RE: Expectations

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IronBear -> RE: Expectations (3/18/2006 6:28:15 AM)
This has been one of those really entertaining reads, thank you Level for posting it. << Grins at truesub >> Guess I’ll have to get on board earlier for the coffee but my automatic response would have been confusing: “Black wine, first slave, two sugars, no milk!” Now back to the question. As I was reading, I was thinking along the lines of My Expectations of a kajira, long term; What I would want from her immediately; What I would need her to do for me; What my hopes long term would be. With this thinking in place I’ll try to tabulate them as briefly as I am able with clarity. I should state that I am refering to a kajira ~ a Gorean slave girl here as they are all I know and understand.. Long Term Expectations: Constant growth. Constant development. To find her place and study to attain it. To develop an understanding of myself and Neets so as to be able to serve more completely. To be able to deal with Household aspects without my permission so that the house runs smoothly. To understand her place within House Iron Bear. A complete trust between us. Respect. What I Want From Her Immediately: Honesty Obedience Loyalty Courage (e.g the courage to talk to me about things which worry or frighten her.) Not to be nosey regarding my professional life and especially areas dealing with security What I Need Her To Do For Me: Learn my needs (e.g. when I need coffee before speaking to me or after eating). Learn how to make my coffee. Understand the chores list and ask questions so she knows how, what and when things need to be done. Understand that I have flexible schedules and be ready for such changes. I guess that covers everything, they are all really expectations just tabulated differently as is typical with a Virgonian Mindset..

xxblushesxx -> RE: Expectations (3/18/2006 6:38:26 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: MrDiscipline44 I'm mildly shocked, my dear blushes. You don't have chocolate chip cookies anywhere in your expectations. And here I have this whole freshly baked batch. Guess I'm not the Dominant for you then. Too bad for me. [:(] Only mildly shocked? Are you sleepy? Anyway, that's my excuse! Oh, and since I have recently decided food/drink control is a hard limit, I guess I just forgot to mention the cookies. Are there pecans in the cookies, Mr D.?... Just wonderin'...[:-]

Level -> RE: Expectations (3/18/2006 6:56:57 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: xxblushesxx My expectations of a dominant I would consider serving? Honesty Integrity Humour Flexibility Openness Strength A heart that is open to possibilities Oh...and...someone who would put up with me. [:-] Flexibility in what regard?

Level -> RE: Expectations (3/18/2006 7:02:21 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: IronBear This has been one of those really entertaining reads, thank you Level for posting it. Thank you for your contribution to it, IronBear. I see much of value in what you posted. Level

Evanesce -> RE: Expectations (3/18/2006 8:08:54 AM)
quote: i was teasing. i completely agree with your answer. You made it so simple, however (which is a good thing) so i was kidding about it. [:)] I figured that out later in the thread. Blame my business correspondence instructor from 25 years ago, who beat it into my head that one should always use as few words as necessary to get one's point across.

ownedgirlie -> RE: Expectations (3/18/2006 4:18:13 PM)
quote: I figured that out later in the thread. Blame my business correspondence instructor from 25 years ago, who beat it into my head that one should always use as few words as necessary to get one's point across. And that you did!! i liked it!

LATEXBABY64 -> RE: Expectations (3/18/2006 11:54:59 PM)
i remeber one time long ago being on a tank in the middle of no where broke down. as i laid under the stars that night looked up and relized how really life is just not the complex how huge the sky looked and the stars the stars never looked brighter do you know how you are doing the right thing its simple it will grow ten fold if your doing the wrong thing it will beat ya up its easy to type out behind a keyboard thoughts and ideas and concepts. i do not worry about what someone thinks or demands anymore i would not expect someone to be like me or me like them just try to fallow the simple rules of life honest hard working fun adventurous. but in bdsm i would rather take more of chance with stock markets then with people in the lifestyle except for a few i know who are blessing to who ever they find right now we are in a change time will tell if its for good or bad

