RE: thoughts on being in the lifestyle

RE: thoughts on being in the lifestyle (Full Version)

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osf -> RE: thoughts on being in the lifestyle (12/26/2009 7:28:35 PM)
I've been recently thinking of how to describe myself in context of my sexual expression to accurately explain who and what i am and not get lost in the noise in the systen

LadyAngelika -> RE: thoughts on being in the lifestyle (12/26/2009 7:36:28 PM)
quote: my thinking is that lots of words that are used to describe people and activities of people that congregate on sites like cm are used in too many ways to describe anything the speaker wishes it to mean. i just wish we could bring order to the chaos it's gotten to the point i don't claim to be anything but a nice guy and creative misogynist If we were robots, this might work... I just stopped getting hung up on other people's definitions and I just live my life (not lifestyle). - LA

osf -> RE: thoughts on being in the lifestyle (12/26/2009 7:37:35 PM)
i'm not going through a sexual identity crises just a sexual identity definition crises

vincentML -> RE: thoughts on being in the lifestyle (12/26/2009 7:37:53 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: osf I've been recently thinking of how to describe myself in context of my sexual expression to accurately explain who and what i am and not get lost in the noise in the systen Why not just be yourself on a person to person interaction? Please explain what system you are referring to. I see very little that is systematic in these environs. Just a lot of people interacting and trying to connect with each other.

osf -> RE: thoughts on being in the lifestyle (12/26/2009 7:40:15 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: vincentML quote: ORIGINAL: osf I've been recently thinking of how to describe myself in context of my sexual expression to accurately explain who and what i am and not get lost in the noise in the systen Why not just be yourself on a person to person interaction? Please explain what system you are referring to. I see very little that is systematic in these environs. Just a lot of people interacting and trying to connect with each other. because of the weather maybe i got too much free time and am filling it up with analytical thought

LadyAngelika -> RE: thoughts on being in the lifestyle (12/26/2009 7:42:14 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: osf i'm not going through a sexual identity crises just a sexual identity definition crises I would even say you aren't a real misogynist because you seem to be giving the women's opinions here as much respect as you do to the men's :-p - LA

LadyPact -> RE: thoughts on being in the lifestyle (12/26/2009 8:08:00 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: osf because of the weather maybe i got too much free time and am filling it up with analytical thought I'd probably agree with the too much free time part, though it would be a real stretch to blame the weather.

osf -> RE: thoughts on being in the lifestyle (12/26/2009 8:11:19 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: LadyAngelika quote: ORIGINAL: osf i'm not going through a sexual identity crises just a sexual identity definition crises I would even say you aren't a real misogynist because you seem to be giving the women's opinions here as much respect as you do to the men's :-p - LA hey, watch your mouth i have this strange philosophy own the body, own the mind, use both , so yes i can listen to her advice

Underumam -> RE: thoughts on being in the lifestyle (12/26/2009 8:18:00 PM)
It's a state of mind for me. One who lives daily life as an D or s is imo, living the lifestyle....

QuirkyAnne -> RE: thoughts on being in the lifestyle (12/26/2009 8:28:42 PM)
I agree with the first point, the second however, I see problems with. From what I've seen in my exploration of BDSM, is that there are several different "lifestyles" within the BDSM community, from those who live in 24/7 TPE relationships, to those who only engage in this activity on the weekends or at play parties, and those like me who are submissive only in the bedroom. From there, you have the question of what is "kinky." Is it the leather-lovers who enjoy spanking and flogging, the pain-lovers who can't get enough of knife, needle, and blood play, or my buddies back in Columbia who were in a M/s relationship in which there was no physical pain involved at all, merely severe mental control and punishment? Anne

osf -> RE: thoughts on being in the lifestyle (12/26/2009 8:31:42 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: QuirkyAnne I agree with the first point, the second however, I see problems with. From what I've seen in my exploration of BDSM, is that there are several different "lifestyles" within the BDSM community, from those who live in 24/7 TPE relationships, to those who only engage in this activity on the weekends or at play parties, and those like me who are submissive only in the bedroom. Anne then somehow these should be differentiated

