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RE: When you are out with your partner - 1/24/2010 7:04:51 PM   
DrkJourney


Posts: 1917
Joined: 5/6/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Toppingfrmbottom

I'm kind of bossy, and my  now x's dad saw that and told joseph he needed to stop letting me boss him around so much lol.

He just said yes dad.
quote:

ORIGINAL: PrincessDonna

I think in public with a sub,people may take note that he does everything



see this is what I worry about when we are around family...lol   I usually tone it way down.  I know one time my mom said "you talk to him like he's some little child"...lol  

hard not to get caught on your own pitch fork...lol

_____________________________

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(in reply to Toppingfrmbottom)
Profile   Post #: 21
RE: When you are out with your partner - 1/24/2010 7:13:11 PM   
DrkJourney


Posts: 1917
Joined: 5/6/2007
Status: offline 		In answer to your question....we have rings that we were wear on our right hands middle finger.  They are bands, inside his it says "slave" inside mine "mistress".   Other than that instead of a leash in public I usually guide him around by the middle belt loop on the back of his pants.

If not around family and friends I can be a bit bossier because in the general public chances are I won't see those people again...lol  Other than him doing everything for me, which raises an eyebrow or two every now and then we pretty much just blend in. :>

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(in reply to ForeverOwned)
Profile   Post #: 22
RE: When you are out with your partner - 1/24/2010 10:01:29 PM   
AquaticSub


Posts: 14867
Joined: 12/27/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: ForeverOwned

is there something about him/her that let's people know that you belong to that person or do you go out of your way to just blend right in?


We don't particularly hide or announce our relationship. We are married and we wear our wedding bands. Before that we had matching rings for our left hand - mine broke but he still wears his. I wear his collar that doesn't look at all unusual and I frequently call him "Sir" in public - taking into consideration our surroundings. So far, no one has batted an eye.

It's very clear that we are in a relationship together. I don't really feel the need to spell out the specifics to random people at the mall.

_____________________________

Without my dominance you cannot submit. Without your submission I cannot dominate. You are my equal in this, though our roles are different.-Val

It was ok for him to beat me but then he tried to cuddle me! - Me

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(in reply to ForeverOwned)
Profile   Post #: 23
RE: When you are out with your partner - 1/25/2010 12:11:09 AM   
littlebitxxx


Posts: 732
Status: offline 		Even in vanilla couples, you can always tell when they "belong" to each other....by the holding hands, the looks, the way she'll tuck in behind him in a line-up, defer to him in a restaurant, etc.  Same same with M/s couples, in this one's opinion.  It doesn't need to be glaringly obvious for those watching to know that she "belongs" to Him.  Mind you, this one wears her collar everywhere, calls Him Master in public (or if little ears are around, maybe a Monsieur) and still does the little rituals insisted on like pouring His drink at the restaurant, etc.  Those watching may notice this, so be it.  Most people are so wrapped up in themselves they don't see past their own space anyway.   one would like to think that the couple at the next table are saying "Oh look honey, now that's a good woman taking care of her man.  Why can't you be more like that?"    lol

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It is the meaningless little acts that become meaningful in the doing.

The people that mind don't matter and the people that matter don't mind.

(in reply to AquaticSub)
Profile   Post #: 24
RE: When you are out with your partner - 1/25/2010 2:46:23 AM   
Mercnbeth


Posts: 11766
Status: offline 		since birth, this slave has been unable to blend in...maybe if she bought a better wig...

if you are the perceptive sort and you witness our interaction in public for, oh, let's say the duration of a meal in a restaurant...yes, it'll be SUPER obvious that He is controlling, protective and deferred to...and at the same time, passionate, fun and affectionate.

(in reply to ForeverOwned)
Profile   Post #: 25
RE: When you are out with your partner - 1/25/2010 3:38:38 AM   
ranja


Posts: 2111
Joined: 11/1/2007
Status: offline 		i think it is very obvious we are a couple when we are together, we walk hand in hand mostly because it feels nice, me slightly behind him which makes holding hands more comfortable cos if we walk level our wrists will be just slightly forced.
He has no qualms bossing me about or telling me off in public which i find very funny. He tells me things and i ask for things.

When He comes dancing with me it is also very obvious i am His as i will return to His table after every dance and He is not just a friend... people can tell the difference somehow.

When i am out and about by myself however i do not think people know by looking at me that i am married.