IronBear -> RE: Expectations (3/19/2006 1:27:41 AM)
At least you post is a tad more readable and will improve when some one leads you by the hand and introduces you to punctuation and spell checks... I guess you'll understand that untill that time if I move past your posts rather than expend the energy trying to translate in workable english what you are saying......

xxblushesxx -> RE: Expectations (3/19/2006 9:32:07 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Level quote: ORIGINAL: xxblushesxx My expectations of a dominant I would consider serving? Honesty Integrity Humour Flexibility Openness Strength A heart that is open to possibilities Oh...and...someone who would put up with me. [:-] Flexibility in what regard? Hmm...you caught that, huh? I did try to sneak it in there...[:-] Yes, I actually did have something specific in mind. I would respectfully ask that any Master I submit to be willing to listen and possibly even re-consider his position and/or compromise upon hearing what I have to say... This has been a very important issue for me recently.

Angeni -> RE: Expectations (3/19/2006 9:48:08 AM)
I expect nothing more than for him to be true to himself.

Level -> RE: Expectations (3/19/2006 11:11:18 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: xxblushesxx Flexibility in what regard? Hmm...you caught that, huh? I did try to sneak it in there...[:-] Yes, I actually did have something specific in mind. I would respectfully ask that any Master I submit to be willing to listen and possibly even re-consider his position and/or compromise upon hearing what I have to say... This has been a very important issue for me recently. I do try to be observant laughs.........and I don't see anything "wrong" with what you posted just now. Key words in it for me were "respectfully" and "possibly"........not a thing wrong with that. Level

RiotGirl -> RE: Expectations (3/19/2006 8:25:55 PM)
i expect my kitten to stay off the roof and i'm still expecting it to snow in florida. half joking aside.. i'm told my expectations of ppl are too high. i expect never to be lied to or played and manipulated i expect, and even demand complete honesty i expect intelligence. them being able to read. openess and i expect them to know what i'm about.. as i expect them to let me know what they are about. i expect them to keep up and generally if they're not.. they arent on my friends list.

Honeycrisp -> RE: Expectations (3/19/2006 9:21:41 PM)
quote: I expect a patient dominant, one who is willing to invest time and effort to explore the potential relationship. I expect that we would discuss our philosophy of what D/s means to us individually in order to determine if we are a match. I expect him to refrain from any attempts to dominate until I have agreed to submit. I expect to build on a solid foundation of mutual interests and respect. I expect that we would understand that the other may be flawed in various but workable ways. I expect to have my questions answered, my thoughts and feelings heard. I expect to provide the same in return. I expect that we will both find joy in our respective roles as dominant and submissive to each other. I expect that I will seldom, if ever, be bored. I agree with catize. In addition, I expect to be pushed in positive directions, as I push myself. I expect to feel cherished, and be absolutely sure that he thinks I'm equal to him.

LATEXBABY64 -> RE: Expectations (3/19/2006 10:42:41 PM)
shakes head you know Iron Bear i am just not the person you should really pick at. I sugest you start fixing the trees in your own forest before those skeltons come out. I spend most of my time making things happen for people good things. I am sure karma will guide you to the best conclusion of your life. its why i really just do not waist my time to argue with someone who for whatever lifes reason has been stomped on so much can not see reality for which it presents its self in the most pure form. you do not like my post fine i do not like the way you dom or the way you couch people to dom. you create more poison then good other wise it would show!!!. and for those that are ready to jump on the band wagon i sugest you really look hard at long term facts verse short term fixes you might grow some shrugs. its only a website of words and concepts all for points of view. now Mr Bear sense you seem to have so much of what you one say a fuild way of speaking lets see your comment that would be more along the lines of what is been posted not my post of this site i am just being nice and saying it ends here after all the bdsm comunity is small you can look at it in two ways we can fight between our selves or we can watch as the world starts to rip whats left of a good thing apart choice is yours shrugs either way its post of observation [&:]

KittenWithaTwist -> RE: Expectations (3/19/2006 11:52:59 PM)
I "expect" very little. I expect him to be honest, loving, supportive, and genuine. What I want...a bit more extensive...but certainly not required.