LadyAngelika -> RE: thoughts on being in the lifestyle (12/26/2009 8:32:31 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: osf quote: ORIGINAL: LadyAngelika quote: ORIGINAL: osf i'm not going through a sexual identity crises just a sexual identity definition crises I would even say you aren't a real misogynist because you seem to be giving the women's opinions here as much respect as you do to the men's :-p - LA hey, watch your mouth No need. I speak my mind and and I'm accountable for my words. quote: i have this strange philosophy own the body, own the mind, use both , so yes i can listen to her advice And you own neither in regards to myself or LadyPact and you still consider our opinions. Now I don't want to get into semantics, but for quite a few centuries, it has been agreed upon, at least in dictionaries, that misogyny is hatred, dislike, or mistrust of women. At least in your posts, you haven't been displaying this behaviour. And I'm not actually suggesting that you do. - LA

osf -> RE: thoughts on being in the lifestyle (12/26/2009 8:35:54 PM)
hey, watch your mouth this was joking i have this strange philosophy own the body, own the mind, use both , so yes i can listen to her advice this is a hypothetical about any woman i would own

osf -> RE: thoughts on being in the lifestyle (12/26/2009 8:39:05 PM)
quote: Now I don't want to get into semantics, but for quite a few centuries, it has been agreed upon, at least in dictionaries, that misogyny is hatred, dislike, or mistrust of women. At least in your posts, you haven't been displaying this behaviour. And I'm not actually suggesting that you do. i can actually get into a mindset about my love object where i can feel that way, at the time it's not an act

LadyAngelika -> RE: thoughts on being in the lifestyle (12/26/2009 8:39:36 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: osf hey, watch your mouth this was joking i have this strange philosophy own the body, own the mind, use both , so yes i can listen to her advice this is a hypothetical about any woman i would own You are apparently repeating yourself as I've already addressed this response 2 posts up. - LA

QuirkyAnne -> RE: thoughts on being in the lifestyle (12/26/2009 8:39:46 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: osf quote: ORIGINAL: QuirkyAnne I agree with the first point, the second however, I see problems with. From what I've seen in my exploration of BDSM, is that there are several different "lifestyles" within the BDSM community, from those who live in 24/7 TPE relationships, to those who only engage in this activity on the weekends or at play parties, and those like me who are submissive only in the bedroom. Anne then somehow these should be differentiated I don't think they can be. Anne

vincentML -> RE: thoughts on being in the lifestyle (12/26/2009 8:58:00 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: osf quote: ORIGINAL: QuirkyAnne I agree with the first point, the second however, I see problems with. From what I've seen in my exploration of BDSM, is that there are several different "lifestyles" within the BDSM community, from those who live in 24/7 TPE relationships, to those who only engage in this activity on the weekends or at play parties, and those like me who are submissive only in the bedroom. Anne then somehow these should be differentiated Clearly, they are already differentiated by the actors doing improvisation on the stage. Have you not noticed there is no writer or director in the play, but free spirits experimenting, exploring, changing, seeking new adventures? To differentiate and place labels on such a dynamic seems to do it a diservice. In fact seems to be a stifling of it and probably not possible or of any use other than an intellectual exercise. Like talking to my hand. You may wish to engage it solely for the purpose of intellectual activity, but I'm afraid there have already been a number of boring books written that have failed to capture the spirit and excitement of wiitwd.

osf -> RE: thoughts on being in the lifestyle (12/26/2009 9:00:43 PM)
quote: Clearly, they are already differentiated by the actors doing improvisation on the stage. Have you not noticed there is no writer or director in the play, but free spirits experimenting, exploring, changing, seeking new adventures? To differentiate and place labels on such a dynamic seems to do it a diservice. In fact seems to be a stifling of it and probably not possible or of any use other than an intellectual exercise. Like talking to my hand. You may wish to engage it solely for the purpose of intellectual activity, but I'm afraid there have already been a number of boring books written that have failed to capture the spirit and excitement of wiitwd. it's in my nature to question basic assumptions

QuirkyAnne -> RE: thoughts on being in the lifestyle (12/26/2009 9:15:21 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: vincentML Clearly, they are already differentiated by the actors doing improvisation on the stage. Have you not noticed there is no writer or director in the play, but free spirits experimenting, exploring, changing, seeking new adventures? To differentiate and place labels on such a dynamic seems to do it a diservice. In fact seems to be a stifling of it and probably not possible or of any use other than an intellectual exercise. Like talking to my hand. You may wish to engage it solely for the purpose of intellectual activity, but I'm afraid there have already been a number of boring books written that have failed to capture the spirit and excitement of wiitwd. Exactly. I've encountered this exact sentiment almost every time I talk to someone in the BDSM community and in some ways I still find it annoying because trying to find out what I was, was so confusing and I desperately wanted a "label" I could put on myself and be comfortable in. So far, the best I've been able to do is find a general category, but still have yet to put a person that can slap a sticker on me that reads exactly what my submissive contents contain. Anne

Justme696 -> RE: thoughts on being in the lifestyle (12/27/2009 12:32:25 AM)
quote: if you think your a dom/master/sub/slave and only have sat at a computer chatting about it, your not in the lifestyle ignoring the chat part...but we all think we are sub/slave/Dom or Domme. No one gives us a certificate of "beeing real". It is all based on opinions.

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