So unsublike, I have to post it here --"under consideration??"

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So unsublike, I have to post it here --"under cons... - 12/4/2009 2:16:19 PM

HisSweetElysium

Posts: 600
Joined: 11/12/2009
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Okay I see this term used often here, and I am wondering what exactly this means. Is this just verbiage, or is this realistically how folks view their search for partners?

I'm a sub, now a slave. Before I found Him, I kissed more than a few frogs. But honestly, during that time the "under consideration" bit was mutual, more often than not, leaned heavily towards me considering the Dom. Never once was I sitting back saying "oh goodness, I hope He wants me." Most of the time I was taking things slow, trying to get to know the person, to see if I wanted to pursue even meeting them, let alone submitting to them. I guess I fall into that camp of "gift of submission" because it took a very special man to collar me and I knew I deserved it.

Maybe I did something wrong? LOL. It worked out pretty darned well for me, so I'm thinking not.

_____________________________

“This is love: to fly toward a secret sky, to cause a hundred veils to fall each moment. First to let go of life. Finally, to take a step without feet.” Rumi

Post #: 1

RE: So unsublike, I have to post it here --"under ... - 12/4/2009 2:25:21 PM

DesFIP

Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
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I view under consideration as a way to tell other guys that right this minute you're focusing on someone else, and they shouldn't write you today, but feel free to check back in a few weeks to see if you're looking again. Just useful as a mail filter.

I hope we all are picky enough to wait for a partner who will be a good fit and we can be happy with, instead of desperate enough to force our square selves into a round hole where we will be lonely with someone as opposed to alone without someone.

_____________________________

Slave to laundry

Cynical and proud of it!

(in reply to HisSweetElysium)

Post #: 2

RE: So unsublike, I have to post it here --"under ... - 12/4/2009 2:28:15 PM

HisSweetElysium

Posts: 600
Joined: 11/12/2009
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see now THAT actually makes a great deal of sense, thank you for explaining it to me. There's another thread going where someone was discussing themselves as "under consideration" and it really rubbed me the wrong way for some reason. Much appreciated!

_____________________________

“This is love: to fly toward a secret sky, to cause a hundred veils to fall each moment. First to let go of life. Finally, to take a step without feet.” Rumi

(in reply to DesFIP)

Post #: 3

RE: So unsublike, I have to post it here --"under ... - 12/4/2009 2:31:49 PM

GYPSYMAMBO

Posts: 660
Joined: 9/26/2009
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quote:

ORIGINAL: DesFIP

I view under consideration as a way to tell other guys that right this minute you're focusing on someone else, and they shouldn't write you today, but feel free to check back in a few weeks to see if you're looking again. Just useful as a mail filter.

I feel the same and also
it is about ethics to me..

It lets others know that if you do strike up a good commmunication there is still someone ELSE in the "mix" as well..

I would hate to be an excited and eager sub talking for weeks in anticipation and hope only to hear..
"Oh well I had someone else who I was talking to first and it worked out..see ya..""

GM

< Message edited by GYPSYMAMBO -- 12/4/2009 2:32:30 PM >

_____________________________

"Better served women will better serve the world"

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"A turd is still a turd even if it is shellaced!"

(in reply to DesFIP)

Post #: 4

RE: So unsublike, I have to post it here --"under ... - 12/4/2009 2:34:16 PM

CallaFirestormBW

Posts: 3651
Joined: 6/29/2008
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We do use the term "under consideration", as a notation for those servants whom we are actively considering including in our household. For us, the process is an extended one, and, as I've mentioned in a few other posts, it is not a romantic or sexual evaluation process, but a compatibility and skill-set evaluation. Our Keepers also go through the "under consideration" process, as do those who are neutral, practicing neither fetish nor authority exchange, but still full members of the household.

We also place "consideration" collars for our servants who are in this position with our household, and we do so for specific purpose. Because our household is spread around a bit, we have visitors and friends who may not know whether someone they don't recognize is a newcomer (and should be cut some slack if xhe doesn't get our rituals and protocols spot-on first time), or whether xhe's familiar with the structure and function of the household. A consideration collar (in our case, it is actually consideration -tags- attached to the d-ring or chain of a collar) makes it clear that this person isn't yet a full member of the household, and is not expected to abide by the requirements we have for our other servants -- it also lets those who might be discussing house business know that there is someone in the room who is not bound by any pledges to our family, and to be able to make any decisions regarding discretion accordingly.

For us, it is not a luxury nor a "joke", and has nothing to do with restricting a servant without cause until we can "get around" to hir. Those under consideration are welcome to come and go as they choose, and, while we ask that they focus on our household during the time that they are actively being considered and considering us, they are welcome to terminate that consideration state at will, as are we, so no-one is bound to the relationship or hanging in limbo indefinitely.

