sexyred1 -> RE: I need ideas to become a better sub (2/14/2010 5:41:55 PM)
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quote:
ORIGINAL: dreamerdreaming quote:
ORIGINAL: Johmey As a Dominant, I know you know what you like best of your slave/sub! Please do share what you like most out of your toy(s) :) <snip> What makes a great slave???????? 1.) Willing obedience. 2.) I gave you my best answer in your last thread, in the parting thoughts section of my post here: http://www.collarchat.com/m_3057699/mpage_2/key_/tm.htm#3065222 Johmey, being a good submissive or slave is about being a good partner. Just like in a vanilla relationship. Find someone with whom you are compatible in and out of the bedroom, whose needs and desires fit well with yours. My advice in the thread I linked to above is much more about the big things, than the little things. I could give a shit if you can give a good massage, or if you're a good cook. I'm not saying those might not be big things to another dom, but those are skills that you can learn relatively easily, compared to the things I'm interested in: Are your finances in order? Are you well educated? Are you compassionate? Do you have good control over your thoughts, emotions and actions? How are your communication skills? Are you able to form, and nurture trusting relationships? Are you honorable and trustworthy? How do you handle difficulties and challenges, in your life? What are your short, mid-range, and long-term goals for your career, your education, your primary relationship, your finances, and your life? What is your plan, for achieving them? Those are the big things, for me. Fuck the little things. Anyone can learn how to make my tea, in a jiffy. Pay attention to the important things, and don't sweat the small stuff. Work on the things that are important to you, and when you find the domme who fits well with you regarding those, you can turn your attention to how she likes the little things done. Perfect post. I agree with every word. Too many people lose sight of the fact that there are people in a relationship that has to work on all levels, not just a sub and a Dom. I cannot compartmentalize these things, I am an amalgam of all parts of my desires, needs, wants, knowledge, and actions. Therefore if I am a good partner and have one, the sub/Dom thing will fall into place.
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