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RE: New submissives - 1/6/2010 10:03:13 AM   
breatheasone


Posts: 4004
Joined: 7/14/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: OsideGirl

quote:

ORIGINAL: Knighthunter862

Now i know opinions are like assholes and everyone has one.So guys id like to hear yours.
My personal opinion is that mentors should be on the same side of the kneel and that there should be no sex or scening between mentor and mentoree.

Second part of this is: CollarMe is vapor and ether, why do you care? Is there going to be a cyber beat up?

This is SO right-on! TOO many D-types use "mentoring" to get laid, or playtime.


_____________________________

Romans 10:13,For whosoever shall call upon the name of the Lord shall be saved.
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(in reply to OsideGirl)
Profile   Post #: 21
RE: New submissives - 1/6/2010 10:21:09 AM   
lally2


Posts: 2621
Joined: 4/16/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Knighthunter862

In a definition lally he felt that after speaking to her for 30 mins she should be kneeling and collared and when told hed have to soeak to me the insults begin.Hope that helps.



not really.

an arsewipe thinks he can collar and own a woman after 30 mins on line.

ok, clearly a lesson in who to avoid and how to apply block and delete.

lesson to sub = priceless.



_____________________________

So all I have to do in order to serve him, is to work out exactly how improbable he is, feed that figure into the finite improbability generator, give him a fresh cup of really hot tea ... and turn him on!

(in reply to Knighthunter862)
Profile   Post #: 22
RE: New submissives - 1/6/2010 10:21:54 AM   
atypicalsub


Posts: 284
Joined: 4/11/2008
From: an atypical sub
Status: offline 		How is that whoring her out???? 
I'm a relatively new submissive myself, in my first D/s relationship, have only been exploring the lifestyle about a year and a half now.  Personally I consider it a big red flag if a Dominant won't let their submissive communicate with other people in the lifestyle.



_____________________________

Polyamorous, solitary eclectic pagan, pansexual slut, and personal pet of MistressYes

"Do not do anything you are ashamed of, and don't be ashamed of anything you do"
(although I'm sure my bio-family wishes I did less and was ashamed of more)


(in reply to Knighthunter862)
Profile   Post #: 23
RE: New submissives - 1/6/2010 10:51:47 AM   
GYPSYMAMBO


Posts: 660
Joined: 9/26/2009
Status: offline 		OP:
I am a mentor(real time) to a young man...20...and a young woman..18
We discussed this role and also I sent him/her to the mentor group on fetlife and
I sent him here to check forums and threads..
IF YOU and your girl are clear on what the mentorship is about..its parameters and boundries then
fuk anyone who crosses them..block assholes..have her NOT talk to freaks..
TEACH HER how to sense assholes such as this guy in about 2 sentences and cease talking if there are creeps..
Teach her HOW to have the esteem to not let these pricks bother her with theri immature tactics.
A MENTOR is a GUIDE..friend..protector..filter..and must employ espansion and magnification of their charges STRENGTHS..
 
IF YOU WANT TO TALK TO ME ON THE OTher SIDE I AM HAPPY TO DISCUSS HOW I PRECIEVE MENTORING..
 
GM

< Message edited by GYPSYMAMBO -- 1/6/2010 10:52:06 AM >

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(in reply to atypicalsub)
Profile   Post #: 24
RE: New submissives - 1/6/2010 12:44:05 PM   
HisSweetElysium


Posts: 600
Joined: 11/12/2009
Status: offline 		that's silly, but also a good lesson, it's the internet, people say stupid things.  Just got to take it in stride.  Master gets mad at some of the things ppl say to me here, but I'm a big girl, and can handle it myself. As far as mentoring, I got some wonderful guidance and help from Doms, far more than from subs actually.  These were people on the other side of the world, typically older, who wanted to help me out a bit with no real agenda other than suggesting I proceed cautiously in my explorations. The very first CM email I got was from a Dom advising me of the "lay of the land" on the boards and with the profiles and such, and he has proven to be 100% correct, and is still a trusted and valued friend. 

just to offer, she can email me any time she wishes.


