RE: Do all Mistress's / Masters use pain

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RE: Do all Mistress's / Masters use pain - 12/10/2009 12:53:28 AM

rockspider

Posts: 633
Joined: 9/26/2009
Status: offline

I have been around for nearly 40 years. I know that dishing out pain is not my idea of fun. I do love the use of restraints, like cuffs, leashes and chains and as an old yachtsman i certainly can use a rope. I don't consider a slap on the bum as pain, and use it often to show assertiveness. Ok, many times that has been a problem, but then i just pass it bye and find one who fits my kink.

(in reply to WyldHrt)

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RE: Do all Mistress's / Masters use pain - 12/10/2009 1:01:17 AM

BKSir

Posts: 4037
Joined: 4/8/2008
From: Salt Lake City, UT
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Lockit

Ice cold showers? OMG... heartless! lol I would be in tears I tell ya!

Yeah, it took ONE time. No damage, no marks, no even lifting a finger, no pain whatsoever, just a couple minutes of HOLY CHRIST COLD! Now all I need to do is mutter the word "towel" and he snaps right in line.

It's like Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Gonna Run and Hide.

Honestly though, it's not my idea originally, someone else here mentioned it, and I LOVED the thought.

You'd be surprised at how well a squirt gun works too, like with cats. It's astonishingly effective! Except when it's 110 deg. outside.

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RE: Do all Mistress's / Masters use pain - 12/10/2009 1:07:25 AM

WyldHrt

Posts: 6412
Joined: 6/5/2008
Status: offline

quote:

Oh good, because I may be back your way rather soon.

Yippeee!

[/hijack]

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RE: Do all Mistress's / Masters use pain - 12/10/2009 1:18:28 AM

childoftheshadow

Posts: 458
Joined: 8/2/2006
From: London UK
Status: offline

Personally I do have one heck of a sadistic streak and I do enjoy inflicting a fair bit of pain. Thankfully the person I'm seeing at the moment enjoys being on the recieving end of it. However, pain hasn't always been a part of my "play" and it always depends on the other person. I don't consider a light spanking or teeth/nails during sex to be pain, but I imagine some people would. I've never used pain as proper punishment - play punishment yes "you've been naughty, I'm going to punish you" - proper punishments, for me, need to teach the one being punished something and really whooping them just teaches them that I've got a hell of a swing (and they generally already know that).

(in reply to WyldHrt)

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RE: Do all Mistress's / Masters use pain - 12/10/2009 2:36:07 AM

MsMillgrove

Posts: 260
Joined: 5/27/2008
Status: offline

Because all my subs have been pain-avoiders, and I thought I too couldn't dish out any pain, I avoided it. Yet, I've learned that until I have tried something, I don't really "know" what I like or dislike. For me, it comes down to the person, not so much the activity. I've become good at delivering pain because I wanted to learn the skills and found two play partners who are much bigger than I am, both former doms and trustworthy. Willing to give feedback and advice. With them, I was able to sharpen my skills, gain confidence and discover that I love impact play.

Over time, I've been introducing my offline subs to pain, in tiny steps, with the same idea--that they don't "know" if they like or not. The assesment on that, so for, is that if you go very slowly, you lose your fear, you build up tolerance and discover the "high" you get from pain. If you haven't been there, it's hard to describe, maybe something like the effect of morphine after a big surgery? You still have clarity but there's a sense of floating above everything.
I want my subs to desire pain, to increase their threshold for it, so I never use pain as correction (punishment).

I agree, you don't need pain for a strong, happy d/s dynamic, but if you've never tried it, maybe you want to do some small experiments to see if it helps you and your subs grow. Again though, when looking to develope desire for pain, not a good idea to use as correction technique. It's not "needed", but it sure opens up a new world if you take an adventure in it.

(in reply to childoftheshadow)

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