quote:

ORIGINAL: littlewonder

what do they have to do with me? That's what a dominant man is to me? That's what I seek??

<scratches head like she does a lot on these forums these days>

quote:

ORIGINAL: osf

quote:

ORIGINAL: littlewonder

what do they have to do with me? That's what a dominant man is to me? That's what I seek??

<scratches head like she does a lot on these forums these days>

im not being a smart ass

but would you not be happy with less than all of those?

quote:

ORIGINAL: littlewonder

quote:

ORIGINAL: osf

quote:

ORIGINAL: littlewonder

what do they have to do with me? That's what a dominant man is to me? That's what I seek??

<scratches head like she does a lot on these forums these days>

im not being a smart ass

but would you not be happy with less than all of those?

No

quote:

ORIGINAL: littlewonder

what do they have to do with me? That's what a dominant man is to me? That's what I seek??

<scratches head like she does a lot on these forums these days>

quote:

ORIGINAL: osf

quote:

ORIGINAL: littlewonder

what do they have to do with me? That's what a dominant man is to me? That's what I seek??

<scratches head like she does a lot on these forums these days>

you do realize that there are very few that fit that, and they are usually heads of state?

quote:

ORIGINAL: GYPSYMAMBO

quote:

ORIGINAL: osf

I'm curious, all the female submissives say the want one but what do they think a dom is?

Some seek a DOMME
 
GM

quote:

ORIGINAL: Mercnbeth

Many (most?) don't know and don't post about "what a dom is", or from the other side, "what a sub is". They are however, VERY, precise, clear, and have a concept of what a dom, or 'their' dom/sub is not. Usually they get those concepts from observing posts and perceive behavior, personality, and ability from the words the dom/sub write.

Worse case, they see behavior conveyed in such a way that they forget about pursuing any relationship not wanting any part of the person behind the persona; deciding they are better off without dominance or submission in their life if the image being conveyed is typical of a 'lifestyle' participant. Unfortunately many think and say "all" making universal assumptions and projecting, if not actually believing, in a 'one true way'.

Some come here and, through their posts, convey a pyramid hierarchy of needs so pointed that a pin is at it's peak; then wonder why a submissive (or dom) isn't dancing on the point; when they believed, and expected since this 'lifestyle' they 'discovered' was full of 'submissives', all that was necessary was to label yourself a 'dom' and he would be able to count and choose from the many dancing on the point.

quote:

OP, I think of there being two places where a Dom can be a Dom:  in the bedroom and out of it.

quote:

ORIGINAL: osf

cmail

quote:

ORIGINAL: osf

quote:

OP, I think of there being two places where a Dom can be a Dom:  in the bedroom and out of it.

never understood that

is there a force field in the doorway that turns him on and off?

quote:

ORIGINAL: Aynne88

I think OSF has gotten a bad rap from the way he started here, and I also think that he poses some sincere and genuinely curious questions. I'll bite .

quote:

ORIGINAL: Aynne88

I think OSF has gotten a bad rap from the way he started here, and I also think that he poses some sincere and genuinely curious questions. I'll bite .

My idea of a dominant is someone that is dominant in all facets of life, not just dominating me. I need the man that is powerful and respected socially, in the community, in the business world. I like a bit of a bastard in the "outside" world as well, youknow, the kind of man the people say "He's no one you want to piss off" Or "He's someone good to have on your side." Also respected of course, because he has earned it. I went through more than a few poseurs to fine the real one. I like a man that can take charge with a sommelier in a restaurant, is educated, traveled, opinionated, can converse with a diverse group of people without being too "much" and just naturally draws respect seemlessly because he cuts and authoritative figure.

On a more personal level, I need a man that frightens me just a bit, because it turns me on to not know when he might have planned. A while ago there was a thread on "funishment" and it just isn't my thing. I don't like jokers, not for me personally as my Dominant, I need a stern figure. I need a sadist, with a high sex drive, that doesn't feel bad when he tells me to clean in lingerie, fix him a cocktail, or whatever else he wants done, and he might kiss me or slap me, I have no idea, and for me, that is thrilling. If I screw up, usually with me it's my mouth, I get it, and get it badly. I need a man that inspires me to want to sit at his feet, and crave whatever attention he doles out, pain, pleasure, a two hour conversation, or quietly massaging his feet. Of course we laugh, a lot, but I think most people know I mean by a joker and funishment. For us, we are both pretty intense people, and it would seem contrived if we acted that way with each other. He has a really stressful outside life so at home, he is usually quiet, talkative yes, but not clowning around, and lots of times his release is using me sexually or releasing frustrations physically, and that is exactly what I need to, even when I may not want it. I also need a man that is adept at humiliation, and lastly, loves me as fiercely as I love him.

I hope this helps and wasn't too "wordy."

quote:

ORIGINAL: sexyred1

Hi hon, I hear you. I don't agree, but as you said, time will tell. I think that other person just has a hard on for ya, babe and like the little boy in school who pulls the little girl's pigtail pretending not to like her, maybe that is what is going on there?

Oh, and your definition of a perfect Dom for you, is almost identical to mine. Love it.