Collarspace Discussion Forums


Home  Login  Search 

Question for Bi-Dommes


View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest
 
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> Ask a Mistress >> Question for Bi-Dommes Page: [1] 2   next >   >>
Login
Message << Older Topic   Newer Topic >>
Question for Bi-Dommes - 2/3/2010 7:56:50 PM   
sweetboundesire


Posts: 285
Joined: 10/29/2009
Status: offline 		i would've just made a poll but i do not see a choice for doing so....

All i really wanted to ask is, if, as a bi-sexual Domme, are you submissive to men or Dominant to both men and women?

Or maybe you are a switch...if so, how does that work for you? Did one aspect of you come first then the second was realized?

If you are submissive to a Dominant male....do you have one in your life?

Just curious...I have always felt submissive to men yet I am in no way submissive to women.
Curious if there are Ladies out there like this....that visit CM anyway...

thanks for taking the time to respond..

_____________________________

and every broken line seems to have a particular design~
and the universe can only expand.
gotta pocket full of dreams and cash in my hand.
and i know, money ain't real...
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: Question for Bi-Dommes - 2/3/2010 8:22:06 PM   
Domin8tingUrDrmz


Posts: 1269
Joined: 4/8/2006
From: Portland Metro, Oregon
Status: offline 		There are indeed women like this and some of them do frequent CM. I can't help you much, because I'm not bisexual and I'm not submissive. However, I've seen a few women here who submit to a man and dominate a woman. Sadly, I can't think of any names at the moment.

Rest assured, you are not alone in your desires.

_____________________________

4 out of 3 people have trouble with fractions.

Ask a Mistress Forum FAQ
Profile Help

(in reply to sweetboundesire)
Profile   Post #: 2
RE: Question for Bi-Dommes - 2/3/2010 8:43:05 PM   
VampiresLair


Posts: 1307
Joined: 9/3/2008
Status: offline 		I am a bi domme who has been dominant to both men and women. I have a slave husband, so I am only actively dominating one person right now, but in my past I have controlled both. I have never been submissive to either gender.

DV


_____________________________

Separately we are DiurnalVampire and DVsFox

10/18 Wedding date. 1 year and still blissfully happy

10/13/10 3 year anniversary of his becoming my Fox

Talk impolitely to me, baby - Thanks sunshinemiss



(in reply to Domin8tingUrDrmz)
Profile   Post #: 3
RE: Question for Bi-Dommes - 2/3/2010 8:45:07 PM   
SylvereApLeanan


Posts: 8275
Joined: 11/1/2007
From: Hell
Status: offline 		Hmmm...
 
Bisexual, check.
Domme, check.
 
I guess I qualify, so here goes. 
 
I do not submit.  Ever.  To anyone.  I'm married to a dominant man but I'm still the top dominant in the household.  If I were ever to consider switching, it would be for him, but I don't submit.  Ever.  To anyone.

_____________________________

Sylverë
Dark Muse
30 Fluffy Points
Grumpy Cat is my spirit animal.
Shadow Governess & Mean Girl
"There's something that doesn't make sense. Let's go and poke it with a stick."— The Doctor

(in reply to Domin8tingUrDrmz)
Profile   Post #: 4
RE: Question for Bi-Dommes - 2/3/2010 10:24:53 PM   
LadyAngelika


Posts: 8070
Joined: 7/4/2004
Status: offline
quote:

Dominant to both men and women


Definitely dominant.

I dominate mostly men, and occasionally women.

In the past (5 yrs +) I've attempted submission but I always felt like I was totally faking it. I did a lot of topping from the bottom too.

I am however an S&M switch though I have not played bottom/maso with a Sadist in years. I just haven't felt the desire to, but if I did, I would know who to go see. He knows how to top me as a Sadist without trying to demand any kind of submission from me.

- LA

< Message edited by LadyAngelika -- 2/3/2010 10:25:58 PM >

_____________________________

Une main de fer dans un gant de velours ~ An iron hand in a velvet glove

(in reply to sweetboundesire)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: Question for Bi-Dommes - 2/4/2010 4:06:50 AM   
Alecta


Posts: 1355
Joined: 1/19/2010
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: sweetboundesire


All i really wanted to ask is, if, as a bi-sexual Domme, are you submissive to men or Dominant to both men and women?

Hmmm... don't get why, without being a switch, a Domme would be submissive to a man.
I don't think I could actually be dominant (or submissive) to another woman, I'm bisexual, but I 'only' have 'normal' sex with them.

quote:

ORIGINAL: sweetboundesire
Or maybe you are a switch...if so, how does that work for you? Did one aspect of you come first then the second was realized?

Yep, I am a switch. I started out as a submissive (if that's what you mean) to men and am now both dominant and submissive to men, all depends on the person and on the relationship.

quote:

ORIGINAL: sweetboundesire
If you are submissive to a Dominant male....do you have one in your life?

The occasional play-partner, not more at the moment.




