RE: if a woman says she has X number of years experience

RE: if a woman says she has X number of years experience (Full Version)

All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> Ask a Master

Message

juliaoceania -> RE: if a woman says she has X number of years experience (1/14/2010 10:33:25 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Domin8tingUrDrmz julia, You may have been being fecetious or sincere with your question "Isn't easy just to bark out orders?" But, I will disagree to some extent. While yes, anyone can say "Do that now!", not everyone can be convincing of those words. Ever hear someone try to bark an order and it comes out sounding like a question instead? lol So, it does take a bit of talent ;). I enjoy that particular talent in the right man[;)]

osf -> RE: if a woman says she has X number of years experience (1/14/2010 10:34:53 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: juliaoceania quote: ORIGINAL: osf quote: If it is about "ability", aren't we talking ability with "kink"? If not, what sort of ability does one need to tell someone to do something or other? Isn't easy just to bark out orders? That does not seem to take a huge amount of ability. forget the kink and i don't even know how to begin explaining to you about the order barking thing Just like I do not know how to begin to explain the other side to you in a way that you will understand... my work here is done what we seem to have trouble with is explaining our personal wants/desires/thoughts to each other which doesn't invalidate either

Domin8tingUrDrmz -> RE: if a woman says she has X number of years experience (1/14/2010 10:38:37 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: osf quote: Well in line with how the thread is going, I think the point is that there wouldn't need to be convincing, because it is simple, a submissive just wants to obey, so a dominant just has to tell them what to do if only it was always that easy lol Osf, First of all, what I'm about to say is not intended to be snarky. So please, keep that in mind. It really IS that easy if in fact compatiblity is found. From what I've read of your posts (and I've read quite a few), you seem to think that since you are a Dominant, that you have the ability to MAKE any submissive woman follow your lead. That simply isn't the case as the lovely ladies of this forum have been attempting to inform you. There has to be compatiblity on key factors. In order for a submissive to WANT to obey your commands, or follow your lead, she has to TRUST that you have her best interest in mind. You come off sounding as if the only interest you have any concern about is your own. That may be why you don't find it so easy for someone to simply obey. edited because the quote feature is NOT my friend! [:-]

juliaoceania -> RE: if a woman says she has X number of years experience (1/14/2010 10:41:21 AM)
quote: what we seem to have trouble with is explaining our personal wants/desires/thoughts to each other which doesn't invalidate either I think it is completely valid that for you experience does not mean very much. For you the only thing that matters is a certain willingness to obey whatever it is you want your s-type to obey. For you it does not count for much where the submissive came upon this wherewithal to submit, it is only important that she can. It does not take much ability in your opinion to be able to overcome mental blocks to kneel for long periods of time. It does not take much ability to go outside of one's body and ignore the pain and the hurts inflicted on it that do not always feel good. It does not take much ability to overcome an inner voice that is conflicting with what another person is telling you to do... whether you trust that person or not. It does not take much ability in your mind to be able to humble yourself in tears because another person thinks you should. I know these things do not take much ability in your mind... but that does not mean that they do not. I have found in my submission a tremendous value in being able to go into that inner place of self determination and will power to follow what he said. That takes some sort of ability in my mind...

osf -> RE: if a woman says she has X number of years experience (1/14/2010 10:43:38 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Domin8tingUrDrmz quote: ORIGINAL: osf quote: Well in line with how the thread is going, I think the point is that there wouldn't need to be convincing, because it is simple, a submissive just wants to obey, so a dominant just has to tell them what to do if only it was always that easy lol quote: Osf, First of all, what I'm about to say is not intended to be snarky. So please, keep that in mind. It really IS that easy if in fact compatiblity is found. From what I've read of your posts (and I've read quite a few), you seem to think that since you are a Dominant, that you have the ability to MAKE any submissive woman follow your lead. That simply isn't the case as the lovely ladies of this forum have been attempting to inform you. There has to be compatiblity on key factors. In order for a submissive to WANT to obey your commands, or follow your lead, she has to TRUST that you have her best interest in mind. You come off sounding as if the only interest you have any concern about is your own. That may be why you don't find it so easy for someone to simply obey. i keep saying not any woman, there are very few women i would be compatible with very few i only know of less that a hand full of fingers on cm that interest me, is that few enough and yes compatability is paramount which is why in my profile and journal i go to great lengths to put across what i am and seek

