RE: if a woman says she has X number of years experience

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LillyoftheVally -> RE: if a woman says she has X number of years experience (1/14/2010 10:08:52 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: osf as i said kink isn't that important an issue to me, if she is right for me she will learn my kink Ah sorry, I didn't realise that the thread was simply talking about what you see as important. I will add a disclaimer then, apart from osf the amount of experience someone has in activities can be significant, more that the dominant is experienced than the sub to be fair, I would not feel comfortable, for example, meeting someone who had never engaged in any bdsm activities and doing something like cutting or needles straight off, it would be a little too frightening for me. As to the second part of your comment, I think that is interesting, the learn your kink thing, do you mean learn how to do it? I am not really sure what you mean

osf -> RE: if a woman says she has X number of years experience (1/14/2010 10:09:24 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: AquaticSub quote: ORIGINAL: osf as a leader a dominant has to know what he is what he really wants and how to get it this takes a level of personal growth a submissive doesn't need to decide if he is the one she wants to follow snip that's my opinion and im sticking to it Realizing that one wants to follow in their relationship, who they trust to lead them, and how they want to be led requires a great deal of personal growth. I believe you are dismissing that which you don't personally relate to because it's not your side of the kneel. again we're speaking of different styles, i use what i seek as an example only

juliaoceania -> RE: if a woman says she has X number of years experience (1/14/2010 10:09:31 AM)
quote: the experience i speak of is his experience of himself, developing confidence etc Confidence does not take experience... these two things can be mutually exclusive

AquaticSub -> RE: if a woman says she has X number of years experience (1/14/2010 10:10:04 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: osf quote: ORIGINAL: AquaticSub quote: ORIGINAL: osf as a slave do give that much weight? i don't as she has no experience with me By that token, the dominant with ten years experience has no experience with me and doesn't know my buttons and how to manage me. On the whole though, I don't really care how long people have been around or how much experience they have or say they have. Someone can have tons of experience and still be a total twit that I wouldn't want to attach myself to. the experience i speak of is his experience of himself, developing confidence etc If it's developing confidence than it's simply no more important than the submissive's time developing her confidence to be able to say "Yes, I want to serve. I want to kneel. I will be proud of my collar and I will cherish his control over me".

osf -> RE: if a woman says she has X number of years experience (1/14/2010 10:11:39 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: LillyoftheVally quote: ORIGINAL: osf as i said kink isn't that important an issue to me, if she is right for me she will learn my kink Ah sorry, I didn't realise that the thread was simply talking about what you see as important. I will add a disclaimer then, apart from osf the amount of experience someone has in activities can be significant, more tat the dominant is experienced than the sub to be fair, I would not feel comfortable, for example, meeting someone who had never engaged in any bdsm activities and doing something like cutting or needles straight off, it would be a little too frightening for me. As to the second part of your comment, I think that is interesting, the learn your kink thing, do you mean learn how to do it? I am not really sure what you mean it wasn't meant that way but when i was asked what i meant i responded, nothing more quit asking about me and it will get back to others

AquaticSub -> RE: if a woman says she has X number of years experience (1/14/2010 10:14:10 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: osf quit asking about me and it will get back to others The responders shared their opinions, they didn't ask about yours. You made the thread about you.

RCdc -> RE: if a woman says she has X number of years experience (1/14/2010 10:15:43 AM)
Experience is irrelevant, regardless of whether male or female, dominant or slave. It is how the individual spirit handles experience. the.dark.

osf -> RE: if a woman says she has X number of years experience (1/14/2010 10:15:50 AM)
now i'll stop making it about me

LillyoftheVally -> RE: if a woman says she has X number of years experience (1/14/2010 10:17:15 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: AquaticSub quote: ORIGINAL: osf quit asking about me and it will get back to others The responders shared their opinions, they didn't ask about yours. You made the thread about you. Yeah, I am a little confused about the whole thing now to be honest. Osf, you asked a general question on a public board, I wasn't talking about you when I made my initial post. The only question I have asked you is in relation to what you mean by the submissive learning your kinks.

osf -> RE: if a woman says she has X number of years experience (1/14/2010 10:19:28 AM)
i want some one that will adopt mine as her own, it means nothing more than that

