2/2004
From: New England
Status: offline 		I will often hold a slave in my arms and coo in her ear . . . after I've caned her to a state of abject weeping, of course. Does that count?


(in reply to jessykapower)
Profile   Post #: 3
RE: CRUEL TO BE KIND - 3/15/2006 2:06:15 AM   
xxblushesxx


Posts: 9318
Joined: 11/3/2005
From: Kentucky
Status: offline 		it does to me!


(in reply to amayos)
Profile   Post #: 4
RE: CRUEL TO BE KIND - 3/15/2006 2:16:49 AM   
slavejali


Posts: 2918
Status: offline
quote:

Slaves read this carefully before you contact me:

This is not a vanilla dating site. If you are looking for love or for a date than know that you are on the wrong website. This is a BDSM site and on this site you find Mistresses that are into Domination. Some are PRO, witch means they do this for a living and some are only looking for pets they can torture or abuse.

This is what I don't want:
I don't want a lover
I don't want a Master
I don't want a husband
I don't want sex
I don't want to chat
I don't care what your fantasies are

This is what I want:
I want slaves that can improve my life
I want them male or female
I want loyal servants
I want devoted subs
I want people who can place my needs in front of theirs.

IS THAT CLEAR ENOUGH ???


I'm confused.

< Message edited by slavejali -- 3/15/2006 2:23:56 AM >

(in reply to xxblushesxx)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: CRUEL TO BE KIND - 3/15/2006 2:57:07 AM   
BeachMystress


Posts: 2156
Joined: 4/3/2004
From: Naples Island- Long Beach CA - Southern California
Status: offline
Why would it ruin your reputation as a Dominatrix? I think you're making the mistake of confusing Dominant and bitch. You do not have to be mean, cruel or give pain to be a Dominant Woman. The whole point of being Dominant is that you get to do what YOU enjoy and want. If you want to cuddle and coddle, then do it. Do not compromise what you want because most of the popular BDSM lore holds that a Domme needs to smack the sub around. Some men may tell you that you're not a "real" Domme because of this, but I'm sorry.. how does doing what YOU want make you unDominant? *sigh* Don't live their lie. Be yourself and enjoy your Dominance the way you want it.

_____________________________

Beach Mystress
*Do not threaten the weak. Intimidate the strong. ~ Stevenson*
http://beachmystress.jigsy.com
http://www.flickr.com/photos/beachmystress/

(in reply to jessykapower)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: CRUEL TO BE KIND - 3/15/2006 3:16:20 AM   
Level


Posts: 25145
Joined: 3/3/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: BeachMystress


Why would it ruin your reputation as a Dominatrix? I think you're making the mistake of confusing Dominant and bitch. You do not have to be mean, cruel or give pain to be a Dominant Woman. The whole point of being Dominant is that you get to do what YOU enjoy and want. If you want to cuddle and coddle, then do it. Do not compromise what you want because most of the popular BDSM lore holds that a Domme needs to smack the sub around. Some men may tell you that you're not a "real" Domme because of this, but I'm sorry.. how does doing what YOU want make you unDominant? *sigh* Don't live their lie. Be yourself and enjoy your Dominance the way you want it.


A-FREAKING-MEN lol.........if a dominant has a foot fetish, and likes to kiss feet, there are some that would say "oh no, that's no dominant there"..............well, bullshit.

Level who is indeed talking about himself lol

(in reply to BeachMystress)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: CRUEL TO BE KIND - 3/15/2006 4:32:13 AM   
RavenMuse


Posts: 4030
Joined: 1/23/2006
Status: offline 		Oh lil' miss Jessy is back again and again it isn't so much a post as a personal add!

Go buy a clue sweetie, find someone to teach you some actual social skills and then come back and try again, you might actualy get somewhere!

_____________________________

This above all: to thine own self be true,
And it must follow, as the night the day,
Thou canst not then be false to any man.

Owner of metalmiss

(in reply to jessykapower)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: CRUEL TO BE KIND - 3/15/2006 4:41:18 AM   
LadyJulieAnn


Posts: 979
Joined: 6/29/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: jessykapower

I know that many of you just like to get the crap beaten out of you. Well if you are having fun, why not. But it it really fun?

I cannot be kind to a slave that just wants me to torture him, he would take me for a fool and run to another more sadistic domme.

But even if I am not suppose to say this because it will probably destroy my reputation as a DOMINATRIX. But I really just want to hold you all in my arms and make your pain go away. Well, call me soft, call me what you wish. I just call myself the:

LOVE GODDESS

JESSYKA.


That's called giving aftercare, and it's very important.