(in reply to ForeverOwned)
Profile   Post #: 26
RE: When you are out with your partner - 1/25/2010 4:53:13 AM   
eyesopened


Posts: 2798
Joined: 6/12/2006
From: Tampa, FL
Status: offline 		I think it's obvious that we are a couple just like any other.  We don't go out of our way to blend in.  We don't go out of our way to not blend in.  I wear a collar of silver barbed wire.  Whatever someone else might think of this, I wouldn't know as no one has ever made comment about it.  Someone might notice that I do everything for my Master.  People will most likely notice that we sit together in a restaurant, not across from each other.  People may or may not notice that I wait for Him to seat Himself before I sit.  Who knows what other people notice or don't.  Frankly, we tend to be in our own little world with little notice of other people or at least how other people may view us.

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Proudly owned by InkedMaster. He is the one i obey, serve, honor and love.

No one is honored for what they've received. Honor is the reward for what has been given.

(in reply to ForeverOwned)
Profile   Post #: 27
RE: When you are out with your partner - 1/25/2010 11:25:05 AM   
littleone35


Posts: 2828
Joined: 2/17/2005
Status: offline 		We blend in. I wear Masters collar but it looks like just a pretty necklace. We hold hands or he will put my hand in the crook of his elbow. I walk just slightly behind him because his legs are a lot longer then mine, and there is no reason for him to shorten his stride as long as i can keep up. So to look at us you would not know. We know and that is all that maters.

Matt's littleone

(in reply to eyesopened)
Profile   Post #: 28
RE: When you are out with your partner - 1/25/2010 12:29:51 PM   
GabrielleSlave


Posts: 616
Joined: 9/20/2007
From: in servitude
Status: offline 		It really depends on where Wwe are.... If Wwe are out at the pub He may absent mindedly put His arm round me and hold a handful of hair, but i am allowed to sit on a chair/sofa in that pub (unless at the munch lol!) and so it would not immediately obvious unless you were concentrating only on Uus and were into wiitwd....

At the supermarket, on the school run etc etc the only thing you would see, if Wwe were together for those things, is a couple who are clearly into eachother....equally!

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~ Host of the Rather Marvelous Greenwich Munch ~

"There is no such thing as liberty. You only change one sort of domination for another. All we can do is to choose our master."
D. H. Lawrence

(in reply to littleone35)
Profile   Post #: 29
RE: When you are out with your partner - 1/25/2010 3:00:09 PM   
janet2use


Posts: 6
Joined: 2/23/2007
Status: offline 		i wear a choker . Vanilla couples its a good chance they will not notice . But a BDSM couple or a Dom /Master that see us out will know .

(in reply to GabrielleSlave)
Profile   Post #: 30
RE: When you are out with your partner - 1/25/2010 3:24:37 PM   
Aileen1968


Posts: 6062
Joined: 12/12/2007
From: I miss Shore, New Jersey
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: ForeverOwned

is there something about him/her that let's people know that you belong to that person or do you go out of your way to just blend right in?


Heh. He likes to wear leather pants and a robe when he goes out. A crown too.
There's no doubting how domly he is.

_____________________________



(in reply to ForeverOwned)
Profile   Post #: 31
RE: When you are out with your partner - 1/25/2010 3:38:16 PM   
dragonseeker


Posts: 554
Status: offline 		I am always a half step behind him to the left, i basically bump into him if is stops too quickly, but hey that is where he wants me and i love it.... and he is usually holding my hand or guiding me in someway. If people don't see that i they would be have to be blind. To be any clearer then i might as well wear a sign saying "i belong to him===>"

_____________________________

slave kamile

signed, sealed, delivered... i'm owned

i reject your reality and substitute my own

(in reply to Aileen1968)
Profile   Post #: 32
RE: When you are out with your partner - 1/25/2010 3:58:05 PM   
mstrslve4fun


Posts: 60
Joined: 12/18/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: ForeverOwned

i honestly don't know how to reword it for you. Maybe someone can pitch in and help. Maybe if you read (if you haven;t already) some of the other repsonses that might help. This was not meant to be a negative thing.


There are the obvious things, like being led around on a leash in public. I think those examples are few and far between, and really depends on the community you live it. What might be acceptable in New York or Los Angeles or any other big metropolitan city might be frowned on by small town America.

