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punishment - 1/27/2010 8:47:23 PM

annasub88

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have u ever had a dom master tell u ur receiving a punishment like for example 4 swats then end up subtracting them for good behavior like following an order

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RE: punishment - 1/27/2010 8:49:30 PM

DarkSteven

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If he wants to do it, then he can.

Are you objecting to him subtracting from the swats?

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RE: punishment - 1/27/2010 8:50:28 PM

annasub88

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no iv just never heard of it before

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RE: punishment - 1/27/2010 8:57:47 PM

afkarr

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What is the fascination with the punishment concept around here? Honestly, the only people who can determine the dynamics of any relationship ae the people directly invovled. The whens/wheres/hows/whys/and even the ifs of the punishment topic are best left to and defined by the people directly affected by it.

If the Dom and the sub can't figure those things out by themselves, maybe they shouldn't be playing grown up.

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RE: punishment - 1/27/2010 8:58:57 PM

annasub88

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good point

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RE: punishment - 1/27/2010 9:03:49 PM

littlewonder

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no he never has but if he wanted to then that's his choice.

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RE: punishment - 1/28/2010 1:39:16 AM

Focus50

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From: Newcastle, Australia
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quote:

ORIGINAL: annasub88

have u ever had a dom master tell u ur receiving a punishment like for example 4 swats then end up subtracting them for good behavior like following an order

What you're calling "punishment" here sounds more like erotic play with a discipline element.

When I punish my girl, it's because she's done something to make me *angry* and for that, the punishment is the withdrawal of my attention. She does "alone time" in the corner. "Swats" or other corporal punishments still constitute attention in my book, so they're out...!

Not meaning to be overly picky of your example but following an order does not qualify as good behaviour per se' so much as what's generally expected of her. But ok, not following an order will likely get her disciplined (such as a "swat").

I'll add that a bit of playful cheek/spirit/attitude/brattiness etc is unlikely to actually anger me so is not punishable but there'll likely come a point where I grab a pinch of her short n curlies and haul her up on her toes so we're nose to nose as I enquire about the continuation of her current behaviour. I can be "playful", too...! ;-)

Focus.

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RE: punishment - 1/28/2010 1:46:59 AM

WyldHrt

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quote:

What you're calling "punishment" here sounds more like erotic play with a discipline element.

That would be "funishment" in CMspeak

quote:

I'll add that a bit of playful cheek/spirit/attitude/brattiness etc is unlikely to actually anger me so is not punishable but there'll likely come a point where I grab a pinch of her short n curlies and haul her up on her toes so we're nose to nose as I enquire about the continuation of her current behaviour. I can be "playful", too...! ;-)

OK, that was just... hawt!

*makes note- Focus' girls get to keep their "short and curlies"*

< Message edited by WyldHrt -- 1/28/2010 1:47:35 AM >

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RE: punishment - 1/28/2010 2:58:10 AM

Focus50

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quote:

ORIGINAL: WyldHrt

quote:

I'll add that a bit of playful cheek/spirit/attitude/brattiness etc is unlikely to actually anger me so is not punishable but there'll likely come a point where I grab a pinch of her short n curlies and haul her up on her toes so we're nose to nose as I enquire about the continuation of her current behaviour. I can be "playful", too...! ;-)

OK, that was just... hawt!
*makes note- Focus' girls get to keep their "short and curlies"*

<whispering> Focus thinks that visually, the absolutely most sexiest part of the female form is a neatly trimmed "landing strip" down below.... Trimmed = enough to double as a "lifting handle" for the making of points. ;-)

Focus.

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RE: punishment - 1/28/2010 3:04:22 AM

wandersalone

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Focus50
<whispering> Focus thinks that visually, the absolutely most sexiest part of the female form is a neatly trimmed "landing strip" down below.... Trimmed = enough to double as a "lifting handle" for the making of points. ;-)

Focus.

Is there a smiley face thing for crossing legs....ouch

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RE: punishment - 1/28/2010 5:36:30 AM

DesFIP

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Not to derail the subject of how hawt Focus is, but I hate rewards. I like him doing things for me because he feels like it, but the whole punishment and reward thing is a major turn off to me. Like being a kid in school, do bad and you get check marks next to your name, do well and you get a gold star. What am I, a third grader?