_____________________________

“This is love: to fly toward a secret sky, to cause a hundred veils to fall each moment. First to let go of life. Finally, to take a step without feet.” Rumi

(in reply to GYPSYMAMBO)
Profile   Post #: 25
RE: New submissives - 1/6/2010 12:59:05 PM   
lovingpet


Posts: 4270
Joined: 6/19/2005
Status: offline 		I'm not much for the mentoring thing, but I have seen it be positive both as you have it set up and as others have described. My issue with it has more to do with having someone else select my knowledge base and what is supposed to be important to me. I prefer to direct my own learning for the most part.

As for this other person, I smell a poacher. This and many other places can help along the path. I know it helped me in the early going. I don't know what exactly you sent her here to learn, but as long as you aren't having her learn "skills" by "hands on" experience the idea that you are whoring her out doesn't hold water. Now if she were your collared submissive partner and you were sending her out for "hands on" practice, that is your call. I would tend to view it as lazy or genius, but it wouldn't be anyone's place to determine the dynamics of your relationship. Somebody wants her to cast aside her mentor. Those motives are very likely impure. Just my thoughts.

lovingpet

_____________________________

If you put your head into more, you'd have to put your back into less. ~Me

10 Fluffy pts.


(in reply to gift4mistress)
Profile   Post #: 26
RE: New submissives - 1/6/2010 1:01:41 PM   
DarlingSavage


Posts: 2808
Joined: 9/18/2009
Status: offline
quote:

I will trade you a Big Mac... AND a shake... for a blow job.


What are you trying to do? Poison people? That's hardly a fair trade! What a rip off! Someone gives you a blow job and in return, they get poisonous, genetically modified objects disguised as sustenance. You really are sadistic!

(in reply to Jeffff)
Profile   Post #: 27
RE: New submissives - 1/6/2010 6:08:57 PM   
OsideGirl


Posts: 14441
Joined: 7/1/2005
From: United States
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: gift4mistress

quote:

ORIGINAL: Aileen1968

male submissives mentored by male submissives, etc. etc. etc.



I wouldn't let a dude mentor me though I wouldn't mind getting advice from one.

Have you looked at the definition of Mentor? It's someone that gives you advice and guides you. Not quite sure why you wouldn't let a "dude" provide that for you.


 

_____________________________

Give a girl the right shoes and she will conquer the world. ~ Marilyn Monroe

The Accelerated Velocity of Terminological Inexactitude

(in reply to gift4mistress)
Profile   Post #: 28
RE: New submissives - 1/6/2010 6:16:30 PM   
DarkSteven


Posts: 28072
Joined: 5/2/2008
Status: offline 		OP, I cannot answer you because I don't know what your "mentoring" consists of.  If it's the proper use of safewords and how to contact the local community, that's one thing.  But if it's the proper way to suck cock and do a striptease, that's something else altogether.

Sending her to collarme, especially to the forums, isn't a bad idea.  But I would recommend against letting her do it without a guide at first.




_____________________________

"You women....

The small-breasted ones want larger breasts. The large-breasted ones want smaller ones. The straight-haired ones curl their hair, and the curly-haired ones straighten theirs...

Quit fretting. We men love you."