Dame Calla

_____________________________

***
Said to me recently: "Look, I know you're the "voice of reason"... but dammit, I LIKE being unreasonable!!!!"

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(in reply to HisSweetElysium)

Post #: 5

RE: So unsublike, I have to post it here --"under ... - 12/4/2009 2:35:46 PM

DesFIP

Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
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New pic GM? I like it.
Personally I only dated one at a time. Got too confusing otherwise. But I know other people feel free to date multiple people at once with no assumption of even temporary exclusivity.

Myself, I think this is a conversation that should be had early on. "You talking to/seeing anyone else now? Three or four, why? Just wanted to get the lines drawn."

_____________________________

Slave to laundry

Cynical and proud of it!

(in reply to GYPSYMAMBO)

Post #: 6

RE: So unsublike, I have to post it here --"under ... - 12/4/2009 2:39:10 PM

Underumam

Posts: 485
Joined: 12/18/2008
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I was under consideration with someone here for two weeks, and I was the one that ended it. I'm glad that there is a commonly accepted form of an introduction period among us. Being under consideration meant "Ok, it's time to start thinking seriously, and allow another to start seeing the real me, with no holds barred." Not that most of us don't try to portray ourselves honestly at all times, but exchanging phone numbers and beginning an accountability period reveals a whole lot of things that don't usually get revealed in the generic form. I guess it's very similar to a vanilla dating period in that we have the opportunity to see if W/we are compatible enough to reach an intimate level of comfortability together. Being Under Consideration is very good indeed.

(in reply to HisSweetElysium)

Post #: 7

RE: So unsublike, I have to post it here --"under ... - 12/4/2009 2:44:15 PM

GYPSYMAMBO

Posts: 660
Joined: 9/26/2009
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quote:

ORIGINAL: DesFIP

New pic GM? I like it.
Personally I only dated one at a time.

yes new pic..I let the Kongo kink from great grandma come out in my hair..

Re: dating...
I was talking about TALKING..maybe a coffee meeting or 3...
to CONSIDER by comparing commonlities...desires, styles...
so at times I had 3 "under consideration..."
my version of it I guess..but CLEAR to those I was interacting with.

GM

_____________________________

"Better served women will better serve the world"

** ** **

"A turd is still a turd even if it is shellaced!"

(in reply to DesFIP)

Post #: 8

RE: So unsublike, I have to post it here --"under ... - 12/4/2009 2:48:44 PM

CaringandReal

Posts: 1397
Joined: 2/15/2008
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I would never personally use the term... well, that is, unless ordered to by someone interested in humiliating me. :/ I don't like it, it's too scene-ish for my tastes. It makes me feel phony, like I am putting on an act or am unusually vain or affected. Just personal assoications with the phrase, I guess. (shrug) I can just as easily write, "Not Looking at the moment." As someone said in another thread, the sensible ones will read something like this and leave you alone, the dumbos will be their usual dumb selves and write anyway, no matter what you put up.

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"A friend who bleeds is better" --placebo

"How seldom we recognize the sound when the bolt of our fate slides home." --thomas harris

(in reply to Underumam)

Post #: 9

RE: So unsublike, I have to post it here --"under ... - 12/4/2009 2:55:13 PM

Aynne88

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Joined: 8/29/2008
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No way in hell would I ever be deemed "under consideration". I am not a new car, or a job offer. How much can I get you to show me on your web cam and how much fucking phone sex can I get is what that term says to me. I am sure for some it is probably a bit more authentic than that, but when I was new and naive I heard that term dangled in front of me like a carrot by way to many "Doms." Yeah...no.

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As long as people will shed the blood of innocent creatures there can be no peace, no liberty, no harmony between people. Slaughter and justice cannot dwell together.
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(in reply to CaringandReal)

Post #: 10

RE: So unsublike, I have to post it here --"under ... - 12/4/2009 2:59:56 PM

persephonee

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Joined: 12/15/2007
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i was under consideration once, and totally missed the conversation where i was *informed* of the fact. When i was single, i saw, played with, talked to as many people as i chose to. i never kept it a secret that i was doing any of those things from anyone. It didnt seem to deter anyone from advancing.

ive seen Dominants list people they have "under consideration" which i think is nice to know that they are a tad bit more serious about girlX than they are me at that particular time....*shrugs*

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You be the Captain; i'll be no one.

And You can carry me away....if You want to. ~Kasey Chambers

E*Whore, extraordinaire....

Nothing is exactly as it seems~Nor, is it otherwise.

(in reply to CaringandReal)

Post #: 11

RE: So unsublike, I have to post it here --"under ... - 12/4/2009 3:03:08 PM

wisdomtogive

Posts: 636
Joined: 11/13/2009
Status: offline

I have used the word under consideration for a reason..it simply means another and i are considering making this into a commitment. I can not focus on more then one person at a time. The one i was under consideration I ended, for reasons that were important to me.

