RE: Bewitched, Bothered and Bewildered

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RE: Bewitched, Bothered and Bewildered - 2/17/2010 4:55:08 PM

Lorenzo19

Posts: 237
Joined: 2/8/2010
Status: offline

Sara, I did read your profile and I read your introduction and I read your journel entries. And you are right you never said you are or wanted to be a Mistress.

you didnt read Me. I said I was reading between the lines. I never take a profile at face value. people reveal themselves in subtle ways like a huge picture of yourself in your introduction topic among other things.

(in reply to lizi)

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Post #: 41

RE: Bewitched, Bothered and Bewildered - 2/17/2010 5:28:54 PM

Andalusite

Posts: 2492
Joined: 1/25/2009
Status: offline

I've had a few relationships (~6 months to 2 years) that sound pretty much like what you are currently looking for. I met the men in question through vanilla hobbies or mutual friends, rather than at kink events, but let them know about my inclinations around the 3rd date. While I was a Domme for 5 years in my first BDSM-oriented relationship and a submissive for 3 years in my last relationship, and am currently a slave, those others were more "egalitarian kinky." I tended to like being in charge a bit in the bedroom, and leaned a little bit dominant in general, but we didn't have a defined D/s relationship, or any protocol other than being polite.

I didn't get involved in the public scene at all until about 5 years ago, after about 10 years of pursuing it privately. I was nervous about going to my first munch, but a straight submissive female friend of mine arranged to meet up and introduce me around to folks, which made it a lot easier.

This particular site, especially the forums, tends to lean more toward the D/s rather than physical BDSM side of things, and some people seem to automatically assume that anyone who is a top, bottom, or non-D/s switch is only interested in casual play, or selfish, or of all things, vanilla.

Lorenzo, how on earth do you get that she wants to be a Mistress from her posting a vanilla picture of herself?!?

< Message edited by Andalusite -- 2/17/2010 5:30:07 PM >

(in reply to Whiplashsmile4)

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Post #: 42

RE: Bewitched, Bothered and Bewildered - 2/17/2010 5:34:30 PM

DesFIP

Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline

I see a woman who wants to start with bedroom submission inside of a committed relationship and see where it goes. Who wants a full life including a family. And who doesn't want to be just a slave kept naked and kneeling all day.

I have that. Holly has that. Lots of us have that. We are married or in long term relationships, we have kids and dogs and cats. We see family and friends.

Start by dating, not by playing. And if the man doesn't make your heart go pitter patter move on. If he does but you also see he doesn't want what you want, move on. Most of all, believe him. Don't get involved with a man who wants poly when you know you don't. Don't get involved with someone who insists you invite your sister/best friend to join you in bed. You know what works for you, stick to that.

_____________________________

Slave to laundry

Cynical and proud of it!

(in reply to texangael)

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Post #: 43

RE: Bewitched, Bothered and Bewildered - 2/17/2010 5:47:21 PM

AnimusRex

Posts: 2165
Joined: 5/13/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: DesFIP
Start by dating, not by playing. And if the man doesn't make your heart go pitter patter move on. If he does but you also see he doesn't want what you want, move on. Most of all, believe him. Don't get involved with a man who wants poly when you know you don't. Don't get involved with someone who insists you invite your sister/best friend to join you in bed. You know what works for you, stick to that.

Pretty much what Kim and I would advise, except more well-spoken. Find a good man, and work from there.
Good luck.

(in reply to DesFIP)

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Post #: 44

RE: Bewitched, Bothered and Bewildered - 2/17/2010 8:25:43 PM

SarasSecret

Posts: 15
Joined: 2/16/2010
Status: offline

Such great advice everyone!! Thank you so much for taking the time to read my post and my profile. I have been dating in the vanilla world too and while guys are curious at first it just never works out. I'm hopeful though and will continue to learn and see people in both arenas.

(in reply to AnimusRex)

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Post #: 45