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Silly comment - 1/6/2010 5:35:40 PM   
Callisto643


Posts: 2
Status: offline 		I read somewhere that this submissive girl felt that dominant females are just alpha subs.  I felt this was a flawed statement, assuming that the female really isn't getting what she wanted, and I couldn't disagree more.  I believe dominant women are strong and know what they like and through this they find subs who complement their wants, thus creating two satisfied parties.  Any thoughts?  I don't know why, but this type of comment irks me.  Why be in the scene if you have no respect for the other players?
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RE: Silly comment - 1/6/2010 5:40:50 PM   
Jeffff


Posts: 12600
Joined: 7/7/2007
Status: offline 		A Female Dominant is a woman who just hasn't met the right man yet.


Welcome to the boards!


Jeffwey

_____________________________

"If you don't live it, it won't come out your horn." Charlie Parker

(in reply to Callisto643)
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RE: Silly comment - 1/6/2010 5:41:35 PM   
LadyAngelika


Posts: 8070
Joined: 7/4/2004
Status: offline
quote:

I felt this was a flawed statement


You feelings were correct.

You can't assume that because someone identifies with BDSM that they all of a sudden got hit with a whack load of common sense, compassion and an open mind. Some people are just close-minded and fear what they don't understand.

I've always assumed that the men who are the most against the concept of FemDoms are men who are afraid of their own vulnerabilities.

That said, all the very excellent male Doms that I know hold FemDoms in very high regard. That might be a tell for some submissive women.

As always, YMMV.

- LA

_____________________________

Une main de fer dans un gant de velours ~ An iron hand in a velvet glove

(in reply to Callisto643)
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RE: Silly comment - 1/6/2010 5:42:57 PM   
Jeffff


Posts: 12600
Joined: 7/7/2007
Status: offline 		So, you're saying I'm wrong?........:)


Jeff


_____________________________

"If you don't live it, it won't come out your horn." Charlie Parker

(in reply to LadyAngelika)
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RE: Silly comment - 1/6/2010 5:42:57 PM   
LadyAngelika


Posts: 8070
Joined: 7/4/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Jeffff

A Female Dominant is a woman who just hasn't met the right man yet.


Welcome to the boards!


Jeffwey


And a male dominant is just a man who hasn't felt the tip of my whip and my strap-on yet.

Bend over Jeffwey. Resistance is futile!

- LA

_____________________________

Une main de fer dans un gant de velours ~ An iron hand in a velvet glove

(in reply to Jeffff)
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RE: Silly comment - 1/6/2010 5:44:36 PM   
Jeffff


Posts: 12600
Joined: 7/7/2007
Status: offline 		I have got to stop reading these nonsensical posts!



Jeff

_____________________________

"If you don't live it, it won't come out your horn." Charlie Parker

(in reply to LadyAngelika)
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RE: Silly comment - 1/6/2010 5:45:58 PM   
LadyAngelika


Posts: 8070
Joined: 7/4/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Jeffff

I have got to stop reading these nonsensical posts!

Jeff


Exactly! And just bend over...



- LA

_____________________________

Une main de fer dans un gant de velours ~ An iron hand in a velvet glove

(in reply to Jeffff)
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RE: Silly comment - 1/6/2010 5:46:31 PM   
antipode


Posts: 1787
Joined: 4/19/2004
Status: offline
quote:

I felt this was a flawed statement,


Her opinion is as valid as yours. Why someone else's opinion would irk you, that's the real question. You speak of respect, yet don't give it?

(in reply to Callisto643)
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RE: Silly comment - 1/6/2010 5:46:38 PM   
AquaticSub


Posts: 14867
Joined: 12/27/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Callisto643

I read somewhere that this submissive girl felt that dominant females are just alpha subs.  I felt this was a flawed statement, assuming that the female really isn't getting what she wanted, and I couldn't disagree more.  I believe dominant women are strong and know what they like and through this they find subs who complement their wants, thus creating two satisfied parties.  Any thoughts?  I don't know why, but this type of comment irks me.  Why be in the scene if you have no respect for the other players?


Sounds like someone who either is too immature to handle the fact that different people do things differently and therefore has to make explainations to why people people aren't behaving the way they think people should or it's someone who is attempting to force their kink and desires on the BDSM world at large.

As for not being in the scene... People are in this because they enjoy it. That doesn't mean everyone who enjoys it is going to be a respectful person. Same way not every person who enjoys cooking is someone you want to share a kitchen with.

< Message edited by AquaticSub -- 1/6/2010 5:47:14 PM >

_____________________________

Without my dominance you cannot submit. Without your submission I cannot dominate. You are my equal in this, though our roles are different.-Val

It was ok for him to beat me but then he tried to cuddle me! - Me

Member:Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair

(in reply to Callisto643)
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RE: Silly comment - 1/6/2010 6:21:23 PM   
vincentML


Posts: 9980
Joined: 10/31/2009
Status: offline 		The statement seems trivial without any rationale or defense.

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vML

Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter. ~ MLK Jr.

(in reply to Callisto643)
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RE: Silly comment - 1/6/2010 7:01:29 PM   
DomImus


Posts: 2004
Joined: 3/17/2009
Status: offline 		I tend to believe that a significant portion of straight male dominants are essentially service tops even though they would likely disagree and might even be irked by the assertion. It's just one person's opinion. Deal with it. You are irked by this other person's opinion. I am irked that you seem to have no respect for her right to have her opinion.

There. Now we're all suitably irked.