Domin8tingUrDrmz -> RE: if a woman says she has X number of years experience (1/14/2010 10:47:40 AM)
You may do that in your profile (I don't know, I haven't bothered to look to be honest), but you do not come across that way on these forums. Any submissive men who are interested in me based upon my profile, I suggest they also read my forum posts to get a better picture of who I am based upon my interactions with others. If you were to make that suggestion to those who were interested in you based on your profile alone, you might see those numbers dwindle. I say that because the way you post here, you truly do come across in a negative manner to a plurality of readers.

osf -> RE: if a woman says she has X number of years experience (1/14/2010 10:49:28 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Domin8tingUrDrmz You may do that in your profile (I don't know, I haven't bothered to look to be honest), but you do not come across that way on these forums. Any submissive men who are interested in me based upon my profile, I suggest they also read my forum posts to get a better picture of who I am based upon my interactions with others. If you were to make that suggestion to those who were interested in you based on your profile alone, you might see those numbers dwindle. I say that because the way you post here, you truly do come across in a negative manner to a plurality of readers. didn't i just do that? and i have before i dont go into a long diatribe about it every post ok enough about me

LadyPact -> RE: if a woman says she has X number of years experience (1/14/2010 10:52:27 AM)
Fast reply after read through. Switch the genders. Yes, it does have a bearing to Me. There are many things that a submissive learns even before coming into My service which don't have to be specific to Me at all. There are only so many ways to tie a corset, care for leather, serve in a high protocol situation, etc, that are absolutely valuable to Me, even if they have never been involved with Me before. Having a basis of knowledge in a number of areas because they have prior experience saves Me the time of having to start at the basics. Of course, I still have to teach them the way I want things done, but it still a hell of a lot easier to do so if they have some prior experience. Same thing goes for the other side of the kneel, in My opinion. I tend to think that may have something to do with inexperienced Dominants that have the common complaint that a number of submissives out aren't open to entering dynamics with someone who hasn't successfully participated in one before.

Phoenixpower -> RE: if a woman says she has X number of years experience (1/14/2010 11:00:38 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: osf i think past experience carries more weight for the dominant than the submissive as the dominant has to develop personal growth ie they have to have figured out how it all works for them before they can control and lead another as a follower the submissive , i dont believe has to develop in the same way you dont need much experience to develop the desire to obey Gosh, that statement just shows that you still have a lot of learning to do [8\|] When you think it does not take any personal growth from a submissive or a slave to learn what she is looking for in a Master and to be able to differentiate between the arseholes and the respectable ones...you just make me laugh [:D] It was stated on one of the other threads...I think it was on the 2nd nonsense thread on the gorean forum, where it became apparent again how important it is to choose for the slave or submissive, WHO (s)he submittes to...as believe it or not there is a difference between a dom and an abuser and a difference in entering those relationships. Also at times the submissive or slave might not be able to put up with as much the Dom demands and so is better aware of what (s)he might go into, if (s)he submits... so if you think it is just plain follow the next fool...well, then good luck with the quality of your relationship.... last but not least the submissive/slave also has to develop the growth to live that lifestyle...as one respondent earlier mentioned she (I think it was female response) experienced a lot which made her what she is today...you have to be able to deal with it mentally...because if you can't then you can go downhill big time... so believe it or not...being a Dom or Master involves a bit more then just beating the shit out of someone, whilst it entails to be aware of the slaves or subs physical and emotional responds over time it also entails that the sub or slave is aware enough about how she is feeling and if it continues to be ok for her to go that path...just blindly and naively following a fool is not what being submissive or slave is about.

