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RE: The reason - 1/9/2010 12:06:45 PM

heartcream

Posts: 3044
Joined: 5/9/2007
From: Psychoalphadiscobetabioaquadoloop
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Sometimes apprehension and fear are signs that it is not a good fit and sometimes it is something that can evolve quite easily if the space is there for acceptance and understanding.

So called negative things can often be easily diffused and evolve if there is acceptance and compassion present. Ideally you show up as you are and that is complimentary to the other no matter what is in the mix.

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RE: The reason - 1/9/2010 1:22:40 PM

RealSub58

Posts: 1073
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Knighthunter862

Does a submissive or slave get what they need thru there submission or thru there Dom phraising and or rewarding them for thereact of submission?

This is a deep question, not to be lightly answered.
A sub or slave must ask themselves many questions before they submit, unless they are just doing the bottom thing -- totally different in my mind.

A sub or slave must ask themselves: what do I want, what do I need, what are my expectations and why do I choose this specific person to sumbit too.

I believe than answers to those questions will answer the motive and purpose behind submission.

The reason could lie in some selfish motive for self worth or some sort of gain they need to feel accomplishment.
The reason could be as selfless as fullfilling the pleasure of another.

When I am called to serve my Sir, I am performing a service out of devotion and dedication, out of strength and caring.
Expecting to be rewarded only if I have pleased him well is not on my agenda, but if it happens then my appreciation for him grows.

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RE: The reason - 1/9/2010 3:30:55 PM

wisdomtogive

Posts: 636
Joined: 11/13/2009
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Knighthunter862

Does a submissive or slave get what they need thru there submission or thru there Dom phraising and or rewarding them for thereact of submission?

I have been fortunate to learn to get what my needs are through my own submissive personality. There is a draw within me to seek more out of myself through discipline and, to use lally's word, inner dom. It directs and guides me in many ways like my late husband and the couple Doms in the past. From this i have learned the type of Dom i can serve best. I

am fortunate to have one now, who can take me and hold his hand out in ways that will help me grow and thrive as i completely submit to him. A part of it will be his use of words and his rewarding my submissiviness but just a part. He already is getting what he wants, and knows i am choosy and don't put up with a lot of domily characteristics that to me seem plastic. That though is another topic..sorry for getting off key here. Sir will encourage me by being one that i can truly respect in all he is and does.

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