I think it is only common courtesy to do what is appropriate for your particular area. Common sense rules in this case, I think.

But to answer your question, I wear my wedding ring, and generally cater to him when we are out, but I've always done that, even when we were vanilla. Nobody really notices.

(in reply to ForeverOwned)
Profile   Post #: 33
RE: When you are out with your partner - 1/25/2010 6:35:40 PM   
itsmeinLV


Posts: 207
Joined: 12/23/2009
Status: offline 		His attitude.  

(in reply to ForeverOwned)
Profile   Post #: 34
RE: When you are out with your partner - 1/25/2010 9:04:06 PM   
NuevaVida


Posts: 6707
Joined: 8/5/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: ForeverOwned

is there something about him/her that let's people know that you belong to that person or do you go out of your way to just blend right in?


It is doubtful anyone would notice anything like ownership with us and no, we do not go out of our way to blend in.    We do tone it down in some areas when he has his daughter, as she doesn't need to be involved in our relationship dynamic (she's a teen).  She did once say "Jeez, Dad it's like she's your slave or something" which we both had a private chuckle about.


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Live Simply. Love Generously. Care Deeply. Speak Kindly.



(in reply to ForeverOwned)
Profile   Post #: 35
RE: When you are out with your partner - 1/25/2010 11:08:15 PM   
peppermint


Posts: 5169
Joined: 10/18/2005
From: Montana
Status: offline 		We do not go out of our way to make people know we are a Dominant/submissive couple.  On the other hand, we do not go out of our way to hide the fact that we are a Dominant/submissive couple and with a need to blend in.  We see no need to make a show in either direction.  We act as we normally act when we are out alone or with friends, lifestyle or vanilla.  

(in reply to ForeverOwned)
Profile   Post #: 36
RE: When you are out with your partner - 1/26/2010 12:55:37 PM   
Toppingfrmbottom


Posts: 6528
Joined: 6/7/2009
Status: offline 		Yeah, it is. I remember one persons family from a thread on here a long time ago wanted to know why she waited hand and foot on her guy his legs are not broke can't he get it himself, and she just said I like waiting on him.

quote:

ORIGINAL: DrkJourney

see this is what I worry about when we are around family...lol   I usually tone it way down.  I know one time my mom said "you talk to him like he's some little child"...lol  

hard not to get caught on your own pitch fork...lol

(in reply to DrkJourney)
Profile   Post #: 37
RE: When you are out with your partner - 1/26/2010 12:59:25 PM   
Toppingfrmbottom


Posts: 6528
Joined: 6/7/2009
Status: offline 		I have never deferred to my partner in a restaurant. Nor do I tuck up behind him" in lines" in my opinion that does not equate being together though.
quote:

ORIGINAL: littlebitxxx

Even in vanilla couples, you can always tell when they "belong" to each other....by the holding hands, the looks, the way she'll tuck in behind him in a line-up, defer to him in a restaurant, etc.  Same same with M/s couples, in this one's opinion.


< Message edited by Toppingfrmbottom -- 1/26/2010 1:02:12 PM >

(in reply to littlebitxxx)
Profile   Post #: 38
RE: When you are out with your partner - 1/26/2010 1:12:20 PM   
slavekal


Posts: 1486
Joined: 7/20/2004
Status: offline 		There are times.  I have a heavy chain with an engraved lock around my neck.  And in summer, I pull the lady about in a rickshaw.  People enjoy the pageantry of it, but it isn't hard to figure out the subtext of it all.

_____________________________

"The Courage to Submit: the submissive male's guide to finding a dominant woman"
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(in reply to ForeverOwned)
Profile   Post #: 39
RE: When you are out with your partner - 2/6/2010 10:26:06 AM   
dolly1976


Posts: 10
Joined: 2/6/2010
Status: offline 		I wear my slave jewelery most places, ie collar, cuffs with finger rings and sometimes my nose-ear chain, its all heavy stainless steel, but fairly pretty and most people look but don't comment. I do cover up the back and sides of my collar with hair and clothing usually and long sleeves will reduce the impact on my wrist-finger chains but depends on the weather and my dress is feminine.

We hold hands and I think talk normally. He doesn't really feel comfortable being excessively dominant in public and generally respects me. We also work together so that sort of dictates alot of our relationship away from home.

 

(in reply to slavekal)
Profile   Post #: 40
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