But I would feel confused if he announced he was going to do something and then did something else. And if I had to redeem myself by him giving me an assignment that he otherwise wouldn't, I might just take the original punishment. I get the feeling that the new assignment meant to be able to redeem myself would be one he had agreed not to do. But he gets to break limits because it's punishment? No thanks. That's contemptible.

However if the op is saying that should she change her attitude and show she's behaving, then he no longer feels it is necessary to punish her that makes sense. Because the point here is that her attitude has changed, the point shouldn't be to hit her. When the point is the spanking, that's for fun. When the point is behavior, that's discipline.

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RE: punishment - 1/28/2010 11:02:32 AM

jstkrs

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quote:

ORIGINAL: annasub88

have u ever had a dom master tell u ur receiving a punishment like for example 4 swats then end up subtracting them for good behavior like following an order

If I am in need of discipline, I have done something wrong.
Good behavior after the fact does not change that I did wrong.
Good behavior is NOT atoning for bad, but is the result of lessons learned.
Without discipline, I don't feel forgiven. If he did not give me the promised discipline I would either a)believe that my wrong was so severe to do irreparable harm to our relationship or b)I would see as a miscarriage of his responsibilities.

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RE: punishment - 1/28/2010 11:15:02 AM

jstkrs

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quote:

When the point is the spanking, that's for fun. When the point is behavior, that's discipline.

Good point.
So maybe the poster is asking if she shouldn't behave so she gets the 'swats'????LOL Nah, I don't think that's what she meant.

< Message edited by jstkrs -- 1/28/2010 11:16:34 AM >

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RE: punishment - 1/28/2010 11:39:09 AM

annasub88

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no i think i should get them when he takes them away i feel like im getting away with something i was just curious as to what anyone else thought

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RE: punishment - 1/28/2010 11:45:24 AM

UniqueRaven

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From: Austin, TX
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quote:

ORIGINAL: annasub88

no i think i should get them when he takes them away i feel like im getting away with something i was just curious as to what anyone else thought

Going with this, i do understand what you're saying. i have had in the past where my Master changed his mind about punishing me for something i thought i should be punished for (and yes, real punishment, not "fun" punishment) and then i felt bad because i thought i got away with something.

i had to make the mental and emotional move that his decisions are his decisions, and if he decides to not punish me for something then i just need to get over it and move on. It isn't my place to decide whether i really deserved it or not - he makes that decision, not me. If he takes a punishment away, move on, be happy, and continue with life.

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RE: punishment - 1/28/2010 11:47:21 AM

jstkrs

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quote:

ORIGINAL: annasub88

no i think i should get them when he takes them away i feel like im getting away with something i was just curious as to what anyone else thought

ahhh...I see. That's the type of thing that can undermine the whole dynamic. Best thing to do in this case(or in any case) is to tell him how you feel about it. Nothing makes me feel less submissive than if I feel like I'm getting away with something.

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RE: punishment - 1/28/2010 11:52:54 AM

DesFIP

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As Raven said, it's his decision when to punish or how much.
But if in fact he finds he doesn't need to punich, but just to a reminder of what will happen if she doesn't behave, then that's enough. He's getting what he wants, which is her to change her behavior.

If she isn't getting what she wants, she needs to talk to him about it.

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RE: punishment - 1/28/2010 11:53:01 AM

annasub88

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yeah thats the hard part lol

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RE: punishment - 1/28/2010 8:49:07 PM

MasterSlaveLA

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quote:

ORIGINAL: annasub88

have u ever had a dom master tell u ur receiving a punishment like for example 4 swats then end up subtracting them for good behavior like following an order

Wait... just FOUR swats? Crap... you get off EASY!!! Wussy!!!

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RE: punishment - 1/29/2010 4:03:28 AM

mastersslut69

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When my master makes a decision to punish me I know that I will receive that punishment and good behaviour won't take the punishment away. If it did I would know that I could manipulate him and twist him around my finger so although I try, he won't skip my discipline and this is good for me. My Master doesn't always deliver the punishment immediately, instead he chooses the time which makes me think longer about the error of my ways.... Waiting and knowing I've displeased him is harsher than my punishment sometimes.

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