IronBear -> RE: Expectations (3/20/2006 3:52:59 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: LATEXBABY64 shakes head you know Iron Bear i am just not the person you should really pick at. I sugest you start fixing the trees in your own forest before those skeltons come out. I spend most of my time making things happen for people good things. I am sure karma will guide you to the best conclusion of your life. its why i really just do not waist my time to argue with someone who for whatever lifes reason has been stomped on so much can not see reality for which it presents its self in the most pure form. you do not like my post fine i do not like the way you dom or the way you couch people to dom. you create more poison then good other wise it would show!!!. and for those that are ready to jump on the band wagon i sugest you really look hard at long term facts verse short term fixes you might grow some shrugs. its only a website of words and concepts all for points of view. now Mr Bear sense you seem to have so much of what you one say a fuild way of speaking lets see your comment that would be more along the lines of what is been posted not my post of this site i am just being nice and saying it ends here after all the bdsm comunity is small you can look at it in two ways we can fight between our selves or we can watch as the world starts to rip whats left of a good thing apart choice is yours shrugs either way its post of observation [&:] I seriously doubt that you will ever find any skeletons in my past.. They were ground to dust long ago. It matters not if you like my "Domming" or not. I don't Dom a single person and am not in the market to do so. Do I coach other's in Domming? Well no I don't, I reply to questions and give an opinion based on life experience and professional training. Like many people who post or speak in public forums, comments, advise and criticisms ate gold to some and poison to others. I'm aware that probably a small minority value anything I say, but if only one does and takes my comments and uses them to help themselves out of a problem I am well contented. If I was worried that I may offend any, then I would never bother to post or speak in any public forum.. I know nothing about you and I'm damned sure you know little about me.. However I was wrong to criticise the way you write, that is your style .. For that alone I appologise.

MHOO314 -> RE: Expectations (3/20/2006 4:44:31 AM)
An interesting question Level---I wrestle with the term "expectations" for at times I think they can be taken for granted--or taken to the extremes---IMHO, it is not all about the Dominant--there are two evolved beings involved with needs, wants, desires, hopes and dreams---based on that, I expect, reinforce and support: Openness: to express freely what one is, seeks, desires But I must provide the feeling of safety, security, and acceptance Honesty: its never the easy things one has a challenge with about honesty--but the hard things But I must demonstrate honesty for it is a two way street Acceptance: I may not be the perfect Domme, but I am the perfect one for you But I must inspire the air of acceptance, for what he is in all facets Trust: The Circle of protection exists at all times But I must reassure For it is from these that all else begins to grow and develop.

Level -> RE: Expectations (3/20/2006 5:11:39 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: MHOO314 An interesting question Level---I wrestle with the term "expectations" for at times I think they can be taken for granted--or taken to the extremes---IMHO, it is not all about the Dominant--there are two evolved beings involved with needs, wants, desires, hopes and dreams---based on that, I expect, reinforce and support: Openness: to express freely what one is, seeks, desires But I must provide the feeling of safety, security, and acceptance Honesty: its never the easy things one has a challenge with about honesty--but the hard things But I must demonstrate honesty for it is a two way street Acceptance: I may not be the perfect Domme, but I am the perfect one for you But I must inspire the air of acceptance, for what he is in all facets Trust: The Circle of protection exists at all times But I must reassure For it is from these that all else begins to grow and develop. Well stated, MH......a quick question before I'm late to work though smiles......."acceptance"....how does this come into play when the submissive shares thoughts/feelings/desires that clash with your philosophy of how things should be? Level PS.........and where are my font color controls??? lol

Level -> RE: Expectations (3/20/2006 5:12:38 AM)
Ah...........found them.........mumble mumble

catize -> RE: Expectations (3/20/2006 5:16:11 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Honeycrisp I expect to be pushed in positive directions, as I push myself. I expect to feel cherished, and be absolutely sure that he thinks I'm equal to him. I like these additions, especially the 'pushed in positive directions'!

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