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Getting an insult for a compliment - 3/18/2006 9:07:20 AM   
Saint


Posts: 279
Status: offline 		How many here have ever got insulted from someone on here when you see a profile that intrigues you, and you send that person a quick note complimenting them on it? I have had that happen twice now this week. I dont send a lot of notes or emails, but when I see a profile that is striking, I dont mind occasionally simply saying so. But to be insulted because you payed them a compliment, is rudeness in the extreme. What do you think?
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RE: Getting an insult for a compliment - 3/18/2006 9:12:32 AM   
MrDiscipline44


Posts: 1776
Joined: 1/5/2005
Status: offline 		Yup, it's rude. You'll find a lot of rude people running around. Bet you'll get one or two rude comments just for this thread. LOL

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RE: Getting an insult for a compliment - 3/18/2006 9:17:44 AM   
Driver1961


Posts: 459
Joined: 9/8/2005
Status: offline 		He enters, dips His lid;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;


Ha Saint! You are complaining that you are finding rude, obnoxious, illmannered people on the internet that slap your face for your holding out a hand in friendship?

Gee, I honestly have no idea what you are talking about! If it's women that you complain of - well they may post here to justify themselves as thinking that you were being facitious.... Facetious? Hell, two faced meanings!

Have you a point? Will they post their point? How long is a piece of string (longer than a 'single tail'?


A big smile to you Saint and I proffer my hand.


Warm regards to all

Paul, Sir to His Wild


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RE: Getting an insult for a compliment - 3/18/2006 9:22:41 AM   
Saint


Posts: 279
Status: offline 		You would think after 3 years of being on this website, I would be inured to insult. lol Im not saying that everyone is rude or obnoxious, far from it. I actually wasnt looking for friendship or anything, I make that quite certain right away by telling them that. I simply state that I think they did an excellent job on their profile, and then WHAM! Return insult for me even daring to compliment them. I know it shouldnt bother me, but outright rudeness for being nice does.

(in reply to Saint)
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RE: Getting an insult for a compliment - 3/18/2006 9:23:59 AM   
Saint


Posts: 279
Status: offline 		Eh, if I get rude comments from posting this, than obviously those people being insulted have a lot of personal issues and Im better off ignoring them.

(in reply to MrDiscipline44)
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RE: Getting an insult for a compliment - 3/18/2006 9:26:47 AM   
Saint


Posts: 279
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Driver1961



Have you a point? Will they post their point? How long is a piece of string (longer than a 'single tail'?


A big smile to you Saint and I proffer my hand.


Warm regards to all

Paul, Sir to His Wild



I guess my point is: What is the reason for being rude and obnoxious when someone pays you a compliment and then moves on? Cant people just accept the compliment with a smile and accept it as what it truly is, someone being polite?

(in reply to Driver1961)
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RE: Getting an insult for a compliment - 3/18/2006 9:30:22 AM   
TheTopHat


Posts: 39
Joined: 3/12/2006
Status: offline 		I'm not quite sure what the rule is pertaining to this but I suspect posting the original missive, with a copy of the reply to show the high class and quality of these people to all members may prove an effective detterent. Then again sometimes people of these ilk are too ignorant to even feel bad - so all we can do is shake our heads sadly and move on.

On a positive note I would like to add that I have complimented a few profiles that I was totally mismatched for and the responses were friendly and polite thankyou's so there are some very decent (I hate the word 'normal') people around.

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RE: Getting an insult for a compliment - 3/18/2006 9:35:04 AM   
Saint


Posts: 279
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: TheTopHat

I'm not quite sure what the rule is pertaining to this but I suspect posting the original missive, with a copy of the reply to show the high class and quality of these people to all members may prove an effective detterent. Then again sometimes people of these ilk are too ignorant to even feel bad - so all we can do is shake our heads sadly and move on.

On a positive note I would like to add that I have complimented a few profiles that I was totally mismatched for and the responses were friendly and polite thankyou's so there are some very decent (I hate the word 'normal') people around.

quote:

On a positive note I would like to add that I have complimented a few profiles that I was totally mismatched for and the responses were friendly and polite thankyou's so there are some very decent (I hate the word 'normal') people around.


I could post the email replies sans the names attached, but I realize that its beneath me to do so. There is no point to it, and it only makes me look like a vindictive bastard. lol

I couldnt agree with you more TheTopHat when you say that there are some very decent people on here. But its those very few who are in the minority and insult you, who make me pause and wonder why people cant accept a compliment.