osf -> RE: if a woman says she has X number of years experience (1/14/2010 11:03:30 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Phoenixpower quote: ORIGINAL: osf i think past experience carries more weight for the dominant than the submissive as the dominant has to develop personal growth ie they have to have figured out how it all works for them before they can control and lead another as a follower the submissive , i dont believe has to develop in the same way you dont need much experience to develop the desire to obey Gosh, that statement just shows that you still have a lot of learning to do [8\|] When you think it does not take any personal growth from a submissive or a slave to learn what she is looking for in a Master and to be able to differentiate between the arseholes and the respectable ones...you just make me laugh [:D] It was stated on one of the other threads...I think it was on the 2nd nonsense thread on the gorean forum, where it became apparent again how important it is to choose for the slave or submissive, WHO (s)he submittes to...as believe it or not there is a difference between a dom and an abuser and a difference in entering those relationships. Also at times the submissive or slave might not be able to put up with as much the Dom demands and so is better aware of what (s)he might go into, if (s)he submits... so if you think it is just plain follow the next fool...well, then good luck with the quality of your relationship.... last but not least the submissive/slave also has to develop the growth to live that lifestyle...as one respondent earlier mentioned she (I think it was female response) experienced a lot which made her what she is today...you have to be able to deal with it mentally...because if you can't then you can go downhill big time... so believe it or not...being a Dom or Master involves a bit more then just beating the shit out of someone, whilst it entails to be aware of the slaves or subs physical and emotional responds over time it also entails that the sub or slave is aware enough about how she is feeling and if it continues to be ok for her to go that path...just blindly and naively following a fool is not what being submissive or slave is about. when you learn to read i'll respond to you i said enough about me ok all?

DomImus -> RE: if a woman says she has X number of years experience (1/14/2010 2:45:16 PM)
Experience is a double edged sword. Through experience one can make decisions about what direction they would like to go in all of this. Meeting someone who has already sorted much of that out can be a blessing. Experience also allows us to learn bad habits which are sometimes had to amend. The blank canvas can have as many pitfalls as the seasoned veteran - they're just a different set of potential pitfalls.

littlewonder -> RE: if a woman says she has X number of years experience (1/14/2010 2:46:23 PM)
I'm not a dom, not looking for a sub but in general I tend to not be interested in men who say they have experience because in reality, I could care less. I seek a dominant personality, not someone who has to learn it as he goes along or is talking about all his practice with sextoys and such. Any monkey can learn to swing a flogger.

KnightofMists -> RE: if a woman says she has X number of years experience (1/14/2010 3:05:08 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Phoenixpower When you think it does not take any personal growth from a submissive or a slave to learn what she is looking for in a Master and to be able to differentiate between the arseholes and the respectable ones...you just make me laugh [:D] I think it is pathentic... and either the height of arrogance or the pinnicle of stupidity for someone to actually believe such luncy. Everyone to some degree or another is going to go on a path of personal growth... Dominant or Submissive is rather irrelevent. No one can give any universal absolutes of what will or will not occur for one to engage into power dynamic relationships or even what they will need within those relationships. There is no map for all the submissives to follow or an instruction manual for the Dominant to live by. There is only ones own individual path of learning and the number of steps and what is learned is going to be rather unique from person to person.

osf -> RE: if a woman says she has X number of years experience (1/14/2010 3:10:57 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: KnightofMists quote: ORIGINAL: Phoenixpower When you think it does not take any personal growth from a submissive or a slave to learn what she is looking for in a Master and to be able to differentiate between the arseholes and the respectable ones...you just make me laugh [:D] I think it is pathentic... and either the height of arrogance or the pinnicle of stupidity for someone to actually believe such luncy. Everyone to some degree or another is going to go on a path of personal growth... Dominant or Submissive is rather irrelevent. No one can give any universal absolutes of what will or will not occur for one to engage into power dynamic relationships or even what they will need within those relationships. There is no map for all the submissives to follow or an instruction manual for the Dominant to live by. There is only ones own individual path of learning and the number of steps and what is learned is going to be rather unique from person to person. if people would read the actual words i used this argument goes away