(in reply to OsideGirl)
Profile   Post #: 29
RE: New submissives - 1/6/2010 6:58:49 PM   
OsideGirl


Posts: 14441
Joined: 7/1/2005
From: United States
Status: offline 		Are you afraid that we bite Steven? <grin>

_____________________________

Give a girl the right shoes and she will conquer the world. ~ Marilyn Monroe

The Accelerated Velocity of Terminological Inexactitude

(in reply to DarkSteven)
Profile   Post #: 30
RE: New submissives - 1/6/2010 7:07:56 PM   
osf


Posts: 3288
Joined: 10/19/2009
Status: offline
quote:

an arsewipe thinks he can collar and own a woman after 30 mins on line.


believe it or not i have had that experience from women wanting to latch onto me after 30 mins

though it is not as common as with men it does happen, it's that most men think it flattering and they have made a conquest
instead a of a hormonal submissive grabbing the first thing that talks to them

_____________________________

all around nice guy and creative misogynist

i'm not very skilled so i just hit harder

i want a woman to make into the woman she never wanted to become

(in reply to lally2)
Profile   Post #: 31
RE: New submissives - 1/6/2010 7:13:19 PM   
AquaticSub


Posts: 14867
Joined: 12/27/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact

quote:

ORIGINAL: Aileen1968

Personally, I hate the concept of mentoring, but if someone is going to go and do that she should be mentored by a female submissive. Not a male dominant. It always makes me suspicious of the mentor.

edited to clarify....female submissives mentored by female submissives, male submissives mentored by male submissives, etc. etc. etc.

This.


quote:

ORIGINAL: OsideGirl
My personal opinion is that mentors should be on the same side of the kneel and that there should be no sex or scening between mentor and mentoree.

Second part of this is: CollarMe is vapor and ether, why do you care? Is there going to be a cyber beat up?

And this.



Thirded.

quote:


I wouldn't let a dude mentor me though I wouldn't mind getting advice from one.

What, you don't ever take advice from males?

_____________________________

Without my dominance you cannot submit. Without your submission I cannot dominate. You are my equal in this, though our roles are different.-Val

It was ok for him to beat me but then he tried to cuddle me! - Me

Member:Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair

(in reply to LadyPact)
Profile   Post #: 32
RE: New submissives - 1/6/2010 7:27:13 PM   
heartcream


Posts: 3044
Joined: 5/9/2007
From: Psychoalphadiscobetabioaquadoloop
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: mnottertail


quote:

ORIGINAL: Aileen1968

Personally, I hate the concept of mentoring, but if someone is going to go and do that she should be mentored by a female submissive. Not a male dominant. It always makes me suspicious of the mentor.

edited to clarify....female submissives mentored by female submissives, male submissives mentored by male submissives, etc. etc. etc.


Ja, fuck you Aileen, no cocks would ever get sucked the way you wanna go about it...........you're outta here; clown.

Ron


Am I missing something or Ron, are you talking about your dick being sucked in almost every post you make? Is this new or have you always been so? I am feeling a maniacal level happening lately. Is this so?

_____________________________

"Exaggerate the essential, leave the obvious vague." Vincent Van Gogh

I'd Rather Be With You

Every single line means something.
Jean-Michel Basquiat



(in reply to mnottertail)
Profile   Post #: 33
RE: New submissives - 1/6/2010 7:28:31 PM   
KatyLied


Posts: 13029
Joined: 2/24/2005
From: Pennsylvania
Status: offline 		Ron has always been about finding the ultimate blowjob.  All men are.  He just talks about it more than most.

_____________________________

“If you want to live a happy life, tie it to a goal, not to people or things.”
- Albert Einstein

(in reply to heartcream)
Profile   Post #: 34
RE: New submissives - 1/6/2010 7:35:46 PM   
Delphinus


Posts: 146
Joined: 11/26/2008
Status: offline 		I don't think the boards are especially helpful, but some people I have met through CM have been quite helpful over the years. (I've been on CM longer than my current profile.)

< Message edited by Delphinus -- 1/6/2010 7:36:18 PM >

_____________________________

"Silly bitch."

(in reply to Knighthunter862)
Profile   Post #: 35
RE: New submissives - 1/7/2010 10:25:41 PM   
Acer49


Posts: 1434
Joined: 8/7/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Aileen1968

Personally, I hate the concept of mentoring, but if someone is going to go and do that she should be mentored by a female submissive. Not a male dominant. It always makes me suspicious of the mentor.

edited to clarify....female submissives mentored by female submissives, male submissives mentored by male submissives, etc. etc. etc.