(in reply to TheTopHat)
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RE: Getting an insult for a compliment - 3/18/2006 9:47:05 AM   
IronBear


Posts: 9008
Joined: 6/19/2005
From: Beenleigh, Qld, Australia
Status: offline 		Actually posting an email reply without the writer's permission (preferably posted too) is not good form y'see, it just isn't cricket.....

There are bound to be one or two who object to your post here and may even get rude, others may decide to make a joke about it but in any case it is best to either laugh too or ignore the attempts at fun... Well yes I tend to look for something to have a bit of a giggle about on the odd occasion.... Still I have to agree that there is no cause for some one to be insulting when you have paid them a gentlemanly complement. However my old lad, there all sorts here in the great CM Family.. The Good, The Bad and the plain But Ugly.. Given time you'll get used to us... BTW, is it possible that the people you sent complementary notes to had NO MEN on their profiles?? In any case just look at it as it is they who have lost and you have gained information about a couple of people whom you can ignor in the future....

Cheers and welcome to collarme.

< Message edited by IronBear -- 3/18/2006 9:48:26 AM >

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Master of Bruin Cottage

http://www.bruincottage.org

Your attitude, words & actions are yours. Take responsibility for them and the consequences they incur.

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(in reply to Saint)
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RE: Getting an insult for a compliment - 3/18/2006 9:58:47 AM   
TexasMaam


Posts: 1467
Joined: 6/22/2005
Status: offline 		Hmmm.

I've received a lot of vulgar, ugly, stupid, flippant, arrogant, condescending, insulting, and otherwise negative introductory emails.

I've received a few unremarkable introductory emails.

I've received some very interesting, intriguiging introductory emails.

I've received two complimentary introductory email from someone who read My posts here:
1. One of which I answered in kind, since we had the same limits and he had obviously read My profile.

2. The other I answered in rebuke, since he hadn't bothered to do so at all.

I don't know whether I should have rebuked the silly tomcat or not, I simply didn't want to encourage more discourse with him trying to 'explain' why a sub who wanted multiple partners and group activities was not one whose petition I would take seriously.

I'm not losing any sleep over it, either. : )

TexasMaam



(in reply to Saint)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: Getting an insult for a compliment - 3/18/2006 10:07:01 AM   
RavenMuse


Posts: 4030
Joined: 1/23/2006
Status: offline 		Unfortunatly with the net being what it is, it can be tricky to just pay someone a compliment without there being some assumption of there being an ulterior motive.

So far I guess I've been lucky so far, or simply that I have managed to word those compliments sufficiently well to have avoided any abuse for giving them.

Unfortunatly there ARE those out there who feel it appropriate to abuse people for no reason at all. Easy to respond appropriatly when they do though, no typing needed, simply block and delete!

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And it must follow, as the night the day,
Thou canst not then be false to any man.

Owner of metalmiss

(in reply to Saint)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: Getting an insult for a compliment - 3/18/2006 10:21:48 AM   
artglfr


Posts: 235
Joined: 4/8/2005
Status: offline 		Unfortunately it appears some people use this space as a way to vent. Not very many. Most of the ones I have replied to have been polite even as they told me "No!".

Don't let it bother You and being Polite is always a good way to be and anyone who responds negatively to one of Your Polite posts is obviously someone you are better off without anyway.

An insulting reply from anyone is just a fast way for you to realize in spite of their Profile they are NOT quite what You are seeking. You are lucky to find this out from the git go.

Good Luck in the future.

(in reply to RavenMuse)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: Getting an insult for a compliment - 3/18/2006 10:22:38 AM   
BitaTruble


Posts: 9779
Joined: 1/12/2006
From: Texas
Status: offline
quote:

I guess my point is: What is the reason for being rude and obnoxious when someone pays you a compliment and then moves on? Cant people just accept the compliment with a smile and accept it as what it truly is, someone being polite?


Don't lose heart, Saint. Many of us take the rare compliment with grace and appreciation. Don't let that stop your actions from being a gentleman and writing to compliment someone's efforts. It speaks to your character and good taste. ;)

Celeste

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Rock, paper, scissors."

He laughed. "You are the wisest woman I know."