KnightofMists -> RE: if a woman says she has X number of years experience (1/14/2010 3:13:52 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: osf if people would read the actual words i used this argument goes away and what profound words might those be?

osf -> RE: if a woman says she has X number of years experience (1/14/2010 3:19:34 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: KnightofMists quote: ORIGINAL: osf if people would read the actual words i used this argument goes away and what profound words might those be? i used the word more, not the word none i don't know but i see a big difference between more and none this is like the right wing talking heads, one will misquote someone and all the other right wing talking heads will run with it and say it' been reported what say we get off the subject of me

Phoenixpower -> RE: if a woman says she has X number of years experience (1/14/2010 3:23:50 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: osf quote: ORIGINAL: Phoenixpower quote: ORIGINAL: osf i think past experience carries more weight for the dominant than the submissive as the dominant has to develop personal growth ie they have to have figured out how it all works for them before they can control and lead another as a follower the submissive , i dont believe has to develop in the same way you dont need much experience to develop the desire to obey Gosh, that statement just shows that you still have a lot of learning to do [8\|] When you think it does not take any personal growth from a submissive or a slave to learn what she is looking for in a Master and to be able to differentiate between the arseholes and the respectable ones...you just make me laugh [:D] It was stated on one of the other threads...I think it was on the 2nd nonsense thread on the gorean forum, where it became apparent again how important it is to choose for the slave or submissive, WHO (s)he submittes to...as believe it or not there is a difference between a dom and an abuser and a difference in entering those relationships. Also at times the submissive or slave might not be able to put up with as much the Dom demands and so is better aware of what (s)he might go into, if (s)he submits... so if you think it is just plain follow the next fool...well, then good luck with the quality of your relationship.... last but not least the submissive/slave also has to develop the growth to live that lifestyle...as one respondent earlier mentioned she (I think it was female response) experienced a lot which made her what she is today...you have to be able to deal with it mentally...because if you can't then you can go downhill big time... so believe it or not...being a Dom or Master involves a bit more then just beating the shit out of someone, whilst it entails to be aware of the slaves or subs physical and emotional responds over time it also entails that the sub or slave is aware enough about how she is feeling and if it continues to be ok for her to go that path...just blindly and naively following a fool is not what being submissive or slave is about. when you learn to read i'll respond to you i said enough about me ok all? Indeed you said enough about yourself...so does that means you will stop now opening another 4000 threads [8\|] And my response was to what I citated from what you said...as quite frankly I don't have the time to read every single comment every time...so before you try to blame others it might help to get a grasp of the board yourself at first. [8\|]

osf -> RE: if a woman says she has X number of years experience (1/14/2010 3:25:40 PM)
if i do you can ignore them works both ways ok enough of me

KnightofMists -> RE: if a woman says she has X number of years experience (1/14/2010 3:31:19 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: osf quote: ORIGINAL: KnightofMists quote: ORIGINAL: osf if people would read the actual words i used this argument goes away and what profound words might those be? i used the word more, not the word none i don't know but i see a big difference between more and none this is like the right wing talking heads, one will misquote someone and all the other right wing talking heads will run with it and say it' been reported what say we get off the subject of me well there are words... but hardly profound... first... more or none... the difference is irrelevant unless you can quantify in some objective way how to measure "more" Fact is... you can't quantify it in any objective way. You or anyone can't know what personal experiences and growth a person may need to get to X whatever X is. But please... if you have some profound words to share that can make a difference please do....

osf -> RE: if a woman says she has X number of years experience (1/14/2010 3:38:46 PM)
quote: well there are words... but hardly profound... first... more or none... the difference is irrelevant unless you can quantify in some objective way how to measure "more" Fact is... you can't quantify it in any objective way. You or anyone can't know what personal experiences and growth a person may need to get to X whatever X is. But please... if you have some profound words to share that can make a difference please do.... would you really want to be graded on this argument in a course in logic? you don't like me ok, i don't give a damn so let it go

Page: << < prev 1 2 [3] 4 5 next > >>

Collarchat.com © 2025

Terms of Service

0.0625