(in reply to sweetboundesire)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: Question for Bi-Dommes - 2/4/2010 4:16:51 AM   
SweetDommes


Posts: 3313
Joined: 10/5/2004
Status: offline 		As Alecta said - by definition, if they are Dominant to some and submissive to others, then they are switches, not Dommes (calls to mind a discussion I had with a guy who claimed that "Dommes make the best submissives" *gigglesnort* yeah, right ...). I identify on the site as a Domme, although I admit that I'm actually a switch. I lable myself on the site as "Domme" because it makes life easier if guys don't even consider that I might switch with them. I am submissive to Holly and Holly alone - no one else.

_____________________________

Miss Karen and Miss Holly

Earth is the insane asylum for the universe.

Friends are God's apology for relatives

(in reply to Alecta)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: Question for Bi-Dommes - 2/4/2010 6:53:00 AM   
MistressTonya2u


Posts: 140
Joined: 12/20/2009
Status: offline 		I am a bisexual Domme.
I dominate both men and women, and I do not submit or switch to either.

(in reply to SweetDommes)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: Question for Bi-Dommes - 2/4/2010 7:40:04 AM   
DianeB269


Posts: 1596
Joined: 10/30/2006
Status: offline 		I'm bi and I do not submit....My male sub will switch when we are playing with a female sub...


Diane

(in reply to sweetboundesire)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: Question for Bi-Dommes - 2/4/2010 7:46:34 AM   
allthatjaz


Posts: 2878
Joined: 8/20/2008
Status: offline 		I switch to my partner but I do not submit. I don't consider I have any submission in me.

I am primarily dominant and I am bi. We (that is my partner and me) have a submissive female.
I am more inclined to dominate a female than I am a male because I enjoy the sexual route and I don't do sex with other men.
I would never switch with another woman never mind submit. If a woman tried to dominate me I would have to kill her

_____________________________

S&M (Steve and Maria) persona libre de convencionalismos


Fan of edgeplay.co.uk

(in reply to SylvereApLeanan)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: Question for Bi-Dommes - 2/4/2010 7:52:36 AM   
LaTigresse


Posts: 26123
Joined: 1/15/2006
Status: offline 		Technically (per the gold star lesbian patrol) I am bi, even though I definitely prefer women sexually.

I just cannot imagine submitting to anyone, let alone a male. It's just not in me. Even 25 years ago when I was an insecure twit, I was still a nasty insecure twit when things didn't go my way. And even today, lord help you if you try to 'make me' do anything.

I have never had any interest in being sexually dominant with a male. Yes I want them to do what I want, to do things for me, etc etc.....but I don't want to see their hairy ass or their dick while they are doing it. If I were to have any awareness they were getting a sexual thrill out of it, I would be squicked. That's just me and my own weirdness. I guess I love the thrill of the power over a man but it's not a sexual thrill. Just a power trip. With a woman I connect with, it's so much more.


_____________________________

My twisted, self deprecating, sense of humour, finds alot to laugh about, in your lack of one!

Just because you are well educated, articulate, and can use big, fancy words, properly........does not mean you are right!

(in reply to sweetboundesire)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: Question for Bi-Dommes - 2/4/2010 8:09:27 AM   
Jeffff


Posts: 12600
Joined: 7/7/2007
Status: offline 		Sighsssssssssssss

_____________________________

"If you don't live it, it won't come out your horn." Charlie Parker

(in reply to LaTigresse)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: Question for Bi-Dommes - 2/4/2010 8:15:08 AM   
atypicalsub


Posts: 284
Joined: 4/11/2008
From: an atypical sub
Status: offline 		My Mistress is also one of the technically bi Dommes; 99% lesbian I just happen to be one of the very rare exceptions.  She loves to dominate men but does not have sex with them.  She also dominates women and that can be either just kink play or it can also be sexual all depending on the other woman.  We are working to build a poly household and it has been clear from the very begining that *any* female will outrank *all* males and ultimately Mistress will be queen of the hive.



_____________________________

Polyamorous, solitary eclectic pagan, pansexual slut, and personal pet of MistressYes

"Do not do anything you are ashamed of, and don't be ashamed of anything you do"
(although I'm sure my bio-family wishes I did less and was ashamed of more)


(in reply to sweetboundesire)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: Question for Bi-Dommes - 2/4/2010 8:28:10 AM   
sweetboundesire


Posts: 285
Joined: 10/29/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: allthatjaz
I would never switch with another woman never mind submit. If a woman tried to dominate me I would have to kill her



lol, i always considered being a switch something confusing to be but perhaps that's what I am. I've never submitted to a women and only since my divorce really started to have relationships with other females. So it's something I'm learning about myself more yet in hindsight on my life, makes perfect sense. One girlfriend in particular, I would always but heads with, she would try to dominate and control me and it ended up turning me off completely. I like submissive women yet submissive men turn me off. I prefer a Dominant man.

_____________________________

and every broken line seems to have a particular design~
and the universe can only expand.
gotta pocket full of dreams and cash in my hand.
and i know, money ain't real...