LillyoftheVally -> RE: if a woman says she has X number of years experience (1/14/2010 10:19:54 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Darcyandthedark Experience is irrelevant, regardless of whether male or female, dominant or slave. It is how the individual spirit handles experience. the.dark. And it is stuff like this that makes me love the.darkness so much, honestly such a wonderful way with words. And a very good point, people can experience things and learn nothing at all from it, a good example is unhealthy relationship cycles that so many of us get into, often we don't actually see what it is that we need to learn.

juliaoceania -> RE: if a woman says she has X number of years experience (1/14/2010 10:20:03 AM)
quote: lets change growth to ability Didn't you say this earlier? quote: the major difference between a sexual dominant as i like to label it and other men, are not the fantasies, all men have them, it's not even the creativity, to me it's the willingness to voice his desires and to persiver in getting her to fulfill them, and a biggie is feel good doing it and not feeling guilty after If it is about "ability", aren't we talking ability with "kink"? If not, what sort of ability does one need to tell someone to do something or other? Isn't easy just to bark out orders? That does not seem to take a huge amount of ability.

osf -> RE: if a woman says she has X number of years experience (1/14/2010 10:23:04 AM)
quote: If it is about "ability", aren't we talking ability with "kink"? If not, what sort of ability does one need to tell someone to do something or other? Isn't easy just to bark out orders? That does not seem to take a huge amount of ability. forget the kink and i don't even know how to begin explaining to you about the order barking thing

Domin8tingUrDrmz -> RE: if a woman says she has X number of years experience (1/14/2010 10:24:36 AM)
julia, You may have been being fecetious or sincere with your question "Isn't easy just to bark out orders?" But, I will disagree to some extent. While yes, anyone can say "Do that now!", not everyone can be convincing of those words. Ever hear someone try to bark an order and it comes out sounding like a question instead? lol So, it does take a bit of talent ;).

LillyoftheVally -> RE: if a woman says she has X number of years experience (1/14/2010 10:27:17 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Domin8tingUrDrmz julia, You may have been being fecetious or sincere with your question "Isn't easy just to bark out orders?" But, I will disagree to some extent. While yes, anyone can say "Do that now!", not everyone can be convincing of those words. Ever hear someone try to bark an order and it comes out sounding like a question instead? lol So, it does take a bit of talent ;). Well in line with how the thread is going, I think the point is that there wouldn't need to be convincing, because it is simple, a submissive just wants to obey, so a dominant just has to tell them what to do.

osf -> RE: if a woman says she has X number of years experience (1/14/2010 10:28:52 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Domin8tingUrDrmz julia, You may have been being fecetious or sincere with your question "Isn't easy just to bark out orders?" But, I will disagree to some extent. While yes, anyone can say "Do that now!", not everyone can be convincing of those words. Ever hear someone try to bark an order and it comes out sounding like a question instead? lol So, it does take a bit of talent ;). well said

Domin8tingUrDrmz -> RE: if a woman says she has X number of years experience (1/14/2010 10:29:06 AM)
Lilly, I totally agree with what you are saying, truly. That is why I only slightly disagreed and was mostly teasing.[;)] edited because I mistyped your name.

osf -> RE: if a woman says she has X number of years experience (1/14/2010 10:29:59 AM)
quote: Well in line with how the thread is going, I think the point is that there wouldn't need to be convincing, because it is simple, a submissive just wants to obey, so a dominant just has to tell them what to do if only it was always that easy lol quote: Well in line with how the thread is going, I think the point is that there wouldn't need to be convincing, because it is simple, a submissive just wants to obey, so a dominant just has to tell them what to do

LillyoftheVally -> RE: if a woman says she has X number of years experience (1/14/2010 10:30:35 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Domin8tingUrDrmz I totally agree with what you are saying, truly. That is why I only slightly disagreed and was mostly teasing.[;)] I know, I think however that it may need to be spelled out a bit for other readers [;)]

juliaoceania -> RE: if a woman says she has X number of years experience (1/14/2010 10:32:14 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: osf quote: If it is about "ability", aren't we talking ability with "kink"? If not, what sort of ability does one need to tell someone to do something or other? Isn't easy just to bark out orders? That does not seem to take a huge amount of ability. forget the kink and i don't even know how to begin explaining to you about the order barking thing Just like I do not know how to begin to explain the other side to you in a way that you will understand... my work here is done

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