Be well,
Julie

(in reply to jessykapower)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: CRUEL TO BE KIND - 3/15/2006 5:01:39 AM   
IrishMist


Posts: 7480
Joined: 11/17/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: slavejali

quote:

Slaves read this carefully before you contact me:

This is not a vanilla dating site. If you are looking for love or for a date than know that you are on the wrong website. This is a BDSM site and on this site you find Mistresses that are into Domination. Some are PRO, witch means they do this for a living and some are only looking for pets they can torture or abuse.

This is what I don't want:
I don't want a lover
I don't want a Master
I don't want a husband
I don't want sex
I don't want to chat
I don't care what your fantasies are

This is what I want:
I want slaves that can improve my life
I want them male or female
I want loyal servants
I want devoted subs
I want people who can place my needs in front of theirs.

IS THAT CLEAR ENOUGH ???


I'm confused.


/nods in agreement

So am I.


_____________________________

If I said something to offend you, please tell me what it was so that I can say it again later.


(in reply to slavejali)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: CRUEL TO BE KIND - 3/15/2006 5:13:25 AM   
fastlane


Posts: 2159
Joined: 5/26/2005
Status: offline 		A Masochists scrathes his/her head in total confusion........Love, lord above, now she's trying to trick me in love? Alright now...baby it's a alright now!

alright, I'm game as he/she too plays the hand dealt and cuddles in Jessie's loving arms for a minute and then whispers softly.....now, can we get back to the caning for God's sake?

_____________________________

Just because it hurts, doesn't necessarily make it a bad thing.

(in reply to IrishMist)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: CRUEL TO BE KIND - 3/15/2006 5:13:46 AM   
JohnWarren


Posts: 3807
Joined: 3/18/2005
From: Delray Beach, FL
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: jessykapower

I know that many of you just like to get the crap beaten out of you. Well if you are having fun, why not. But it it really fun?

I cannot be kind to a slave that just wants me to torture him, he would take me for a fool and run to another more sadistic domme.

But even if I am not suppose to say this because it will probably destroy my reputation as a DOMINATRIX. But I really just want to hold you all in my arms and make your pain go away. Well, call me soft, call me what you wish. I just call myself the:

LOVE GODDESS

JESSYKA.


But if your needs (cuddling) and his (to be beaten) are so out of sync, would it really be a bad thing if he ran off?

I've known a number of submissives whose scenes weren't even tangental to my own. Occasionally, I've played with them and one or the other of us comes away disappointed.

I've found it's very important to have complementary kinks and the scene is too wide and diverse to expect that to happen even if there is an intense physical and emotional attachment.

If you really like someone and his or her scene is incompatable, be friends, not play partners.

I too like to "cuddle and make the pain go away." The difference is I like to cause the pain in the first place.

_____________________________

www.lovingdominant.org

(in reply to jessykapower)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: CRUEL TO BE KIND - 3/15/2006 5:49:30 AM   
MistressOfGa


Posts: 2929
Status: offline 		There has never been a time when I have punished my pup that I did not go to him later and hold him. There has never been a session where I did not hold him tenderly while at times he wept. Do you think that beating and torturing is all there is to being a Domina? I feel sorry for you if you do, because, truly you are missing out on some of the best parts. I dont know of one human being who would/could just take the beatings and not want or have his/her emotional side taken care of as well. If they are out there, I have yet to meet them.

_____________________________





(in reply to jessykapower)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: CRUEL TO BE KIND - 3/15/2006 6:22:27 AM   
RiotGirl


Posts: 3149
Status: offline 		Yeah.. Master can wear the living tar of me.. but he ALWAYS ends it with softness

(in reply to MistressOfGa)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: CRUEL TO BE KIND - 3/15/2006 7:31:38 AM   
DiannaVesta


Posts: 1087
Joined: 2/6/2006
From: Mid-Atlantic area
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: RavenMuse

Oh lil' miss Jessy is back again and again it isn't so much a post as a personal add!

Go buy a clue sweetie, find someone to teach you some actual social skills and then come back and try again, you might actualy get somewhere!


I thought that was rude and uncalled for, really. Regardless of her hidden agenda I think it’s a great topic although discussed over and again on this site. So Raven flame me for my opinion. I felt you jumped the gun on this one but please lets not ruin a great topic over it. PM me if you like.

There are so many dynamics within BDSM; cruel, sadistic, dominant, submissive – good-bad, light-dark- it’s a polarity so to speak where any extreme to one end isn’t going to produce a good result. I don’t want to sound complicated and I know I will without lengthy discussion I don’t have time for today.

I believe that you can dance in darkness as long as you do so constructively. If you selfishly take with no regard then you will never know or understand the great beauty in balance. When I see a slave trembling at my feet and I know that I can hurt him/her and do as I will, I also need to know that it will constructively produce a result that is positive for both of us. Otherwise there is no dynamic and no relationship. How can I get off on this?