Now i again have it in my profile, for another one, yet not for the same reason. Someone I have known for over 2 and half years and we have always been very close friends, plus he is a client of mine. He is coming to my state in Jan. If the chemistry is there then a commitment will be made. Though i don't care for the word, it is useable and serves a function. It is up to people to accept that or not. It does curtail a lot of cmails of 'interested in being friends', which pleases me. Those it don't get deleted.i

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Happily owned by MstrDark1

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Post #: 12

RE: So unsublike, I have to post it here --"under ... - 12/4/2009 3:03:29 PM

Mercnbeth

Posts: 11766
Status: offline

after we were in each other's physical presence for a couple of hours, there were a few nearby hotels seriously under consideration.

other than that, we had/have no use for the term. for those that do---more power to them.

(in reply to HisSweetElysium)

Post #: 13

RE: So unsublike, I have to post it here --"under ... - 12/4/2009 3:06:41 PM

persephonee

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Joined: 12/15/2007
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beth....im *shocked*...

_____________________________

You be the Captain; i'll be no one.

And You can carry me away....if You want to. ~Kasey Chambers

E*Whore, extraordinaire....

Nothing is exactly as it seems~Nor, is it otherwise.

(in reply to Mercnbeth)

Post #: 14

RE: So unsublike, I have to post it here --"under ... - 12/4/2009 3:12:56 PM

Llyren

Posts: 637
Joined: 3/5/2007
From: Illinois
Status: offline

I love that, Mercnbeth. That was very, very funny, and oh so accurate in how I think I'll feel if I meet some people in person..

I've seen under consideration, and it seems like such a passive term. "Oh, let me just sit here and wait to see if you think I'm acceptable. lalalala, I have no opinion."

Now I know not everyone views it that way. And this isn't meant to be insulting. It's just how I view it.

At the moment I'm making friends with two people, and I'm growing quite fond of them, but no clue whether it will ever go beyond friendship yet. There is some definitely flirting, however. I've also been exchanging notes with another guy who says he's moving to my area. So right now I'm NOT looking. I want to see what happens with this before I entertain any other thoughts.

So I'm considering, but not under consideration.

_____________________________

I'm not perving. I'm compensating for my myopia. So nyah.

Member of Cock-Suckers for World Peace

"Character is what you are in the dark."

- Lord John Whorfin

(in reply to Mercnbeth)

Post #: 15

RE: So unsublike, I have to post it here --"under ... - 12/4/2009 3:17:05 PM

NYLass

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Joined: 12/30/2008
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Mercnbeth

after we were in each other's physical presence for a couple of hours, there were a few nearby hotels seriously under consideration.

other than that, we had/have no use for the term. for those that do---more power to them.

_____________________________

I need a pithy saying here.

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RE: So unsublike, I have to post it here --"under ... - 12/4/2009 3:26:28 PM

sunshinemiss

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Joined: 11/26/2007
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You know... I vascillate with this term. I understand why people want to use it, and all, but frankly I have only one litty bitty thing about it. If I am considering an M type, does that make him under consideration too? If it doesn't, it should... And you know why? Because I'm still in the decision making stage...

Funny thing, I've never seen an M type have that on their profile.

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Yes, I am a wonton hussy... and still sweet as 3.14

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Post #: 17

RE: So unsublike, I have to post it here --"under ... - 12/4/2009 3:28:59 PM

Underumam

Posts: 485
Joined: 12/18/2008
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: sunshinemiss

You know... I vascillate with this term. I understand why people want to use it, and all, but frankly I have only one litty bitty thing about it. If I am considering an M type, does that make him under consideration too? If it doesn't, it should... And you know why? Because I'm still in the decision making stage...

Funny thing, I've never seen an M type have that on their profile.

lol. Yes, come to think of it, the Domme that was considering me, didn't mention that she was under consideration as well.:)

< Message edited by Underumam -- 12/4/2009 3:33:28 PM >

(in reply to sunshinemiss)

Post #: 18

RE: So unsublike, I have to post it here --"under ... - 12/4/2009 3:33:10 PM

Mercnbeth

Posts: 11766
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: NYLass

quote:

ORIGINAL: Mercnbeth
after we were in each other's physical presence for a couple of hours, there were a few nearby hotels seriously under consideration.

other than that, we had/have no use for the term. for those that do---more power to them.

Well....In reality, most times - we just pull over!

beth's just trying to make us sound like we're less slutty than we really are.

Speaking of which, I couldn't break away for lunch like I hoped after that post in the 'clean-up' thread but after this post that's it - I'm cutting out of the office

It's the WEEKEND!

Heat up the hot tub!

Unlock the dungeon!

ITS PARTY TIME!

Merc has left the office....

(in reply to NYLass)

Post #: 19

RE: So unsublike, I have to post it here --"under ... - 12/4/2009 4:01:09 PM

GYPSYMAMBO

Posts: 660
Joined: 9/26/2009
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Aynne88

No way in hell would I ever be deemed "under consideration". I am not a new car, or a job offer. How much can I get you to show me on your web cam and how much fucking phone sex can I get is what that term says to me

this is a really good point..some doink always TWISTS shit for their own agenda..
I agree with you totally..

GM

_____________________________

"Better served women will better serve the world"

** ** **

"A turd is still a turd even if it is shellaced!"

(in reply to Aynne88)

Post #: 20

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