(in reply to Saint)
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RE: Getting an insult for a compliment - 3/18/2006 10:29:19 AM   
QueenKimberlie


Posts: 13
Joined: 1/1/2006
Status: offline 		I had a guy email me once asking for sex during a rt session Ummmm no I told him back I do not have sex with subs... after that he said to me well take this as a compliement but if you didnt tie be down Id have to have sex with you.... Im sorry I didnt take that as a compliment ... But im not one to be rude if I get an email saying Im pretty I just w/b say Ty and move on

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RE: Getting an insult for a compliment - 3/18/2006 12:08:16 PM   
Level


Posts: 25145
Joined: 3/3/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Saint

How many here have ever got insulted from someone on here when you see a profile that intrigues you, and you send that person a quick note complimenting them on it? I have had that happen twice now this week. I dont send a lot of notes or emails, but when I see a profile that is striking, I dont mind occasionally simply saying so. But to be insulted because you payed them a compliment, is rudeness in the extreme. What do you think?


Some people think being rude or insulting makes them better, or strong, or "dominant".

And some rude people can be those things..........but the rudeness, that just makes them jackasses lol.

Level

(in reply to Saint)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: Getting an insult for a compliment - 3/18/2006 1:28:20 PM   
ChainedExistence


Posts: 507
Joined: 2/5/2005
Status: offline 		On occasion, I've commented on a well-written profile and I can't say I recall ever being blasted for it. Sometimes they have a poetic style that makes me think, or a funny way of seeing things that makes me laugh out loud. I'm not looking for anyone, but making a nice remark to someone to show your appreciation shouldn't make you feel like a heel. Not knowing exactly what you said though it's hard to know why people responded to it in a negative manner. Maybe the wording sounded like you were simply looking for a "line" to get in, and they weren't interested in what you had to offer. Then again, I've met plenty of people who delight in rude responses. All I can say is if you like to compliment people, continue to do so..just be willing to have a thick skin!

< Message edited by ChainedExistence -- 3/18/2006 1:29:31 PM >

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RE: Getting an insult for a compliment - 3/18/2006 1:48:00 PM   
TemptingNviceSub


Posts: 3054
Joined: 10/1/2005
Status: offline 		I too have done the same thing..I have come across a profile that struck a chord within me..wether they were bemoaning the fact of no success in their search or to say how well written their profile was.Now this was not a case of me pursuing them as their distance or youth or whatever was not for me.One I got a very kind thank you response, another no response and another who seemed to think I was trying as someone here said to get my foot in the door and I was not so politely rejected..YIKES!..(even though in e-mail I had said this is not me coming on to you but a sincere compliment to such and such).But anyway my point is that I possibly gave someone a smile and the negative aspects just didnt affect me much one way or another.I always try to pick my battles based on importance to me,or even worth the effort......be well...Tempting

(in reply to ChainedExistence)
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RE: Getting an insult for a compliment - 3/18/2006 2:31:11 PM   
windy135


Posts: 437
Joined: 10/17/2005
Status: offline 		I've complimented people on their profiles and have yet to get a rude remark back.. But I have gotten rude remarks for no reason at all. It's annoying but eh lots of things can bug me.. hope it doesnt happen to you anymore Saint.

(in reply to TemptingNviceSub)
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RE: Getting an insult for a compliment - 3/18/2006 2:33:33 PM   
OscarHargraves


Posts: 693
Joined: 8/9/2005
Status: offline 		You couldn't be righter my friend.

Unfortunately the words of EmeraldSlave (now Lucky Albatross) come to mind:

"Expect everyone on the internest to be rude, impolite and obnoxious. Then be happily surprised each time someone is not." Or something like that. You get my meaning.
Apologies to LA if I quoted you wrong lady. I meant well.

< Message edited by OscarHargraves -- 3/18/2006 2:34:20 PM >

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Profile   Post #: 19
RE: Getting an insult for a compliment - 3/18/2006 2:50:39 PM   
fastlane


Posts: 2159
Joined: 5/26/2005
Status: offline 		I've stopped being rude and have issued several.."I'm sorry's" So, what the hell is wrong with issuing one more
"I'm sorry" But I swear it wasn't me....My Jack Daniels has been locked up for a month now! I HOPE YOU FEEL BETTER NOW....I KNOW I DO.

Peace, Kevin

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Just because it hurts, doesn't necessarily make it a bad thing.

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