I don’t think that any slave/submissive or masochist hops up and says, “beat the shit out of me.” Ok, maybe I’m wrong but in my experience it’s a game of cat & mouse where intrigue and passion entangle. I am projective and they are receptive, which is what John is saying, pretty much. If it’s not in sync it’s not a dynamic. It’s nothing.

Ms LOVE Goddess, I don’t think you understand exactly what I’m talking about because if you did you would realize this too as the ultimate form of love.(IMO). Cruelty can be so tender and so raw in passion. Not just physical but the emotional taunting and teasing that stimulates the core. If you knew how hot a subs blood boils & longs to surface then you might change your tune on that. It is skill and artful.

THEN when the deed is done cuddling and loving whispers seal the deal.

Dianna Vesta

< Message edited by DiannaVesta -- 3/15/2006 7:34:41 AM >

_____________________________



(in reply to RavenMuse)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: CRUEL TO BE KIND - 3/15/2006 8:28:35 AM   
LuckyAlbatross


Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline 		The truth is that lots of subs will feel there is something lacking in the dominance of the other if they aren't harsh at least sometimes, if they aren't cruel at least sometimes and if they aren't regularly behaving in a stereotypical taskmaster position (we have a thread on that right now).

Those subs obviously aren't compatible with you. And the reality is that being a good and effective dominant has nothing to do with being cruel or evil or barking orders, unless it's what happens to work for the individual. My local partner actually worries about that occasionally- that he isn't a harsh sadist and prefers to say please and thank you rather than just snap his fingers. Silly but true.

_____________________________

Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

(in reply to jessykapower)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: CRUEL TO BE KIND - 3/15/2006 10:13:54 AM   
luckyslaveboync


Posts: 69
Joined: 3/18/2005
Status: offline 		lucky agrees with the previous comment by LuckyAlbatross, whose name illustrates what lucky wants to emphasize: how nice contrasts are. As a sub, lucky much prefers alternative the loving/romantic with the dominating/harsh, though the latter might be humiliation in addition to punishment. It is the contrasts, lucky thinks, that intensify experiences and are central to what many subs seek: a more vivid life.

(in reply to LuckyAlbatross)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: CRUEL TO BE KIND - 3/15/2006 10:30:28 AM   
RavenMuse


Posts: 4030
Joined: 1/23/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: DiannaVesta
I thought that was rude and uncalled for, really. Regardless of her hidden agenda I think it’s a great topic although discussed over and again on this site. So Raven flame me for my opinion. I felt you jumped the gun on this one but please lets not ruin a great topic over it. PM me if you like.


I have no need to PM you petal.
1) I don't much care what you thought of what I posted
2) I stand by what I said, yet again she posted a personal ad rather than a forum post
3) The fact that others have managed to turn it into something doesn't change what the orgional 'Ad' was
4) That is the last I have to say on it and as you say, lets leave this to go the way the rest of the thread contributors have SALVAGED out of a bad initial post!

< Message edited by RavenMuse -- 3/15/2006 10:31:13 AM >

_____________________________

This above all: to thine own self be true,
And it must follow, as the night the day,
Thou canst not then be false to any man.

Owner of metalmiss

(in reply to DiannaVesta)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: CRUEL TO BE KIND - 3/15/2006 10:32:43 AM   
truesub4u


Posts: 2949
Joined: 11/17/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: IrishMist


quote:

ORIGINAL: slavejali

quote:

Slaves read this carefully before you contact me:

This is not a vanilla dating site. If you are looking for love or for a date than know that you are on the wrong website. This is a BDSM site and on this site you find Mistresses that are into Domination. Some are PRO, witch means they do this for a living and some are only looking for pets they can torture or abuse.

This is what I don't want:
I don't want a lover
I don't want a Master
I don't want a husband
I don't want sex
I don't want to chat
I don't care what your fantasies are

This is what I want:
I want slaves that can improve my life
I want them male or female
I want loyal servants
I want devoted subs
I want people who can place my needs in front of theirs.

IS THAT CLEAR ENOUGH ???


I'm confused.


/nods in agreement

So am I.



Jumps in this line of confusion

_____________________________

Wisdom is knowing what to do next, Skill is knowing how to do it, and Virtue is doing it.

(in reply to IrishMist)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: CRUEL TO BE KIND - 3/15/2006 10:55:46 AM   
BitaTruble


Posts: 9779
Joined: 1/12/2006
From: Texas
Status: offline
quote:

I too like to "cuddle and make the pain go away." The difference is I like to cause the pain in the first place.


And people like me have a great deal of appreciation for people like you. :)

Celeste

_____________________________

"Oh, so it's just like
Rock, paper, scissors."

He laughed. "You are the wisest woman I know."


(in reply to JohnWarren)
Profile   Post #: 20
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