(in reply to allthatjaz)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: Question for Bi-Dommes - 2/4/2010 9:19:34 AM   
thetammyjo


Posts: 6322
Joined: 9/8/2005
Status: offline 		I don't consider myself a domme because I don't consider that a real word or a terribly useful word.

I am dominant, period, sometimes a loner, and when necessary I can follow but only if necessary and frankly I'm going to call the "leader" on things.

In terms of BDSM, I'm also a top, a sadist or a dominant. I've had male and female partners but I don't normally think of myself as bisexual because my principle sexual orientation is dominant sadist and the sex of my partner doesn't really matter. Their gender matter because I can't really tolerate solidly "masculine" or "feminine" gender attributes, behavior and personalities.

How's that for confusing it all?

_____________________________

Love, Peace, Hugs, Kisses, Whips & Chains,

TammyJo

Check out my website at http://www.thetammyjo.com Or www.tammyjoeckhart.com

And my LJ where I post fiction in progress if you "friend" me at http://thetammyjo.livejournal.com/

(in reply to sweetboundesire)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: Question for Bi-Dommes - 2/4/2010 9:38:48 AM   
atypicalsub


Posts: 284
Joined: 4/11/2008
From: an atypical sub
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: thetammyjo

In terms of BDSM, I'm also a top, a sadist or a dominant. I've had male and female partners but I don't normally think of myself as bisexual because my principle sexual orientation is dominant sadist and the sex of my partner doesn't really matter. Their gender matter because I can't really tolerate solidly "masculine" or "feminine" gender attributes, behavior and personalities.

How's that for confusing it all?


I do get what you mean.  I consider it somewhat misleading to list myself as male but the choices are so limited.  While I was born with a penis my Mistress will tell you that most of my mannerism are very feminine.  Another site included "gender-flex" as an option and that seem much closer for me.



_____________________________

Polyamorous, solitary eclectic pagan, pansexual slut, and personal pet of MistressYes

"Do not do anything you are ashamed of, and don't be ashamed of anything you do"
(although I'm sure my bio-family wishes I did less and was ashamed of more)


(in reply to thetammyjo)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: Question for Bi-Dommes - 2/4/2010 9:56:51 AM   
RumpusParable


Posts: 1923
Joined: 7/7/2005
From: NYC now!
Status: offline 		I'm dominant towards males and females, both, too.  The only time I sub is with my spouse once in a great while for a change of pace, otherwise I'm in control of our relationship... and even the submitting is on my terms, I tell him when I want to and where.

_____________________________

Relationships come and go, but plastination is forever.

I generally use fast-reply. If directing my post at someone specific I will indicate so.

Minimal summary: Artist, Disabled Veteran, Vegan, Pornographer, and Agender dominant female.

(in reply to atypicalsub)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: Question for Bi-Dommes - 2/4/2010 10:38:41 AM   
GloriousMorning


Posts: 171
Joined: 3/18/2009
Status: offline 		As I bisexual Dominant, I feel most comfortable being dominant with both sexes. For sensation and excitement, I have bottomed on occasion to very capable male friends, but I'm not interested in submitting to anyone. I did let my former submissive top me a few times and it was very exciting, but I didn't feel like I "submitted" or that I didn't have the same amount of control and power as I always had.

(in reply to RumpusParable)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: Question for Bi-Dommes - 2/4/2010 12:07:53 PM   
sweetboundesire


Posts: 285
Joined: 10/29/2009
Status: offline 		so is a Domme who submits to a man but not a woman a bi-switch and not a Domme at all?
or is she a Bi-switch-Domme?
that is if she chooses to be a Domme only to women
lol

curious.

< Message edited by sweetboundesire -- 2/4/2010 12:08:23 PM >

_____________________________

and every broken line seems to have a particular design~
and the universe can only expand.
gotta pocket full of dreams and cash in my hand.
and i know, money ain't real...

(in reply to GloriousMorning)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: Question for Bi-Dommes - 2/4/2010 12:59:57 PM   
LaTigresse


Posts: 26123
Joined: 1/15/2006
Status: offline 		She is whatever she thinks she is..........as long as you are not in a relationship with her..........it doesn't matter.

_____________________________

My twisted, self deprecating, sense of humour, finds alot to laugh about, in your lack of one!

Just because you are well educated, articulate, and can use big, fancy words, properly........does not mean you are right!

(in reply to sweetboundesire)
Profile   Post #: 20
Page:   [1] 2   next >   >>
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> Ask a Mistress >> Question for Bi-Dommes Page: [1] 2   next >   >>
Jump to:





New Messages No New Messages
Hot Topic w/ New Messages Hot Topic w/o New Messages
Locked w/ New Messages Locked w/o New Messages
 Post New Thread
 Reply to Message
 Post New Poll
 Submit Vote
 Delete My Own Post
 Delete My Own Thread
 Rate Posts




Collarchat.com © 2025
Terms of Service Privacy Policy Spam Policy

0.093