_____________________________

"Regret for the things we did can be tempered by time; it is regret for the things we did not do that is inconsolable." Sidney J. harris

(in reply to Callisto643)
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RE: Silly comment - 1/6/2010 7:11:53 PM   
khorne89


Posts: 4
Joined: 8/15/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Callisto643

I read somewhere that this submissive girl felt that dominant females are just alpha subs.  I felt this was a flawed statement, assuming that the female really isn't getting what she wanted, and I couldn't disagree more.  I believe dominant women are strong and know what they like and through this they find subs who complement their wants, thus creating two satisfied parties.  Any thoughts?  I don't know why, but this type of comment irks me.  Why be in the scene if you have no respect for the other players?


As shes just saying that she feels it is like that and not stating that its the true fact or that she thinks its like that, as she says its just a feeling. And its not a matter of respect for other players or not as shes just saying what her feeling is.
lets say shes been with a 100 self proclaimied dominant females and all of those acts more like her definition of alpha sub then its not so difficult to understand that she has a feeling thats what a dominant female is, she may think and know thats not what a dominant female is but she still has a feeling that it is. This is just one out of an endless other possible explanations for her feeling

Basicly a feeling is not a statment or even a representation of how a person thinks about something, its just that a feeling



(in reply to Callisto643)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: Silly comment - 1/6/2010 7:14:33 PM   
Darkfeather


Posts: 1142
Joined: 3/13/2007
Status: offline 		Ah, the label debate.  The only place I see more ferocious fighting over who is what title than in BDSM, is in alternative sexual relationships.  Maybe we should make licenced badges, certifying by a governing body, that person A is a dom person B is a switch, hehe.  Funny thing is for a fetish that is supposed to be very progressive and tollerant, some people come to blows over what category you fall in.  Perfect example is get together with a room full of kinksters and ask the definition of a switch.  Whoever you identify with should be a personal experience.  Some like to wear theirs on their sleeve so to speak, but for the most part, whoever we are is not something we can change.  Once we get over all this labeling stigma, people will probably get less irked about statements about overgeneralizations.

(in reply to vincentML)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: Silly comment - 1/6/2010 7:30:31 PM   
sweetsub1957


Posts: 2201
Joined: 4/28/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyAngelika


quote:

ORIGINAL: Jeffff

A Female Dominant is a woman who just hasn't met the right man yet.


Welcome to the boards!


Jeffwey


And a male dominant is just a man who hasn't felt the tip of my whip and my strap-on yet.

Bend over Jeffwey. Resistance is futile!

- LA

  



_____________________________

Member: Lance's Fag Hags.

"That's not just a chip on her shoulder, that's the whole potato!" ~Lady Angelika~

In lowering yourself to talking behind my back, you're perfectly positioned to kiss my ass.

An it harm none, do what ye wilt.

(in reply to LadyAngelika)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: Silly comment - 1/6/2010 8:06:06 PM   
Roselaure


Posts: 672
Joined: 4/12/2008
Status: offline 		Some opinions should be kept to oneself.  The world doesn't need to know every opinion I have.  I would imagine, in one's heart of hearts, everyone has an opinion or two that society at large would be aghast at.  

_____________________________

Once conform, once do what other people do because they do it, and lethargy steals over all the finer nerves and faculties of the soul.
-Virginia Woolf

(in reply to Callisto643)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: Silly comment - 1/6/2010 8:17:28 PM   
drtygrl


Posts: 29
Joined: 4/8/2008
Status: offline 		I would venture that this falls under the 'misogyny and bdsm thread'?
It's not only males that hold such an opinion...

(in reply to Callisto643)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: Silly comment - 1/6/2010 8:46:09 PM   
LadyOddsworth


Posts: 141
Joined: 1/2/2010
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Callisto643

I read somewhere that this submissive girl felt that dominant females are just alpha subs.  I felt this was a flawed statement, assuming that the female really isn't getting what she wanted, and I couldn't disagree more.  I believe dominant women are strong and know what they like and through this they find subs who complement their wants, thus creating two satisfied parties.  Any thoughts?  I don't know why, but this type of comment irks me.  Why be in the scene if you have no respect for the other players?


Maybe she was raised with a belief system that sees women as inferior. What's the old saying? Opinions are like assholes, everybody's got one. Watch her turn out to be a huge Domme someday...

_____________________________

We all have baggage, the question is; Is it carry on or do you need a U-haul for it?


(in reply to Callisto643)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: Silly comment - 1/7/2010 12:30:29 AM   
VaguelyCurious


Posts: 5264
Joined: 12/2/2009
From: United Kingdom
Status: offline 		The girl in question obviously hasn't come across some of the Ladies on these boards...

IMHO, though, it's misleading to talk about 'the scene' like you are expecting one big happy family of 'players': BDSM contains an enormous array of styles and dynamics, and they aren't all going to sit comfortably with each other.

Her opinion is just that: an opinion. If she thinks I'm just an alpha-sub that's fine; I'll be over here, thoroughly enjoying myself, should she ever change her mind...


_____________________________

Sthetic on FetLife.




(in reply to Callisto643)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: Silly comment - 1/7/2010 12:43:19 AM   
allthatjaz


Posts: 2878
Joined: 8/20/2008
Status: offline 		I think its likely that she likes to think that all women are the same. She probably thinks all vanilla people are secretly into this too.

Maria

_____________________________

S&M (Steve and Maria) persona libre de convencionalismos


Fan of edgeplay.co.uk

(in reply to VaguelyCurious)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: Silly comment - 1/7/2010 4:08:33 AM   
LadyPact


Posts: 32566
Status: offline 		I'm thinking that if you read it somewhere, it was most likely on the net.  

Kidding aside, it is just an opinion.  Granted, it's not based much in reality, and may be coming from someone who doesn't have a lot of knowledge about Dominant women, but that may change.  Over time, I've seen a lot of folks say things on the net that I've never had someone say to Me in person.  If they did, I'd probably just shrug My shoulders and chuckle a bit.


_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

(in reply to allthatjaz)
Profile   Post #: 20
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