Dastan
Posts: 148
Joined: 12/13/2008
From: Barranquilla city, Colombia
Status: offline
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quote:
ORIGINAL: DVsFox
quote:
ORIGINAL: Dastan
Hello...
I hope all male subs can relate to my words and my post. I really wanted to see what is the take of the outside world on the elements of manliness.
In my country, these are the definitions of what a man has to have as a skill/knowledge/experience to consider himself a person who can contribute to society, to be in the league or category of a real man, a responsible man able to do good.
However, there's a sense of perspective to be had. I heard a Domme say once "any man unable to fix something isn't really much of a man as he isn't of much usefulness" and I had the idea to ask other Subs what do they think that makes a Sub a manly man to be preferred by a Domme, other than play, for a relationship, whether it's a sentimental one or a frienship-and-play one.
Do you know how to Cook? how to hunt? how to fight? how to use a gun? ....have you had any survival/military training?
Also, do you know how to repair a car? a computer? electrical-electronical devices /connections? plumbing and masonry/bricklaying or walls?
Have you learned any musical or artistic skills ever, play an instrument, paint, sculpt, or anything else ?
I have always felt that there's sort of a checklist that says if you are qualifyed to take a position as a man who can take care of himself and others, who can be a protector as well as a provider. I also know that what we may perceive as manliness comes from an external image too, and an attitude, so i now want to ask about that...
¿ Do you consider yourself submissive to the degree of being passive, or are you a strong, tough guy who can look as macho as a Clint Eastwood on a cowboy movie shootout and make a stand even if your Domme dresses you up as a French maid and plugs your butt? Is your attitude Macho, Wimpy or Sissy (no offense to the sissies, I emant the negative way of that image, not your play scene which is perfectly nice) and how does that work for you? Do Dommes enjoy you that way or they prefer a masculine man as long as he's as docile as a carriage horse pulling his weight and taking the whip ?
I really want to know...
Do I know how to cook? A tad
Hunt? A little.
Fight:? Oh yes.
Use a gun? Definitely.
Can I repair a car? Beyond changing a tire, no.
Do I have any artistic skills? I'm a poet and a bit of a writer.
I don't think these traits make me any more or less "manly" than I already am, really.
DV's Fox
I will go ahead and use your reply, if I may, as a good example of a person who replied to my post understanding the full sense of the idea I explained....
You are undoubtedly a man, not a mere boy who can't take care of some basic skills. I consider, and in my country, it's very important, that a man has some abilities, skills, to be considered a person able to pull hiw own weight and help the people he loves carry their burden. It's a matter of capabilities, of simple power, in its material form and concretion....
Now, you can take 100 guys who are good-hearted, kind, gentle, honorable, responsible, honest, and can consider themselves able to stand for something, in front, for and against it, even if they do stand alone. I don't question these virtues, but I start my topic imagining that it is implied the person I talk about has those already covered, and now we move on to the next items of the checklist.
Now, your skills do not make you less or more manly than anyone else? Perhaps, I agree that a person isn't manly or not for some reasons, although there are some guys out there who lack some skills to have a better attitude at life and they are girly, wimpy and definetly, sissy, not exactly the ephitome of the definition of man or manliness.
But the fact is...even if "just a little", you can hunt, cook and handle a gun, fight and that helps you define yourself as a person able to take care of your needs if need be and also help other person cover theirs. You can only change the tire on your car...well, if you are like me, with a simple manual, you can do a lot to it except inner motor repair and specialized electrical/circuit fixes. And I draw and well, I danced and did gymnastics and I don't think it made me sissy or anything, and I did start to learn violin and flute when I was younger and well, I don't consider msyelf better than anyone else. I guess it is simply a trait that shows I have been able to explore my potential more than other who preferred to read a lot of comics and watch a lot of tv.
My take on these lements is that they give me experience, and perspective to appreciate some things in life as well as allow me to get some of those things for me and the ones I love. God forbid, our war spins out of control and we must flee across a jungle, myself and my loved ones ain't going hungry, even if I can't be compared to a pro hunter or an aborigin, I'll make sure they have 1 good meal with plenty of meat at the table per day, and I will be able to cook it past the "meat on a stick" recipe of all hunters.
I consider that makes me a capable man who can stand against such odds without flinching and not die trying. I consider that a guy who can't have the same skills, as good a person as he is, is a boy who like any child, becomes someone else's charge and duty, if not a burden considering his place, and role, is to be the one fixing problems, not asking for help to do so. yet i don't think it makes him less manly, or a bad person, just an incomplete one, not by fault but maybe by choice because he didn't go the extra mile exploring what he could have been. And that is simple negligent and mediocre lack of ambition and personal drive.
I don't expect all men to go to the army for a couple years, sign up at the dojo in their town and start going to the woods without food and water to test their skills and rank themselves in a scale, but I do thinkt hat a real man has to know that when it's all said and done, he can talk the talk ad walk the walk even if he just imitates what he saw on a survival show on Discovery or NatGeo.
Maybe it's a cultural macho image of a man, which is nowadays revisited and adds sensibility, comprehension, understanding, tolerance and emotionality to the rough and tough side of fixing, coocking, hunting and fighting things and being able to be thrown into a desert island and survive for a long time. But I guess that being a man is exactly based on the fact that evolution and history do show that the traits i exposed are the ones which define the most capable of us to don the title.
No that we've defined that, I wonder, to reroute the forum back to its track....what are the elements that allow a man to stand in front of the mirror and feel proud, complete in his skills and capabilities ?
< Message edited by Dastan -- 1/27/2010 7:34:45 AM >
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Power without Purpose is the same as an Artist without a Brush
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Elements of Manliness: How good you have to become to b... - 
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