What attribute is it that a male dominant might be missing that would not make him a good mentor? What suspicion is that? Your logical reason for this suspicion is and your data to back it up is?

_____________________________

Never be bullied into silence. Never allow yourself to be made a victim. Accept no one's definition of your life; define yourself.
Harvey Fierstein

(in reply to Aileen1968)
Profile   Post #: 36
RE: New submissives - 1/7/2010 10:28:21 PM   
NormalOutside


Posts: 622
Joined: 1/8/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Knighthunter862

Recently as in three weeks ago i tookon a young 21 year old submissive comepletely new to the lifestyle and agreed to mentor and guide her.I felt that collar me would be a good place for her to speak with others Doms and subs alike to help further her knowledge in the lifestyle.recntly a Dom who i wont mention became angry and stated that basically i was whoring her out and that she didnt belong here.Now i know opinions are like assholes and everyone has one.So guys id like to hear yours.

Only you know if you were whoring her out or not. Were you? And if so, is that a bad thing?
If all you did was have her sign up here, that's not whoring her out. But you didn't exactly say what you had her do, so any advice you get here is based on guesses.


_____________________________

I won't see your reply, because I don't use this account anymore.

(in reply to Knighthunter862)
Profile   Post #: 37
RE: New submissives - 1/7/2010 10:38:53 PM   
Acer49


Posts: 1434
Joined: 8/7/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: KatyLied

Ron has always been about finding the ultimate blowjob.  All men are.  He just talks about it more than most.

Unless you attempting to write fantasy, the word "All" is never followed the word men or women

_____________________________

Never be bullied into silence. Never allow yourself to be made a victim. Accept no one's definition of your life; define yourself.
Harvey Fierstein

(in reply to KatyLied)
Profile   Post #: 38
RE: New submissives - 1/7/2010 10:59:15 PM   
Acer49


Posts: 1434
Joined: 8/7/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: breatheasone

quote:

ORIGINAL: OsideGirl

quote:

ORIGINAL: Knighthunter862

Now i know opinions are like assholes and everyone has one.So guys id like to hear yours.
My personal opinion is that mentors should be on the same side of the kneel and that there should be no sex or scening between mentor and mentoree.

Second part of this is: CollarMe is vapor and ether, why do you care? Is there going to be a cyber beat up?

This is SO right-on! TOO many D-types use "mentoring" to get laid, or playtime.


While I do agree that sex should not be part of mentoring, I see nothing wrong with exposing a new submissive to activities that they may find enjoyable. A mentor must have knowledge and that is not restricted to any one side of the kneel

_____________________________

Never be bullied into silence. Never allow yourself to be made a victim. Accept no one's definition of your life; define yourself.
Harvey Fierstein

(in reply to breatheasone)
Profile   Post #: 39
RE: New submissives - 1/7/2010 11:13:15 PM   
Acer49


Posts: 1434
Joined: 8/7/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Knighthunter862

Recently as in three weeks ago i tookon a young 21 year old submissive comepletely new to the lifestyle and agreed to mentor and guide her.I felt that collar me would be a good place for her to speak with others Doms and subs alike to help further her knowledge in the lifestyle.recntly a Dom who i wont mention became angry and stated that basically i was whoring her out and that she didnt belong here.Now i know opinions are like assholes and everyone has one.So guys id like to hear yours.


As to the "whoring out" statement or whether or not she belongs here, neither have logical basis and are not worthy of comment. I see nothing wrong with what you are attempting to do, provided it is done with honesty and integrity.

_____________________________

Never be bullied into silence. Never allow yourself to be made a victim. Accept no one's definition of your life; define yourself.
Harvey Fierstein

(in reply to Knighthunter862)
Profile   Post #: 40
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